Yuuji As A Bf

Who in your family is breeding you first? Is your daddy having you carry a grandchild for him? Are you making your brothers show which of them is the better boyfriend who deserves to knock his sister up? Maybe there's an aunt or a cousin you've been pining for years, who'll wait until you're asleep visiting them before filling you... or are you keeping yourself for the puppy you were gifted some years ago, who's all grown up and ruts his mommy bitch whenever he wants?

😵‍💫 can i have all of them? please please please!

i should’ve been had by my dad first since he made me but my brother got to me first 🫠

a/n: bcs childe would absolutely benefit from dating a lawyer (also a repost from one of my other accs!)

“finally!” childe exclaims, fist-pumping the air as he hops to his feet. “i was starting to think you’d all forgotten about me.”

tartaglia aka the eleventh harbinger aka childe had been the subject of multiple meetings you’d attended in the last few days. with him finally in custody, immunity void, everyone wanted their pound of flesh.

you roll your eyes, nodding your head for the guards to open the cell. “you’ve only been in holding for three hours.”

“three very long, very boring hours.” he briefly stretches his arms above his head, rocking on the balls of his feet as he blinks down at you. “so i take it you’re my lawyer?”

“that's correct,” you confirm, telling him your name and stepping back as the guard cuffs his hands, shoving him forward as his partner leads the two of you down the hall. you pretend not to notice as the harbinger studies the manacles, smirking as if he’s already figured a way out of them.

normally, you preferred to stay as far away as possible from the fatui— especially one as dangerous as a harbinger. as the liyue qixing’s main legal advisor, you’d already had a handful of run-ins with the snezhnayan “diplomats,” as they called themselves. while pantalone hadn’t been as cutthroat as childe in the literal sense, his wit and business savvy were just as fearsome.

yet here you were, actually representing a harbinger in court. a major conflict of interest, yes, concerning your current affiliation, but with the harbor temporarily closed for travel and public defenders up to their knees in (fatui) clients, they’d had no choice but to have you take him on as a temporary client.

a gesture of goodwill, lady ningguang had called it. so her majesty knows we gave him a fighting chance in court. our best for her best.

so yes, there was that, and there was the fact that no one else wanted to represent him.

you’re led into the interrogation room, childe moving to pull your chair out for you. “c’mon,” he urges when you hesitate, setting your bag on the table. “i may be a criminal, but my mother taught me my manners.”

you pull out the chair next to it, sitting down and leveling him with a stern look. “pulling out a chair does not cancel out the multiple felonies you’re about to be charged with.”

“please,” he laughs, taking a seat himself when you opt to drag another chair to the table. “you’re giving me way too much credit, babe. i only committed maybe one or two.”

—

“gross negligence, disorderly conduct, destruction of property–”

childe clears his throat loudly, ignoring the glare you send his way. the one that says i told you so.“technically it was lady ningguang that threw the jade chamber at osial, not me. i wasn’t even there.”

the butt of xiao's weapon hitting the floor makes a terrifying sound. that's all it takes to silence the harbinger as ganyu turns the page.

“–desecration, assault, and attempted murder. these are the charges that can be brought against your client by the liyue qixing and the liyue adepti.”

childe pushes out of his seat, slamming his palms onto the table. “attempted murder?”

“please sit down,” you urge, but your attempt to placate him is unsuccessful as he shakes off your hand. “you haven’t been found guilty yet–”

“that makes me sound weak. i got way farther than just an attempt!” he exclaims, ignoring you completely.

“archons, help me,” you mutter, averting your gaze to the heavens for strength. “ganyu,” you interrupt before your client can further incriminate himself, yanking his arm until he sits back down. “could i please have a moment alone with my client?”

“i will give you one minute,” she agrees, but while she turns to leave, xiao remains stubbornly rooted in place.

you smile sweetly at the adeptus. “xiao, if you hear me scream, you can come in here and do whatever you want to him.”

the adeptus chuckles at that (albeit very slightly) as he flashes out of the room, and childe makes an offended noise. "hey, aren’t you my lawyer? you’re supposed to be protecting me!”

your sweet smile immediately drops from your face. “i'm only here because of your right to an attorney, and because almost all of liyue harbor’s public defenders are busy representing your subordinates. ganyu only agreed to meet with us before your arraignment because she owes me a favour, so be nice.”

