Dick's Commitment Issues (?)

I think instead of lame excuses like "Cass is away in Honk Kong" or "[x bat] is doing stuff from his team of heroes" or just ignoring Steph's existance altogether, it would be funny if fanfics took members of the Batfam out of comission by having them have their own fanfic-related cliché adventure

Like, a Jason-centered fic where he asks Alfred where is the replacement and Alfred just goes "oh, Master Timothy has just been possesed by himself from thee-years into the future and is away trying to prevent our horrible deaths" and that's it, Tim is having his own time-travelling fix-it fic in the background which is why he's not mentioned

Babs on a Babs-centric fic where she could really use some advice asking Bruce on comms where her Batgirls are and Bruce non-chalantly answers "Steph has been hit by a love potion and Cass has offered to help her to her apartment", Babs waits a moment and comments "oh... do we get the 'congrats on kissing' banner ready for tomorrow?", "no, I think it's a slow burn, give them a week" and the rest of the fic happens without them

Dick, entering a room and finding Duke "hey, is Damian acting weird this morning or what?" "I think he said something about being stuck on a time-loop until he learns the true meaning of christmas" "aren't we on july?" "Yeah I thought so too but when I asked he mentioned he had already gotten my help on two loops so I just left him be" "well I needed help with a case, you in?" and the rest of the fic is a Dick and Duke team-up

This is how Sonic 3 is gonna open

feeling called out today

credit: _ADWills

Reblog or your mom will die in 928 seconds.

I love my mom.

I am risking nothing

I AM SORRY FOLLOWERS, I LOVE MY MOMMY

Will not risk.

sorry followers :(

do you ever think about how if you dive into the ocean and go deeper and deeper you will pass through layers of darker and darker blue until everything is black and cold and the pressure will be so intense that it will kill you without protection but if you keep going you will find little glowing specks of light, and if you go up into the sky and go higher and higher you will pass through layers of darker and darker blue until everything is black and cold and the pressure will be so intense that it will kill you without protection but if you keep going you will find little glowing specks of light

here’s a silly little prank to pull on your brother 🥰

Nightwing is not a retired crashout. He's just a crashout on hold.

He, like any good eldest sibling with Eldest Daughter Syndrome, is letting all his younger siblings have a turn at crashing out. Anyone with Batman as their parent/parental figure deserves to. It's practically tradition at this point.

Sure, he didn't expect Bruce to keep adopting more and more, but okay fine. He likes having lots of brothers and sisters. He likes being a big brother. Once the flow of new siblings stops and they've all gotten it out of their systems, first chance he gets Nightwing is going to finally allow himself his second run of things. He's just waiting.

Bruce keeps adopting, partially because he can't help it, and partially because he'd rather deal with a dozen regular Bat Children going through the typical teenage rebellion phase than Dick Grayson experiencing a crashout literally years in the making. If he stops adopting he knows what will happen. At this point he's spent too long holding it off to hope the inevitable fallout can be contained.

Teenage Dick Grayson crashing out was bad enough. Adult Dick Grayson has been gearing up more or less for over a decade.

No one will be prepared, except maybe Jason, who has been gleefully waiting for the older brother he remembers to make a comeback since he first showed up as Red Hood, Tim, who is ankle deep into the beginnings of a villain arc at any given moment and spent most of his pre-robin years photographing everything that happened the first time, and Harley Quinn, a licensed psychologist specializing in crazy who has been watching the warning signs build up like an unstable jenga tower for years.

If anyone tries to reanimate Dick, he will require bath toys in his lazarus pit

god I fucking love strawberries