Bart: I’m The Little Spoon!

IDFK

Imagine an abortion company where the slogan is "we dont shoot the babies into you, we shoot the babies already there"

Bart Allen is an edge lord, too.

Jason Todd is impulsive.

What more do you want from me?

THE BOY EVER !!

Stimmy Speedster Sunday II!

Nuts! Nuts!

[Young Justice 52]

The Prince and the Snake {Drarry One-Shot}

“Today, class, we will be making an exciting potion!” Professor Slughorn pipes. “Each of you already has the ingredients on your work table in front of you. Don’t touch them yet!” he ushers as one of the arrogant Gryffindors went to grab something. “These ingredients in particular make the creatura corpus potion. This potion works much like wolfsbane, but a short-term verion. You see, this concoction will turn any mythical creature and shift it to a human form for a small period of time depending on how well the potion was brewed.” he states. After he was finished explaining, Draco lazily flips to the page in his advanced potions book and began cutting the ginseng root into seven equal pieces, grinding the preficus wing into a fine powder, and mincing the calyfairvor. His partner, Blaise, was doing his tasks on the other end of the cauldron of boiling water. The blonde noticed, out of the corner of his eye, Blaise dropping pounded phealis crumbs before he could stop it from happening. The potion started bubbling, making ‘goop’ sounds. Blaise and Draco started pacing back, backing into the next table behind them. A large bubble of the murky green substance grew and popped, splattering in Draco’s direction. “Blaise! You so owe me!” Draco wiped the substance with his hands as his partner chuckled. Sparkles of light started shining around the blondes fingers and enveloped his whole body, stopping everyone’s laughter. Draco started to shrink, a terrified look on his face. His last reaction until he totally transformed was to look across the room on the Gryffindors side, straight into the green irises that watched in horror. The room went silent as the place where Draco Malfoy once stood was replaced with a white cobra snake. It lifted it’s little head and looked around the class at the amused/scared faces. It appeared to open its mouth to speak but it only came out in a hiss. “What are you all looking at?” Harry heard it say. The brunette stood and walked over to the dazed snake and started speaking in parseltongue. “Don’t freak out…” He said, apparating a mirror and showing off Draco’s new form. The new Draco sat there for a minute, staring at his reflection, not saying a word. Afterwards, he slithered over to his partner and started wrapping his body around their neck, choking them. Blaise let out a few strangled laughs before saying ‘worth it’ through his blocked air pipes. “Mister Malfoy, enough.” The professor stuttered while braking out of his surprizes daze. Draco, reluctantly, un wrapped himself and slithered onto the desk. “How do we reverse this?” he hissed at Slughorn. “He’s asking how to turn him back.” Harry acted as a translator. “Well, uh, there is one way I know. But it’s ridiculous. It may not work.” the professor nervously chuckled. Another series of hisses broke out from the cobra, and Harry coughed to stop him after he long made his point. “He asked to just say it anyway.” Harry chuckled, though he left out the rude parts. “Ah, yes. Well. The mishap can be undone by… a kiss from your chosen love.” Slughorn mutters loud enough with a deep sigh. “But surely something as ridiculous at that cannot work.” he added. “Is there some other way, professor? Malfoy is unable to love.” Ron mocks from his corner. “I do love someone, you insufferable prat.” Draco rolled his beady, little, blue eyes. Harry’s mouth gaped as he was the only one who could understand. Laughter broke out from behind Blaise and Draco’s worktable. Pansy Parkinson was brimming with her giggles. “Go on, Dray. Kiss whom you most dearly love.” she laughed even more when Draco pulled out his pure white hood and hissed venomously. She wiped a tear from her eyes and calmed down, smiling at the cobra. “I dare you.” She notes, and they stare at each other for a moment. “Potter, I need you to take me to someone.” Draco looks back to the emerald eyed Gryffindor. Harry nodded and picked Draco up, holding him close to his chest as to not drop him if they ran into someone, and left the classroom. After a bit of walking, the cobra tells Harry to stop. “Go into that alcove right there.” The Gryffindor was confused, but complied nonetheless. “I swear, Malfoy, if you bite me and leave me here to die, I will be so upset.” Harry closes the curtain. “I need you to kiss me.” Draco suddenly blurts out, leaving a following silence. “What?” Harry gulped, unable to hide his quickly spreading blush. “The professor said a kiss from your chosen love, correct? I’m sure you could fill it in from there. You’re not as dumb as you make yourself out to be.” Draco snaps back, avoiding eye contact… I think. Harry’s brain seemed to stop thinking at that moment. The only thing it pointed to was ‘do it’. He hadn’t an idea why. Maybe just to turn Draco back and get done with it. “Okay.” He said before he could convince himself otherwise. The little snakes head looked back at him (and as far as snake facial expressions could go) he could really hide his shock and confusion. “You better not be joking around cause then you just waisted both of our time.” Harry sighed, leaning over and placing a small peck to draco’s scaly lips. It wasn’t long until he felt his hands cupping soft cheeks and he was being smothered in affection. The kiss didn’t last long. Maybe a minute or two of slow, gentle movements. They separated, partially, still standing an inch away from each other. Draco felt Harry’s breath and could smell his woodley aftershave. “Thank you for changing me back.” he stepped back, feeling an emptiness when he didn’t get a response. Harry hated him. As Draco tried walking out of the curtains, a firm hand stopped him, holding his upper arm. “Draco, I-” Harry stared, but bit his lip when the blonde looked back in his adorable confusion. “Astronomy tower. Tonight. Uh, be there.” he blushed, quickly getting flustered by his vague instructions. Draco stepped back into the alcove, a small smile gracing his, usually stubborn features. “See you there, Harry.” He leaned forward slowly and placed another chaste kiss on Harry’s lips. The brunette’s hands found themselves to Draco’s chest, resting on his slim figure, fingers running over his silk robes.