“well, you’re all wasting your time,” childe shrugs, alarmingly calm for someone in his position. “because i’m a snezhnayan diplomat. i have rights!”

“do you?”

“uh…i think i have rights?”

“you had rights,” you correct sharply. "you forfeited diplomatic immunity the second you decided to commit multiple, very serious criminal offences. so shut up and stop incriminating yourself further so i can do my job.”

“and you could argue that i was just doing mine,” he quips, drumming his fingers against the tabletop. “hey, how long do you think it’d take me to break out of a prison here? ‘cause i’m thinking a week at most.”

cocky bastard.

rubbing your temples, you make a mental note to never agree to represent a fatui harbinger again, even if the pay is as good as it is. “are you really looking to add felony escape to your rap sheet?”

he winks, and you question all your life decisions. “it's only felony escape if i get caught.”

“you will get caught,” you deadpan. “do you seriously think that xiao or the other adepti will let you live if they see you in anyplace but a jail cell?”

“so what? i can fight.”

they might as well convict him now.

you send him one last warning glare as ganyu and xiao return, the latter looking more disgruntled than usual as ganyu says,

“the charges against you have been dropped.”

both you and your client are silent for a moment, because—

“what?”

“holy shit,” childe exhales, nudging your shoulder with his. “you're pretty good.”

you are good, yes, but not this good. “ganyu—”

she holds up a hand. “mr. zhongli sends his regards. you'll be compensated at double your current rate for your time.”

that shuts you up, and the room falls silent at the consultant’s name.

(you wonder if childe knows. it was his purpose, wasn’t it? to draw rex lapis out and steal the gnosis.)

the awkward silence is broken when xiao clears his throat. “while it’s been maintained that the charges be dropped, the qixing and adepti agree that community service and a hefty fine shall suffice in place of a conviction.”

“sounds fair to me,” you agree, because there’s really no better deal than this. you take the contract that the adepti hand you, giving it a quick read before sliding it over to your client. “mr. tartaglia?”

childe simply hands his cuffs to a stunned guard next to him, grinning as he takes the quill from your hand. “where do i sign?”

__________

the relatively peaceful stroll back to your condo is interrupted by the sound of quick footfalls behind you. you don’t have to turn around to know it’s childe, here to make your night even harder.

“don’t you have a community to serve?”

childe bounds up next to you, an annoyingly pretty smile curling on his lips. "can’t i start with taking a pretty lawyer to dinner?”

you hope the heat you feel creeping up your neck stays hidden by your shirt collar. “it’s two in the morning.”

he grins sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "ah, right. how about a drink then? i know the owner at third-round knockout.”

your pace slows as you glance toward chihu rock. the idea of going home to have a nice, long soak in the tub tugged at you, but you could use a strong glass of, well, anything after this absolute shitshow of a week.

“alright, fine,” you agree tiredly (partly because he doesn’t seem like the type to take ‘no’ as an answer). “just one drink, tartaglia, and only if you’re paying.”

_____

childe liked to watch people.

not in that way, mind you. bold and battle-hungry as he may be at times, he had always preferred silence, and by proxy, silent observation. he was never one for the long-game, but sometimes sitting back to watch and listen to those around him simply proved more beneficial. it was fun to see how people reacted to certain things, especially if the catalyst was an event he’d manipulated.

his people-watching made him an expert at reading between the lines to discern one’s true nature. he tries to apply it here, sitting with you. he doesn’t sense anything particularly hostile (other than your understandable passive aggressiveness), but your silence is heavy with distrust, and the slight the crease between your brows is marring your pretty face.

you’re hiding something. or maybe you think you are.

“stop staring at me,” you mutter without so much as a glance in his direction, the corners of your lips downturned as you sip from your glass.

undeterred, childe leans in, amused when you immediately lean away. clearly you have a good sense of self-preservation. “i’m not staring. i’m…gazing.”

