Cat Dad Zhonks Has Been Living In My Head Rent Free & I Just Wanna Say The Hourlyzhongli Twitter Acc

au where everything is the same but they have phones

you’ve almost got it! also i mean all of this in a friendly non-bitchy way, just to clarify preemptively

i’m not bi, but i have many friends who are & have been in that community for a long time & have given me more information about it. i am pan, however, and have identified as such & been in the community for many years! (and have been caught in the middle of this type of discourse many, many times in the pvp arena that is twitter.)

bisexuality, to my understanding, can be defined a few different ways: being attracted to both masculine & feminine people, being attracted to genders both like & unlike your own, and being attracted to 2 or more genders. i’ve seen different people define it different ways, and while i don’t think there’s one right way to be bi (or anything else), i’m not sure which of these definitions is the most widely related to, so i’m listing them all. what i am sure of, though, is that bisexuality does not exclude trans or nonbinary people! we have always & will always be included. so yeah, it doesn’t only mean “attraction to men and women” and most bi people i’ve spoken to seem to dislike that definition (mostly bc the way it’s worded excludes some nb people). also, it’s not uncommon for bi people to have a preference or “lean” towards one gender/s more than another.

pansexuality, which i’m much more familiar with, can also be defined multiple ways: being attracted to all genders, or being attracted to people regardless of gender (i’m sure there’s others, but from my own experience & all the pan people i’ve spoken to, those are the most widely used descriptions). however, it’s not necessarily accurate to say that being pan is being attracted to personality and not looks (or as some people have put it, “hearts not parts”). firstly, because this could imply that other sexualities are only attracted to looks & not personality; second, because it could imply that pan people aren’t attracted to looks at all; and third, because it entirely disregards the split attraction model that many people including myself use (for example: pansexual/aromantic, panromantic/asexual, etc etc). pansexuality can express both physical & emotional/romantic attraction just like any other orientation! also, pansexuality also includes both trans & nb people, obviously. i’ve found it’s much less common for pan people to have a preference or lean, but some of us do!

overall, bi & pan are admittedly very similar, and there’s a great deal of overlap in the people someone who uses one of these labels might be attracted to, but they are slightly different. both are valid, neither erases the other, and neither is transphobic. at the end of the day, the labels we put on our sexualities and orientations are nothing more than tools to serve us and help us express ourselves. they aren’t rigid boxes we must contort ourselves to fit into, and they certainly aren’t weapons with which to harm others (i’m looking at the people who say bisexuality is transphobic as i say that). labels can flex and bend and adopt new/more meanings over time just like any other word in our language, and that’s ok! the way everyone experiences attraction is different and complex, and labels are only here for our own comfort, and sometimes finding a community of similar people. there’s no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way to be bi or pan or anything else, as long as you’re not blatantly disregarding the meaning (like.. someone calling themself a lesbian but expressing attraction to men, or something like that).

anyways, not to ramble or get on my soapbox or anything. again, i’m not the Pan Authority or w/e, nor is there one. everyone has their own thoughts & opinions - these are just mine. sorry this got kinda long; i hope some of this helped and made sense, i’m not great at articulating skdfhlkshfk!!!

if you saw me edit this like 3 times no you didn’t. i fucked up my grammar leave me be /j

Can y'all bitches settle something for me bc it came up in conversation

and i know i'm going to get some heat for this but

the stupid fucking "bisexuals like men and women while pan like everyone" is ridiculous and incorrect

because pansexuality is liking someone regardless of gender right? you dont care about looks? You're in it for the personality, correct? that's what i've always been taught when learning about pansexuality

meanwhile bisexuality does indeed care about looks while pansexuality doesnt. however contrary to popular belief, bisexuality does not exclude transgenders and nonbinaries. If you're hot you're hot, right?

I dont think people who identify as bisexual but exclude the other genders from the two main ones are bisexuals? if that makes sense?

at the end of the day, i know "identify how you want to identify" but pansexuality prioritizes personality and disregards gender, right? meanwhile bisexualty still cares about how you look, but does not exclude any gender. yes there are types and you can lean one way more than another but if you're hot you're hot?

idk if this makes sense, i'm bad at wording things, and I'm also still learning despite being in the community so?

help me learn this, am i correct or incorrect

pansexual is for personality and for everyone

bisexual is for looks and for everyone

also if you're going to try to correct me but be a bitch about it, then i'll just assume i'm right and you're wrong because? why you gotta be mean about it baby? i'm just asking a question and trying to learn more about this. i'm sorry if i'm wrong and i have the wrong mindset but?? at least i'm trying to learn aye?

