I Wonder If Queer People Are So Fond Of Mythical Creatures Because They’ve Been Taught That Their Own

“I really like your turtle. Better than most of the fish.”

concept: you are invited to a potluck. you bring paper plates, only to discover that everyone else has done the same. a gentle thunder fills the room; the result of a dozen rumbling stomachs.

amid tired looks of resignation, it dawns on you what must be done. taking a paper plate, you stand, and softly, you break it, saying

“the Body of Christ”

my CLOWN of a sister has betrayed me

“Can I borrow underwear?” I asked. “Sure!” she said. “Take these, they’re comfortable! Thongs are comfortable.”

Formal complaint, Vivs: Your underwear is in my butt

Will I ever regain the ability to walk as I once did? Or am I forced to waddle the streets with a face contorted in pain, like Psyduck in lingerie

slinking about

birds at 5 am: hmm.... u kno what i haven't done in a few hours.... scream

She’s definitely a lesbian. I don’t blame her for not knowing it in that time period though. We love Jo, suppressed desires and all

watched Little Women yesterday and at the part where Jo is turning down Laurie and saying “I just can’t feel that way about you, I don’t know why” the girl behind me went “Is she a lesbian?... Oh my god I think she’s a lesbian”... god I WISH

Eboy this...egirl that.... And what am I ? An ediot...

all I can think about is that Arthur Weasley would think fidget spinners are the best thing since sliced bread

His lips landed on the stranger’s jaw and he imagined it was Harry’s.

I’m so sorry, he thought. And he placed each gentle, wet kiss like an apology, leaving a trail of repentance.

Traces of stubble scratched his lips. He raked teeth down the man’s neck, heard him groan. He sucked the skin there and tasted sweat.

Harry after Quidditch. Harry with stubble. Harry under him, moaning.

~

yes so I wrote this thing I’m actually quite proud of it it’s not cheery but it’s hella raw and I might write more so :)

Muggle London, Gay Bar, Hook-Up, One Night Stands, Pining Draco Malfoy, Gay Draco Malfoy, Angst, Eating Disorders, Unresolved, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Kissing, Neck Kissing, Moving On, Roleplay, Self-Hatred, Post-Battle of Hogwarts, Sensuality, Crying, Men Crying, Eggs, Internalized Homophobia, Pining, POV Draco Malfoy, Grinding, Vulnerable Draco Malfoy, Past Sexual Abuse, Boundaries, Consent, Oh also, Indian Harry Potter

you know what’s probably more fun than playing chess? cheating at chess

“ohhh would you look at that, my pawns found jesus and now they’re all bishops”

“so i realize it looks like i’m putting a thimble on the board but actually my rooks have been using their downtime to build another rook, one that’s better, stronger, faster—”

“hey welcome back. while you left to get a snack, those six pieces you’d captured slipped their guards, tunneled to safety and emerged right in the middle of your royal palace.”

“oof, looks like you’ve got my king cornered…maybe this is a good time to mention that shortly before we started playing, my pawns and knights revolted and instituted a representative democracy. feel free to kill the puppet ruler that was the one remaining vestige of our tyranny, you cringing servant of the crown. vive la revolution!”