Hell Yeah

how would companions react to a sole who goes to freakish extents to keep up with their pre-war skincare/hygiene?

like theyll charge straight into synth infested underground secret labs, turn the entire wasteland inside out, break into the institute, etc, just to find a 200 year old expired moisturizer from a specific brand

In terms of originality, I believe you have accomplished something unique And I was amazed at how much pleasure I experienced from writing it. I really admire the efforts you are doing to uncover good ideas; they are outstanding, and I haven't come across ideas of this kind much from reading the companion reacts of other authors I really appreciate how much you've tested me and how much fun you've given me I hope you'll enjoy reading it

PS: I admit I only realised… after… all the details were asked… that I forgot about the battle side vs synth, etc… I hope you don't mind…

Cait : At first, she finds it humorous—very little, but amusing nevertheless. And it's keeping them occupied. However, after a few weeks, it becomes monotonous. Every day, find a place where they may possibly take a shower, constantly track hints on where there might be some accessories that Sole wants to get in order to retain their "hygiene," and lastly, these never-ending complaints about everything Sole can't find.

Cait is finally fed by having to turn back on their track for eight hours so that Sole can take their sacred shower in vault 111. She takes her friend's and drops it in the first pool of mud she comes across, then walks away without looking back, while the other protests that the radiation must have completely damaged their self-tanner.

Codsworth : It's entirely natural. Madam/Sir cannot accept anything other than the highest, and he gladly lends himself to hunting down the elements necessary to get the whole set that Madam/Sir requires. A blow dryer? This one will have to be fixed by Sturges. An emollient? Codsworth learned of a privately owned factory that stored its most remarkable recipes in a trunk that had to withstand the test of time. A razor that is still brand new? Codsworth can surely find a Super Mart that still has some packaged. The butler will go to great lengths to outfit a bathroom worthy of its name for the care of his master/mistress.

Curie : She is utterly enthralled. She comments every discovery made by Sole, recalling everything she knows about product development, and they spend a lot of time grooming and caring, thanks to them. The numerous creams on which they work are added to the treasure-house where they already possess notable accessories. After all, the foundation of excellent living practices is a healthy mind in a healthy body.

Danse : "What's wrong with my smell?"

Danse tries to smell through its armor, and while the gesture is amusing, Sole is dead serious.

"A fantastic combination of pork sweat and castor oil. Furthermore, the outcome of castor oil. You neglect yourself, my dear."

"I'm in great shape and on a healthy-eating diet-

"But you have no idea what the word shower means."

"I know exactly what a shower is, and in the citadel—

"But you don't appear to be at the citadel."

"Certainly, we must take into account—

"There's nothing to think about. Look at these nails! Tsk. And your hair. When was the last time you gave this hair a conditioner?"

"A…what?"

Sole continues to row among the ruins, their irritation palpable. Danse, for one, thinks he has entered a parallel dimension. Nobody ever criticized him on his hair... or his nails.

"I'd like to know the exact nature of the technology we're attempting to trace so that I can include the details in my report."

"I went back to a terminal to the last place of delivery of eye care pads that allow real miracles for eye bags."

"For what?"

"Having poached eyes must no longer be only remarkable after such a detestable sleep cycle as yours. But I'm not going to tell you what the wasteland's sleeping circumstances are doing to my skin, and I'd like to lighten my look, which is more moribund than... Danse? Danse, where are you going?"

"I go back to the Prydwen. When you regain your senses, you could come and reach for me, and we shall embark on a true mission."

Deacon : "Yeah, baby! I just found a cucumber wrinkle treatment tube."

"Fan-tas-tic!" screamed Sole, who was completely in awe. "And look at the anti-aging cream I had got! In addition to the Dead Sea Water Moisturizer, we will soon have everything we require for total care."

"All I can do now is think about it," Deacon declares.

Dogmeat : Follow Sole everywhere they goes. Even if his master/mistress gets angry because he chews on a strange toy with picks or a tube with a particularly pleasant-smelling product, he obeys. He'll go to hell with them if it’s what they ask.

Elder Maxson : Sole had a hard time convincing Maxson to go down to the warehouses. His officer, on the other hand, said that they needed his permission to acquire access to a tool crucial to the success of their operation in the Commonwealth. Ingram raises an eyebrow as they approach the protected hangar entrance.

"No! I said no!" she exclaims.

Sole proudly proclaims, "I have Maxson!"

"Can you tell me exactly what you require of me, Knight?"

"Ingram won't let me go into the warehouse, but I know one of the Commonwealth's last functional flat irons is in the container G-86b."

"What are you talking about?"

"A flat iron, sir," Ingram quotes coldly. "A cosmetic, to put it plainly. Your Knight wishes to get access to our well-guarded warehouses in order to undergo a makeover."

Even if the chances of it being a joke are slim, the Elder cannot see it being anything other than a joke.

"Knight, please explain yourself quickly and give me a better reason than a... makeover," he sneers.

"I want this flat iron, and I'm going to smash this door with a mini gun if I have to."

This is how Sole passes his night behind bars in Cambridge.

Hancock : Before he can even finish breathing his Jet, a shrieking Sole leaps onto his neck. Hancock misses swallowing the inhaler.

