So There’s This Dude I Like

"Got my blood pumping

You know you always draw more blood, I bleed"

Logging onto this website

[SILHOUETTE] John Doe X Reader. Chapter 5 (PT. 1)

Notes: this chapter has some mentions of vulture culture and vomit.

-Damn it Lucas, what the hell is this??!- you said dropping the small jar he handed over to you. Surprised and startled, he quickly grabbed it before it touched the floor. -Y/N be careful!... Dude this costed me a fucking rib and an eye, do you know how hard it was??-.

The order you had made a few nights ago was ready. A protection charm... But this is definitely not what you wanted. Inside of the jar, submerged in a strange liquid surrounded by whatever the hell those things were, maybe plants or something, was a cat eye. You knew about vulture culture and even indulged a bit in it, but it took you by surprise and uneasiness, because you didn't know how this poor creature was obtained. You felt sick.

Almost as if he could read your mind, he looked at you and started speaking. -Look I know you really care about animals so I assure you, he was already sick and died naturally. You know I never sacrifice animals for my spells- he explained. Hearing the explanation put you at ease. You trusted him, and trusted his morals. He would never actually hurt an animal for the sake of a spell, he respected nature.

You stared at him, then at the jar and sighed, -yeah, you're right... Sorry I almost dropped it-. He handed it back over to you, this time you took it carefully into your hands. You still felt uneasy, however, because a small part of you wanted to believe that what he was saying wasn't true, but that's just a stupid intrusive thought, he was no liar.

-...why the cat eye tho?- you curiously asked while putting the jar at the height of your eye to see it closely. It was a blue eye, you could just imagine how beautiful this colour would've looked... If it was still in the cat's socket, that is.

Lucas began to explain, -cats have a special sixth sense, which allows them to sense and warn you about supernatural beings. Not only that, but they can detect negative forces that endanger your balance and well-being-. You nodded your head, taking in the information. -I could've just got a cat then...- -that is an option, yes but I made this jar for you because I know it will help you more than a cat.- he calmly explained. You just nodded your head.

-(y/n) I swear to god if you don't take that shit off of my face I'll throw it outside the window- Faye said, eyes not leaving the road as she drove you both to her house. -Hey don't be rude, I'm just showing you...- you said, putting you jar back between your legs while you kept on staring at it. She had just picked you up from the bazar, turns out she was close and offered you a ride. After a moment of silence, almost as if she was thinking about her words, Faye began to speak, -Look, you know I know you always take the best decisions for yourself... but I think carrying that around is a bit too much. If you don't feel safe, maybe I can spend more time with you, buy pepper spray or something but don't carry around that- you knew what she meant. She didn't like the jar Lucas had made for you, she felt uneasy with you carrying around that thing but after all, she wasn't the one carrying it, she didn't even have to look at it if she didn't want to. You didn't answer to that comment.

Faye wasn't the spiritual type. Sure, she believed in what she saw and what she was told about, if shown proof, but she wasn't the type to believe in spells and magic and stuff. In her mind, even ghosts made more sense than that.

She sensed the silence that followed. Had she been rude? She didn't say anything with ill intent, in fact she just wanted to help you out in a more direct way. -... but hey (y/n), if the jar makes you feel more at ease, maybe you should keep holding onto it- she said, smiling at you. You smiled back.

You've always been particularly good with places. You didn't know the names of the streets but you could point where you were in a map, so you noticed very quickly, that the turn Faye had just taken wasn't the one that lead to her house. You weren't freaked out, you weren't scared, but you were pretty confused so you decided to ask, -Faye? Where are we going?-, it took her a bit of thinking before she calmly answered to your question -I think that you've been too stressed these days. Just last week you claimed your boss had fired you when she hadn't even talked to you and now you're carrying a cat eye...- she sighed before continuing, -a friend of mine is having a party at his house right now. It's gonna be chill, nothing too extra so don't worry, but I want you to get there and just have fun, you know? Maybe get out of your mind for a bit.- This made you tense, you hadn't planned on this, in fact you already had a date with the oh so comfortable couch and chewing ice while watching horror videos or something in Faye's house. You wanted to watch "top 10" videos or that kind of crap, not this. -Faye... I don't know, I'm not sure I wanna talk to anyone else but you right now. Maybe we can go to a party tomorrow?- -dude do you think I get invited to parties everyday? Come on- she said, extending the "on", -It'll be fun! And if you don't feel comfortable, we'll go to my house and have a sleep over, just you and me. What do you say?- ... oh how could you say no to those puppy eyes? -how can I say no to those puppy eyes? Fine, we'll go.- you said, letting her win this time. She smiled in triumph.

