When You Realize You Should Have Picked The Blue Pill And Just Gone Back Into The Matrix..

When you realize you should have picked the blue pill and just gone back into the matrix..

Just Monday Again

My pillow shrieks, "Get out of bed!"

As the alarm clock pounds upon my head.

My boxers squirm down off my hips,

the toothbrush fights to free my lips.

The mirror reflects a neighbors home,

my tube of toothpaste moans and foams.

As the razor shaves holes in all my socks,

the shower jolts me with electric shocks.

Cold cereal explodes my bowl,

while the toaster plots against me.

The jam attacks the jellyroll.

My coffee's dripping honey.

This cologne must really stink,

my milk has turned to curds.

The bathtub quarrels with the sink,

both using spiteful words.

The stove is burning up my clothes,

as the dryer eats the cat.

A fly shoots up into my nose,

the dog chews up my hat.

The refrigerator digests my meals,

the bathtub bitches louder.

My radio lets out a squeal,

as my mouthwash turns to powder.

My hair flies off like autumn leaves,

cold wind blowing cross my head.

Small red car gives a choking wheeze,

as the lifetime battery goes dead.

My pants are squeezing my rear end,

they swear I've put on weight.

My phone has called it's long lost friend,

So I can't tell work I'll be late.

My slippers seem to have a grudge

while they scream that I'm a jerk.

The washer fills my house with suds,

as I shamble off to work.. By Mark Priest

11-12-10