Latest Posts by luckydog251616 - Page 6

LILAC

||This fic will be from Armin’s perspective, then switched to readers perspective! Also be warned, this fic contains dark material and angst, so if you’re uncomfortable with this, then click away, please. Now, read on reader…if you dare!||

Song I listened to while writing

[Armins pov]

“You’re just too good to be true, can’t take my eyes off of you, you’d be like heaven to touch, I want to hold you so much, you’re just to be true, can’t take my eyes off of you…” the record player sang softly as the grandfather clock in the kitchen rang its solemn tune, which indicated that it was noon. I was in a closet, hiding with a scared {name} by my side. I could feel her shaking like a leaf, I’m which I didn’t blame her.

“Oh Armin, you thought you were smart, huh? This really is stupid right! You and I weren’t meant to be together! Come out, come out, wherever you are!” A woman said in a soft but harsh voice. “Oh, where must you both be hiding? Lets make a deal now, shall we? If you show yourself, your precious {name} will be left unharmed. If I do find you both, oh-ho-ho! You don’t want to know what happens then!” She said with a laugh that sounded like a thunderous symphony of storms of rage, anger, and sadness.

“What do we do Armin?! Oh god…” The female next to me whisper-shouted. “I’m gonna die, aren’t I?” She asked, with tears brimming her {eye color} eyes. “No! We won’t die, I promise. I’ll make sure” I whispered, confident, despite how badly I wanted to cry. I couldn’t let her die. Not her. Anyone but her…

The woman’s footsteps grew louder, alongside a sound of a terrifying *click* of the gun held in her hand. Our hearts entered a great crescendo filled with pain and fear. The closet door was slammed open. We were frozen, like statues made of ice, slowly melting in the hot, summer sun.

“Please!” {name shouted} “Don’t hurt him! That is the last thing I want to happen!” She said, hands raised in a surrender. “Please…spare his life. I’d rather it be me than him!” She plead, putting her body in front of mine, creating a shield. “{name}…please….” I pleaded. The woman pointed her gun at her, and I yelped, “Wait! Why are you doing this?!” “Why? Oh Armin, don’t you know? You don’t deserve a woman like her!” She said “You belong with Me! Can’t you see that?” The woman held the gun at {name}’s forehead. “Any last words? I’m feeling nice today” she said with a spine-chilling smile. “Armin, just know that I love you.” She looked at Armin with a sad, but reassuring smile, before turning to the woman and saying with great venom in her voice, “And I hope you rot in hell” her eyes darkened.

[{name}’s pov]

The last thing I saw was a smiling woman with her finger on the trigger. Everyone entered a slow motion, a previous frozen Armin ran to me, but before I could react, I heard a loud bang. I then felt a huge wave of pain, and collapsed. “{name}!!” He cried out, rushing to my side. His tears made my shirt wet, his hands now covered in my blood, trying to stop the bleeding. “Please don’t die on me! I can’t lose you, please” his pleaded with pain in his voice. “It should’ve been m-“ before he could finish, I kissed him. “Don’t cry, Armin. It doesn’t suit you” I said with a small smile before feeling a sharp pain.

I reached out slowly and wiped away his tears with my thumb, which caused more tears to come out. I then saw him get up from my side and walk towards the woman. “Armin…” I gasped before coughing into my hand. “Fuck…” I mumbled, seeing red blood on my hand. “Armin, what are you doing?” I said in a raspy voice. How was I still alive? I didn’t know. He managed to grab the gun from the woman and pointed it at her. A chilling wind entered the room, the curtains danced and the moonlight showed the outline of the woman. Before he could do anything, she looked at him. The last thing I saw were a pair of blue eyes looking back at me with a glare, before she ran out the door.

“Did you see who it was?” Armin asked. “I have an idea on who it is…” I responded. “Okay, I’m going to get some help first, you can tell me later, alright?” I nodded before he went and got some help. After a few hours, I felt my heart rate slowly fade. Doctors rushed to my side, trying to revive me. “The person…who shot me…was A-“ before I could finish, my eyes closed and everything stopped.

[The next day, Armins pov.]

I had been woken up to the news that she died. “Wait…she…died? No she couldn’t…she’s a strong girl she-“ I was told she died and that it was confirmed. I then broke out into sobs. The rest of the day, I was silent. Everyone had known about what happened and rumors started to spread. Who had done it? Well, the answer, {name} did know, and the rest is pretty much history.

|| End note: Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed…well, I hope you were happy with what I wrote! It’s not really happy either. But hey! I’m glad you read this! I almost cried writing this during English haha 😎 Anyways, take care yall!

-Lucky 🐾||

I’m gonna post a random(ish) fanfic that I thought of! It’s gonna be angsty and very interesting! I’m going to post it sometime today ^^ be on the lookout!

-Lucky🐾

As an Armin kinnie and an armin simp, I wonder how that would work if Armin and I were in a relationship…

-Lucky🐾

ANYONE WHO SEES THIS SPREAD THE WORD AND REBLOG THIS.

I’ve seen a lot of posts on my dash tonight about users who are threatening suicide, with other Tumblr members posting in effort to try to get ahold of them. I think you all should see this:

IF THERE IS EVER A TUMBLR USER WHO HAS POSTED A GOOD-BYE MESSAGE, SUICIDE NOTE, VIDEO, OR ANYTHING OF THE SORT, PLEASE FOLLOW THIS POST.

1. Scroll to the top of your dashboard.

2. See the circular question mark icon at the top? It’s the third one over from your home symbol. Click on that, and a screen similar to the one in the picture will come up.

3. Where you can type in questions, the box with the magnifying glass at the top, type in the word “suicide.”

4. Click on the first link that shows up. It should say, “Pass the URL of the blog on to us.”

5. Type in the user’s URL and tell Tumblr admin that the user is contemplating suicide and has posted a message indicating that they are going through with it or will be attempting. Hit send! Tumblr administration will perform a number of actions to contact the user and take the necessary steps to prevent the suicide.

TUMBLR: THIS COULD SAVE A USER’S LIFE. PLEASE DO NOT IGNORE SUICIDE THREATS.

Reblog this to keep other users aware. Suicide isn’t a joke, and neither is someone’s life. If you didn’t know this, someone else may not, either. Pass it on.

Chapter 4: Yes or yes

||I said I’d make a new chapter, so here it is! This one may end up being on the shorter side since it’s late but I’m experiencing a huge burst of energy haha! Also I really love this song because, vibes 😎 Anyways, enjoy the chapter and look out on Friday! (Also just in time for Valentines Day)||

[Restaurant. Thursday, 5:00 pm. {name}’s pov]

“What I’m going to say next might sound silly…but…I-“ I got cut off with the sound of Levi saying “We’re going to leave as soon as I pay for the meal. We need to prepare for the concert and get ready.” We all hummed in response. “I’ll tell you after the concert, alright?”. Jean responded with a nod and we left after Levi paid.

The car ride to the hotel was silent, other than the radio that played a song. The song “Yes or yes” by Twice played. I smiled and sang along, and I got surprised looks from everyone but Armin. I continued to sing along, a smile on my face. Once the song ended, I was greeted by the surprise from the members of the group. “I didn’t know you could sing so well!” Jean said, acting like a child in a candy store.

“Thanks” I said with a smile. “I told you she could sing well” Armin said in a teasing voice. “You should sing with us some day. As a guest” Eren suggested. “I…I’m not sure I can sing THAT well, but I’ll consider it” I said with a shrug. “It doesn’t hurt to try!” Connie said, with an encouraging smile. “Like I said, I’ll consider it” I said in a teasing voice as we entered the parking lot for the hotel.