You regretted this, you regretted listening to Faye and coming here. The party started just like she promised, there weren't many people and it was all calm, but after a good 30 minutes or so the party started to get bigger. More cars started to park in front of the house, more people with drinks started to arrive and you kind of just sat there, with a beer in your hand as you saw others dancing.

The beer tasted horrible and you were too akward to go dance, no one was happy with this, but going to Faye wasn't an option. Sure, she had told you to tell her the minute you wanted to leave, but you saw her there, surrounded by people and looking like she was having the most fun she had had in weeks. No sleepover with you would have her like this, no sleepover with you would be as fun as this was for her. You didn't feel bad or sad, you just felt lame that you weren't having as much fun as the others.

Of course you knew the implications of parties this big, so people talking to you didn't bother you at this point, and when the second guy in the night approached you, you already had your internal monologue ready. -hey! Do you wanna dance?- he asked, sitting dow beside you, -no thanks, I'm here with a friend- you said politely. -who? Maybe I know the person- he asked. Without thinking it twice, you just let your mouth run, -I'm with Faye- you said, turning up your voice volume so he could hear you well. -oh I know her, she's friends with the owner of this house. But I haven't seen her around you since you arrived- -well for how long have you been watching us?- you asked in a genuine tone, -long enough to notice you haven't been having fun.- you laughed at this, he was right. -beer sucks and I can't dance - you explained, -beer isn't the best choice, you can make yourself a drink, there's vodka, whisky and soda, so you can mix it- he said, pointing at the drinks table. -here, I'll teach you-, he stood up and turned to look at you. You sat there for a second, at that moment, the moment he stood up and turned to you, you felt a chill run up your spine, but it wasn't caused by the man in front of you. You looked around, nothing seemed out of place, everyone was having fun in their own world. Then why did it feel like a hundred eyes were looking at you? Burning on you and your every move. Something told you to sit there, stay there and ignore the man. Not for your own good, but for his.

The hesitance made him unsure, but just as he was about to open his mouth, well...

Fuck it, you were allowed to have fun too, enough with being miserable in the corner. You stood up and smiled at him, -sure, let's go-.

You started with a simple drink as he explained to you why you shouldn't mix alcohols, and just stick to one if you didn't wanna end up on the floor. You were on your third drink now, not enough to get you drunk but enough to give you confidence to start dancing with people. The man you were with laughed at this, how you started shyly sitting in a chair eager to leave and now you were having fun without a worry in the world, it was fun watching you unfold with confidence and turn into a different version of yourself.

He, however, didn't find it funny at all that some jackass was keeping an eye on you. You crearly didn't want to be there, and getting you drunk wasn't for you to have fun, it was for his own benefit. You were smarter than this, so he was surprised when he saw you standing up to go with that man. Oh you didn't have to fit in, you didn't have to go and pretend to be someone you're not and talk with people who didn't even deserve for you to look at. But that's why he was here for, for you, just waiting for the right moment.

Thank god Faye made you go out. You loved her for this, you could go and kiss her right now, in fact where was she?. You hadn't had this much fun in ages! And everyone was being so nice to you. Turns out it wasn't that bad, you were just overthinking stuff. Sure, watching true crime in your best friend's house sounded like a blast, but this? This was by far better than that.

The alcohol had gotten into your brain not too long ago, and you were a completely different person by the time the house was full of guests. You lost sight of Faye, the last time you saw her was when you went up to her and showed her your new friend, whom she already knew, Lucian. All she said was "you're in good hands" before going back to her own thing.

