"What Have They Done To You?"

Lilttle Holly!!

I-

THANK YOU?!

After years of knowing about it but never knowing what was actually in it, I have finally acquired a copy of the rare 2008 UK promotional book “Who is Artemis Fowl?”

I was very excited to get my hands on it, as there was the possibility of exclusive content! To lay eyes on official AF content that I’ve never seen before, in 2022? Very exciting. Join me as I explore this tiny treasure!

First, a little background info on this thing can be found at: artemis-fowl.com/the-books/artemis-fowl-book/

So, it is quite small and thin, being a free promotional item included in a magazine. It’s got 64 pages, and is roughly 4x7 inches in size (11x18 cm).

The bulk of the pages are devoted to short extracts from all 6 (at the time) Artemis Fowl books. It came out before Time Paradox released; it has a little blurb at the end advertising that book as releasing soon, in August 2008.

The extracts are: Book 1: The brief prologue, plus the scene where Artemis enters Angeline’s bedroom and she has the mannequin of Timmy. Book 2: The scene right near the beginning where Artemis views the ransom video message on his laptop. Book 3: The scene where Holly agrees to heal Butler. Book 4: The scene after Holly saves Artemis from the hotel missile and they talk. Book 5: The opening scene where Artemis swaps fingers. Book 6: The exchange of money for lemur between Little Arty and Kronski in the leather souk, cutting off just as Holly and Artemis go in to intervene.

There is also a short extract from the original 2007 graphic novel. It’s the first few pages of the Holly intro chapter, printed in black & white.

The extracts are all well and good, but I was of course most interested in the prospect of exclusive content. And there is indeed some stuff that isn’t found anywhere else!

-A multiple-choice quiz on the characteristics of the different fairy species, with some very amusing wrong answers. -A list of Artemis’ top 10 heroic moments (according to Eoin, I guess?). Not sure what the point of this is. I guess it’s just to hype up Time Paradox, since it wasn’t out yet but it’s included in the list. -A bit from Matt (of AFC website fame) saying why the series is so special, interspersed with other fan testimonials. -A promo for the “2008 LAFTA Awards” that was held on the AF website(?). Lol.

But the most exciting part of this little book, in my opinion? Official illustrations from Giovanni Rigano (graphic novel guy) are included in the Time Paradox extract! There are 3 illustrations, and they’re exclusive to this little book. I had no idea that this existed. We now have official art of the lovely human being known as Damon Kronski!

I am including images of the book’s exclusive content for your viewing pleasure, which I’ve never seen shared online before (though I could be wrong). Since this book is evidently rare and elusive, I think it’s important that this stuff be accessible in the public record. There’s nothing mind-blowing or earth-shattering here, but I think it’s still pretty neat! Now we know what’s in this thing!

(tap/click on an image to view full uncropped size)

Why doesn't ai do actual useful stuff?

It understands shit to some point

I could just use it to block certain things that i don't wanna see. I mean it can probably do even better stuff too but why the fuck not even this simple example?

Timangelino ✨ i was too lazy to draw 3 people so i combined them

Greetings, I'm the new asshole you'll be dealing with🖤 please come pick up this random person I kidnapped so I can steal your gold.

Came to tumblr after such a long time and faced this.

I used to ship A/H too. God damnit its a fucking children's book. People consuming media of this fandom, many of them are either teenagers or kids. Having sth they like harassed just isn't it. First time i posted sth (slightly) A/H, not even a kiss, just a hug or sth like that and sb called me a pedophile, i didn't know what the hell that even meant.

Fucking leave it at this point

CW: pedo mention, suicide

I have a request. And this may get me blocked or hated even more by the AF community:

Can we stop the aminosity towards A/H shippers? Anti culture is celebrated in our fandom now, and like, cool if you don't ship anyone, but many of you on this platform find a way to literally bully or harass fans who are openly A/H. I also used to get endless inboxes of anon hate and harassment, even so far as telling me to 'KYS', or calling me a pedophile.

Let's make something very fucking clear: Redirect your issues to Colfer instead, because he wrote the 6th book. HE wrote the kiss. HE wrote them having feelings for eachother. Yes, as kids, a lot of us attached to this. Maybe it's from shared trauma, maybe it's a comfort place. Whatever someone's reason is for shipping, they DON'T need to explain themselves, or be made guilty for their preferences! Instead of harassing A/H shippers as if we spun the oldest celebrated ship from midair, how about you complain about damn Colfer?! He's not a poor innocent Irishman that had nothing to do with it. Give me a break.

Now, your hate and despise of the ship DOES affect other people when you go into the Hartemis tag and write on shippers' posts, literally heckling and harassing them. You know who you all are. I haven't checked it recently, but around 7 months ago, it was filled with HATE. HATE. AND HATE. I saw one very celebrated user telling Hartemis shippers to kill themselves. Honestly. If you look folks, it's there. Fuck that. If being an anti means you support hate and harassment, get the fuck off my tumblr lol.

I have had so many, SO many people come to me in messages to discuss A/H. I have had younger fans, literal kids, message me with art and explain they didn't feel safe posting it to tumblr because of the antis and hatred of A/H. ARE. YOU. KIDDING. ME. Do you know how angry this makes me? This is disgusting behavior, that children can't post their work without an anti yelling at them they're supporting pedophilia.

Which do you think is more harmful?! Supporting A/H? Or isolating young teens or kids and making their work and art feel worthless and unwanted?

Btw: none of the A/H shippers call our ship Hartemis. That's a you guys thing, lol. We like A/H. They don't need a ship name so it's easier to mock.

In short, leave people alone. Stop intermingling your personal issues into other's lives. Don't like Hartemis? Leave the fandom then! You tell us to gtfo, so you can as well! 😬 I really dont have anything inspirational or nice to say here. I'm disappointed that such a tiny fandom has been literally split apart in half, and half of them are not allowed to interact with the other.

We're so tiny, guys. We literally don't have to isolate each other. I was so depressed when I first joined tumblr and got so much hate, and to know there are kids who are messaging me, revealing they're getting hate? That they're scared to post? To rant and rave and ramble like the rest of us? It's disappointing. It really is.

CW: pedo mention, suicide

Most people who lose a body part experience something called 'the phantom pain'

Wich is basically when the brain goes "you know what? Imma refuse this body part doesn't exist, gonna think its there, and right now, it hurts like LITERAL HELL"

Wip of my take on artemis's children:

First born kid is Aurora Julius Fowl Rider (yes her middle name is after Root, that made Holly tear up.) but everyone calls her Jack or Jacky. The nickname came from a time in her childhood when she wanted to be a pirate like captian Jack Sparrow and Alex started calling her little Jacky and it kinda stuck. Shes got brown eyes and black hair. Shes kind of a mix of both Artemis and Alex. Is very athletic, also very intelligent. Shes obsessed with guns, and builds her own high tech guns. She grew up very close to Holly and also wanted to be an police officer just like her. She takes a lot of risks, loves to party and of course, shes gay.

She graduated academy a few years early and kicked criminals' asses in New York City since she was 16. She also worked as a spy for LEP.

+i just need to add some angst, she dies in her twentis.

Ill be posting about the next two children too.

Meet Holly

Shes my new bunny!

Folks yall thought im done with my children's au shit? Nope.

Meet my next oc, Star. Jacks gf.

Heres her stepping 2 adulthood (the Fowlriders' sassy-ness rubbed off on her)

Also no shes not good at shooting, and shes just there cuz she loves drama.

Heres the girl gang:

And here are the love birds