[The concert. Thursday, 10:00 pm, Jeans pov]

Crowds singing. Dance. Sing. Lights, flashing. Sound. Lots of sound. Why? Why must I feel so warm inside?? I mean, dancing causes that, but…it’s a different kind of warmth. One that I haven’t felt in an long time…

While dancing and singing on the stage, I couldn’t help but feel nervous, despite me looking all happy (and serious when called for) on stage. I mean, it’s normal to feel nervous around your crush? Right? Or is it perhaps more than a crush? Perhaps, it’s this feeling of love I’m feeling…

I took a quick glance to where {name} was and I saw her smiling, looking super happy, the lanyard around her neck following her movements, entranced by the way a snake would be by a snake-charmer. Seeing her all happy motivated me to continue to dance, despite me being on the brink of collapse. Do it for her, make her proud. You can collapse later, just not right now…mows definitely not a good time.

Once the concert ended, we were greeted by a happy {name}, saying loads of praises on how good we were singing, her favorite parts, and a “You are all so talented and amazing! I loved the part when-“ while she continued to spout praises and her excitement on being backstage, I fell a bit more deeper for her. Once we were in the green room, {name}, Connie, and Eren were trying to convince her to sing onstage (with Levi listening and commenting once in a while), while I was talking to Armin.

“I see you have feeling for someone” he teased. “Is it that obvious?” I asked, my voice low. “Nope, I can just happen to read people that well. You might have what people call Aitai ga jou, mitai ga yamai.” “Eh?! No I don’t” I said, crossing my arms. “Yeah, sure. Uso o tsuite iru koto ga wakarimasu” He said with a smile and he gently nudged my arm. I sighed, “Īdeshou, tabun”

[Hotel balcony. Thursday, 11:00 pm, {name}’s pov]

I stood on the balcony, watching the sky above glitter with stars, sparkling and shining like tiny flashlights, the moon giving off a soft glow, contrast to the darkness night brought. I heard the sliding glass door open and close. “Hello there Jean.” I said with a smile. Jean responded with a hello. I looked up at the sky…I’m going to do it, tonight is the perfect night! You got this…

“The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?” I asked before I looked at Jean, smiling softly.

“I can die happy” He responded smiling back. “How did you know?” I asked, smiling with a blush on my face. “Armin told me in case” he said with a small laugh. Our faces grew a few inches closer, the wind bringing in a whisper, a conscience asking, is this right? Is this wrong? But in the moment…it felt so right… I closed my eyes and our lips touched, at first slightly awkward, then it slowly bloomed into something I didn’t want end.

|| Translation (rough, may not be entirely correct but it’s close enough 😅):

“Aitai ga jou, mitai ga yamai.” - love sickness

“Uso o tsuite iru koto ga wakarimasu” - I can tell you’re lying (basically)

“Ideshou tabun” - Okay, maybe

Also! The phrase “The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?” Which is a Japanese phrase (“tsuki ga kirei desu ne?”) where one confesses their love to. Well, if you want to be cheesy, that is. The least unrealistic response (the one I decided to use) is “I can die happy” or “shindemo iiwa”

The most realistic response (which I’m deciding to include here) is “Sōda ne 〜. Tokorode daiji daijina hanashi hanashi ga aru tte gen ittenakatta? Nani nani?” Which roughly means, “Yep. Isn’t there something important you would want to tell me?”

The responses on the internet can be rather false and incorrect 😅

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this “mini chapter” and have a great Valentine’s Day ❤️

-Lucky 🐾

|| Taglist: @1-800-asuka

im going to play this later heh 😎

˗ˏˋ HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY! ´ˎ˗

I've been working on this project for over three weeks and now I'm very proud to announce it's complete and ready to be published! Welcome to my first ever interactive fanfiction <3

♡ WHAT'S AN INTERACTIVE FANFICTION?

Very similar to your casual visual novel, interactive fanfiction is very similar to a choose your own adventure game! After reading for a while, you will be prompted with two or more different options. For example, you can choose to side with Eren, Armin or Mikasa during a conversation, and, in another opportunity, you can choose between staying in Zeke's car while he finds a parking spot or heading to the fast-food place with Porco and Pieck!

Aside from that, you can customize the game even further! You can add your own name/nickname, so the characters' interaction feels even more personal. No pronouns are used throughout the story either <3

♡ OHH, TELL ME A BIT MORE!

11 available endings: Eren, Mikasa, Armin, Reiner, Bertholdt, Annie, Zeke, Pieck and Porco

2 Bad Endings

The reader is gender-neutral (no pronouns are used throughout the story) and racially ambiguous (no "raking their fingers across your hair" or "pink blushes")

Option to add your name/nickname so the characters can talk with you!

You can unlock secret passages when choosing different interactions with a character. And yes, those secret passages include even more kisses <3

♡ WHERE CAN I PLAY IT?

You can play for free on itch.io but of course, my ko-fi is always open if you're feeling generous. However, it's important to let you all know the game will always remain free and without any ads <3

I hope you enjoy playing it! Let me know what ending you got <3 Feel free to reblog so more people can know about this! c:

Happy Valentine’s Day to my reader, followers, and everyone in between! Ily guys ❤️ -Lucky 🐾

I’m releasing the next chapter for Red lights tomorrow because

1. It’s kind of late where I live and I need to sleep heh

2. I feel like it’s appropriate to release it on Valentines day *cough cough nudge nudge* (since it’s tomorrow, where I live)

Be on the lookout!

-Lucky🐾

I felt like creating a playlist (aka master list) for each chapter (with the prologue) on here! So here we go! Note: I know I should’ve done this ages ago, but I’m going to edit the previous chapters and add the song it originated from (so you can listen to it while reading or re-reading ^^) ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : Stray kids (Bang Chan, Hyunjin) - ‘Red lights‘

2:15──────|─── 3:43

ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▯▯▯ ◁◁ ▐ ▌ ▷▷

Prologue

Chapter 1: from home

Chapter 2: Maria

Chapter 3: The 7th Sense

Chapter 4: Yes or Yes

Chapter 3: The 7th Sense

|| Hello and welcome back to another chapter! I’m sorry it took a while for the chapter to come out, my life is a bit of a mess at the moment 😅 Anyways, plot-wise, Things will start to get interesting from here on out! Without a further ado, let’s continue our story now, shall we? ||

[Hotel room. 8:00 am, Thursday, {name}’s pov]

I woke up to the sound of someone snoring. Well, more like someones. As my eyes adjusted, I noticed the sleeping, snoring figure next to me. I shifted to get into a more comfortable position and then noticed how warm I felt. That man was like a heater, which was nice, considering how cold it was outside. It wasn’t until a few minutes later where I recognized the figure as Jean.

I quietly exited the bed, careful not to wake him up, as he seemed rather peaceful. I entered the kitchen and stretched a bit, before cooking some eggs. As the pan heated up, I saw Levi enter first. “Good morning Levi” I say with a smile. He hummed in response before he made some coffee. As more people walked in with sleepy faces, the more eggs and bacon I cooked, which I didn’t mind it at all.

After breakfast, I cleaned up the dishes ,along with the help of Levi, and got ready for the day. The schedule included a trip to the stadium to check the sound before the show. I sat on a couch and put in my earbuds, and decided to listen to music. I started to humming along. “I know that song! It’s (song name) isn’t it?” I almost flew out of the sofa “Shit! Armin, you scared me!” I said in fake anger. I then laughed, thinking my reaction was pretty funny.

