I’ll Join You! We Are Gonna Throw Down Like We Are Ho-testants On Trashy Reality TV

God damn it, Simeon, I’m a lawyer. My fucking mouth is the least offensive thing about me, I fucking promise.

I’m glad Obey Me isn’t real because Simeon would hate me for how much I swear

Draw! The! Boys! As! Rats!

That is all, plzkthx.

What if Mammon had an albino rat?

I had a name for the rat, but then I realized it was sort of racist-

I assume a devildom rabbit would be sort of like the Monty Python bunny...

...but yes, OC Emerson is taking that bad boy home

So I had an idea based off of Beelzebub's card "Where did the Rabbit go?" And I thought what would a Devildom rabbit look like. And so this came to be.

A Devildom Rabbit

Funny enough, unlike the human realm's rabbit, these creatures are feared wild beasts known for their blood thirsty nature. They may look cute but they are one of the most dangerous creatures out there.

They have a diet of anything that moves and have been known to regularly eat lower ranking demons.

Though its a dangerous creature its fur is a rare and well sought after luxury. Though obtaining it is extremely difficult.

Strangely enough though this beast hunts anything it can find, it has a soft spot for humans. They will approach humans and wiggle around until they get affection and often follows them around without showing any aggressive tendencies toward them. They even go so far as to snuggle up to them and let the humans hold them.

One came up to Abel. Mammon's tried to fight it. But Abel picked up and refused to put it down.

Would your Mc/ Oc try to keep it as a pet?

My first post on this lurker-only Tumblr account will be to announce that I am gay hee for Jaehee. Die mad about it.

Reminder that Jaehee Kang is gorgeous, amazing and under appreciated.

Reblog if you agree.

Clyde Barrow was definitely a killer, but it is highly likely that Bonnie didn’t kill anybody! She was apparently quite charming, and wanted to be considered a lady: she was very concerned that the press thought she was a smoker, because she posed with a cigar in this famous picture:

So if Bonnie was the sweetheart and Clyde was the criminal, I guess Mammon and MC could be Bonnie and Clyde? Except for where they got brutally shot to death in an ambush? And Bonnie had a raging gangrenous leg from a car accident? Which isn’t really that romantic?

Maybe they should just be Victoria and Albert...

Mammon: We're such a good couple

MC: *giggles*

Mammon: We're like The Joker and Harley Quinn

MC: The Joker and Harley had a horrible toxic relationship..

Mammon: Ok, We're like Bonnie & Clyde.

MC: Bonnie & Clyde killed people Mammon..

Mammon: We're like Fred and Rose West.

MC: Mammon..Please stop talking.

~

When you’re riddled with anxiety over living in another four years of a fascist hellscape and you’re still hungover from drinking an entire bottle of Wild Turkey during election night coverage and you had to be hungover in court and the judge thought you were a monumental dumbass

BUT

THERE’S A PROPOSAL POP QUIZ

AND I GOT THE SATAN SSR

I assume they are talking about the Vesper necklace from Crave, which vibrates (although I don’t know how well it functions as an actual vibrator):

However, I think it also looks a lot like this necklace which I happen to own and can confirm does not operate as a sex toy:

Geometric jewelry like that was very on trend a couple years ago, so I’ve got a couple things like that. Not sure why you wouldn’t be able to find other examples (answer: the vibrator necklace is funnier).

BiTcH wHaT

When my sister and I turned out to only date atheists/Jewish people, and my dad found my social media full of atheist memes, he gave us a long lecture about how “we look down on good God-fearing people” and we are what’s wrong with this country. Pretty sure if he knew I was into fictional demons, by now he’d just shrug and accept that he has failed as a good Christian parent. LMAO.

FR though, it gets better. They learn to accept you, possibly by just avoiding the topic of religion (fine by me), or they don’t, in which case you can set your own boundaries and create your own support system. I’m always around to lend an ear for the budding atheist in the midst of southern-Christian-America. :)

Damn, I feel you. My family is very religious and spiritual and if they found out that I even played obey me and that I've fell in love with almost all of the Demon brothers in the game and Diavolo then my Mom would call my uncle and have him rebaptize lol. And she'll give me a lecture about how wrong it is even though it's just a game :/

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL FOR US WIFBSHS I feel like my mom wants to send me to a convent now 😭😭 wait till they find out im an athiest

My feelings for Diavolo are complicated, ok? I just want to be in a Lucifer/Mammon sandwich to appease my Id and Superego at the same time. Can’t I just live???

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Beel: who's on dinner duty tonight?

Satan: that would be mammon.

Satan: he should be here right about-

Mammon, dumping out a shopping bag full of Lunchables onto the table: GUESS WHAT WE'RE HAVING FOR DINNER