I Wish I Could Just Approach Him. I Wish Faith Would Someone Make Us Cross Roads. I Wish I Knew What

I am one unnecessary and out of nowhere comment about my eating away from completely blowing off at my parents.

It's Friday night and I'm crying over things that will never change. I can't can't fucking cut myself since my dad is in the room next to me.

I just wish is wasn't myself. I wish I had a different mind, a different body, a different existence. That I didn't exist at all

It would be food from store from this town that I won't be able to get before Monday otherwise. And like, the taste and texture of the food haunts me. I can't think abt anyhting else. Even that ill be able to eat other shit when I get home doesn't console me. I can't sleep because all I can think about is that food.

The fact that I acc have to resist the thought about skipping school just go and buy food is wild, cause the school in question is a short, nice and actually useful.

Need to keep myself in check cause I feel so close to asking my mom if she could live on if I died.

Gonna fast till Thursday noon. Right now it's only almost at hour 10, but gotta push thru it.

If only I had an obsession who I could actually interact with. Who I could actually talk with, get to know them better, become deeply obsessed with them.

NOOOO!!! A GIRL IVE BECOME GOOD FRIENDS WITH OVER THE MONTHS JUST TOLD ME SHE HAS AN ED. NOW MY BRAIN WILL AUTOMATICALLY START SEEING HER AS COMPETITION, START HYPERANALYZING EVERYTHING I AND SHE DO AND SAY AND ITLL START TO SPITE HER FOR BEING SKINNIER THAN ME.

A bot just messaged me, advertising a sketchy dating site. I might have attracted the wrong energy lol

What do I have to do to attract a yandere?? Do I have to summon them with a ritual, bring a sacrifice??

Tomorrow I'll have to go to the staff manager at my summer job and look over my contract. I should ask for more pay than last summer but idk how ughhh.

And then day after that I'll actually have ti go to work. In theory it's not that bad, but just the idea of it fills me with unlimited tread.

People think being lovesick is just so funny. Just a little heehee joke to toss around. They have no idea what it's like to feel this. To constantly crave attention, and the pain and obsession, especially when you don't get any. It's like my brain is on fire and most of the time I can't even say anything because people will just avoid me even more. They have no idea.