“I’m so sorry!” Armin said, looking somewhat nervous. ”You’re good! Also, to answer your question, it was (song name)! How did you know?” I asked, raising an eyebrow. “I just happened to hear it on the radio a few days ago! It’s such a good song” he said with a smile. “It is“ I said with a smile and a nod. I looked around the room, Jean was sitting across from where I was, reading a magazine. The cover had a random actress smiling foe the camera.

[Hotel room. Thursday, 10:00 am. Jean’s pov]

Sitting across from a crush, listening in on a conversation. Sounds like a cheesy scenario from a romantic k-drama to me. I flip a page and continue to “read”. At least, act like I’m reading. I take a quick glance at the girl and then look at the words. A few moments after, their conversation which when from a song to preforming on stage, Levi entered the room.

“We have to go to the venue for sound check and after that, we’ll have lunch. How does that sound?” Levi asked. “Sounds good. What do you say Jean and {name}?” Armin asked us. “I might as well tag along” {name} said with a smile. I swear her smile could light up a thousand lightbulbs. “If everyone else is okay with it, then I am as well” I said with a nod. “Sounds good then. Get ready everyone” Levi exclaimed before grabbing his essentials.

[Venue. Thursday, 12:00 am. Jean’s pov]

After an hour of doing sound check, we decided to take a break. {name} was watching on the left side of the stage, looking quite happy. She seemed like she was enjoying the tour so far, and I was as well. I heard her humming along to the songs that we sang, and hearing her voice made me fall a bit more harder for her.

“You should sing more often” I told her during the few minute break we had. {name} looked at me like I was crazy. “Huh? Really? I don’t sing that we-“ I cut her off before she finished her statement “You’re an amazing singer! Don’t doubt yourself! I really…uh…love…yoouuuur voice!” I say with a sheepish smile.

“You love my voice? I uh…thanks!” She returned the smile and blushed quite a bit. Levi then called us over to continue to practice.

[Venue. Thursday, 12:20 am. {name}’s pov]

Watching them dance was nice but…did Jean literally just confessed his love for me? I then realized. Eh, couldn’t be possible! How could someone as great as him, as amazing as him, love me? I blinked and continued to watch them sing and dance from the wings.

Maybe I do love him. This must be what love feels like…right? This warm, fuzzy feeling? Maybe I’m overthinking again. But…this couldn’t be just a simple schoolgirl crush…right? I wondered and then thought of many different scenarios. After a few more songs, they decided that they were done rehearsing.

During the restaurant, we exchanged glances. I remember staring at Jean a bit too long and he looked at me. I stared at my food, and continued to eat. Eren and Armin were chatting about lights and stuff, while Levi chatted to Connie about the future for the group. I then exhaled, deciding to give it a shot. Better late than never…right? “Uh, Jean? I would like to ask…er…more like tell you something…” I said, looking around at the fairly empty restaurant. “Sure, go ahead! I’m all ears” Jean said, looking at me and listening to what I had to say. “I…how am I supposed to say this?” I said with a nervous laugh and a sigh.

“What I’m going to say next might sound silly…but…”

||Cliffhanger! Yay! I hoped you like this chapter! I sincerely apologize for the delay 😅 No need to wait to long for the next chapter, as one will be released tomorrow! (since I feel bad and I’m bored a lot haha). Idk how many times I blushed writing this smh. Anyways, take care of yourself and make sure to drink plenty of water!

Lucky🐾||

Taglist: @1-800-asuka

when you get this you have to answer with 5 things u like about yourself, publicly. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool) ♡

Lemme think….

1. I love my brain, because when it comes to creativity I’m pretty good at it haha

2. I also like my personality, even thought I have flaws, I’m still a nice person ^^

3. I like my taste because I have nice taste (shows, food, etc)

5. I also like my “can-do” attitude and I try to complete my projects :)

Sorry that I havent posted a new chapter yet for red lights, I’m currently have been feeling demotivated for a while, and I’m trying to power through this hehe. I will try to release a chapter tomorrow as soon as I’m done with my duties (so to speak) ^^ sorry again for the delay 😅

-Lucky 🐾

Mine is super pretty! One of my dreams is to see the northern lights in real life ^^ I’m actually really proud of mine hehe

- Lucky🐾

tag: open ^^

new ask game! : go on this link, search up your birth date and show us the picture nasa took on that day. here’s mine

tagging: @sakusaww @mxtchalilies @astralwaifu @solaxena @21-06-1996 @suckerforsugawara @suniken @c0ld-soba @perruvianily @oikawascutie @duckymcdoorknob @rinoomi @meqgumis @tobibam @jak-of-the-trade @heyhoneyybunn @sapphicshav @zeninsso @sukxma @sadarminnoises + anyone else who wants to join in

no pressure tho !

Also the one with the Armin pfp is me ^^ I revealed myself not even a week later hehe 😅 anyways, the song I was listening to is 7th sense by NCT and the plot I thought of was like reader writing in a notebook the English translation of the song lyrics and Kaeya reads it (they’re in a relationship btw…or we’re in this case) and he gets like a flashback to when they were fighting and how his s/o met their demise. Yeah…a n g s t. I personally love angst hehe

-G

I think I found a new favorite song o-o. It fuels my need to already write angst T_T. I took the "were" to heart here and made it more angsty U-U.

A reincarnation to modern-day Au (kinda?)

Warnings: Only Kaeya remembers the past U-U. Angst, language, minor violence (medium???), angst, it got long, uh... Kaeya is written to how I imagine he is under the flirty persona. so, talk of putting oneself down... depression? suicidal thoughts? idk put that there just in case-

Kaeya x Reader Angst

“Open your eyes”

Kaeya was used to seeing you around, his chest afloat but heavy at once. It was you, yet it was not. With such differences between you then and now. Each stroke of your pen caught the attention of his eyes. His eyes, which had been scanning his textbooks while you were supposed to be working yourself, now focused on the letters of your pen. His head tilted slightly as he watched. The earphones laying within your ears must be playing a song you enjoyed, perhaps on repeat? He hadn’t seen you look… so like you once had before. His eyes caught the words, slowly reading them, suddenly struck with an ache in his chest.

His eyes faded into the distance as he fought to stay present with you, here in this library… but ever since he’d been small, he knew you, or at least the you he’d known at some point.

His eyes glanced around, complete loss of control, stuck within the memory. His vision was always so different here than what he’d grown up with… with only a single eye to see, the other covered, it was to be expected. He hated being able to feel the light warmth of the sun. He hated every bit of this world. He felt… cold, bitter cold like he was in an eternal freezer, trapped in ice. He’d seen moments of sweet comfort that left him with a bitter tang in his mouth… never seen answers to why he felt… cold. He knew that in both lives he’d been taken in by the same family, only here he did not get along with his elder brother… but here there was a version of you who saw him as more than a simple friend.

His lips moved without his permission, calling out your name with a sweet tone he’d never have the confidence to speak to you with. “Y/n, where are you off to so early? Yet another commission? Has Master Jean asked you to go take things on your own again? Don’t you get lonely traveling on these long commissions? Come on, stay a little long Y/n, you only just got back… can’t this wait? We were going to drink silly today.” He hummed walking close to your side, wrapping his arms about your waist, filling you with his abnormally cold temperature. He watched you shiver with a small chuckle.

