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Latest Posts by riotmambo - Page 5
two bros chilling in a blanket fort in the dead of night munching sneakily on some christmas cookies grace baked for the kids @secret-santa-klaus
here is my tua secret santa piece for @fragments-art ! i really enjoyed creating this drawing and i hope you enjoy it as well!! happy holidays!
[obviously, do not tag as ship!]
the gays stay winning
Ahem McDonald’s five au pls?
goddamn it’s been forever but i can’t stop won’t stop so you’RE GONNA HEAR ABOUT MY MICKEY D’S FIVE AU LET’S GO
so. the legal age you have to be to work at mcdonalds is? 14 years old according to google, but it may vary depending on the place. aidan is 16, five passes for 16 even though he’s 13 ok
there is absolutely no way he would actually let them say he’s 13 he’d be like “ugh at least make it 14 damn” even though,,, his birthday is in like,,, less than a year,, ok i realize that isn’t how ageing works but cut me some slack
POINT IS he passes for 14 ok. DOUBLE POINT is that he would wait until he’s legally 14 anyway so idk it works alright
but!! so !! plot time! this is the part i’m bad at but bear with me i’m onto something i swear
five is pissy bc he doesn’t really have anything to do. he takes school online bc he’s way above middleschool obviously, and like?? he moves fast with those classes too bc hes a genius like he knows big brain things yk
so anyway somebody (klaus) jokingly suggests “oh well maybe if youre bored you should get a job or smth it’s not like extra money can hurt anybody ever”
five’s thought process is like
if i get a job i earn money
if i earn money i can spend money how i want and not need to drag my idiot siblings along with me constantly
i GUESS it would be good to have job experience or something whatever
lets be real folks
nobody except for fucking mcdonalds would accept this garbage racoon child celebrity looking 14 year old asshole. i know im exaggerating and there are 100% other places that would employ this walking shitshow but my point stands
klaus and ben chanting: mc donalds! mc don alds! mc donaaaaaalds
five: ffffffffffffiNE
mc donalds it is
also yeah i know its not 2 words but this is my au and besides how can you prove it isnt 2 words in the tua universe?? you cant, check and mate
anyway
five marches his 14yo ass up to mcdonalds like “hire me” and they all just,, they look at this kid,, coming in in schoolboy shorts looking like a prep straight off the school website,, and they hire him instantly.
idk ive never worked at mcdonalds but lets say that there are mainly older teenagers there so like college/highschool students and five comes in on his first day in his too big uniform with a frown and messy hair, his older brother is waving at him from outside and they just “omg little sibling”
five is a prickly asshole! you know this! but they dont!! so they try to approach him and make him feel welcome and he just straight up hisses at them
woah there five thats not how you do social interaction
better luck next time?
anyway this isn’t actually the point of the au the point is five works at mcdonalds and the others take advantage of this always
klaus walks into mcdonalds and hes barely wearing a shirt, ben is trailing after him and the two walk up to where five is manning the cash register, klaus leans over and ruffles his hair, five rolls his eyes but doesn’t maim him immediately?
all of the other workers are like o.o
klaus, in the snarkiest fucking voice, asks five what he would recommend
“this is a mcdonalds”
‘yeah i know that what should i get’
“get a fucking smoothie i know you’re not gonna drink anyway and get out”
ben from behind: actually i wanted chicken nuggets–
“shut up ben you can’t even eat”
ben voice: smh rude
anyway. diego always. always. he fucking comes in decked out in his bondage gear and he walks up to the register completely deadpan but only when it’s five’s shift, and he stares deep into five’s eyes and orders
“one kid’s meal”
five stares back completely emotionless as he rings him up and says “anything else”
“no just the kids meal”
“do you want apple slices with that”
“yeah”
and then he gets the meal and just. gives it back to five. and he gives him the biggest shit-eating grin and tells him to enjoy his lunch and powerwalks out of there before five can get charged for murder
that only works once though bc next time five is READY but so is diego so he continuously orders frappes or whatever the fuck mcdonalds sells
i havent actually been inside a mcdonalds for months i can’t remember what the sell
oh wait lmao frappes are starbucks mcdonalds has uhh mcflurries???
is that what they’re called? mc flurries? what kind of fucking name is that akjdhfksd
ANYWAY THEY ALL BULLY FIVE AT MCDONALDS
allison walking in like “one fish fillet please :)” and everybody whispering bc ohmygod samantha look its ALLISON HARGREEVES what is she doing in our mcdonalds OHMYGOD–!!! and she just keeps smiling as five hands her the sandwich and she walks out, but walks back in seconds later
‘oh by the way luther’s picking you up today’
“i can walk”
‘no you can’t you have baby legs, i’ll see you when your shift is over bye!’