- ein

childe scenario – foul legacy

childe x gender-neutral reader.  angst and nsfw/smut.  2.4k words.  canon divergence: reader is in place of the traveler plus other plot points. warnings: rough/unprotected sex, choking, biting, overstim. 

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pushing my catboy xiao agenda

happy 420

That’s how you talk to the 🎀𝓑𝓻𝓸𝓼🎀

could you write albedo losing his composure because of readers teasing? he becomes louder than usual too <3

I TRIED i hope this was okay,, i also tried to keep it gn i hope i did an okay good job with that

cute blonde tries to cockblock himself but ends up getting some in the car!!! (volume up) omg ew jk

modern au he’s in a car i guess— you eyefuck him in it for a lil bit then he gets turned on from kissing kissing a lot sorry

you give it to him in the car & i hope the ending wasn’t out of pocket

thanks @colourless-cora @valb3rry @kageyamathegrump @katsukiflr i showed you all random pieces of this & you were rly nice to me…so i will kiss you all…maybe make out a little…kidding @aimicoos didn’t read this but i’ll pretend they did in spirit!!!!

that’s really all it took?

albedo’s a blushing mess now; hidden from your gaze, facing the opposite direction. his hand runs harshly through his hair, separating a couple of strands that catch his fingers.

you giggle, both trying to help him ignore the sudden rush of heat he’s gotten. all thanks to you, and a couple of kisses.

well, maybe you should give yourself a little more credit for allowing curiosity to get the better of you…you seem to be enjoying it a lot more than you thought.

letting your impatience rise from the brief pause of contact, you break the short silence.

“are you seriously hiding? one more, please!” you cheer, thankful he isn’t turned in your direction to see you lick your lips and shift in your seat beside him. “one more, i’m serious!” you exclaim, finishing just in time.

he gives you another giggle with the way his hand comes up to cover just above his mouth, a poor attempt to conceal the smile that’s been all over his face from the second you’ve sat beside him.

wrapping your hand around his wrist, you gently tug at it in hopes he’ll finally give in to what you’ve been waiting for. “just one more” you confirm, sounding like a broken record that he’ll never get tired of.

“but this time, i wanna try something else.”

his gaze moves back up to yours, eyes batting at you expectantly with his cheek in his palm.

oh, he’s cute like this.

you agree with yourself, so cute.

you aren’t quite satisfied with the decision you’ve made in your head, you play your answer over a couple more times.

albedo is cute, yes. your mind travels a little too quickly. the kind of cute that has you starting to think the small fine the two of you could very much face for taking him in his car could be played down.

…you can’t wait until post nut clarity hits you [both] like a truck.

the mood has definitely changed.

you want to open your mouth but it’s instead albedo who does the talking for you. he seems to have made up his own answer, you must have took too long.

oops.

“don’t” he mumbles. you almost miss it, but his eyes have you already prepared in advance to make sure you won’t.

a smile creeps up on your lips, and you continue to speak as you face him. “what?” you mumble, keeping your tone low and full of fake sincerity. it absolutely eats at him.

your smile gets bigger when you see albedo noticeably gulp, allowing yourself to bask in all the satisfaction you receive from the start of what could possibly be much more prominent reactions.

you let your pointer finger shape tiny, soothing circles around his knuckles and on the skin nearby.

“that dangerous face you’re making,” he sighs. “don’t look at me like that, please”

you feel a lot closer to him now, mouth a couple centimetres away from his. albedo knows what you’re going to ask him, he knows you’re not going to give up…not that he wants you to.

and he definitely knows he can’t leave this very parking lot until he gives you what you’ve been starting to put him on edge for.

you toy with him further, “so?” you start.

“how come we got here so early?”

he closes his eyes and shakes his head, your noses briefly meeting with the turn of his head. you love when he lets you tease him, always taking a little more than the last.

you wonder if he’s enjoying it, secretly, all under his regular expression that won’t last for long.

it’s going to be a little different this time; you remember, you wanted to try something new.

your hand slowly travels up his chest, letting your fingertips run in quick, smooth lines along his shirt. he takes in a deep breath.

“we did get here early, yeah” he inhaled. “…but i don’t think i can go in just yet though.”

so he is?

another exhale. his voice is beginning to get breathy and it has you feeling on the edge of your seat, his car leaving you with no space to search for that sense of relief.

