Via NYPost: Immigration And Customs Enforcement Is Preparing To Launch A “big F–king Operation”

i saw this image and immediately thought of them.Please tell me nobody has done this already LOL (。-∀-)

Odysseus is best dad

Okay this is kinda a stupid thought I had once I got over the craziness of Odysseus.

All the like middle aged men are dead cuz of the war except for the weak and cowardly

And now Odysseus has killed all the suitors which was basically all the younger men of Ithaca. Plus some faraway princes and such

So in doing that he basically made Telemachus the most eligible bachelor in all of Ithaca and the neighboring kingdom.

His first day as a dad and he’s already wingmaning his son

I agree

I have not seen Wicked and everything I know about that movie is by dashboard contagion but if I go watch that it and that pink and green wanda and cosmo lookin women don't end up together at the end I'm gonna be so disappointed in you guys

Zeus after making Odysseus drop a baby off the wall of Troy, obliterating the remaining 42 men of his crew, and beating the living shit out of his own daughter:

I found this photo from Tik Tok. I could not stop laughing.

Ok so I had an idea about Ody’s eventual death

Hermes’s smile was tinged with sadness, something unusual for the god. “Hello, old friend.”

“Hello, Hermes.” Odysseus pulled his gaze from his body, wrapped in the funeral shroud lovingly made by Penelope, to the bag in his hands. His fingers clutched it tighter, and he looked up at the messenger god. “Do you think they’ll hate me?”

“They will be angry, but they could never hate their captain.” Hermes took Odysseus’s hand. “It’s time to go.”

Hermes’s hand tightened, so much that Odysseus’s spectral hand would have felt crushed under his godly strength. His feet left the ground, going faster and faster and faster, trailing behind Hermes like the trail of a shooting star. Maybe that’s what he looked like when he delivered souls, Odysseus didn’t know.

His feet touched down on the bank of the river Styx, where over six hundred familiar faces currently waited. Odysseus’s feet hit the ground soundlessly a moment later. This would take some getting used to.

“Goodbye, Odysseus of Ithaca. I’ll… I’ll miss fighting by your side.”

That may have been one of the most genuine things Hermes had ever said. Odysseus smiled and fiddled with his bag. “Hermes? Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me, friend, you died,” he said. “Good luck.”

He vanished with a blur of orange light.

Odysseus took a deep breath. It was time.

He walked—slowly, so slowly—towards his old crew. One by one, they turned to face him. Their eyes fell on his bag, and his old, wizened face, proof of a long life. Odysseus wanted to hide it, but he knew he must remain confident in his decisions from all those years ago.

“Comrades.” His eyes fell on two faces he longed to see- one tall, clean-shaven man with dark skin, and one man with a red cloth headband and a mess of curly hair. “Friends. I come after years of keeping you waiting, and for that I beg your forgiveness.” His eyes fell upon Eurylochus. “But I hope that this can sate your desires to leave this place.”

His hands tugged at the string keeping his bag together, and it came undone, almost as if it were waiting for this moment. Six hundred men saw it open, and a murmur went through them. It contained gold—so much gold that they could all get across the river.

Whispers turned to murmurs, but nobody moved forwards to come get a coin. A huge gap remained between Odysseus and the six hundred men he outlived. His shoulders drooped.

One man stepped forwards. Eurylochus of Same, his second in command. He picked out a coin from the bag, then held it up in the air. “Let’s hear it for Odysseus, our captain.”

The murmurs started up again, until the sound of clapping came from the middle of the crowd. Polites.

Ghostly tears flowed down Odysseus’s face as more and more men joined in. They all started to move towards him, cheering for him. Cheering for the life he got to have. Cheering for the chance to finally be together as a crew again.

Thanks for reading! I’d just like to say that my Hermes transportation scene was mostly based on @witless-winion1 ‘s Ctimene fic.

"you should've led with that."

Athena: Odysseus is just a really good guy. He's so smart and brave and funny and--

Ares (sighing loudly): I get it!

Athena: If you got to know him, you'd like him too.

Ares: You've been talking about him for FIVE HOURS! At this point, I do know him!

Athena (crossing her arms): You'll see what I mean one day.

(After "one day")

Ares (beside Athena's infirmary bed): Oh my gosh, Athena! You should have been there! He started stabbing Poseidon like (acts it out) and Poseidon was all like "Stop! Ah!" and Odysseus was all like "You never stopped!"

Athena (smirking): Told you that you'd like him.

Ares (gently smooshing her with a pillow): You didn't say he was violent. You should've led with that.

Cultifying your wooloo

Penelope during the Ithaca saga: