The Bastile Summarized:

I can’t with these reviews:

- “Indulgent, Romantic, and an Ineffable delight”

- “The Sweetest Love Story This Side of Heaven”

- “A lovey-dovey shipper’s delight”

Like, these last hours are killing me!!!!

I was thinking about Midge and Lenny while working on a new chapter of “Very Blue Lives” (it’s on ao3, please go read and review. I need validation like Lenny and Midge need each other).

Anyways, I was thinking about Midge and Lenny in Miami and why Midge turned Lenny down.

Sure the bs Vegas train wreck just happened, and Carol kind of freaked her out, but those answers are boring.

First of all, he’s weirdly reluctant to talk about her career. In Miami, whether she knows it or not, Lenny’s avoidance to discuss her career is part of the reason she walks away. Flash forward to the blue room, he’s making it clear that he listens to her and promises to take her seriously, and that’s when she decides “yes, okay. Let’s see what’s between us.”

She needs him to take her seriously as a comic, and once she realizes that he does, she’s willing to be vulnerable with him as a woman.

And that’s a great step for Midge, who isn’t taken seriously personally or professionally, especially by people she loves.

Good Omens Incorrect Quotes Part 3:

Once again, I did not come up with these, I just have quote generator access…

Crowley : I'm having problems with a guy...

Anathema : Like his dead body won't fit into your trunk kind of problems, or you like him kind of problems?

*

Crowley : Who the fuck-

Aziraphale : Language!

Crowley : Whom the fuck-

Aziraphale : No.

*

Aziraphale and Crowley : I believe in you, Adam!

Adam, to themself: God, I must suck. The nicest thing they can think to say to me is that they don’t doubt my existence.

*

Aziraphale : There are some things beyond our understanding. We must accept them and learn from them. Because these moments of crisis are also potential moments of faith. A time, when we either come together or fall apart. Nature always has a way of balancing itself. The only question is, what part will we play?

Crowley : Did you just make that up?

Aziraphale : No. I read it in a fortune cookie once.

Crowley :

Aziraphale : A really long fortune cookie.

*

Crowley: Could you maybe just like… stab me… right in the gut. Just REALLY twist it in there. ‘Cause that honestly seems less painful than this conversation.

*

Aziraphale, texting Crowley: Text me when you’re home safely.

Crowley: I’m home dangerously.

Aziraphale: Stop it.

Crowley: I’m home lethally.

*

Gabriel : Pardon the intrusion, but-

Aziraphale or Crowley: On this moment or just my life in general?

*

Aziraphale: Why shouldn't you put a toaster in a bathtub full of water?

Crowley: Because your toast would get soggy!

*

Aziraphale: When I said bring me something back from the beach I meant like a conch shell!

Crowley: *Struggling to hold a seagull* Fucking say that next time!

*

Crowley, at Nina’s: Can I get a venti vanilla latte with um, seven espresso shots.

Mrs. Sandwich, in line behind them: Jesus Christ, just do cocaine.

*

Crowley, making coffee: This is going to fix everything.

*

Aziraphale: I have very high standards, you know.

Crowley: I can make spaghetti...

Aziraphale: Oh no! You're meeting all my standards!

*

Crowley: You can do it Adam!

Crowley: But if you can't, at least your death will be quick, painless, and really cool to watch.

*

Crowley: *standing on a balcony and sneezes*

Aziraphale: *standing on the roof* Bless you.

Crowley: God?!

*

Crowley: I'm sorry. Please talk to me.

Aziraphale:

Crowley: Hello? World's most amazing person?? Sweet pea? Precious cinnamon roll that's too good for this world, too pure?

Aziraphale: 'Sorry' doesn't bring back my fucking M&M’s.

*

Aziraphale: Is five a lot of followers?

Crowley: Depends on the context.

Crowley: On Instagram? No, not a lot of followers.

Crowley: In a dark alley? Yes, a lot of followers.

*

Crowley : You know what’s funny about Aziraphale ? They’re my best friend, and anyone who’d hurt them is someone I’d murder, probably.

*

Crowley : Are you busy?

Aziraphale : Yes.

Crowley : Cool, listen to this...

*

Aziraphale or Nina: How would you like your coffee?

Crowley: As dark as my soul.

Aziraphale or Nina: Got it, one cup of milk coming right up!

*

Crowley : I can’t believe all these people are wearing black. black is supposed to be my thing, they’re all just posers.

Aziraphale: Crowley, for the last time, we’re at a funeral.