Right now you were learning how to play cups while Lucian was teaching you. -so wherever the ball lands, I have to drink the cup?- you asked, -exactly, now try to throw the ball just how I taught you- he said, placing a small pong ball in your hand. You threw it, the ball hit the border of a cup and flew away from them. Damn you were bad at this. -Don't worry, it takes practice- he said, before placing himself in front of the table and throwing his shot. You let him be, you needed a break.

You sat down, watching as he did his own thing. You were starting to get dizzy, and it was difficult to stand up straight, damn it you shouldn't have mixed alcohols just like Lucian told you...

Everything was starting to become a background noise, and suddenly you grew quiet in order to not babble nonsense. You needed to pee, really bad. You didn't know where the bathroom was but you would figure it out on the way... If you could walk without falling in the first place. You needed Faye, you didn't know for what but you needed her, so you started calling out for her with no answer but weirded out looks.

You couldn't help yourself for too long, and soon you fell to the floor, resting your back in the wall. You were peeing yourself, and not in the figurative way, you could literally feel small drops of pee coming out as your drunk self was desperately trying to hold it in. God you looked so pathetic. Your dress was now wet from when you were trying to pour yourself water earlier but you kept missing the cup, your eyelids were fighting to stay open and you must smell like pee at this point. You couldn't even stand up or even sit down straight anymore. You just hoped people wouldn't look down on you and just ignore you at this point.

...

You had to puke.

Fuck why couldn't your body work with you for once? Now you actually needed to get to a bathroom before you emptied yourself in some random person's wooden floor. You swore this was the last time you would ever listen to Faye. Ok, you can do this, at the count of three. One, Two... -you need any help?- said a familiar high pitched voice in a low, almost worried tone. As you looked up and locked eyes with him, you felt like crying, "god I hope I die and get swallowed by dirt"; alas, you didn't die and get swallowed by earth during those 4 seconds of silence. "Fuck you, God" you thought, as if this was actually anyone else's fault and not yours and your dumbass.

Doe carefully helped you up while you just spluttered apologies.

-I'm so sorry you have to see me like this- -It's no problem, really. I don't mind- he answered. That was a lie, of course it bothered him seeing you like this, in such a bad condition.

He helped you to the bathroom, waited for you outside as he heard you spilling your guts from the other side of the door. You hated this, but not as much as he did, he hated seeing you sick and in discomfort.

He offered you help, you instantly refused saying you could handle this. You couldn't, you preferred to die than to keep feeling this shitty, you just didn't want him to keep an image of you like this in his head; sitting in the bathroom in order to not pee yourself while holding the trashcan in your arms to puke, you must look disgusting.

A few minutes passed before you came out of the bathroom, Doe was still waiting for you as he turned to look at you. You looked back at him,

-I know this is too much to ask, but do you think you could take me home?-

Another animation I did for today!

This is a drawing I made months ago but never really posted. I’m quite proud of it tho so here! :)

no context november. figure it out.

[SILHOUETTE] John Doe X Reader.

So this is a fanfic I've been working on for some months now. Originally published in wattpad, then Ao3, and now I've brought it to Tumblr.

Warnings for this chapter: None.

Enjoy!

The reader is Female presenting.

Prologue and Chapter 1.

You didn't like nor dislike your job. Sure, you liked going out, you liked to be surrounded by different kinds of people and you loved to dress up, even if it was to go to such as simple place, like Walmart. You kinda enjoyed the attention, some people would stop to compliment you, some others looked at you weird but you mostly didn't get bad comments which made you feel good.

However, you stopped dressing up for work after a while... you kinda stopped bothering, tho this didn't stop you from putting on some makeup sometimes, you still liked the feeling.

As a cashier at a gas station, there usually weren't regulars since people just passed by while on a trip and stuff, tho there were some truck drivers who would go through that route frequently because of their job, so their faces were familiar and they knew your name (since it was written on your uniform vest) but you didn't know about them, you weren't very talkative solely because you didn't know how to. Yes, you liked people but at the same time you don't really know how to talk to them and your social battery runs out very easily, so it was kind of an ambiguous feeling towards them.