“well, stop,” you warn. “it's creepy.”

a grin curls on his lips. “you like it.”

the noncommittal noise you make isn’t a ‘no,’ so childe decides to take that as a win.

“so…” he starts slowly, a finger tracing the rim of his glass. you’ve had three glasses of liquor by now, definitely not enough to warm you up to him, but hopefully enough that you’ll accidentally tell him what he wants to know in an effort to prove him wrong. “how do you know mr. zhongli?”

instead of answering, you immediately pivot with, “how do you know mr. zhongli?”

“work,” he replies with a click of his tongue. “how does a lawyer become acquainted with a funeral parlour consultant?”

“how does a harbinger become acquainted with one?”

the smartass answer would simply be to gesture to himself. death was his business, his trade, his currency— just like a funeral consultant's.

but he has a feeling the smartass answer won’t earn him more than a smack upside the head so instead he settles for, “like i said, work.”

whatever you mutter under your breath is accompanied by a roll of your eyes, so childe guesses it’s an insult. he scoots his seat closer to yours anyway. “you're from around here. what do you know about him?”

“that depends,” you shrug, swirling the amber liquid around in your glass. “i can’t tell you what i know unless you tell me what you know.”

“and i can’t tell you what i know unless you tell me what it is you know."

"hm. then i guess neither of us will know what the other knows.”

childe knows that you know (he doesn’t really, but he has a very strong feeling that you do). he doesn’t even really care if you’ll admit it or not. he just wants to find your line and see what it’ll take to get you to cross it.

which brings him to his next endeavor.

“anyway, are you single? if you are, then great! If you aren’t, i can definitely take ‘em.”

he’s not sure why you choke on your drink like you’re shocked.

“seriously, childe?” you ask, shaking your head slightly.

“why not?” he shrugs, gesturing to his mussed-up hair and scuffed clothes. “are you really saying you wouldn’t take a run at all this, given the chance?”

if looks could kill, you’d definitely be the one being charged with attempted murder. “i wouldn’t even take a walk at it."

something stirs in his frostbitten heart because, archons, you’re mean.

he’s so into it.

“i’ll grow on you eventually,” he assures you, surely almost losing a few fingers as he plays with a strand of your hair. “especially if you come work for me. i’ll double whatever the liyue qixing’s paying.”

he’d get pantalone to sign off on it somehow.

you wrinkle your nose with distaste. “work for the fatui?”

“no, no. you’ll have your hands full with just me. i commit so many felonies that you won’t have to take on another client ever,” he corrects, leaning in until his lips brush your ear. “and honestly? i don’t like to share.”

“not interested,” you say, and he laughs when you shove him away, downing the rest of your drink. “i’ll meet you tomorrow morning to get your community service hours sorted. goodnight, childe.”

all right, you're playing hard to get, childe thinks to himself as he turns back to his drink. but that's okay. the only thing more satisfying to him than catching his prey is the thrill of a good chase.

if you notice him flinch slightly when you pat this hand, you don’t notice, rising from your stool to leave. you can’t leave yet! he hasn’t weakened your defences with his wily charms and roguish good looks. “hey, wait—”

it's embarrassing how long it’d taken him to realize his hand had been stuck to the bar.

frozen to the bar, to be specific. it's even more embarrassing that he hadn’t noticed the cryo vision sitting just above the curve of your ass.

he stares at the ice cocooning his hand in genuine shock and awe. It’s crystal clear, free of any cloudy impurities. he’s from snezhnaya, he knows his ice. “this is— this is hard to do. you’re really good.”

he wonders, briefly, if you’re any good with a blade. he pictures it (fantasizes, actually), but quickly snuffs out the vision because he’s starting to get a little turned on.

but super hot, slightly homicidal guys must not be your type, judging from the way you brush off his compliment and turn on your heel, leaving him with a two-fingered salute.

“see you tomorrow, harbinger.”

he may not be your type right now, but, yeah, he’s definitely gonna change that.

a/n: if you found this on ao3 then congrats! you found my ao3. also if you made it to the end!! pls tell me what u think childe would do for community service in liyue LOL i would love to discuss

"Be cringe be free!"

