Barkgch - Wahooooo!

Goofy Jake Animation to learn Procreate.

Alright alright tonight's lesson before my sleeping pills knock me out is about how to socialize when you don't know how

You will need:

a genuine interest in people

some premade sentences

practice

bravery

So you're a neurodivergent adult who wants to make friends? Let this awkward weirdo of an extrovert explain a technique refined over decades.

The most important lesson I could impart you is:

We all want friends.

So you can go into the world knowing that other person would also like to be your friend.

Step 1, the hardest thing you've done in your life: The opener.

Listen, this sucks, but this whole operation rests on the idea that everyone hates taking the first step so might as well do it yourself.

You and person B are in a social situation. You have never talked, but you would like to. So you can borrow one of these:

I love your dress! Did you make it yourself? I love the pattern.

Oh, nice Deadpool tshirt, hello, fellow fan!

Wow I can't believe Linda left us without making presentations. Hi, I'm Carol.

Oh hey, I've seen you work over there, I'm right over here! 6 am shifts, huh?

Well this awkward silence won't break itself. Hi, I'm Tracy and I like horses. You?

I haven't seen you at these parties before! Come, sit with me, let's talk. Who do you know here?

The point is:

Greeting

point something you might have in common

ask a question.

(you'll find your favorites eventually).

Attention, muy importante:

YOU NEED TO BE GENUINE

It needs to be true. You need to find the other person interesting, and be curious and joyful about them.

These premade examples only work if the feeling behind is true.

Step 2: Be interested

There should be the start of a conversation going. You can ask about what they do, what interests them, whatever follows your opening line. And then react favorably.

Ex:

'Yeah, I'm a statistician.'

'I know absolutely nothing about numbers so I'm impressed. What exactly is it that you do?'

or

'I work at the McDonald's down the street.'

'I heard working there is exhausting, working on your feet and being nice all day long sounds tiring.'

Once again:

You need to be genuine in your delight. People are different, jobs are all respectable and hard to do, you can empathize with everyone over being tired/it's the weekend/can't wait for summer/etc.

Step 3: The middle

We're all awkward, we're all weird, and we mostly all learned how to fit in society despite being err, too much.

So I suggest: go with the level of masking that feels natural at first, and still keep a part of your true self ready to shine, because the goal is for them to get used to you gradually. This is, after all, a first meeting.

Ex: I slow down my speech, try to tone down the excitement, but I won't change my opinions or personality. So you do whatever has worked for you in the past.

Also, we're all a bit too nerd and too online, so I guess we got a lot of quotes and preinstalled humor. If used correctly, they work with regular people and they end up thinking you're super witty when you actually just quoted Parks and Recs.

Step 4: The end

In the end of the conversation, you should get a feel if you'd like to stay acquaintances or if you'd really like them as a friend.

How to close with acquaintances:

I was glad to meet you! Hope to see you at Sam's next birthday, haha!

Yeah, the convention was great, let me give you my discord--

My break is over, gotta go. See you around, Ted!

Vague acknowledgement of seeing them in the future, nothing concrete.

BUT if you want to become friends, you're gonna have to put the work, and plan the next time you'll see each other:

This was great, I loved talking about your opinions on subject X. Do you think we could get a coffee, sometime next week, so we can continue the discussion?

You guys are so cool. Do you want to go see the next marvel movie? Yeah, invite that other friend too! Ok I'm sending facebook invites, I'll make an event--

Next week we can do Mario Party and beer at my place.

Mostly, this step requires you to work, organize, and be dependable. People want to be invited to things, but often won't do it first. They'll be grateful that someone else is taking the initiative.

And you will need to do it more than once, too. Establish channels of communication and feed them with conversations, jokes and memes.

And keep inviting them to things. Becoming friends takes time, you have to make sure to create that time.

Hope this can help a couple of you.

be direct, be genuine, be consistent

Day 10 of 2023

The Grinter

~

Vee - January 10th of 2023

garfield requests from 2020

sunny day

There is nothing better than wandering the world with your friends!

If you know, you know. If you don’t, this is a reference:

BIG DOG SWAGGER (funk tune i made with some friends)

(spotify)

keep making eyes. what colour should I do next