“Kaeya, I’m actually doing a small favor for your- er for Master Diluc. It’s not much, he’s busy aiding the traveler today, so I promised I'd take care of some meddling Fatui. He’ll join me himself when he finishes helping the Honorary Knight. It’s not a harbinger, so it’s something I can handle on my own.” You turned in his embrace, lifting yourself to land a peck to his lips. That cold feeling warmed with the contact, his cheeks heating as he chuckled against his will. His mind screaming, a different yell than his usual memories that surfaced… Those tended to tell him he was safe, that this was not real, and not to get lost in this past life. The voice inside his head was screaming for him to wake up, that he shouldn’t remember… that if he did, he may never recover.

“Oh? Look at you, not long ago the traveler and I were teaching you to wield your weapon the right way, teaching you to use that God’s eye… yet, here you are all mature now. It’s so… pleasing, but I wish you had never grown into your skills… as selfish as that is.” Kaeya pressed his lips to your forehead, running his fingers through your hair.

“I never said you couldn’t come along, silly captain.” Your laugh… ah how much his heart fluttered with that sound. Why couldn't you, the present self, make such noises? Why did you never laugh like that with him? Had he not tried to court you right this life? Had he been wrong to use the same tactics he used in that past life? What changed, was it not remembering yourself, or were you simply their lookalike? No… There were times where you did what they had done, acted so similar he had to stop and question if it were another scene meant to torment him.

“Then I shall accompany you, my dear.” He let go of your waist, motioning with a bow for you to lead them away.

A mistake… to not talk you from this commission… he was realizing that.

Wake up…

Before it happens… again… right there… wake up… forget… forget… don’t remember… I don't want to see it… no… please let me snap back to the world… notice… notice the distant look… suck me home… please… forget… Kaeya…. Forget… don’t look…

It was the first time he saw the power he had in that life. Ice flinging from his sword or even his hands from mere flicks of his fingers… and you were no dead-weight yourself. Strong elemental energy coming in bursts as you fight. Even with the unexpected ambush of the Fatui agents, more than initially expected. Anger in their eyes as they swore curses, Kaeya struck with skilled mercy, aiming not to kill despite having complete ability several times to do so. Enemies fell, knocked out, dropping to their knees and surrendering. The chest at the end seemed a pleasant reward if the two of you ever managed to clear the enemies around.

“What the fuck… they’re everywhere.”

“Look at you, cursing like a true knight under frustrating conditions. You’re truly amazing, my angel!” Kaeya called out as he drove ice in a circle around himself, catching Fatui, who backed up to avoid being slashed in half by the sharp form of his capabilities.

Behind you… move… damn it… movie Kaeya… stop it… pay attention… sense it… why couldn’t you see it… why… why… Why them? Couldn’t it have been you? Traitor, monster… worthless scum… just pay more attention to the fallen enemies… not all… no…

The sound of their voice, the moments slowing as they did that day… despite his pleas at the memory to stop progressing or to change the events, he couldn’t do anything. Stuck watching the mistakes of the moment catch up to him again. Their body jumped in front of his back… “KAEYA!” The holler of their name as their blade moved to block, missing… they missed… leaving that small opening… their blade slipped… they couldn’t block it…

No… stop it… stop showing this… forget… forget… open your eyes, quietly just open your eyes, look out and open your eyes… open your eyes…. Open your damn eyes… don’t look…

No matter what he chanted internally, he couldn't change the memory…

Wake me up…

He didn’t wake… he stayed trapped as he dropped to catch your slumping form. The ice he’d been so careful not to use lethally showed no restraint… impaled over and over… that agent who dared hurt you fell gurgling on crimson as his eye glared dark shades of black. Darker black than an angered harbinger… a darker aura than a god who’d been angered… nothing could compare to the feelings he had forgotten…

How long ago had it been since he felt this much pain?

He lived in it.

He lived with the regrets of watching his adoptive father die, his birth father, abandoning him to infiltrate Mondstadt… he hadn’t felt this much… furry since that night… when his life had changed from a peaceful childhood in a palace… to a wandering boy who had no home. The remaining Fatui attempted to flee, seeming to sense his current state… of the masses, only a handful made it out… alive… none without injury. “Y/n… please don’t close your eyes… don’t try moving though, don’t talk… I'll do something… let me just… Can I freeze it? Ah no, that could make it worse… the church… but if I move you… fuck!”

“Kaeya… am I?” he shook his head, grabbing your hand as you stared at him with… terror… you were terrified… truly terrified.

“No! You’re just a little hurt… nothing that can't be fixed at the cathedral. Just let me...” He paused, feeling the hand in his go suddenly limp before you rolled on your side, lungs gasping as blood… as blood seeped from your lips…

“Kaeya…”

“N-no… listen, don’t waste energy… I can get you help…”

“Kaeya… it’s bad…”

“… please don’t go…”

He was never vulnerable… not the way he was now… not to the point he was ready to plead and beg... to shove pride up his ass.

“If we ever meet… in a new life… let's fall in love again.” You coughed between your words before reaching his covered eye. He let you remove it, staring at you with both eyes.

He’d never seen the world this way… not in his memories… he saw in the reflection of ice why he covered that eye. “Y/n…” he started before your lips shook. Breath coming off in a puff of white smoke… one… last… time… Kaeya took a few moments to comprehend what just happened. Your hand hitting the floor in slow motion… It was quick, but so drawn out to him. His hands moved to your shoulders…

Tap…

Tap…

Tap…

Shift..

Shift..

Shift..

Shove,

Shove,

Shove,

Shake-

Shake-

Shake-

“Y/n?”

“y/n?”

“Y/n?”

“This isn’t funny?”

“Open your eyes, look out, open your eyes…”

“Please?”

“Stop joking…”

The slightest movement from the unconscious members he’d let live resulted in their demise… his emotions controlling him as he leaned over and belted… his voice rattling the freezing caves… any moisture freezing as he shook your body with more force than he’d ever use to wake you from a nightmare.

Can I wake up now? Please… I don't want to keep remembering this… he thought to himself as he observed the mess he created… even his tears fell like ice crystals…

He didn’t register the sound of fire breaking ice, melting it, only to see it freeze again. He didn’t care if the person saw the splatters of blood from Fatui… didn’t care if they called him a monster…

He failed… worthless… he couldn’t keep anything that he loved… everything slipped by his fingers.

His home

His only relative

His adoptive father… who was more a father than his birth father.

On the same day, his brother… because he wanted Diluc to kill him… he had felt guilty for feeling relieved Crepus died, not knowing his secret…

And now... He’s lost the only person who promised to stick by him till they saw peace… and to become a married couple and raise kids after peace set in.

Was this worth it? The pain? Were the moments of freedom worth this? Yes… he thought… they were. To see that smile and hear your voice… It was worth it to feel loved.

“Kaeya?” He knew that voice… ah so Diluc did come… too bad he’s… late. Just like Kaeya was when their… when Diluc’s father died… he forgot sometimes… that Diluc no longer thought of him as a brother… he never said our father… always my father this and that…

“You were right… you always are Diluc...” He didn’t mean to sound so defeated… and broken. Oh… Diluc knows about the eye… he’s never seen it… best he keeps it closed… unless… would Diluc perhaps be disgusted enough to… kill him?

“Kaeya… what-” he seemed to almost gag. Kaeya heard it. Must be the obnoxiously gory scene… the ice was… melting… ah so he was calming down? No, Diluc’s pyro… it’s the stronger element against cryo… pyro melts cryo…

“I really am everything you think. I am Diluc… a worthless traitor… scum.” He wasn’t making sense… at least now that he was thinking from a viewpoint that didn’t feel what this past self felt… he seemed overly dramatic… “I couldn't… it was my fault… I should have seen it… sensed it. I’m a captain… a knight of Favonius. We really are worthless… I can’t live up to you… you’ve always been… better than me… I wonder… had she gone with you… she’d probably be alive.” What had he been on to think this way?