“you said you only needed to run in, i don’t see any other issues” twirling your finger around in his hair. “you still never answered me” you pout, “i want some more.”

albedo lets himself fall into your hands— your consistent guidance to blame, leaning into your lips. he’s a lot warmer since the last kiss you shared. that little factor alone has you intrigued, as if there’s more for you to find out.

he has been particularly courteous these last couple of days. you want to put an end to it.

with your hand on the back of his neck, you pull him further in. his lips gently shudder the second he feels your tongue slide over his bottom lip, eyes fluttering open for a split second.

full of surprises, albedo reminisces, he likes that.

whether it be with the way you start things, the way you finish them, how you’re able to catch him off guard with even the most practical and sensible moves in the book— you always leave him astounded.

you just so happen to do it again, breathlessly.

nothing is able to prepare him for the hand that reaches across him down to his crotch. you squeeze him through his pants, feeling him harden in your palm the longer you play with his length.

he pulls away, eyes hazy with a hand coming over yours to hault your movements. “i take back what i said earlier” he murmurs, “i think it’s you who can’t go in yet now” giving a spent laugh. you shake your head, separating the gap between you both by leaning into his neck this time. “maybe, but i think it’s both of us”

albedo gives you a short strained hum as your tongue trails up his neck, breath hot against his skin. the feeling lingers, your hand beginning to claw at his pants. you feel giddy, getting to hide in his shoulder as you work him up. his hand pulls at the fabric of his pockets, fidgeting.

“can you do me a favour?” you almost whisper. he nods, already anticipating to hear your request. “i said i wanted to try something, remember?”

he sucks in a deep breath, body tense and already starting to give in. you always treat him so good, satisfying him down to the smallest of desires he sometimes has trouble understanding.

“i do, what is it?” albedo asks, you choose to stay silent.

you didn’t exactly think you would get to this point and hadn’t planned far enough in advance, you think you’ll make it up along as you go if he asks again, but you plan to have him forget he ever even did.

“can you take these off, for me?” you give him a final squeeze before awaiting his lead and having him do what he’s been told.

for me, those two simple words you’ve chosen to include in your plea begin to overwhelm him. can he take them off, for you? he repeats to himself, of course he can. it has something in his stomach stirring.

anything for you.

he can’t get enough of it, fingers beginning to unzip his pants, for you. his quick obedience has you feeling something similar of your own, low and deep in your gut. your hearts both race as he lets the layer of his underwear free.

you fight the urge to touch yourself in front of him and focus your attention on him, little by little. even if it kills you— both— in the process.

the next kiss you pull him in for is sweeter than before, it gives an intense contrast from the last few that were much hungrier in comparison. it makes him ache and his body skittish, feeling your breath roll over his lips.

he’s starting to get painfully hard, you massage him through the thinner fabric he’s pressed again. albedo keeps his eyes open to savour the moment for a little longer before you pull away again.

you can feel him further into your hand.

“yeah, good boy” the words spill from your mouth, too turned on to catch them in advance. you’re really spoiling him tonight. albedo feels dizzy, the haze in his eyes a contributing factor. the name you’ve just called him has him wanting to turn to liquid, to dissolve right into your touch.

“can you please come here” he rasps, needing to feel your bodies flush against each other. it’s becoming something he can’t go without from you, not even for a couple of days.

you lift your leg over him, chuckling when his hands meet your waist. “are you gonna let me have you in the drivers seat?” tone turning serious as you sit right atop of his dick, the pressure making him wince.

“just have me” he quivers, “like you always do.”

you tell him to move his seat back as you begin unbutton his shirt halfway, trying to expose as much of his skin as possible. you’re breathless, “you look so good right now” praising him as you lean forward to give him another kiss.

you make quick work of pulling down your shorts along with your underwear, thankful your shirt covers a good portion of your lower half. “you don’t mind if somebody sees?” he focuses on pulling down his own bottoms, not seeming to worry. “as long as they can’t see you” you smile.

the rest of your answer is put on hold the second he lets his dick slap his abdomen, what you’ve been waiting for. your lips part when you take a good look. the tip is pink and there’s a couple of veins all over, those are always the first two characteristics that stand out to you when you see him.

something about him is so pretty, it makes you clench. “i‘ve been thinking of riding you all day” you confess, listening to him groan in response. “i just wanna touch you” sighing.

albedo shuts his eyes and nods, an expression on his face almost as if he were in pain. he leaks uncontrollably at your words. you move some of the hair from his face before looking down between the both of you. he bucks his hips, a sign he’s wanting to be fucked right now.

wrapping your hands around the shaft, you feel him throb in your hold as you stroke him softly— the way he likes it. every little sound that leaves his lips has you losing your patience along with him.

he shifts in his spot, trying to feel more of your hand take him. you run your thumb over the tip, making him gasp. “lay back for me.”

