I Love Fics That Write The Distortion Genuinely Not Knowing How To Human And Getting Something Egregiously

i love fics that write The Distortion genuinely not knowing How to Human and getting something egregiously incorrect.

i don't mean appearance-wise, i mean silly mistakes. trying to wipe up a spill with printer paper because it misunderstood what a paper towel is. calling an animal by the wrong name.

describing emotions in a door/hallway metaphor. ("hallway full of bees" sorry, did you mean butterflies? distortion, you are experiencing butterflies.)

it was literally a door it doesn't know this shit!

i think it has some memories attached to "who" it is, thus why it can tell michael shelley's story, but little details like this? the nuance of the human experience? lost on it. too busy hating being even remotely like a who to stop and attempt to model after them properly.

this makes it mildly offputting and that's the goal so it's content <3

also @ distortion shippers this entity does not know how to kiss. gerry/jon/melanie/whoever else is gonna have to teach it how because it will just stand there, eyes open and everything, being a door.

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the magnus archives michael d. stortion

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