As Much As I Would Like To Do A Big Fancy Project For Inktober I’m Also Being Realistic That Won’t

Any artists who have their own domain name and sell art thru their website have recommendations of hosts and payment services that are okay with adult content?

I haven’t done much explicit artwork in a long time, in part because the freely accessible websites to share and sell such artwork continue to dwindle. If I’m gonna go to the trouble of setting up and maintaining my own website/shop, I want to be able to sell ALL the kinds of things I make.

Subscription service platforms aren’t suitable for me, because the timeframe in which I make and complete different kinds of art fluctuates so much.

Experimenting with the process of light pencil sketch, marker color, and then ink.

But the Tombow markers that I used for the skin tone roughed up the paper, making the ink blob and feather.

To the extent that I'm not posting a full shot of this drawing because it Does Not Look Good.

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Well. I have now learned this particular matte medium is too opaque to be used undiluted. Unsure if I’ll continue on this, leave it and come back, or leave it entirely.

doing some painting

a boogie man from my Southern childhood

I distinctly remember, at age five, seeing our family friend Stephen Wade tell the 'Taily-Po' story, accompanied by his banjo. I couldn't find a recording of that, but here's a clip of Mr. Wade doing his 'banjo dancing.'

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I’ve finished moving apartments and my repetitive stress injury has improved enough that I can actually do some painting.

Another painting in progress

I was super inspired by @g-e-gogarty ‘s drawings about the personalities of dog breeds, so I thought I’d do drawings of cat breeds but then I realized I’ve never encountered a cat that is actually a specific “breed.” I’ve just had cats that were “it showed up on our porch” breed.

So here is a guide to the many cats that raised me.

(Please view on my tumblr page since it got butchered on the dash...)

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juice-demon replied to your post: You not only spent the time making this beast but also the time thinking about these characters, his power, and its explicit uses for sex to come up with this you absolute fucking nerd   

┬┴┬┴┤  shh... (･ _├┬┴┬┴

ok, so I’m consolidating all the anon messages I’ve gotten into this post, because I’ve gotten a lot!

some of these messages do contain references to abuse, just as a heads up

messages and my responses under the cut

Anonymous said: I can't tell you what that family guy/simpsons/koth crossover comic means to me. At least, not in an ask. Thank you so much for making it! My eyes started watering when Bobbie called up Hank.

Thank you for taking the time to message me. It really does mean a lot to me.

Anonymous said: hello! I just wanted to say your simpsons/family guy/koth comic was the best and I nearly cried over it, as silly as that sounds. you made bart and chris seem like actual people and the affects of abuse from their fathers are realistic and tangible. and the simpsons and homer himself are generally good, but sometimes the actions of both(frequent actions in homer's case) are harmful. with family guy I agree with you 100% and me sort of like chris! thank you so much

It’s not silly to get teary over something that you connect to. I’ve definitely cried over comics that did that for me, and I’m glad you were able to feel that way about my work.

Anonymous said: So like this is weird and all to say I'm sure but I fell out of watching certain animated series (Simpsons, Family Guy, King of the Hill, and other similar shows) in my teens, transitioning into my twenties, because I no longer saw them as funny. I saw them as sad. Mind you, I never found Family Guy funny... but I think also at around that time, the quality of two of those shows took a /massive/ nosedive. Anyway, what I really wanna say is... Thank you for (indirectly) giving me closure.

I completely understand. There are lots of things that I used to really like, but I look at them now and feel really differently. Just a part of growing and becoming more aware, I think. And, wow, hearing that my comic helped to create closure is super cool.

Anonymous said: Hi. Thank you for talking about that comic you made and how horrible Family Guy is. I used to like that show until I realized just how awful it really is regarding Meg. Reading it made me feel chills. I was never abused by my parents - though my relationship was very strained due to my own mental issues and the loss of my father to senile dementia - so while I can't relate to it completely, I understand it a bit. Thank you again. Sorry for staying anonymous. I'm a coward.

I don’t think it’s cowardly to send an anonymous message -- unless it’s a mean anonymous message, THAT is cowardly.

Losing someone to senile dementia is hard. That happened with my great-grandmother and it was so sad to see someone you love disappear in pieces. They’re still there physically, but their personality and memories are going away. I’m sorry you had to go through that.

Thank you for messaging me.

Anonymous said: Hey can you tell us your xenobiology headcanons for alien sailor moon?

Ahh, I don’t really have more than what I initially wrote about??? If I do go back to those ideas, I’d probably... want to do some research... I think xenobiology is super cool, but it’s not something that I know a lot about.

Anonymous said: That comic really captured some of the stuff that always bothered me about Family Guy and all of its various spinoffs. Though I admit King of the Hill would often bug me with Hanks well meaning but often narrow minded views on what were acceptable pursuits for Bobby. This popped up a lot when Bobby showed an interest in traditionally feminine things. Of course now I have Bob's Burgers to enjoy which keeps the wackyness but has a really supportive family dynamic.

Glad you enjoyed the comic! I agree with you about Hank, his character can be narrow minded. But to Hank’s credit and to the show’s credit, it’s generally shown that Hank is in the wrong and even if he doesn’t totally change his mind, he usually tries to be accepting. 