“Kaeya? Move… let me see.'' He didn’t budge, but he didn’t fight or try to cling to the dead body as Diluc melted the ice before him. His eyes stared for so long before looking at Kaeya… “what happened… Kaeya”

“You don’t care… So why should I elaborate… they're dead… I lost it and… killed them in return… you wanted to do the same when… your father died.” Diluc stood as tall as he could at that small note. Kaeya never called him like that… even when Diluc shouted that Crepus was not their father, only his… Kaeya rolled his eyes and stubbornly called him their father.

He felt guilty? This was… his commission, but there were no more than three when he’d been asked to handle this situation… Where did the others come from?

Diluc had to… it must have been his older brother instincts kicking in, but he picked the younger lad into his arms and, despite the burning cold against the heat of his body, he placed Keys in the light. His eyes… they had a sparkle, didn’t they? Why were they… dull… duller than a masterless vision? Why was Kaeya simply letting things happen?

Why am I still living this out? Why am I not awake yet? Kaeya hissed within his mind, hating the pain that welded into his brain, traveling down to his chest. Diluc’s hands removed the blood-stained fur and garments, before wrapping Kaeya in a jacket… oh this is… Diluc’s coat? Kaeya’s eyes moved for a moment to stare at the fabric that wrapped him. He watched Diluc turn back to the icy cave.

It was his first reaction since Diluc had moved him from their body… his hand reached out, grabbing pathetically at the older male's pants leg. He felt so small… like a child grasping an adult… perhaps because in his mind… Diluc would always be his big brother. “Please… don’t… go.” Diluc had never seen Kaeya like this… not since they were little… long before the knights…Diluc kneeled…

He set their foreheads together, letting his feeling about that night fade… he’d implemented that thought into his head… the one that made Kaeya think he had no worth… and they… his lover… had helped him find himself… find that he did, in fact, have worth outside being a tool for others. “It’s okay… I’m going to clean up, but I won't… I'm not going to leave you again.”

Kaeya let him leave… it felt like ages before Diluc pulled out the body, carrying them in his hands… Kaeya leaped from his spot to their body, tapping them again… “Kaeya they're...”

“Not yet… not… they just need to open their eyes Diluc… why can’t I have this one thing?” Maybe he should stop talking? He said things when he got emotional… like that night… so compelled to spill everything because of the guilt… he was so vulnerable to his emotions… he was a smooth talker because he had to be… If he started to talk about himself, he would lose himself within the words… his emotions led him to do stupid things… and those things never go well…

If he was able to reason he would have stopped there without venting to the man he shouldn't be able to trust… considering that fight they had and the numerous verbal quarrels they had each day. “I never get the things I want… home… gone… abandoned… But I don't mind… I was taken in only to lose that family to… Because I’m nothing but a weapon… a stupid tool… a useless one though. Guess the gods really do forsake me… don’t you think Di-” His eyes shot wide when he was… hugged? Diluc… holding him? Pressing his head to his chest? Was he high, drunk? Was he dead and dreaming?

“Shhh, just… it’s okay to cry Kaeya… It’s alright to cry… I...” Diluc seemed to pause in his words… Was he about to see he wasn’t being himself? Was he about to shove him away again? That’s what Diluc would do? Diluc hates him, right? “Your big brother is here… and your big brother isn’t going to leave you to suffer alone anymore… don’t go saying things like you're about to… about to drive that sword through your body…” he sobbed, not that echo of a scream that he’d felt watching you die… but a genuine cry that hadn’t left his lips in years. He finally gripped tightly onto Diluc’s shirt, knowing his tears would stain the white collared shirt… his brother wore.

He didn’t register anything else… nor did he remember

His eyes opened quietly. “Kaeya?” he snapped to look at you, voice caught in his throat. “You scared me there! You were zoning out worse than usual… I know you tend to have spells where your mind is elsewhere, but you… were crying silently and kept moving like you wanted to wake from whatever it was… I shook you, but you didn’t snap back like you usually do...” He smiled as if nothing had played in his head.

“My bad… I apologize for worrying you.” He picked his book up, staring at it… he couldn’t focus anymore… maybe he’d talk to somebody… mostly Diluc, who seemed to also remember that past life… less than he did but he could understand Kaeya… at least to some point.

“Kaeya… I… oh gods help me… this is so not a good time, but I know I won't get the courage to ask you again, but… would you… maybe wanna go to… some sort of restaurant… just us?”

“Like a date?” he smiled, leaning over the table to stare into your eyes. Watching you blush and chuckle… oh how his heart did a little dance at that sound… a sound he’d only heard in those memories till now.

“Yeah… like… a date.”

“Then, I’ll pick you up at about seven tomorrow.” He rubbed your head before setting his book down and grabbing his bag.

“Kaeya… one last thing… it doesn't make sense… and if it’s weird I’m sorry if I uh… just don’t pay it mind if you don’t get it okay?” He raised a brow, two eyes, the same shade, color, and shape staring at you. “If we ever meet in a new life… let's fall in love again.”

A tear slipped unwillingly from his eye… pausing to make sure he heard you correctly. “I… keep my promises, my angle.”

“I’m sorry that I don’t remember any of our happy moments from then, but… I really did fall in love with you Kaeya… this you… not the man who called out to me as I watched myself die on loop for years at night with nothing but those words.” Kaeya smiled, kissing your forehead…

“We’ll make new memories.”

“Yeah… and we’ll be happy.”

“Yes… happy.”

And he was… he was happy knowing you loved him, would laugh and smile like you always did.

Imagine having writers block, couldn’t be me 😭

-Lucky 🐾

Reblog this to give the person you reblogged from a heart shaped cookie

It’s safe to say that I’ll be fine hehe 😎

tag: free one! Anyone can join ^^

starting a game bcz i'm bored :

the last three ppl in your camera roll are the ones you'd be in a zombie apocalypse with.

here's mine :

we're all dying, esp this mister in the middle and on the right ⤴⤴

tagging ( yes you're obliged to do this and stop this from flopping /hj ) : @uxavity @fallintodream @bubble-bootie @solaxena @discountkiyoko + anyone else tbh

^^

Please Reblog is Your Blog is Safe for Non-Binary People.

If my mutuals can’t rb this then we can’t be mutuals

THIS IS SO IMPORTANT Please for the love of gif c r e a t e your o w n goddamn work! If you aren’t able to, at least send an ask so you can repost elsewhere! or at least give credit when credit is due! Like I said before, I don’t get mad easily, but when it comes to shit like this, it pisses me off. As a writer, it’s hard to create work. Like to produce a chapter for red lights takes me literally a week! It’s hard, and I feel for you tbh! It’s very rewarding when you get recognition, but when someone plagarizes, it’s just demotivating. I personally have never experienced this myself, but I can imagine the emotions you’re going through rn. People! Please don’t plagiarize, and also, technically speaking, plagiarism is a criminal offense. To save yourself and others this trouble, I repeat MAKE YOUR OWN WORK OR AT LEAST GIVE CREDIT IN SOME WAY

Thank you for listening to my soapbox rant ^^ - Lucky🐾

please reblog or interact with this post ! ❗

you know what annoys me the most about being a writer? and writing everything in a virtual public place like tumblr?

plagiarism.

and y'know what piss me off the most about it? it's not the first time, probably won't be the last either.

today, through a person that i don't feel entitled to expose the @ 'cause i really don't know if they want to be exposed this way, it came to my attention that this person (of the following account) on wattpad - as usual - has been plagiarizing some of my works, especially from the tokyo revengers fandom.

and, in case the person comes to see this post because they probably follow me, i wanted to make it clear that: it's plagiarism from the moment you CLAIM A WORK THAT IS NOT YOURS AS YOURS. and that's exactly what you did.

you didn't ask for permission, you DID NOT EVEN SEND A FUCKING ASK.

and y'know what pisses me off the most? is the fact that I have FUCKING EVIDENED IN MY FUCKING PINNED that i don't want anyone reposting or copying what i write on 'cause, goddamn it, all the works you reposted on wattpad took me over FUCKING THREE HOURS TO FINISH.