"Finally! After all these weeks of investigation! He's finally here! Over there, on the other side of this door!"

Hancock examines the terminal, which displays a list of what is in the warehouse.

"A... a what?"

"A tanning station! I'm sure Sturges will be able to hook them up to a generator at Sanctuary, and FINALLY! I'll be able to bathe in precisely calibrated UV."

Hancock sighs and shakes his head. He'll need at least two mentats to understand this one. He puts on the pills and searches his coat for a second inhaler.

"A tanning station? "So, what's the point?"

"To achieve a flawless and even complexion worthy of a Hollywood star."

"Holly… I...don't grasp a word."

The mayor of Goodneighbor concludes that he needs to take two additional tablets. Especially when Sole overcomes the door's security, and the hangar opens to reveal the massive... umm... pods.

"And how are you going to transport that to Sanctuary?"

Sole’s face is completely decomposing. They stare around in panic, unable to solve the problem that their friend has just presented.

"Do you have buffout? Many, many buffout?"

Gage : "If you don't drop this bag immediately, I'll shoot."

Porter casts a peek towards Sole, pointing his weapon to show how serious he is.

"We wouldn't be here if you had helped me with everything."

The raider sarcastically giggles, then engages the security on his gun.

"Gaaaaaage! I need these creams!"

"No, what you need are capsules and rigor."

"I am absolutely certain that what the raiders most lack is self-esteem, and you cannot have self-esteem when you are not clean."

"Clean?"

The lieutenant is shaken for a minute, then sniffs his armpit.

"I took a bath on Wednesday; I'm clean enough."

"Not to mention that we're on Saturday, I'm not going to tell you about your terrible skin."

"What about my skin? It fits perfectly, unlike your ghoul friend."

"If you want it to stay that way, you should help me."

Porter reluctantly agreed to take half the loot in exchange for never hearing about it again. That's not to say Sole already planning a shipment for the following week, because he heard from a merchant that a plant is still brimming with beauty items that bomb survivors have shunned for the previous two centuries.

MacCready : Sole yelled and chewed, but the mercenary turned is back when he realized they had come all this way for hair brushes and hairspray. It's the most foolish, idiotic thing he's ever been dragged into. To put it bluntly, Sole has lost his forgiveness forever.

"... how many capsules can be produced by setting up a beauty station..."

And, by the time Sole finishes their sentence, MacCready has returned.

"I can only carry this bag and this one; otherwise, I won't be able to aim and shoot."

Nick Valentine : "... and this applicator allows a uniform application of the lotion..."

Nick sighs and rolls his eyes. He only hears with one ear while Sole stuffs these things into his hands and pockets. He feels as though he is returning to his wedding preparations, as Jenny explains why it is critical not to use white napkins on cream tablecloths. The thought draws something painful from the depths of his bowels, and against himself, he releases a little, agonizing sound that he cannot control.

"Nick? I... did I put on too much? Something caused you pain? Oh, I'm really sorry!"

"No. My sorry. I was kind of... lost in my thoughts. Keep going."

But Sole refuses to go on. They believe they have exploited their friend's incredible patience and realize that it is time to go home after seeing him submerged in accessories of all colors, giving him the appearance of a Christmas tree.

"Come. On the way, I think I saw a gas station. If you want the journey to be genuinely rewarding, spare room for a couple bottles of coolant."

Nick smiles softly as they walk out of the beauty research and development lab.

Piper : "Curve my hair?"

"Yes! And if you use this conditioner, they'll be so brilliant—

"... that I'll be noticed from afar by a super-mutant. Really, Blue, I'm not sure what you're on about with all these things and stuff."

Sole scolds. They've had this conversation hundreds of times, and despite their points of view, Piper refuses to be persuaded. It becomes irritating for them. After John revealed to them that he was acquiring his items from an old store whose storefront was collapsed but which could be accessed through the sewers, Sole managed to find the appropriate words to take her on a new quest of scavenge of hairstyle accessories. Piper is sulking and acting in bad faith now that she realizes it's not about a juicy story at all, so Sole is attempting to win her over the body care... in vain.

Preston : He makes a silly smile as he watches Sole demonstrate curling eyelashes. The General has been talking for about a half hour, giving Preston a brief explanation of everything they discovered in the hull of this half-aground boat, but Preston doesn't understand anything and has stopped listening. He simply enjoys the smile on the lips of the person he greatly admires. And Sole doesn't seem to notice. They have now switched to a laser epilator, which, once adapted to be powered by an atomic battery, can greatly simplify the Minutemen's lives. Preston shakes his head. He doesn't see how the device will help the Minutemen, but he nods his head.

Strong : Sole repeatedly knocks on the wall that Strong collapsed at the warehouse's entrance, but nothing happens. The super mutant is deaf to their pleas. Strong flew into a rage when he realized they were seeking for body milk rather than milk of human kindness, and he punched his way out of the building by smashing into the columns that supported the ceiling. As a result, Sole is trapped inside among the crates of beauty supplies, unable to escape. They hope Strong realizes his error and returns for them... they genuinely hope so.

