I Probably Enjoyed This "quick Sketch" A Little Too Much.

wait why am i getting emotional over the fact that this is christen’s first major tournament in the solid starting position that SHE ALWAYS DESERVED

cmon girlies we’re picking out a 10k+ single chapter fic on ao3 to read stomach down head turned towards our phones held next to our pillows as we move only our thumbs to scroll until our sedatives knock us out

9-1-1 ▸ inspired by this post by @buddie-actually + bonus:

I’d just like to talk about filmmaking and the CW for a hot minute.

Katie is very much correct about 1 thing: It’s not up to the creator to decide, how the audience will interpret their work.

You (the CW) can be a producer with tons of a experience, and make a show that you’ve worked on extensively, and you might still not get your message across to the audience. Or they might see things you didn’t intend to put out there. It happens, art is up for interpretation and there’s nothing to be done about it.

So suddenly, you find yourself with 2 actors with great chemistry. Lucky you, most people work hard to get that familiarity going and you just had it dumped in your lap. Here’s the deal though, perhaps that extra second of keeping the camera on their faces as they look at each other is enough for the audience to think there’s some tension between them. Don’t freak out, that’s OK. Again, it’s the audience’s job to pick up stuff here and there from your work that you didn’t intend to put out there. 

The question is, what do you do with this information, if it’s something you can work on?

If your show is solid, as in, you’ve created compelling characters who have arcs that are constantly evolving and plot lines that are leading somewhere and don’t get dumped and forgotten for the sake of new ones, people will keep watching the show regardless of what you do with the romances (unless the romances are the main theme of your story). You can keep an unplanned pairing platonic, in that sweet will they/won’t they spot, for quite a while if you’re a good writer.

But here’s the thing. If the only reason viewers tune in, is the pairing, you’re in some deep shit. Because if you keep the interactions platonic just to keep your show alive, you’re teasing the audience. You’re baiting them into tuning in to a bad show for the sake of unresolved tension. Basically, you’re not doing a good job. 

So, regardless of accusations of queerbaiting, which, in this case are accurate, you’re just not doing a good job. And the least you can do in the last season, after your show has been canceled, is have the balls to at least deliver what you’ve teased the audience into keeping your work alive and your paycheck running for - which is for the relationship to become canon. It’s really not that complicated.

Hi, hope you're doing well! I thought I'd ask if you have any other fic recs, or just something you read recently that stayed with you?

yes ALWAYS, please see previous recs here which i stand by with my whole heart but scrampled egg brain also recalls these from recently:

one-shots:

still, you said forever by @takethegrasskara / AKAWWJJD

liar, liar by @hrwinter

i need you to pencil in the rest by @mooosicaldreamz

(your love keeps lifting me) higher and higher by @i-am-robie

don't you know (that you don't even need to try?) by @coffeeshib

the s6 reunion we deserved by @itllsetyoufree

kisses (Soft) by @littlemousejelly

lightning strikes (maybe once, maybe twice) by dancingthru

hey love, whoever got you got gold by ghostblue

multi-chaps:

hung the moon by @gveret-fic (wip)

'cause there's this tune i found (that makes me think of you somehow) by @valkyrieskwad (wip)

you're one in a million by @jazzfordshire (wip)

would you forget me? (do i know you?) by @hrwinter

people will say we're in love by @takethegrasskara / AKAWWJJD

ONCE AGAIN LADIES AND GENTLEMEN KATIE MCGRATH IS THE TOP FEMALE TUMBLR CELEBRITY LETS HEAR IT FOR THE QUEEN

i. happy.

"Are you happy?"

It's the first time somebody has asked her that ever since that day in the lake, before Lena's life was turned upside down.

Lex fixes the straps of her helmet, a finger booping her on the nose, her teeth chattering a bit in the cold morning air but she's grinning so wide at her brother and that's all the answer he needs.

"Hell yeah!" She yells with all her six-year old might, throwing herself into her brother's arms. Chuckling as he gathers her in his arms.

She hears the sound of horses blustering and trotting about, getting closer and closer. Excitement courses through her veins. The first time she arrived in the Luthor estate, Lex took her on a tour and all she ever wanted to do after that was wander the stables and talk to the horses. He promised her he'd take her riding once she was big enough to reach his waist.

That day has finally, blessedly come.

