THIS IS THE BEST THING TO EVER COME ACROSS MY DASH 1,000,000/10

garlic bread to share to your aspec friends :)

rb to share

Reblog if you think asexuality is a legitimate sexuality.

I'm trying to prove something.

Why would you eat children? they have more bones which means more work to eat around and more evidence.

i'm so hungry I could eat a small child

how tf do you die from ATTEMPTED murder the whole thing about that is you actively failed the murder

First thing you see after you zoom in is how you die

How you dying 👀

It's my 2 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

the vld crew as shit me and my friends have said/done irl-

shiro

[accidentally spills hot sauce in his water]

[drinks water anyway]

shiro [with tears in his eyes] : why do my attempts to die always come back to bite me in the ass?

keith

[enters his name for a sports competition due to peer pressure]

[ gets directly selected as the new team captain after the try outs]

keith [ panicking ]: FUCK WHAT THE FUCK. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN- I'M TO YOUNG TO LOOK AFTER 12 KIDS-

lance

[jokingly proposes to crush]

[crush can't tell it was a joke and asks him out ]

lance (blushing) : how dare he pull the fucking uno reverse on me.

allura

allura (innocently) : i don't see why people are so intimidated by me.

also allura just a few minutes later : [ karate kid-s a boy into the floor for cat calling her friend]

pidge

[during an all nighter before exams]

[opens instant coffee packet to make another cup for themselves]

[take a spoon and directly eats the coffee instead of putting it into the coffee maker]

pigde [in demonic voice with tears in their eyes] : i don't regret shit. i can feel the coffee in my veins. my blood is better than any latte.

hunk

[ on a road trip ]

[ the driver starts to drive too fast]

hunk : [immediately throws up in the car with no warning]

hunk: oh.

coran

[ cracks egg on a pan and starts making scrambled eggs ]

[ adds in pineapples half way through]

coran : guys, just trust me, this will taste like heaven. you'll thank me later.

matt (bonus!!)

matt : [sees a meme man graffiti on the wall]

matt : [kneels in front of it]

matt : [begins to cry]

I hate family vloggers so much imagine having this little respect for your adolescent kid’s privacy and personal life

❔

WTF DOES THIS MEAN?????

your 12th emoji is how you'll die

☕️

there he go

gummy lamas