Anonymous said: Wow, you really opened my eyes on the Simpsons. I love the show to death but we need to change the choking punishment as it is outdated and harmful. Also how did Chris and Bart meet?

Thank you! Despite my issues with the show, I do love The Simpsons. I grew up watching it, sitting down with my parents every Sunday to see a new episode, so it has some real meaning for me.

I hadn’t really thought of how Chris and Bart initially meet... I might think on that one for awhile...

Anonymous said: i loved your recent comic!! i also saw your short spiels on both Family Guy and Simpsons and wondered if you had any opinion on Bob's Burgers, or in general other adult audience cartoons?

Glad you liked the comic!

I enjoy Bob’s Burgers, mostly, but it does have some stuff that I don’t like. Like, the episode where Bob becomes a taxi driver had some major transmisogyny in it. I love Tina though. I basically WAS Tina during middle school.

I guess my feelings about Bob’s Burgers aren’t as strong because it’s not a show that I grew up with, y’know?

As for other adult audience cartoons... I had maybe a year where I really enjoyed South Park, and then I got over it. I can’t remember where I heard it/who said it, but the best summary of the problems with South Park I’ve heard is that “the ultimate sin in South Park is caring about something.” Al Gore is mocked for caring about global warming in the same way that Scientologists are mocked for believing L. Ron Hubbard’s stuff -- as if those things are comparable.

South Park sets itself up as a satire, but when your satire relies on bigotry... it’s just bigoted humor.

I saw the episode in which Garrison comes out as transgender and has surgery before I knew much about transgender issues, or even realized that I AM TRANSGENDER. But even without that knowledge, I thought that episode was horrible. It was just disgustingly transmisogynistic. 

Honestly, despite my problems with these shows, I tend to watch comedies where everyone is an awful person. In a way, I think those shows give more freedom to the female characters. Like, they get to be awful in unique ways, rather than being the stereotypical sitcom wife/girlfriend/daughter.

There are some adult cartoons that I enjoy, even though there are aspects of them that I HATE. If I refused to watch anything that I disagreed with, then there would be, like, 0 shows that I could watch. I watch The Venture Brothers and Archer, and both shows have a horrid reliance on transmisogynisitic jokes. I tend to like dark comedies. But I think it’s possible to do a dark comedy without making the oppression of minority populations into the punchline of a joke. (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

Anonymous said: i was choked as a kid by my abuser. recently someone mimed choking me as a joke, and i had an anxiety attack. your comic is helping me contextualize this for them. thank you so, so much! - FJG

Oh wow. I’m sorry you had to go through that -- the initial abuse and the anxiety attack -- no one should have to endure that. I’m glad that my comic was helpful and I hope that person will be more understanding of you in the future.

Anonymous said: Just wanted to let you know you're pretty great. Take care.

Thank you! You take care too.

Anonymous said: DO YOU HAVE A PAYPAL? I SAW THAT LONG ASS COMIC WITH BART AND CHRIS AND BOBBY AND IT BROKE ME UP INSIDE (IN A GOOD WAY, YOU KNOW). IT SO PERFECTLY ADDRESSES THE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE PERPETRATED AND TOLERATED IN OUR SOCIETY, EVEN ON BELOVED TV FRANCHISES. THANK YOU FOR MAKING THAT COMIC. THANK YOU FOR BEING ALIVE.

Hahah! Oh wow! Thank you! I have a society6 and an etsy, so if you just ~absolutely have to give me money~ you can get some art!

Anonymous said: as someone who didnt see that u do nsfw art while i was lurkin before following i appreciate u movin it where i dont see it tbh. cheers for that 👌👌👌 (luv ur art style btw)

No problem! I do have this blog flagged as NSFW on tumblr, but I realize that doesn’t help once someone’s actually on my tumblr page.

Anonymous said: I don't have a question.  I'm sure you're aware by now that your Bart/Chris/Bobby "couples therapy" strip has BLOWN UP all over Facebook and elsewhere, and I just wanted to say thanks for a beautiful comic that made me cry and cry.  Please keep being awesome.

Yeah, it has blown up! Which is cool that so many people are connecting to my work, but also kinda anxiety provoking for me. I had the ~exciting~ experience of being cyberbullied back before cyberbullying was even a term that people used, and I’m kind of terrified of going through something like that again.

Despite that, I’m really glad you liked my comic and that you took the time to message me. You keep being awesome too.

Anonymous said: Do sailor moon aliens have genitals??? Speaking of which what do their babies look like??

lol I hadn’t really thought about it much yet. They probably have genitals... and their babies look like baby octopi.

Anonymous said: Hi! I love your therapy cartoon. Would you like me to add voices to it? I can do Bobby and Bart and can have a good go at Chris. It might be cool.