The place where you worked at wasn't completely desolated...well at least it wasn't at the middle of nowhere, if you walked like 7-10 minutes you could start seeing some houses and there was a subway too, the one that would take you home. So you would usually take your skateboard to walk less and get there faster, besides you really liked the feeling of air against your skin, it just felt good.

Sometimes you wished you weren't the only one working there, so you could get some help in "busy" days (when there were like, 4 people in line at the same time) and so you wouldn't be completely alone, since sometimes you felt kinda awkward when angry customers started fighting with you and there was no one to back you up. It had its perks tho, like you could listen to anything you wanted when there weren't clients, you could sing if you wanted, maybe draw a little or just kill time on your phone... you enjoyed your alone time and you wouldn't be able to if someone else worked there with you, so there's that.

As of now, you were taking some time off school. You graduated high school 4 months ago, and it left you absolutely exhausted; you wanted to take a year off and work in yourself before applying to university.

Today was a lazy day by definition, so much your head was nodding off of your hands while you not so desperately tried to stay awake.

-3 more hours to go...- You said to yourself.

...

You started tapping your fingers on the counter.

...

You groaned, might as well do your actual job.

Since today there weren't many customers, the items were mostly in their place so you didn't need to arrange anything, now the floor on the other hand, looked like a damn crime scene. Some customer had dropped their slushie earlier this morning, and well, the sugar mixed with the already kinda dirty floor just made a mess, besides it had dried up and it was sticky.

Putting on one of your earphones, you start mopping the floor; your arms were getting kinda tired tho, it was hard to clean it up.

Following your figure as you did something as simple as mopping the floor, some people say humans can sense when they're being watched even if it's not directly, yet you couldn't possibly notice the pair of eyes staring at you from outside... nor did you notice the same pair directly looking at you on the subway from home or when you entered the bathroom back at the station to fix yourself up a little.

And even if you started paying attention of your surroundings, you wouldn't notice, not yet... not now, not until HE wanted.

Humming to the tune coming out of your earphone, you didn't even notice when he slowly entered the store and started to check up some items that he didn't even use, didn't even need.

Finishing up you dried the floor, -Shiny as a diamond- you said in a proud manner... you knew it wouldn't last two seconds tho.

Looking up to the ceiling mirror, you noticed someone standing in front of the register. "Shoot, how long has that dude been standing there for?" You thought, quickly walking behind the counter.

-Hi! Good afternoon. Sorry for the wait- you said, beginning to grab the items to scan them, -anything else you need?-... no answer. You looked up at the person in front of you, you could barely make out his face at all, it was hidden under a hoodie and a face mask. You could tell there was long hair there tho, black messy strands popped from underneath.

... still no answer. You began to scan the items one by one.

-That would be 12.40- you said, smiling a little while handing him the bag. He gave you the exact change and grabbed the bag, not saying anything still. You started to organize the cashier, growing a bit nervous of his presence and waiting for him to leave.

-Thanks, (y/n)- he said in a barely audible voice.

This wasn't the first time a client had called you by your name, in fact it was quite common and it never bothered you, but hearing it come out of this person's mouth made you freeze. You didn't even knew what you were doing, you were just grabbing money and putting it back, closing and opening the machine without a purpose. You just didn't wanna look up.

-... yeah, no problem- you said, still not looking up.

Yet this seemed to convince him, since he left afterwards.

30 minutes to close. You were already phoning a friend of yours to see if they could come pick you up, there was no way you'd go back home alone.

End of Prologue. Start of Chapter 1

You were grateful with Faye for going out of her way to pick you up since you knew she was busy with work.

When that red Nissan pulled off in the small parking lot in front of the store, you couldn't help but sigh in relief.

Quickly grabbing your stuff you hurried over towards her car, where she sat down waiting for you with a big smile.

-hey, good looking. What's a beauty like you doing outside at this hour?- she jokingly said lowering her window. -Sorry miss, you look a bit too old for me- you answered heading towards the passenger's door. When you tried to open it, she closed it back smirking. -Hey!- you said, her sudden grasp and pull on the door took you by surprise. You heard how she locked the doors and started the car, -Oh don't worry darling, if you don't wanna get in the car of a senior lady like me, I won't force you to- she said, that smirk never leaving her face as the car started to move backwards. You never doubted her and what she could do, so even tho you knew you both were playing, you decided to grab the handle of the door yet again, not being able to control your laughter -Faye I swear to god!- you said smiling. The car stopped and the door unlocked, -get in before I change my mind, dude-. You quickly got inside and locked the door -yeah sure- you said, throwing your stuff at the backseat.

As always, she kept that playful attitude when you were around, and you couldn't be more grateful to have her as a friend. But even tho she was a very bright person, she also knew when to be serious... like right now. You were telling her about the mess you had to clean up back at the store and how you accidentally spilled juice over you shirt in the morning when she lowered the music on her radio and started to ask -hey, you know I don't mind picking you up whenever you need me to but I couldn't help but notice you sounded... off during the call. Why did you call me over?- your smile faded a little when you remembered that guy. You wanted to keep it to yourself and tell her you were just feeling sick or something in order to not worry her, but it could be dangerous if no one knew about it, so you started to explain her everything.

-he didn't seem dangerous tho, just...very awkward I guess and off-ish? He didn't buy anything strange either- you said, turning on your phone.

-well maybe he's just awkward like that but didn't mean bad? Yet you did make the right choice in calling me over.- Faye said.

-I guess so- you said, scrolling down your phone.

...

-... his voice was kinda cute tho- you said; Faye started laughing her guts out.

-you recover so fast, (y/n)-.

You had invited her to ditch work and stay over to watch some movies, but Faye said her boss had given her a warning, the last warning before she got fired, and she really couldn't afford that. Of course you understood, she had a history of not being good at keeping jobs, and her parents had warned her that if she got fired one more time her allowance would be cutoff.

Waiting until you entered your apartment complex, she drove off.

You threw your stuff at the couch and stretched. You wished you could spend more time with her, like back at high school when either one of you always could be found at the other's house or when you two went out together almost every day. Her parents loved you and it was a pleasure for them for you to hang around their daughter. And even though it didn't occur as frequently now, you still saw them every other week and they still treated you with respect and care.

Today was gonna be a productive night!... at least that's what you said to yourself when you snapped out of your thoughts like 40 minutes ago.

You would make yourself dinner, you would pick up your place, excercise, shower and continue working on your personal project. That was the plan.

You did excercise tho, so that checks out but you couldn't force yourself to stand up and do everything else, so after a while you gave up and just decided to turn on your tv.

Not soon after, you began to be invaded by your own thoughts.

It happened involuntarily, it could occur whenever and wherever, but overthinking was one of your faults, and as annoying as it was, you couldn't help it once it started.

Starting by simple things like "what will I have for breakfast tomorrow", they began to grow and duplicate, making you feel physically sick. What would It be like when you finally entered university?? Would you even? And if you did would you finish? Would you grow to hate you career?... And like that, you suddenly began to question your abilities, a branch of thought that evolved until "embarrasing memories from years ago that probably no one but me remembers and make me cringe". And now to your eyes you were the worst human in the world. This is why you always try to keep your thoughts somewhere else, because if you let them be they turn into daggers and you into a piece of meat.

You gave yourself a slap across the face.

-snap out of it! Oh my god- you said as if you were annoyed at someone else who wasn't you.

You had been working on your trailing and self sabotaging mind once you realised it did you more harm than good, but you were basically trying to force your brain to forget a habit that had accompanied you half of your life so it wouldn't be easy.

Regardless of everything, you had indeed grown as a person after you started to take online classes during highschool, it was only a year and a half but it was more than enough to find yourself and raise your own opinions as well as finding some confidence where there wasn't almost any before. And yet you admitted you still had a long way, but so far it was enough for you.

A feeling that you still couldn't get used to was the feeling of freedom. When you moved out of your parents house and arrived to your apartment... You kinda just... Sat there, on the middle of the floor. You could do anything you wanted now, you could go out whenever you wanted to, you could have a mess and nobody would tell you to pick it up... Things that are so basic for many adults were still new to you and it honestly felt amazing.

So now you were pondering over going outside for no actual reason at 3 in the morning, or staying inside and watch some movies while laying on your cozy comfy couch...

So you were going down the road with your skateboard towards the city. While heading there in subway was obviously the easiest and safest way to arrive, you didn't mind skating a while.

Just carrying your phone and your wallet inside a cross body bag. You didn't actually plan on buying something in specific, but if you did saw something cool you didn't want to miss the chance.

It was a long way there, but you quite literally didn't have anything better to do and besides, you could take the subway back if you got tired so it honestly wasn't much of a fuss.

>>>><<<<

Just as much as you liked nature and it's essence, did you liked the city at night; when there weren't many people but it wasn't completely desolated, it wasn't saturated like at noon yet it was full of life and activities and honestly you weren't much of an observer, you were an interactive person who constantly searched for new activities to have fun. Tho you wouldn't lie, you still enjoyed staying at home and just play videogames or watch whatever.

Being outside helped you ease a bit, distract you from your own thoughts and create any kind of scenarios while walking around while listening to music, it was relaxing.

What wasn't relaxing, however, was the uneasy feeling that invaded you as soon as you entered an alleyway you knew like the palm of your hand. A place, known to you and me as a bazar, where they sold all kinds of stuff, used clothes, toys, haircuts, hell you could even get pierced and buy all kinds of cigarettes there. It was a place that felt familiar to you, and even if many people tended to avoid it, you loved going there in your free time.

But staying on track, it freaked you out, something freaked you out this time and this made you even more scared as of now, a lot of sellers knew about you, they talked to you and whatnot, you were a regular there. And yet, something was off.

If you were to describe this feeling, it was... It was the same you got when that dude back at the gas station said your name. But there's no way that person would be the cause of your distress now, no, of course not the place where you worked at and this bazar were an hour apart and y-

-sorry, hey are you ok?- said softly a young voice. It was Lucas, a vendor you knew too well. He sold esoteric stuff, crystals and all of that, and while you weren't an absolute fanatic of it, you didn't deny it either, you had a thing or two you had bought from him since you knew he took his job seriously and was reliable.

-yeah, don't worry I just... Hey have you felt- -an uneasy vibe? Yes. Look, I don't wanna be rude but I honestly started to feel it as soon as you walked in here, almost as if it was following you... Did you bring someone with you?-, with a mere sentence, you skin froze and your legs got weak, "following me? Following...".

Now, if it were someone else telling you that you'd brush it off, but this was Lucas you're talking about, his whole family has practiced brujería for generations, believer or not, you shouldn't take anything they say lightly, at all.

- no I... I'm alone. Maybe it's just my mind? After all I had somewhat of an unpleasant experience at work earlier on...- you said, truthfully. - No, no - spoke Lucas, - it's not coming from you, it's coming  with you, (y/n)- he said with a worried tone - I wouldn't be saying this if it weren't necessary, you know I don't give any advice or warnings to anyone who hasn't paid for it, but you're a regular here. This thing, whatever it is, doesn't mean harm, but they won't do any good either... I recommend being very careful with who you interact with, (y/n), you're like a magnet for this kind of things -. Now that was new, a magnet? For what? Misfortune perhaps? The phrase "these kind of things" left many opened doors and ambiguous interpretations, but you really didn't want to bother him, since he was giving you for free what he usually charges. Tho you were grateful, you were also scared because what he sensed must've been bad enough that he had to tell you.

It was time to go back home.

- Hey Lucas? Tell me what protection spells or pocket jars you have for me, will you?-

They never fail to back me up 🙏🏼

I hate this fucking world there's so much violence and hatred

hey.. dont cry .. 8 million people on earth , ok ?