The piece with the haitani brothers as yokais made me stay up in the wee hours of the morning just proofreading it. And the one with pen pal!mikey made me unable to eat properly FOR FIVE HOURS because I wanted to finish writing soon.

And, in case you see this post, I wanted to make it very clear: don't apologize to me. Don't have the audacity to apologize to me, because I'm sure that if someone hadn't come to tell me about this discrepancy and lack of prior communication, you wouldn't have come to do it either.

Next time you plagiarize someone or try to repost without permission something that doesn't belong to you, at least be smarter and try to hide it better.

Also, don't try to come in my DM or by asks asking me to let you repost, 'cause:

1. You should have done this before and if you consume what I post here, you are obviously not a kiddo or a dumb fucking teenager who doesn't understand what 'Don't repost without permission' means.

2. You posted on Wattpad as IF THEY WERE YOURS WORKS, you had the fucking audacity to do that.

and, for every person who ends up seeing this post, please report the works of this person. i don't even know if most of my followers have wattpad accounts or something like this, but, if some of y'all do, please, report them.

i'll be putting links and all here.

all the works of my tokyo revengers masterlist.

all the works of my jjk masterlist.

and to the people who might come to tell me that i should have kept everything between a convo with me and the person: don't fuck with me, if the person follows me, they KNOW that they were never allowed to repost anything.

and a final saying for the person who reposted everything w/o permission: do me a favor and delete everything, if you see this. but, if you don't see this, i don't care that much since I'll probably have people reporting all these things. <3

I LOVE THIS FIC A LOT DEFINITELY RECOMMEND Its very angsty tho so fair warning heh

There’s no freedom in love

pairing: Eren x Reader (romantic) , Hange x Reader (platonic), Armin x Reader (platonic)

genre: A mixture of angst and fluff

wc: 1.5 k

synopsis: Reader helps Hange with their experiments with Eren’s Titan form. She now has the chance to get closer to and see a different side of the boy she holds so dear. Hange is a tease and there are a lot of frustrations that come from unshared feelings.(Includes Hange being roasted by Moblit)

You were curious about really anything and everyone certainly knew that.

When Armin started to ramble on and on about the wonders of the world outside the walls, the stars in your eyes shone like pools of light. Could out there be something as great as ‘the ocean’?

“…a salt lake so big, that no merchant could deplete it. Not even in a lifetime! Isn’t that wonderful, y/n?” the blonde would ask you with a strange, addictive hope in his eyes.

“It really is! Wouldn’t that mean, however, that there’s land somewhere beyond the ocean?”

“I think there’s even more than that! There's flaming water, land made of ice, and fields of san spread wide!”

“…do you think that there are titans there?” That was a question that kept you up at night, that crept into your thoughts and never left, pounding in your ears anytime you went out for ODM gear training or when you simply went to sleep, in your bed next to Sasha’s.

“Even if there are… I’ll kill them all. Every single one of them, until we are free.” grunted Eren, joining your conversation he overheard, an evident tone of anger in his voice. His green bright eyes were glowing with such a passion and verve that you couldn’t help but get lost in them. And suddenly all the voices became background noise as your gaze fixated on the brown haired boy.

You were curious about anything, but always kept an objective attitude. Always realistic and blunt, but still, at your core, a dreamer.

That’s why Levi put you under Hange’s care, or, more precisely, gave you the order to keep an eye on them. Soon enough though, the excitement you once had washed over you and left behind a long trail of anxiety and fear.

For who would be the fear? You can’t really say since it’s divided between Hange and Eren. Both too reckless to actually see around them, one able to turn into a titan and the other obsessed with those beings - you and Moblit placed to make sure they wouldn’t drop dead of exhaustion or another failed experiment.

The whole day felt like it was flying around you, just slightly out of your direction. From the early morning to the eve of night, you had to run around after your squad leader, a pencil and lots of paper to make sure you had the chance to sketch Eren’s titan form from all the points of view.

“It’s a necessary material for future activities! We need to hurry! MOBLIT, Y/N! DID YOU SEE THAT!? WRITE IT DOWN, WRITE IT DOWN!” At this point all you could hear were their screams.

But then again, you’d glance at the male, now turned titan and couldn’t help thinking ‘What a doomed life… To love somebody capable of this, somebody whose freedom is bound to the thing he hates most…”

It wasn’t really pity, it was a strange feeling of longing, a burning desire to take his hand and run away, from all the experiments and obligations, from all the walls and the scouts full of expectations…

“-/n…y/n… Y/N!” the loud voice of Hange broke your train of thought. “Are you still in there? What were you so interested about in his face?” they got closer to you with a smug expression, silently demanding a response.

“I-I think it’s getting late and he should need some rest.” you ultimately mumbled, too flushed and nervous to think of something else. “After all, we want him alive tomorrow…”

“…Right…” Hange narrowed her eyes with suspicion. Truth is she noticed long ago your little “affinity” for the green eyed titan shifter and tried the entire time to pair you two for experiments - in a world that’s slowly crumbling to pieces, what wrong could a little love do?

“All right then, I see, I see…. I guess we could wrap up for today. Moblit, do you have everything?”

“Yes, Hange-san.” The male had visibly large eye bags from the countless sleepless nights spent putting up with the Squad Leader’s imprevisible and eager persona.

“Let’s get going then. Y/n! Finish up with Eren, would you?” Hange screamed at you while being dragged away, smirking despite their tiredness.

“Hangeee stop teasing them” Moblit sighed. “But-“ “No ‘Buts’, let’s go give you a shower.” “ I don’t need one” “You reek”…

Their voices got lost in the distance as you made your way to the titan, launching your ODM gear towards him and gently landing on his shoulder.

Eren looked mindlessly at the night sky. The moon, round and full of light, was shining softly, confined by the sea of stars and the bright blue and green light that crossed the night like a river. It gave him a sort of peacefulness he craved, a slight feeling of the freedom he fought so hard for…

His train of thought was stopped by the feather-light sensation of someone landing on him. Even though he got used to this by now, anytime you were the one to do it, he couldn’t help but jolt, just barely, and turn away his gaze. He silent thanks whatever heavens there are that you couldn’t see the blush on his face everytime you got so close to him.

Holding on a piece of his hair you got closer to him, which made the titan turn his head, the same ever-so-green eyes watching you closely.

“Eren, it’s time to go, we’re over for tonight.”

A part of him wished the experiments would never end, not when you focused all your attention on him, although the other part just wanted to catch a good few hours of sleep. But how could he want to go to sleep when all he wanted to do is be next to you?

With a rough and deep grunt, the titan’s head dropped, steam coming out of his mouth and ears. From his nape, in a shower of scorching vapor, the boy you loved so deeply rised, slightly leaned back with his head falling behind and closed eyes. As he tried to separate himself from the titan’s muscles, you couldn’t help but stare at how effortlessly beautiful he was.