I’ve gotten a message before this about doing voices for the comic and I think it would be super cool! As long as you link back to my post, I’m fine with it. :)

Anonymous said: Hey! I'm just a random lurker, but I wanted to say that your recent couple's therapy comic really touched me. I have been contemplating returning to school for clinical social work, possibly marriage counseling, and your awesome comic definitely hit me in an inspiring way. Additionally wanted to say that your art is awesome and I'm always so glad to find another artist I enjoy on Tumblr. Keep up the good work! My roommates loved the comic too! <3

Thank you! I’m glad y’all liked the art. Actually, I switched majors from fine art to psychology and I’m currently working on a master’s in counseling. I have never regretted the change. I’m really looking forward to being a therapist one day. Maybe one day we’ll be working in the same field together!

Anonymous said: Hi Panic, less an ask more fanmail.  I found your Couples Therapy piece through a friend on FB and it... it really struck me. I didn't ever have a good childhood growing up with my father and watching shows like the Simpsons and Family Guy made me feel.. normal(?) I'm 25 now and have strained relations at best with my folks -avoiding them being the main response- but your comic is giving me the courage to talk with them again.  I don't know what to expect but I'm no longer paralyzed. w/love AC

Oh wow, that’s amazing. I hope that reaching out to your parents goes well, and if it doesn’t -- that’s a reflection of THEM, not of YOU. Take care!

Anonymous said: Your comic on the Simpsons and family guy made me tear up. I know you said Hank hill isn't the perfect father but the thing is Hank may not beat Bobby he still verbally abuses him whenever he does something that makes him seem different. I headcanon Bobby as trans and it takes a while for Hank to come to terms with it. Hank can get better he's the product of his abusive father cotton. Abuse can make a man have the wrong views on parenting.

Some of Hank’s statements can definitely be emotionally abusive and there are several episodes that have touched on Hank’s difficulties as a parent being partly from how Cotton treated him.

Part of why I love headcanons and fandom is the space for differing ideas and interpretations. I could totally see Bobby as a transgender woman. In the show, Hank is clearly uncomfortable with LGBTQ people -- and anything he’s unfamiliar with -- but he’s also shown as trying to be respectful and being willing to learn. I agree, if Bobby were a trans woman, Hank would probably have a hard time understanding, but I think he’s the kind of guy that would come around eventually, because he loves his kid.

Anonymous said: I'm from North Carolina, and I love a transgender woman.  I am deeply ashamed by the actions of those in charge of my home state.  How do you reconcile similar leanings in Texas?

Oh gosh.

In the first place, you’re not responsible for the actions of the state or the politicians of the state that you came from. There are a lot of politicians in Texas right now who are making statements against including trans rights under Title IX, even saying they will refuse government funding for schools, rather than allow trans kids to use the bathroom of the gender they identify with. That INFURIATES me. Texas has major problems with its school system and there’s a huge investigation going on for the Child Protection Services in Dallas because they are SO BAD and UNDER-SERVED, but these people would rather deny someone their rights, rather than look at major systemic issues.

But I didn’t vote for these politicians. In fact, I voted AGAINST them.

A similar example I can give is this: Because I’m a transgender man, when I “pass” as a man, there is a very real possibility that my voice and my opinions will be privileged over that of the women around me. I think that’s bullshit. But how do I reconcile my beliefs with the differing beliefs/actions of those around me? By trying to be the kind of man that I wanted to be around, back when I was living as a woman. I want to be a man who addresses bigotry when he sees it. I want to be a man who is respectful and understanding. I want to be a man who defers to the women around him when they have the knowledge and understanding. It’s a lifelong process!

Be the kind of person that earns the respect of the transgender woman that you love -- and the respect of other transgender people. Listen to the feelings and experiences of transgender people. Ask what THEY think would be helpful for you to do. Sometimes there isn’t anything you CAN do, and just listening is what someone needs.

I think that your awareness and concern speaks to the honesty of your feelings.

Pretty Alien

Ok, so this is going to be the first in a series of pieces. And it has a backstory.

I was working the night shift and it was totally dead and I was super bored and I got to thinking... technically speaking, Sailor Moon is an alien. She's from the moon. So why does she look like a human?

And then I thought, maybe her Sailor Scout uniform is actually what she looks like, but in attempting to describe Sailor Moon's alien physiology, eye-witness accounts were mistaken for a description of a costume, not an actual body.

So, Sailor Moon's pigtails, bangs, and the little whiskers that I've given her, aren't hair. They're sensory organs, like antennae. The red "gems" described in her uniform are actually poison glands, which are brightly colored to gain the attention of predators. When subject to pressure, they secrete a poisonous liquid, kinda like Cane Toads. The "collar" of the costume is actually a wattle that Usagi's species uses in mating displays. It's inflatable!

Kinda like this:

As for the bunny nose and upper lip... Well... her name is Usagi.

The kanji at the top of the image is bi (pretty) uchuu (extraterrestrial) jin (person) and the katakana at the bottom is the phonetic spelling of Sailor Moon.

I'm sure that Kyozuka sensei would be pleased to see that I'm keeping up my calligraphy skills, all these years after her classes.

If anyone with a better grasp of japanese than me has any corrections, I'm happy to hear them.

Nerd rant over.

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People are my favorite things to draw, but in the name of practice and improvement, I'm trying to expand my horizons

Prepare for some very awkward animals

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