and he does. you lift yourself just enough to hover over him, the head kissing your entrance. taking a deep breath, you hold his dick in place and start to lower yourself.

you allow yourself to sink completely on him, relishing in the slight pain of the stretch he brings and the whine he lets through his teeth.

his thighs tense as you squeeze him entirely, chest beginning to heave before you’ve even moved. albedos pupils are blown, mouth slightly open as he stares at you.

he lets his head lean back completely against the headrest, tilted with his neck on full display for you. you lean down, giving him open-mouthed kisses across his neck and chest. you begin to roll your hips over his cock, sitting up with your hands flat and pressed against his toned chest.

it feels hot, warm, like you’re trying to suck him in. you listen to him moan your name, watching him fall apart right under you. his face is flushed as you tell him how pretty he looks, light strands of hair sticking to his neck and a couple across his face as a thin layer of sweat begins to coat his forehead.

you let out an unintentional moan in response when you listen to him. you’ve gotten him so worked up, voice raised by any octave or two with every string of cries he lets out spurring you on.

he lets a hand snake down to near where you’re both connected, starting to play with your body. it’s a habit of his, to touch you regardless of how sensitive you may already be. you both gasp; yours coming from the new stimulation, and his from your body’s reaction to it.

“good-” he pants out, heaving “you feel so good.”

albedo anchors his arm with his other hand on one of your shoulders, his tiny bit of force pushing you down twice as hard when you bounce on him. the hand gripping your shoulder blade not only helps him maneuver you, but is also a gesture of affection.

with that in mind, you bring a hand out to his jaw, cupping his cheek. the sound of your ass against his thighs, his satisfied hums, and your little touches soothe each other into the easy succumb of pleasure.

you bring yourself up and down on his cock, enamoured with the shameless sounds he lets out. “do you think we can cum together, please” his tone desperate, making your legs go limp for a split second.

nodding, you watch his eyes roll back before you shut your own. you don’t know when it’s going to hit either of you, but you’re preparing for it to hit hard. if the way his dick is hitting that one sensitive spot inside you sending shivers down your spine isn’t to blame, it’s how he fills the car with continuous chants of how he feels as if he could shatter right underneath you.

you feel albedo swipe his thumb right across you, knowing exactly how to push you right over the edge and it sends your body into his. you let out muffled whimpers into his damp neck as he chokes on his own breath, your reaction pulling his orgasm out too.

you grind against each other, dragging it out as he drapes his arms around your back. he tells you he loves you between gulps and the cracks of his voice, sweetness in his voice making you spasm.

albedo shares one deep breath with you as you both calm down, lifting your head to look at him. his hair is a mess, half of it still stuck to him as he gives you a half lidded smile that makes you feel a little dizzy.

trying to help you fix your own hair in the process, he gives you a kiss, promising to clean you up as ye caresses your back.

“shit” you mumble, eyes catching the silhouette before you in a flit of panic after you’ve moved back to your seat. your hand instinctively comes up to cover a fraction of your face, self-consciously rubbing your skin afraid to look any closer.

the reaction draws albedo out of his prolonged post-orgasm bliss in the process rather quickly, scanning your expression for what your eyes have landed on. you curse under your breath once more when the realization hits.

“oh, him. looks like i forgot” albedo yawns as kaeya and his unmistaken, unexpected presence dawns over him, a smile plastered on his face. “…somehow” he trails off, turning back to you.

your eyes widen at him, “forgot?”

somehow?

“you must have distracted me” he scratches behind his ear, laughing sheepishly.

you don’t have the energy to give him a playful but well deserved hit to the cheek.

except, you also want to pat yourself on the back for so easily being able to unravel him, starting with just your fingers alone…and a little more afterwards.

but the origin of how albedo has magically managed to regain his composure so nonchalantly is a mystery in itself. you want answers.

“well? so you did know he would be here?” you remind him, looking for some sort of proper explanation. he blinks a couple of times before giving you a look, the kind you easily recognize from in the bedroom.

“of course not.”

of course not, you mock, rolling your eyes. you wait a little while longer in the car as albedo hastily fixes his hair and opens his door.

…here’s to your final moment of peace; unplagued and yet to be disturbed by the storm kaeya is soon going to bring, along with relentless teasing.

you huff, receiving any kind of ticket doesn’t seem half as bad right about now. not bad at all.

sorry if at some point you can tell i’ve never had car sex before

An alternative ending to this. Where instead of walking out the office reader just fucks Childe

Horny jail rn for me right now

Pairings; Childe x reader

Warning(s); horny childe, hate fuck, not sfw, dom reader, lack of aftercare, swearing, orgasm denial, overstimulation, begging, degradation 

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