Eww Why Are You Having Salad

woke up and it’s another day

My pet bacteria just walked into a puddle of hand sanitizer and died

this is a strong contender for the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever seen

btw i snuck into the hospital and put dr pepper into the IV bag of a sickly old man and he blew up and left behind a perfectly clean skeleton

Every Single Person In The Country Of Denmaark Loves Me And If I Ever Learn Anything To The Contrary I Will Nuke Them To The Stone Ages

if the queen died ten yrs earlier this website wld be full of chibi drawings of doctor who and sherlock Holmes tearfully laying flowers on the steps of buckingham palace

Ugh I just wanna be around a bunch of gay people rn but like cool ones who have sex and don’t know what voltron is

eugh..!! pleugh.. cough cough.. eugffh.. bleugjh.... ptoo...