What Is Nicki Minaj's "anaconda" About?

trying to talk to someone you really admire

action movie about a guy who pretends to be a hitman and does the whole “25% up front and the rest when the job is done” thing but then just keeps the down payment, doesn’t kill anybody, and stops responding to the client’s calls, knowing that they can’t sue him for breach of contract without confessing to trying to hire a hitman. problem is now a lot of people who are comfortable with the concept of paying someone to kill someone else are mad at him

one time I overslept and my mom came into my room to wake me up and said “you had better get up or else you’ll be rushing”. I wanted to say “if I’m rushing then so be it” but since I was still half asleep my mind changed “rushing” to “Russian”, I rolled over and said “if I’m Russian, soviet” and to this day it’s the best joke I’ve ever made

when you keep starting your sentence over and over again because no one is paying attention to you

I don’t want to be on a drug for the rest of my life! I shouldn’t have to need it!

Ryan McHenry, creator of the “Ryan Gosling won’t eat his cereal” vines recently passed away from cancer at the age of 27. Ryan created this vine in his memory. You can donate to a fund to support sarcoma research here.    

HOW TO PICK UP GIRLS IN 3 EASY STEPS

STEP 1: purposefully bump into girl(make sure you are typing into your calculator while doing this)

STEP 2: say “im sorry. i didnt see you, i was taking inventory of all my lizards”

STEP 3: make sure she sees the number 42069666 on the screen