Dick: Damian, Why Are You So Thoughtful?

Dick: Damian, why are you so thoughtful?

Damian: thinking about how to get revenge on Todd.

Dick [frowning]: for what?

Damian: the bastard gave me a parrot...

Dick: but that's great! I thought you liked animals!

Damian: yes, but he first taught this parrot to say, “Help, I've been turned into a parrot”

[GET REVENGE ON JASON]

More Posts from Dragonboygobrrrrr and Others

4 months ago

Damian is 8 years old when he first comes to live with his father. He’s all harsh glares, standoffish arm folding, and clever barbs aimed at everyone’s vulnerable points. He’s also adorable. Small enough for Bruce to pick up with little to no effort, with big green eyes and baby fat still in his cheeks.

Bruce is overwhelmed with emotions he’s terrible at expressing; shock at the fact that he has a biological child, furious that said child was kept from him for 8 years, devastated that the child was robbed of a normal upbringing and instead raised in a cult of death and devout loyalty to a madman, and overjoyed that this little boy has his nose, his eyebrows, and the same black curls he got from Martha Wayne. He mourns the moments and milestones he’s missed. First steps, first word, potty training, learning to read and write. He doesn’t even know if Damian can ride a bike.

Then, six months into living with Bruce, Damian loses a tooth. A lateral incisor, by the looks of it. Not because of a hit to the face or a Robin-related incident—no, it’s just the natural, logical conclusion to a loose baby tooth Damian hadn’t mentioned having until he bit into an apple at breakfast and pop! Out comes the tooth, stuck to the apple, leaving the boy with a gap just left of center in his smile.

This hasn’t happened since Dick. Jason and Tim had lost all their baby teeth before Bruce took them in, but Dick had been so young. Bruce remembers the angry 9 year old who just wanted revenge marching to the Cave, presenting him with a molar and pouting silently for hours. It had taken a mug of hot chocolate to get him to admit that Mary Grayson always sang him a special song when he lost a baby tooth, to congratulate him for being one step closer to adulthood, but he couldn’t remember all the words and Bruce, my mama’s not here, who do I give my teeth to? What do I do now?

Bruce has no idea what Talia did when Damian lost baby teeth. All he knows is that he’s on his feet and rushing toward the boy and getting his arms around him and—

“Father!” Damian will never admit to the indignant squawk that escapes him when Bruce plucks him from his seat and holds him close. “Are you—“

Bruce settles Damian on his hip with one arm and cards his other hand through the boy’s soft curls. He breathes in the scent of apple shampoo and oatmeal soap while peppering his forehead with kisses.

“I will get you a new pet,” he says softly, resting his cheek atop his son’s head. “A kitten, a puppy, anything you want. Just…let me have this, baby boy.”

Damian instantly stops protesting. He huffs and pouts—which, oh my fucking God, how is he so precious?—as he wraps his arms around his father’s neck.

“That is…acceptable,” he grumbles. Bruce kisses his cheek and smiles into his hair.

That’s how Damian gets Titus.

4 months ago
“After Saving His Tribe From A Bloodthirsty Dragon, Viking Teenager Hiccup Haddock Suddenly Develops
“After Saving His Tribe From A Bloodthirsty Dragon, Viking Teenager Hiccup Haddock Suddenly Develops
“After Saving His Tribe From A Bloodthirsty Dragon, Viking Teenager Hiccup Haddock Suddenly Develops
“After Saving His Tribe From A Bloodthirsty Dragon, Viking Teenager Hiccup Haddock Suddenly Develops
“After Saving His Tribe From A Bloodthirsty Dragon, Viking Teenager Hiccup Haddock Suddenly Develops
“After Saving His Tribe From A Bloodthirsty Dragon, Viking Teenager Hiccup Haddock Suddenly Develops
“After Saving His Tribe From A Bloodthirsty Dragon, Viking Teenager Hiccup Haddock Suddenly Develops

“After saving his Tribe from a bloodthirsty dragon, Viking teenager Hiccup Haddock suddenly develops a reputation that transforms him into the archipelago’s Dragon Whisperer. As he battles other enemies, he soon realizes that there are many others who share his special, high-flying talents. Hiccup must now use his newfound role to battle the evil Viggo, a madman who can open portals to other universes and pull different versions of Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III into our world.”