She woke up with Lex at the edge of her bed, holding a purple helmet, a glittering bow on top of it. His quiet 'Happy Birthday, Lena' getting drowned by high-pitched excited squeals.

Lex carries her across the field, his footsteps sloshing on the muddy ground. He settles her on the saddle gently, before hoisting himself up as well.

Happy, Lena thinks, is what it's like riding across the estate for the first time; Lex pressed behind her, his hands guiding Lena on the reins.

With him, Lena always knows just where to go.

******

“Are you happy?” Andrea breathes, her words almost getting lost in the strong Atlantic winds. Her arms wrapped around Lena’s waist, the glittering water below them threatening to overwhelm her with its vastness.

They were standing on the edge atop the deck of the ship. What better way to celebrate graduating senior high than jumping into your family’s ship and tracing the Titanic’s route?

“Yeah,” Lena murmurs, head tilting to the side, pressing her temple to Andrea’s jaw. “So very happy.”

Happy, she thinks, is the warmth pressing across her back, anchoring her amidst the overwhelming vastness of the unknown.

With her, Lena knows exactly just where she’s headed.

******

“Are you happy?”

This time, the words are staticky and far-away. Jack is in a different city, sleeping on a different bed.

And Lena is here, in this empty National City apartment, isolated and so far above the bustling neon life.

Is she happy?

What is happiness anyway?

She thought she knew.

“No,” Lena whispers into the dark, “I’m not.”

Jack sighs on the other end of the line. “Look, I know you don’t want to hear this, but…” he trails off, sighs deeply again, “you know you can always come back to me.”

“Jack-”

“Or, I can come to you.”

For the first time in her life, Lena doesn’t know where she’s going, where she’s going to end up. She can drop dead tomorrow on her way to L-Corp for all she knows, murdered in a parking lot, courtesy of Lex.

One thing she’s certain of though is that she will never go back—she cannot go back.

“I’ll be fine,” she says, “I’ll be fine, Jack. I promise.”

She’ll be fine, she just doesn’t know about happy though.

******

"Are you happy?"

She never knew those words can be spat out in such a vile manner. But well, she should've known better than visiting Lillian Luthor.

It was rhetorical, she knows.

She wanted to say, yes.

Yes, I'm very happy that you landed in this shithole never to come out. I'm very happy because the world is a better place for it.

But the tears streaming down her face as she gets into her car says otherwise.

******

"Are you happy?"

The question was one she expected. It was her 6th month into therapy, and well, she already knew this was coming. She always asks her this 17 minutes before the session ends.

"Very much so," Lena answers; brief and truthful.

"That's good," her therapist says, she looks up from her clipboard, eyes softening at Lena.

Maybe, it's because she's been slowly but surely pouring out her soul in the span of 26 consecutive Thursdays, that she finds herself speaking, "I'm happy. I- I never thought happiness could be like this."

Lena breathes in deep, swallows, wrings her hands together.

"B-but I'm learning. I- I deserve this. I deserve to be happy. My happiness is mine, and mine alone. I worked on it. Hard. And I- it-" she stutters, breathes again.

"It still isn't perfect you know? Some days it hurts," she says, her therapist nods at her solemnly, "a lot. It hurts a lot. I hurt a lot. But it doesn't mean I deserve to hurt."

Her voice comes out stronger this time, "I choose to be happy, because I deserve to be happy. It took me a long time to see that."

"But now?"

"But now, I know better."

******

"I'm happy."

"Oh yeah?" Kara says, smug. She's propped up on one elbow facing Lena. Her fingers running up and down pale skin. "Mm, you know, I guess I'd be happy too, after those three orgasms."

Lena gasps, smacks her on the arm. "That wasn't what I meant, and you know it. You're insufferable."

Kara just laughs, grabs her hand from swatting her again, and brings it to her lips—kisses the inside of her wrist softly.

"M'sorry. Sorry. What did you mean?"

Lena's heart calms, and warmth blooms from that one point of contact.

"I'm happy," Lena repeats, and for some reason there are tears in the corner of her eyes.

"So happy with you. We've come so far," Lena whispers, shuffling closer to Kara. The sheets rustling, till her skin touches skin, their faces a breadth apart.

"We did," Kara murmurs back, words tracing her lips, "I'm so proud of us."

"Me, too."

And this, Lena thinks, is what happy is supposed to feel like—home.

And this, Lena thinks, is where she was meant to end up in all along.

Twinsies 👂