Help! I Got A Cardiac Arrest (cuteness Overload!!!)

i will never forgive how the anime did my boy

Eiji responding with "Forever." after Ash asked him to stay with him and specifically said, "I won't ask for forever."

"Even if the whole world is against you, I'm always on your side."

"For you, I would do anything!"

Eiji was so IN so committed to being with Ash and it's like.... do you think he had any idea of what that meant to him??? like Ash, who never expected anything from anyone. Whose entire life was filled with people (men specifically) who used him for his body, their own perverse gratifications, or whose loyalty to him was contingent on him being a boss. Like we all know how smart Ash is, he knows his time as boss and leader is fleeting, and at any moment someone could come along and take him from the top, and thus take the loyalty of his crew with him. He knows Dino only sees him as an object someone to use and mold to his purposes. He knows his entire world is fake.

And then here comes Eiji, who from day one sees him for what he is and just accepts and cares for him as Him.

Banana Fish again

Eiji after Ash's death being told over and over by everyone that Ash died to protect him, but Eiji hoping to god that it isn't true, hoping that Ash finally finally understood that Eiji did love him, that Ash's death would hurt Eiji, and hoping that Ash decided, for once, to be selfish. That he knew it would hurt Eiji, but still decided to die because it was what he wanted. Eiji hoping -- praying -- that Ash didn't die for Eiji, but died for himself.

Eiji telling himself (because he has to believe it, for his own sake) that maybe, just maybe, Ash's last act was his most selfish.

Because God knows Ash deserved to be selfish for once.

some people liked my ash that i drew, so here are ash n eiji that i drew last year

some people liked my ash that i drew, so here are ash n eiji that i drew last year

"It was like, all his goodness and trust and -- warmth would come flooding in my body, and... I could feel it filling me up."

My poor baby 🥺

Tbh I'm glad I bought that Angel Eyes art book. Like I couldn't afford anything much right now, much less another grand official Banana Fish merch again, and I cry each time.