Who would have thought that Eren, the boy who just a few months ago was so clueless about the world around him, moving forward with his strong, self-established idea of freedom, would turn out to be so open and considerate with the others and with his new-found power, so vulnerable to the world around him?

His gaze snapped you out of your thoughts and although the silence was a bit awkward, you managed to speak first.

“We should go, … it’s getting late” Such a dumb thing to say, you thought. From the million things to tell him you choose this?

Eren nodded, eyes still locked on your face. He was attracted to you like a moth to the light and truth is, in the past weeks, when everything seemed to horribly go down, you became one for him. A reason to fight for and a dream of you two finally being together and free to live a peaceful life.

He wishes he told you something, anything and can’t help but mentally curse at himself for being a coward who couldn’t express his feelings for you.

You held your hand out for him and pulled him out completely out of the titan’s flesh that was slowly evaporating. Holding him closely to your body, pressing your hands on his waist tightly, you took off and landed on the ground. Eren was still clinging to you, trying to memorise your touch, the way your body stiffened and slightly trembled under his hands - a wish in his head to keep you forever like this.

“Eren…” you said softly looking at the boy besides you, taking in the way his titan marks framed the emerald of his eyes.

“…Y/ - /N…” His face got closer by the moment, the space between you two filled with the cold breeze of night and the promise of something more…

Just as your lips were about to touch, you stopped in your tracks with your forehead almost pressed to Eren’s.

“I’m … sorry… if today was too much…” you managed to say, hating yourself for this. How could you deny this boy’s closeness? The hurt in his eyes hit right through your heart.

“Don’t worry about me” he tried to smile through the pain and pressure in his chest, before pulling away and starting to walk, only to be stopped by your arms around his chest and your head cradled in his neck. Only a hug, yet his entire heart caught fire.

Truth is, this simple embrace was better than nothing , especially in this troubled times. How could any of you risk falling in love when you could easily lose the other?

I’m bored so I’m creating a goal for this account ^^ ok so like: people do prompts. I would love to do them but I don’t have a lot of followers to do so. Here’s my idea: I will do one of those prompt events (I don’t think it works like this but I guess I’m built different 😎) if I get to my first milestone of 100 followers! I know it sounds like a lot, but I believe it’s possible! (Also it’s not mandatory for y’all to follow me, I’m mostly posting this as a sort of reminder for myself lol, but follows and reblogs are appreciated :) ) then I will host the event! I already have an idea for it ^^ Anyways, take care out there and keep your eyes peeled on Friday for the usual fanfic chapter release! - Lucky🐾 (Edited)

I have never because I’m to nice. Also if you send hate, at least have the balls to do it off anon 😭

Reblog if you honestly have NEVER sent anon hate.

It pains me that only 14,000 people can honestly reblog this

Happy Lunar New Year everyone! 🧧If you celebrate it (even if you don’t), then I hope you have a day full best wishes and good intentions for the new year! I’m so happy to have met so many people and I hope to meet more! 🐯

- Lucky 🐾

IMPORTANT!! PLEASE REBLOG THIS AND SPREAD THE WORD! I know I don’t have a lot of viewers bit a little goes a long way! I want to make sure no one else ends up clicking on the link and ends up seeing this! (I lets have not but just for measures). I dont get mad easily, it takes a lot and right now, but if the person that send that link sees this, i mean this in the nice way, screw you and please don’t do this again ❤️

As a stranger on the internet (who probably sounds like a mom), stay safe out there and be very careful! Try not to click on suspicious links/links you don’t recognize and please report anything suspicious! No one should have to go through that :( Enough with my rambling, take care out there folks! - Lucky 🐾

Warning to writers and Anons

Hello, recently I was sent a very disturbing anonymous ask containing only one thing; a link. It wasn't a link to any shady website, it was a Facebook watch link to CCTV footage of a neighborhood street. Now, I won't upload the link here because of the contents, but please, if you are triggered in any way by violent animal death, please do not search for this video. Mutuals, readers, and anyone with anonymous asks on, please be aware because that video was gruesome and heartbreaking.

To anons, please don't send disturbing content like this anonymously. I already tacked down the anon that sent me this link, I know your IP address and which internet cafe you used to send me this, I will not hesitate to contact your region's authorities and the internet cafe itself, seeing as sending these kinds of content is illegal in your country. Please reblog this to spread the word, be safe everyone.

My sister has to do a book report and I’m doing it for her. Kinda contemplating whether I should do the light novel for BSD or if I should do no longer human by Osamu Dazai. She’s in 8th grade, middle school

Warm bread. You agree. Reblog

Golden Mikey 🧎‍♀️

REBLOG golden mikey for good luck ✨

idk lol dis statue just radiates good luck,,,, let see if something happens

Tumblers not letting me comment so I’ll have to do it this way :/ Anyways, yay! Looking foreword to doing it with you! ^^

I was thinking that we could do different scenarios for 9inty-9ine. Like what I’m doing for Jean, we could do like different tropes for each character. An example would be Armin being friends to lovers or something like that ^^ I just thought of this on my walk lol. Let me know if you’re down to doing it (I know you have your hands full but I wanted to share this concept hehe)

-G

omg, im totally down!! tysm for the idea ! <3333

I know I don’t have a big platform, but I hope this reaches the right person at the right time :) (if anyone needs to rant about anything at all, my dm’s are always open, I’ll gladly stop whatever I’m doing and lend an ear :) )

Ok so this post is extremely long and I put it all together for my blogs Feeling sad page but as I don’t have a huge amount of followers I realize so many people are not seeing this information so I’m posting it here too!

alternatives without harming yourself:

holding/squeezing ice.

splashing your face with water.

getting a rubber band and snapping it against your skin (this could hurt, though it’s better than other ways that people usually choose to self-harm).

take a hot shower or bath.

eat something sour. it will take your mind of the urge. (lemon, sour lollies)

massage where you want to self-harm.

get a red pen or red paint and draw/paint over where you usually self-harm.

remind yourself as to why you shouldn’t do it. (scars, harms organs, leave memories etc…)

describe what you are feeling. (is the urge/pain in your chest, fists, legs, arms, head).

killing yourself will not help. it is not a solution.

you have your whole life ahead of you. you have so many more years that you can accomplish things in. for example;

having a family.

getting married.

to watch the sun rise.

to watch the sun set.

to save someone else’s life.

finish school.

get your dream job.

to laugh.

to smile.

to go camping.

travel to new places.

to wake up every morning to the person you love.

friends.

family.

to keep that promise you made.

to accomplish a goal.

to meet your idol.

to listen to new music.

theme parks.

video games.

chocolate.

to be able to look back and say “i made it”.

what you’re going through is temporary.

in case you need to hear this:

you are loved.

you are wanted.

you are needed.

you are beautiful.

you are handsome.

you are important.

you are not alone.

you are okay.

you are strong.

you are worth it.

you are smart.

you are not a failure.

you are useful.

you are going to be okay.