Yes I created a Dragonverse au. No I’m not sorry.

Wanna add your own AU to the Dragonverse? Tag me in you’re posts if you make any. I will cry.

4 months ago

Dick (Nightwing) and Jason (Robin) stare at Bruce. One sports pleading eyes, the other a shit eating grin. There’s a child between them with black hair and blue eyes.

Bruce, he doesn’t know what’s happening but he doesn’t like it: No.

Dick, grinning: He’s our younger brother now.

Jason, nodding seriously: You’re not gonna take him from us.

Tim, got kidnapped while taking photos of patrol, just happy to be there: Where’s the Batcave?

Bruce: what.

Dick, grinning wider: He’s ours now.

5 months ago

This would 100% happen

CW: so much angst but it’s mainly for villains

Tim had Ana hunt with Bruce who tells him that he’s too young to understand how the world really works, with Jason adding sneakily that he’s also a rich boy who’s never struggled before.

Naturally, Tim takes this as a challenge and decides to help and/or ‘fix’ every villains that he thinks he realistically can.

He goes big straight away with Harley Quinn. He goes to her and pretends to be asking for advice on a friend who’s in an abusive relationship, saying no one else seems to be understanding eh situation but as a score she might. He smoothly describes her and Joker and lets her rant for almost two hours before pulling the rug form under her and saying that Jason forgives his ‘friend’ for him dying by her boyfriend because he knows she was hurt just as bad when she tried to save him.

Harley takes another two months to leave the Joker and places herself in Arkham to contour her role as a doctor for her fellow maniacs.

It takes the help of several doctors but he finds the cure for Freezes wife and hands it over while telling the man that his wife probably won’t forgive him for his various murders.

Freeze understands, saves his wife anyway and accepts her request for a divorce willing, just as long as she stays alive.

He gets Arnold Wesker a real doctor who can better treat his Dissociative Identity Disorder and helps him keep Scarface out of the front by playing along as if rhetorical puppet is real and under heavy custody.

Arnold starts to live for more moments of peace than he has in years, even if there are still some really bad days.

With Poison Ivy he doesn’t actually do anything as Robin, but instead goes to her as Tim Drake and asks for her guidance on how to make his medical company and by association Wayne Industries completely eco friendly and even help to stop climate change. Tim Drake was already borderline political, he might as well lead the charge on action for climate. He does say that if Ivy does any more large scale and fatal attacks he will stop everything, which she agrees to after a week of though with her plants council.

Pamala cries for hours when she sees Tim’s plan to de-plant the entirety of a forest that she had once tried to save.

Tim doesn’t tell his family about any of this until he asks them to visit him in his city office about a gala he wants to hold, his very first, and they find Pamala and Harley helping with decoration plans and Victor and Arnold discussing how their therapy has been going together.

Bruce nearly had a heart attack.

4 months ago

Damian no

Jason: My Traumas, My Jokes

Jason: my traumas, my jokes

5 months ago

AU where bruce and co. (his entire hoarde of kids, even jason in disguise) are at a gala. And it's a really big gala, party of the year type of thing in Gotham, absolutely unmissable. And usually, even the rogues know that this night is off limits, so it's relatively safe. So, they're all at this gala, right?

And then the joker crashes it because he has no respect for Gotham traditions. Breaks in through a window, yada yada. He starts to go on this whole villain speech as per usual, and everyone is waiting for the heroes to come. But all the heroes are at the gala, in their civilian identities, with a thousand eyes on them. No one can reasonably slip away, except for maybe jason, who's already seething mad and ready to attack. But with the chaos and people trying to get away, all the exits are blocked, and his helmet is at home.