Are you cool with proshippers? Are you cool with alt art styles? Are you cool with furries? Are you cool with cute 2000s anime without you calling it loli/shota bait? Are you cool with fujoshis/Himejoshis/Fudanshis/Himedanshis? are you cool with-

⊹₊｡˚₊⊹ small girl gets overstimulated on her stepdaddy’s cock !! (3:28)

“d-daddy.. too.. too mu-much- i can’t..!”

“you can princess,” his cock presses deeper into you, the ring of cream on his cock growing thicker and thicker.

he loves urging you on, pushing you over the edge and past your limits. he’s obsessed with the way you arch your back away from his cock, and your desperate whines when he presses you by the divot of your back further into the mattress to hold you still.

he glimpses at the way your face turns to the side with a crying breath; cooing out shushes when he sees how worked up you’re getting on his cock, and swiping your hair behind your ear with a gentle finger to reveal your peachy face, just to examine you closer. he would never want to hurt his precious stepdaughter.

his phone was held up with a tripod that aimed down towards your bodies, capturing the leaky mess that spilled from your cunt and down your thighs. the quality of the film was dark and grainy, but easily catches onto the desperate sobs falling from your swollen lips, and the squelching of your cunt.

“please please please, n-no s’too much.. too..”

“shh, just a little longer princess. make me famous, yeah?”

MEN / MINORS DON'T EVEN THINK OF INTERACTING. 　ྀ̥̊͝ ᭮ 𓏵 ' ✿

“Hey it’s ok… its ok. Let’s just sit down.”

Dad settled you back in his lap, gentle, heavy hands running down your thighs, his palms big enough to cover each of them. He sighed quietly, tilting up a little, and you whined as you felt him press even deeper into your cunt.

You’ve been having lap time like this for awhile. Usually he just rubbed you, one thick finger dragging down the front of your shorts, over your little cock and squishing between your folds through the cloth. He’d get you all wet while he rocked up against you, and then he’d hug you close when he slipped a finger inside and his jeans chafed as he humped harder.

But tonight was different.

It started the same, he offered to watch your favorite show with you, and you crawled up on the couch with him in excitement, but then, after the theme song, he said you were going further tonight. He pulled out his cock—his big adult cock that you had only seen close up when you went pee together—and had you rub against that instead. Without your shorts. And with your underwear pulled to the side, too.

He just had you slide along it for a bit, the TV playing in the background, his slow breathing warm in your ear, and you made the little sounds you always did and your toes curled as your little cock ran along the hard, thick, outside of his. You could see the plump veins twitching beneath his skin, and watched as he reached around to stroke his tip a bit, the foreskin pulling down when he thumbed at it.

But then Dad moved you and rubbed against you himself. It was just like his finger, he said, he was going to press in just the same, and he did, but when he started going, it was so much bigger, too much bigger for a kid like you. And you tried to get up. And he stopped you. And he pulled you back down. And now you could feel his fly scraping against your ass and your hole—young and wet and dripping—was stretched too-wide over his too-big cock.

“There we go honey, isn’t that nice.” Dad’s voice was low, so low and heavy as he nosed into your neck and rolled into you that it almost sounded like a growl. “That’s it. That’s it.”

He didn’t rock much, just kept you there. Hands on your sides, moving slightly but mostly just rubbing over your smooth little tummy, pressing on the bulge there and making you squirm.

It did get better after a bit, especially when his hand slid down to run slowly over your kid parts. Smooth and sticky and steady. You whined again, toes flexing where they couldn’t touch the floor, twitching down onto the girth of him as heat slid down to your ankles. Maybe this wasn’t so bad. Dad keened quietly, fingers pressing flat over the little nub of your cock.

Then, all at once, he hissed and went still, and everything inside became warm. You moaned, all quiet, and he panted in your ear, tensing and untensing as his hand pressed hard over your cock, making it light up and tightening your whole body up hot.

You screwed your eyes shut, hands coming up to grip on one of his arms as your hips ground down of their own volition, confused and fuzzy and desperate to feel more of that thick, pumping, warmth inside you.