X6-88 : The Courser rushes when Sole opens the package holding the natural pumice stones mounted on a cherry wood handle. X6 immediately switches to point-and-shoot mode and shoots until nothing but ashes and twigs remain. Sole looks at him, his face flushed with rage.

"How could you!? Do you know how long it took me to track down the purchase orders to try to find that crate?"

"What exactly was in that crate to cause such a state of excitement that I was confused and believed that you were in greater risk?"

"The most exfoliating pumice on the market two hundred years ago. Do you have any idea how likely it is that...?"

"What exactly does exfoliating imply?"

"Impurities and dead skin are extruded. It gives the skin the smoothness of a newborn."

"Are you able to elaborate on the significance of having silky smooth skin like a newborn in the execution of your responsibilities?"

"It's easier to charm directors if I have good skin?"

"Negative. Your argument doesn't seem to hold up when weighed against the amount of work you've put into pursuing this goal, which is turning out to be unsuccessful.

"It's unsuccessful because you just fried the entire container."

"It is unsuccessful because it is considerably insignificant. Permit me to inform you that if you keep squandering your valuable time on such pointless endeavors, I will come to the conclusion that you are an insignificant individual."

In the face of the agent's dreadfully indifferent demeanor, Sole prefers to say nothing and vows never to take the Courser on another beauty mission.

Pure Genius!

there was typos in the lyrics but it adds character ok

i dont think anyone has done this before but if they have then sorry

I need this fic.

"Omg Julie is keeping Frank and Eddie apart!" "Julie would be jealous/possessive/'yandere'!"

Fools! Julie would catch one whiff of her best friend having a crush on the mailman and orchestrate so many fanfic-level situations to try and get them together with increased fervour and getting more and more convoluted as time goes on.

The Tower is also my wife

Immediately after this, (and once Quincey was out of earshot), there was the expected huffing and puffing and I Am the Master of This Castle and These Mountains et cetera, et cetera.

Jonathan tried to ride it out in nodding noncommittal silence.

Mina, devoid of even a fraction of a fuck to give, agreed yes, of course he was. But out of curiosity, when was the last time he attended to anything to do with his title or its duties in the last, say, twenty years? She seems to recall someone of more maturity stepping in to manage every iota of the work while the Master of the Castle was busy with the terribly trying labor of, let her check her notes, strutting around being impressed with himself. Is it not so?

Dracula, doubly pissed, ready to erupt and go full Monster Mode, slipped into a fuming villain monologue--

And his voice cracked.

Jonathan was stone-faced, but white-knuckling his armrest. Mina's psychic laughter could shake the Carpathians. Quincey popped his head in to ask what's the matter, did something happen? Notably, with a pubescent pitch not that many octaves removed from the Count's.

That night was full of thunder and the next family dinner saw the Count grousing that he had no appetite tonight. Or the next. Not until he was iron grey, for some reason.

Jonathan, meanwhile, found his shaving kit mysteriously returned. Plus enough shaving lather to last a decade.

Consider this a cap to this bit of nonsense. Scruffy Winter Mode Jonathan has to get back to his clean-shaven self somehow.

Final apologies to @ibrithir-was-here, thank you for putting up with the shenanigans

(Note: If you haven't jumped on the Blood of My Blood AU, you're missing out. One of the tastiest Dracula Bad Ending stories-in-progress I've ever come across.)

I’m starting to believe Donald Trump isn’t Human, rather he’s an orange Basketball that somehow got the personality of 4chan, that someone glued a wig to.

why even deny jewish indigeneity to the land of israel, it doesn’t change the fact that palestinians deserve better and it doesn’t help them receive better so why

why assert such an antisemitic position, why say that jews are really from europe or whatever and make it your hill to die on, why deny a simple fact when denying it doesn’t help palestinians whatsoever

jews are indigenous to the levant, that isn’t negotiable and any argument that tries to deny this very basic fact will never succeed in improving the lives of palestinians

Earnie, and Bert are best couple!

these are just my colored sketches but im not going to be done with this project for two more weeks so im posting these now before it becomes irrelevant

i loved sesame street growing up and i wish there was more representation of lgbt people living regular lives. being gay is often equated with just sex. i wanted to show bert & ernie in their shared domestic life for this assignment.

Truth!

Me: haha Crusader Kings II is probably just like Hearts of Iron! This will be easy!

Crusader Kings II: YOU WILL LOSE 95% OF YOUR KINGDOM UPON YOUR DEATH, ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE BASTARDS AND NOT LEGITIMATE, THERE ARE 19 PLOTS AGAINST YOUR LIFE, 4 CHALLENGES TO YOUR SUCCESSION, THE VASSALS DEMAND AN ELECTIVE MONARCHY, YOU HAVE -348 GOLD, YOUR WIFE HATES YOU, THE DUKE OF FUCKELSTIEN HAS DECLARED YOU A PRETENDER TO THE THRONE AND THE POPE JUST EXCOMMUNICATED YOU

Me: 

The new Redwall movie is looking dope!

You swerve to avoid a squirrel. Unknown to you, the squirrel pledges a life debt to you. In your darkest hour, the squirrel arrives.