*five’s teeth creaking as he grins his jaw noises* “bye”
anywho
this au pleases me immensely ok
like
you don’t even know how much joy i have from picturing dead-eyed five in a mcdonalds uniform selling a doughnut
somebody keep this gremlin away from their coffee machines though. he learns to use them immediately and gets coffee constantly. they cant even call him out on it bc he pays everytime
well almost everytime but you know its whatever they’re all soft for their adolescent coworker anyway
ok this is where my brain goes bloop but i’ve began a shitty art for this au so like if i ever finish that i’ll put a link here ripppp
YEAH THAT’S IT aren’t you glad i exist because without me you wouldn’t have a mcdonalds five au, YOU’RE WELCOME
from our dysfunctional family to yours, happy holidays!
Never before seen photos from bts of season 1 (via Jeff King)
He says one of his favorite Robert Sheehan improvs came from this rehearsal and I'm dying to know what it was.
Comic Five is a deranged little demon and I love that for him
ben, watching as diego and luther decapitate his statue: so no head?
klaus, trying to act discreet at the funeral: *quietly breaks his skateboard*
Ben: sucks that my childhood was ruined by dad, at least now I’m almost an adult so I’ll be able to leave
The horror:
Five: There's only one thing worse than dying.
Five: *rips off paper to reveal the words "Ben dying"*
Ben: Me.
Five: NO-
The Umbrella Academy as Justin Min Tweets
Luther:
Diego:
Allison:
Klaus:
Five:
Ben:
Vanya:
When oh when will Umbrella Academy come back so I can see how sweet Ben is doing??? 😭
TUA Percy Jackson AU
Just me having the need to combine Fandoms. These are just my very chaotic thoughts in no order. Also I might write a fic to this one day…
Note: Even though I don’t mention it for everyone specifically just where it seems to fit because this post will be really long already they all have ADHD and dyslexia because that comes with being a demigod in the Percy Jackson universe.
Keep reading
Robbie: why are you blue?
Justin: cause I’m a ghost
The sass level is high
Umbrella Academy cast reacting to their Pop Vinyls
my hopes are with the dead
What's scarier: ghosts and ghouls or that the only thing preventing the apocalypse is a 58 year-old man trapped in a child's body and his six dysfunctional siblings?
do u have any hc for ben hargreeves?? i love him so much and theres literally not enough content for him :(
Sure! I have a couple, though not many considering that he’s rarely featured…
Ben has… many mental issues.
BPD I would say, because he seemingly really enjoys being spontaneous but at the same time can NOT handle other people’s shit
Also most likely had undiagnosed anxiety as a kid because he would say stuff like “my stomach hurts :(” (aka how children can communicate their anxiety because they literally don’t know the word) and everyone would go “sHiT rUN” bc eldritch monster.
He was wearing a hoodie when he died, which would have been an act of rebellion at the young age that he was, right?
….Reginald would never allow him to wear that on a mission
THEREFORE
I head canon that Ben did not die on a mission, but while running away.
Which would be why Klaus blames himself (”I didn’t sign up to save him or you!”) since he probably ran away multiple times before ben did and knew the risks
Reginald sat Ben and Five on either side of Vanya because he believed they were the strongest of the rest of them and could kill control her if she had an outburst
He never learned to drive but man he really really wanted to
Died and realized that physical laws didn’t apply to him anymore so he went absolutely buck wild for a little bit there
I’m talking full on standing between walls like a glitched out video game character for no reason other than its so fuckin funny
And driving Klaus INSANE with the I’m not touching you game
Also him and Klaus were really close as kids because Ben was the only one who believed his off the wall bullshit
Like when Klaus freaks out thinking that they’re all robots like Grace because they get cords attached to their heads at night - he’s sEEN IT GUYS - but they all think it’s just another one of his nightmares
But no, Ben’s like “hmm that might be legit”
And yet they can’t prove it because Reginald catches on to them and monitors them in different ways
He’s smart but not like…. in a competitive way, you feel me? Luther and Diego learned a lot through trying to one up each other (like Diego criticizing Luther’s knowledge of spacial phenomenons and Diego taunting Luther with his knowledge of specific wrestling terms)
And not in an identity crisis way, like Five, who needed to prove to HIMSELF that he was capable of great feats
Nope, Ben just wanted to learn stuff for shits and giggles
And lemme tell you just how much that pissed Reginald off :)
Ghost dance party 👻🎶
I was given the opportunity to polish my old TUA artwork, and these two finally look extra adorable!! 😍 I changed Klaus's top to his actual outfit during the dance scene in episode 1 and gave him his necklaces. And of course, Ben be looking fineeee as always ✨
guess who loves colouring but sucks at it ayyyy here’s Ben Hargreeves, no.6!
Ben, reading off riddles: I am broken when my name is spoken. What am I?
Klaus, slamming his fists on the table: THE MCDONALDS ICE CREAM MACHINE
(via David Castañeda's Instagram ☂️)