Inaccurate Flashfam quotes #2

Bart Allen: Okay, this is it. I'm battling a Evil supervillain trying to kill me and probably my worstest enemy.

Bart's mind: Make casual conversation and playful banter the entire time.

Bart:

Bart: Let's do it.

REEEEEEEEEEEEE

OK i WANNA ADOPT THE BART PROSTHETIC LEG HEADCANON REAL QUICK

Y a l l, do you REALLY THINK that a gun shot wound of THIS CALIBER^ THAT C L O S E

Would have A N Y salvagable parts left of his knee??? LIke Speedsters heal fast but they don't grow back L I M B S. It shows the doctors doing surgrey and everything but in my mind it's like "WHAT KNEE, THERE'S NOTHING LEFT"

Do you KnOw how powerful that gun is?? I mean- you may not but IT'S PRETTY HECKIN STRONG

Listen. 100%, if Bart did get a prosthetic leg, like hell he's telling his team. This is Bart "I'm gonna bottle up all my emotions and then one day I'll die" Allen we're talking about. He's probably scared to tell anyone in case they think it'll cause problems and kick him off the team or something. Plus, he loves being pampered but he hates pity.

Bart needs one of these shirts. Right sprocking now.

steph made the shirts for them <3

cass - batgirl (2000) #25 and 72, with a bonus near-death experience in #62

damian - batman inc. (2012) #8, robin: son of batman #5 and #13, teen titans (2016) #40/41, and robin (2021) #1

idk as someone with adhd, which is what I headcanon Bart with, I could see the reading the whole library thing. I've burned through wikipedia articles and thousands related to them just cause, I could probably burn through a library in relative two years if I had the time off work and a reason. I do admit that his becoming more serious and Kid Flash was hella scuffed though ngl. Also this is in no way me saying that headcanoning him autistic is wrong, just offering another perspective. Hell he could be adhd and autistic, whatever way the character resonates with you.

Hyperfixation is actually very common! Bart has shown plenty times that he can focus his efforts on one thing while at superspeed, like when he does his homework that takes him two weeks in his perception of time, but a couple of seconds to the outside world. So the library thing doesn’t actually surprise me much! I think it’s great he’s expanded his knowledge and used his eidetic memory for more of a practical purpose. He’s basically a walking fact book of infinite knowledge and him knowing the entire human nervous system, how to take something apart and put back together, plus all those fun facts by memory is the coolest.

But on the other hand, Bart has a “danger deficit disorder” as it’s said. He’s gotten better at distinguishing real danger from nonexistent ones, but it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s the type to stop for a second. Bart thinks on his feet better than all the speedsters before him, and he comes up with plans that don’t need to be thought out so much as improvised. He’s the king at improvisation. Taking that away from his character basically strips him of a big thing that makes him unique and himself. It was a big no on their part. Listening to a plan means that’s wasted time to be saving people, stopping to look at his surroundings means that something could have been done quicker to stop his enemy. His mindset is what makes him impulse and they deprive him of that when making him “Kid Flash”. So uncool.

I think Mark Waid did a great job of keeping Bart’s development at a casual pace, keeping his character the same while still leaving room for growth. Plus, coding him with ADHD was a conscious decision on his end, which I find fantastic.

This newer version of Impulse feels too different to me. And after, y’know, DYING five times, you’d think he’d be less… cheery? Like— He was never to begin with! He’s, in simple terms, as teenager as they come. Not too bleak of an outlook, but not a peppy one either. Finds violent video games amusing and fights kids, steals cars, swears a bit, but not as much as people probably expect from highschoolers. He doesn’t just like to fit in, he wants to blend in the background, go unnoticed. Stay quiet and handle situations as they come.

Him as Kid Flash feels too off for me. Bart as anything but Impulse just feels like a violation.