Bruce is at the front of the crowd, facing the Joker. Joker sees him and makes a comment about Jason, and goes on about how Bruce must've felt when his baby died. And then he brings up how he killed the little birdie too, just a few days before the terrorist attacks that allegedly killed Jason. And he mentions how much he tortured Robin before his death, and Bruce snaps.

He leaps forward, absolutely hammering the shit out of the joker. Beats him up so bad, no finesse or technique to it, just pure rage. His kids try to pull him off, to no avail. No one else even tries. By the end of it, by the time the police arrive, the joker is more blood than body, and Bruce has finally calmed down. Everyone is just staring at him in shock, understandably. (The joker ends up in hospital, paralysed and in a coma)

His kids all drag Bruce home and give him an entire lecture about his persona and how his cover has probably been blown. About excessive violence and how he refused to kill joker but then pulled this in public?? They're all worried about the fallout in the news the next day.

No one sleeps that night, for various reasons, but then when the newspaper comes out the next morning... there's just nothing bad written?? The headline is something about Bruce being a hero for saving everyone from the joker, but there's no other mention about Batman or anything else.

Turns out, no one in Gotham is surprised that Brucie Wayne, no 1 airhead, beat up the joker because "did you SEE him as a teenager?? We were all just glad when he came from his travels pretending to be stupid instead of picking fights with everyone. If anything, it's understandable that he snapped, I would too if a clown started bragging about killing my son." The only reason no one brought up his violent past is because they were worried he would revert back to that behaviour.

4 months ago
More Train Than Dragon But I Fold, Metro Train From The DC Area Cause Public Transit Is Cool

More train than dragon but I fold, metro train from the DC area cause public transit is cool

4 months ago

Justice League Origin-Swap AU

Roleswap AU, where their powers are the same, but it’s their origin stories that get swapped.

Clark Kent really should have known better than to break into a sketchy biochemistry lab during a thunderstorm, especially with the amount of flagrant OSHA violations.

On war-torn Arcera, Clan Allehnz hires a smuggler to take their youngest chicks to safety, days before the final nuclear exchange.

Sister Diana of the Order of Themyscira is chosen to take on the mantle of a fallen Lady of Justice, and with it, the duty to spread truth and justice to the galaxy.

Hal Jordan, crown prince of the lost city of Oa, falls through the Veil protecting them from outsiders after a dare gone wrong.

Bruce Wayne only discovers that he’s the heir to the Night Court, largest of Gotham’s Fae Courts, after his parents are assassinated by a rival for the Shadowed Throne.

Arthur Curry, only son of a wealthy shipping magnate, uses his inherited wealth, relics and magic to stop evildoers by night and protect the sea and its inhabitants by day.

3 months ago

These look awesome!

I Can Imagine Anything, So I Made Up My Own Continuity Featuring My Fav Autobot Scientists As The Protagonists
I Can Imagine Anything, So I Made Up My Own Continuity Featuring My Fav Autobot Scientists As The Protagonists
I Can Imagine Anything, So I Made Up My Own Continuity Featuring My Fav Autobot Scientists As The Protagonists
I Can Imagine Anything, So I Made Up My Own Continuity Featuring My Fav Autobot Scientists As The Protagonists
I Can Imagine Anything, So I Made Up My Own Continuity Featuring My Fav Autobot Scientists As The Protagonists

I can imagine anything, so I made up my own continuity featuring my fav autobot scientists as the protagonists ! I mostly just wanted my favorite guys to get up to some goofy fun hijinks

6 months ago

Gdjrheuwhdj

I think more people need to play around with Damian's speech. Don't get me wrong, I love the antiquated Victorian child style of speech, but also he's a teenager that swears plenty in the comics. We really need more scenes like:

Damian: Father, I regret to inform you that I have been assigned in-school suspension for the next three days.

Bruce: What, why?!

Damian: My classmate Kevin was disparaging a female classmate for turning him down, so I called him 'a rizz-less, basic-ass neckbeard bitch' and said I was going to fuck his mom and give her a son she'd actually love.