———————————————————————————————————

abuse

coping

caring for yourself

domestic abuse

chat rooms

survivors chat

fort refuge

pandy’s

add/adhd

coping

coping tips for attention deficit disorder

12 best tips for coping with adhd

50 tips on the management of adult attention deficit

medication

adhd medication chart: compare drugs for add and adhd

drugs used to treat adhd/add

add/adhd medications: are adhd drugs right for you

adhd medication side effects, drug types, precautions

addiction

coping and recovery

tools of recovery: addiction coping skills

5 ways to deal with urges and cravings

after rehab: 5 ways for addicts to cope

addiction recovery

coping with urges

dealing with cravings

anger

coping

strategies to keep anger at bay

anger management: 10 tips to tame your temper

anger management: tips and techniques

feeling angry

controlling anger — before it controls you

dealing with anger

how to cope with anger

anger management: what works and what doesn’t

ten commandments of anger regulation

anxiety

coping

a list of stress relievers

identifying and managing anxiety

11 assorted anxiety tips for anxiety sufferers

how to work through feelings of isolation

tips and tricks for dealing with anxiety

anti-stress breathing tips

how to stay under control with severe social anxiety

coping with social anxiety

managing stress

how to help a friend with anxiety

help guide (therapy)

half of us

job interviews and social anxiety

dealing with anxiety

coping with test anxiety

tips for flying anxiety

grounding techniques

more grounding techniques

even more grounding techniques

mindfulness

belly breathing

living with anxiety

social anxiety disorder self help tips.

coping with flashbacks

what anxious racing thoughts are like for me

using a thought diary

panic attacks

how to handle panic attacks

exploring and coping with panic attacks

10 rules for coping with anxiety and panic

tips to cope with panic attacks

rules for coping with anxiety and panic

understanding and coping with panic attacks

understanding and helping panic attacks and panic disorders

help guide (panic attacks & panic disorder)

coping with panic attacks workbook

rules for coping with panic

panic attack workbook 2

medication

help guide (anxiety medicine)

common medications for anxiety disorders

guidelines for medication use

bipolar disorder

coping

bipolar disorder and self-help

living with bipolar disorder

how to deal with bipolar disorder without medication

10 ways to cope with bipolar disorder

coping skills

help guide (self help)

bipolar support tumblr

medication

help guide (bipolar disorder medication guide)

help guide (treatment)

chat rooms

healthfulchat

bipolar world

healing well

depression

coping

how to cope with depression

how to cope with depression 1

natural depression treatments

ways to deal with depression/stress

tips to help overcome loneliness

10 tips on how to work through feelings of social isolation

8 tips to overcome loneliness

ways to deal with depression/stress

having a bad day?

make a comfort box

10 things to do when you feel like crap

how to find a new normal in the middle of depression

you are not alone in the way you think you are

reasons to stay alive

how to stop trying to think yourself into happiness and actually arrive there

cheer me up

help guide (dealing with depression)

help guide (helping someone with depression)

medication

what to expect with antidepressants

finding the right anti-depressant

chat room

healthfulchat

healing well

eating disorders

recovery

281 reasons to recover

eating disorders and emotional eating test

relapse prevention

bloating, indigestion, & feeling too full

why you must eat

learning to love your body

tips to stop restricting

dealing with weight gain

10 steps to bulimia recovery workbook

coping with exercise addiction

tips to help with bulimia recovery

help guide (emotional eating)

help guide (binge eating)

help guide (bulimia)

help guide (helping someone with an eating disorder)

help guide (treatment and recovery)

stop hating your body

body positive zone

self care 101

self esteem

30 day self esteem challenge

developing positive self esteem

learning-to-love-yourself

something fishy

ways of coping with eating disordered behaviors

the addiction help center

friends with illness

how to deal/talk with bipolar and depressed people

what to do when your friend is talking about suicide

what to do if someone you know is overdosing

what to do if your friend is hurting themselves

how to help someone who is suicidal

here’s what you tell someone who wants to commit suicide

tips for looking after someone with depression

friends with metal illness?

what to do when someone is suicidal

help guide (helping someone with depression)

grief and loss

help guide (coping with a breakup or divorce)

help guide (coping with grief & loss)

help guide (coping with pet loss)

help guide (supporting a grieving person)

help guide (the five stages of grief)

ocd

coping and treatment

natural treatment options

treatments for obsessive-compulsive disorder (ocd)

additional treatment options for ocd

residential treatment for ocd

medications for obsessive-compulsive disorder (ocd)

a new relationship to your obsessions

how to find help for ocd

ocd: exposure therapy versus medication

cognitive therapy for ocd

chat rooms

healthfulchat

ocd-uk

perfectionism

coping

how to overcome perfectionism

learn to manage perfectionism

how to overcome perfectionism & procrastination

perfectionism - stress management

10 steps to conquer perfectionism

perfectionists coping with failure

ptsd

coping

coping with flashbacks

self help strategies for ptsd

coping with traumatic stress reactions

post-traumatic stress - self-help guide

understanding and coping with ptsd

coping with ptsd

schizophrenia

coping

living with schizophrenia

coping with schizophrenia

schizophrenia coping and recovery

schizophrenia: coping with delusions and hallucinations

paranoid schizophrenia coping and support

treatment

an introduction to the treatment of schizophrenia

treatment of schizophrenia

drugs to treat schizophrenia

common drugs and medications to treat schizophrenia

treating schizophrenia successfully

self-harm

cut something that’s not real skin

half of us

help guide

recover your life

self-injury outreach & support

how to care for cuts

resisting cutting

25 ways to avoid self injury and prevent self harm

tips to help stop cutting

99 coping skills: things to do instead of cutting

what to do when someone sees

how to fade/cover scars

alternatives for cutting 1

alternatives for cutting 2

alternatives for cutting 3

alternatives for cutting 4

alternatives for cutting 5

self-love

how to stop putting yourself down

self confidence

how to improve your self-esteem

how to be ok with yourself

tips on self-love

confidence

learn to love yourself

when told you are not pretty

emergency compliment

lessons for self-love

suicide

coping with suicidal thought

what to do when someone is suicidal

how to help someone who is suicidal

here’s what you tell someone who wants to commit suicide

help guide (suicide prevention)

help guide (dealing with suicidal thoughts & feelings)

therapy

how to get free therapy

getting a therapist - a brief step-by-step

psychiatrist, psychologist, therapist or counsellor?

50 signs of good therapy

50 warning signs of questionable therapy

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the quiet place

things to do when you feel bad

when you’re not having a good day

reminders

self care suggestions

take a break

the thoughts room

90 second relaxation

the dawn room

the comfort spot

control a rainstorm

calm

how to make changes in your life

imalive

crisischat

7 cups of tea

kids help phone

positive love network

trans lifeline: 877-565-8860

depression hotline: 1-630-482-9696

suicide hotline: 1-800-784-8433

lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

trevor project: 1-866-488-7386

sexuality support: 1-800-246-7743

eating disorders hotline: 1-847-831-3438

rape and sexual assault: 1-800-656-4673

grief support: 1-650-321-5272

runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

exhale: after abortion hotline/pro-voice: 1-866-439-4253

9inety-9ine winter Headcanons!! I am just feeling fluffy today so yeah ^^

❄️ Armin loves to make hot chocolate during the wintertime, being wrapped in a soft blanket in front of a fire with a book is his dream (same Armin, same *sigh* oh to read a book with Armin 😭)

❄️ Jean and Connie love making snowmen and gingerbread houses! Levi would watch and give them advice on how to make sure their houses stay up, they almost always fall at least once :(

❄️ Levi likes to look out the window and watch the snowfall. He finds it peaceful and very beautiful, seeing it fall from the sky :)

❄️ Eren loves to go snowboarding, the speed and the cool tricks he has learned to do is fun! He has been doing it for a long time and he just enjoys it! He loves the feeling of the adrenaline rush! He likes to go on those diamond Slopes (which are very steep, make people avoid them heh)

❄️ As a group, they would enjoy watching those hallmark movies and make fun of them lol (everyone but Levi, he’s just shaking his head at how cheesy it all is) while snacking on some popcorn 😎

Tag list: @1-800-asuka