When you blinked your eyes open again, there was a bigger bulge in your belly, and your skin felt stretched even further. Dad’s hand ran over your tummy again, pushing ever so slightly, and you felt something hot gush out around his cock. He kept playing with your kiddo parts idly, even though you were tired.

“Go to sleep hun,” he murmured, petting your hair. He was still hard inside, you could feel it. He seemed to wait a moment, letting your breath even out, before one of his rough, wet, fingers left your cock to drag down around your entrance, feeling where you were still connected. He tugged at it a bit, breath stuttering, and the touch made your whole brain buzz.

“Rest baby,” he whispered. “Poppa’s got you.”

Playing Horsey

"Dada!!! I'm so glad you're home!!" Daddy walks through the front door and sets his work stuff down. "Hi baby girl, I missed you today." I jump into his arms so excited to play with Daddy now that he's home. "Dada," I say as I bounce excitedly in his arms, "can we play horsey before Mommy comes home?" I squeeze him tight and kiss all over his face. "Please Daddy please!!!!" I'm continuously bouncing up and down unknowingly grinding on Daddy's jean-clad cock. Daddy holds me still and says, "Did you do all your chores little one?" I nod, "Yes Dada, all my chores are done just like you told me to." He smiles and rubs my wiggling butt. "That's my good girl. Do you know what good girls get, princess? They get rewards." I squeal in excitement, "Thank you, Daddy, I'm so excited!" He puts me down and I anxiously wait for him to sit down so we can start playing.

"Come here princess, come sit on Daddy's lap." I climb onto Daddy's lap and wrap my little arms around Daddy's big shoulders. "Before we start playing I need to check your panties, baby. Lean back into my arms and spread your pretty little legs for me, sweetie." I obey and flip my skirt up so Daddy can see my white cotton panties with a little wet spot in them. "Oh look at you, already wet for Daddy. You're such a good daughter. Alright baby, go ahead and start playing, make your kid parts feel good on Daddy's lap." I start bouncing and grinding on Daddy's lap making my princess parts feel all tingly. I don't know why this happens, but Daddy says that it's supposed to happen when Daddy plays with me. He says it's natural. He cups my boobies through my shirt cooing at me. "You're doing so well princess, don't stop. I'm just gonna take your little shirt off so I can see your pretty little baby tits."

My face goes red as he lifts my shirt. "B-but Daddy, you've never done that before. Is this normal? I don't think that Daddys are supposed to see their daughters without a shirt." He laughs and gropes my little bouncing boobies. "Awwww does this make you embarrassed, sweet girl? It's okay baby, all Daddys should see their little girl's boobies. It's Daddy's right to see all of his baby girl." I look at him skeptical, but Daddy has never done anything bad to me before. "Alright Daddy," I say still half embarrassed at my semi-nude state, "as long as it's what is normal." I continue bouncing on his lap, feeling my panties grow wetter with every bounce. My boobies are being massaged by Daddy. He is pinching my nipples making me squirm as I feel every sting.

I start to feel a warmth grow in my stomach. My legs start to shake and little whimpers spill out of my mouth. "Keep going kiddo, I know you're close. Don't stop playing, let Daddy make you feel good." My whimpers get louder as my panties fill with wetness. "Dada Dada Dada," I yell as I make a wet spot on Daddy's pants, "you make me feel so good Dada, I love playing horsey with you." He pinches my nipples one last time. "You're such a good daughter, baby. Would you like to make Daddy really happy?" I squeeze him tight so excited to be a good girl for Daddy. "Yes Dada, I want to make you so happy." He smiles, "Alright princess, lay down on the couch. That's it! That's my good girl. Now take off those pretty cum filled panties so Daddy can inspect your pretty little baby parts." I hesitate for a second. "Is that normal Daddy? Do other Daddys inspect their daughter's private parts?" "Yes kiddo it's very normal, but it's something private, so don't tell your little friends, okay princess. Now if you want to be extra good, you'll let Daddy put his big adult part inside you." I want to be the best girl for Daddy.

lenkunkauwa!! :3