Bruce: *is completely speechless*

Damian: That is all I needed to tell you. If you will excuse me, I have homework to complete before dinner and patrol.

Loading...
End of content
No more pages to load
  • srta-saori
    srta-saori liked this · 2 weeks ago
  • xxdids14xx-blog
    xxdids14xx-blog liked this · 2 weeks ago
  • deepestpersonspyknight
    deepestpersonspyknight liked this · 2 weeks ago
  • a-system-of-nerds
    a-system-of-nerds liked this · 2 weeks ago
  • dyury1237
    dyury1237 liked this · 3 weeks ago
  • ya-boi-oliver
    ya-boi-oliver liked this · 1 month ago
  • queen-of-alagaesia
    queen-of-alagaesia liked this · 1 month ago
  • road-work-ahead123
    road-work-ahead123 liked this · 1 month ago
  • kalb-aglama
    kalb-aglama reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • arogoosey
    arogoosey liked this · 1 month ago
  • syr3n-go-merp
    syr3n-go-merp liked this · 1 month ago
  • famofbatandbird
    famofbatandbird reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • ilikegaydndshit
    ilikegaydndshit liked this · 1 month ago
  • ridiculouspanda33
    ridiculouspanda33 liked this · 1 month ago
  • the-blue-sandglass
    the-blue-sandglass liked this · 1 month ago
  • meloncholyfruits
    meloncholyfruits liked this · 1 month ago
  • serfina10
    serfina10 liked this · 1 month ago
  • lunaluvsu4eva
    lunaluvsu4eva liked this · 1 month ago
  • tired-o-fighter
    tired-o-fighter liked this · 2 months ago
  • heavenlyangeliq
    heavenlyangeliq liked this · 2 months ago
  • ferretwithaknife
    ferretwithaknife liked this · 2 months ago
  • beautifulkryptonitesweets
    beautifulkryptonitesweets liked this · 2 months ago
  • tantufaz
    tantufaz liked this · 2 months ago
  • the-point-is-cool-blog
    the-point-is-cool-blog liked this · 2 months ago
  • girlithinkimgay
    girlithinkimgay liked this · 2 months ago
  • fairynight3
    fairynight3 liked this · 2 months ago
  • hanguangjuns-leftpinkie
    hanguangjuns-leftpinkie liked this · 2 months ago
  • aslannbg
    aslannbg liked this · 2 months ago
  • smellycars4life
    smellycars4life liked this · 2 months ago
  • taty-san
    taty-san liked this · 2 months ago
  • silas-noir
    silas-noir liked this · 2 months ago
  • luvhlee-garden
    luvhlee-garden liked this · 2 months ago
  • anonymous-beeoch
    anonymous-beeoch liked this · 2 months ago
  • kelpeni0
    kelpeni0 liked this · 2 months ago
  • famouscrusadeluminary
    famouscrusadeluminary liked this · 2 months ago
  • cari28ch3-me
    cari28ch3-me liked this · 2 months ago
  • proudace
    proudace liked this · 2 months ago
  • princess-yan-writes
    princess-yan-writes liked this · 2 months ago
  • devotedlyswimmingbird
    devotedlyswimmingbird liked this · 2 months ago
  • ninanoone
    ninanoone liked this · 2 months ago
  • username64738
    username64738 liked this · 2 months ago
  • rushman2-0
    rushman2-0 reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • ioannalala
    ioannalala liked this · 2 months ago
  • heavenfive6
    heavenfive6 liked this · 2 months ago
  • eidolonetchings
    eidolonetchings liked this · 2 months ago
  • norr-ra
    norr-ra liked this · 3 months ago
  • ivorymoons-stuff
    ivorymoons-stuff liked this · 3 months ago
  • rosymaplemothfaerie
    rosymaplemothfaerie liked this · 3 months ago
  • panperiergos
    panperiergos liked this · 3 months ago

473 posts

Explore Tumblr Blog
Search Through Tumblr Tags