*

Aziraphale: No more making fun of me when I misuse dated cultural references, alright? Are we cowabunga on this?

Crowley, sighing: Fine. We're cowabunga.

*

Crowley : *trying to get five seconds of sleep*

Aziraphale, poking Crowley ’s arm: Crowley Crowley . Crowley . Crowley .

Crowley : WHAT?

Aziraphale : …We’re out of Capri Suns—

*

Crowley : Valentines Day? I'm ready. *Sprays an entire can of AXE body spray on themselves*

*

Crowley : *makes Aziraphale a cup of tea but puts salt in it*

Aziraphale : *sips tea*

Crowley :

Aziraphale : *finishes tea*

Crowley : Didn't it taste bad?

Aziraphale : Yeah, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings so I drank it all.

Crowley, tearing up: Oh, okay.

*

Aziraphale : How petty can you get?

Crowley : I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

*

Aziraphale : Crowley, I beg of you. Please, PLEASE go to the doctor.

Crowley : Hey, I'm sorry. Is this OUR stab wound?

*

Crowley, to The Squad: You should change your passwords to “incorrect”. Then, every time you forget it, the system will remind you, “your password is incorrect”.

*

Aziraphale : Not to brag, but I can go into the Spirit Halloween without crying.

*

Crowley : I wanna sleep for 40 hours.

Aziraphale : You know that's called a coma, right?

Crowley :

Crowley : That sounds so refreshing, I could totally go for a light coma right now.

*

Aziraphale : Ugh, crushes are so dumb.

Crowley : I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid.

Aziraphale : But you’re always acting stupid?

Crowley : ...

Crowley : Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

*

Muriel : Hey, aren’t you Aziraphale ?

Aziraphale : You a cop?

Muriel : No.

Aziraphale : Then yes, I am.

*

Aziraphale : Crowley ! Have you no dignity?

Crowley : Of course not! How long have we known each other?

*

Aziraphale : What are you drinking?

Crowley : Vodka.

Aziraphale : Straight?

Crowley : No, gay. Why?

*

Aziraphale : So you like cats?

Crowley : Yeah.

Aziraphale : *tries to impress them by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

*

Cop: You ran a red light.

Crowley : So did you, hypocrite.

Cop: I was following you.

Crowley : That was dumb, I'm a terrible driver.

Cop: Get out.

*

Aziraphale : What is the one thing I told you not to do?

Crowley : Burn the house down.

Aziraphale : And what did you do?

Crowley : I made dinner.

Aziraphale :

Crowley :

Aziraphale :

Crowley : And burnt the house down.

*

Aziraphale : Do you need help getting up?

Crowley : Nah, I'm cool down here on the floor.

*

Crowley : Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle, and explode into bats to get out of all social situations.

*

Anathema: At first I thought you were foolish and incompetent.

Crowley : My apologies for whatever misstep I may have taken to dispel that impression. It was an honest mistake, I swear.

*

Aziraphale to Crowley : Turn that frown upside-down!

*a little while later*

Aziraphale : What are you doing?

Crowley , trying to do a handstand: You told me to “turn that frown upside-down” but it’s not working .

*

Gabriel: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?

Crowley: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

you know what the amazing thing is about the multiverse? everyone’s otp can happen. so please stop hating on people who don’t ship the same couples as you and also please stop posting hate about ships in their tag just use ‘anti shipname’.

this is from a real diary by a 13-year-old girl in 1870. teenage girls are awesome and they’ve always been that way.

Good Omens Incorrect Quotes Part 1

Yeah, I found the incorrect quotes generator so…

I know some of these have been done but…

Crowley: You are the love of my life and I would do anything within reason to make you happy.

Aziraphale: I would be happy if you ate, stayed hydrated and got a reasonable amount of sleep.

Crowley: I said within reason, Aziraphale. How about I murder that guy?

Aziraphale: So murder is in reason but proper self care isn't?

Crowley: Well, duh. What kind of question is that

*

Aziraphale: I have feelings for you.

Crowley: Why? What's wrong with you? Are you sure you're okay?

*

Crowley: Aziraphale, you love me, right?

Aziraphale: Normally I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won’t like.

*

Crowley: Relationships should be 50/50. Aziraphale cooks us dinner while I sit on the kitchen counter looking pretty.

*

Crowley: My hands are cold.

Aziraphale: Here, let me hold them.

Crowley: My lips are cold too.

Aziraphale: *covers Crowley's mouth with their hand*

*

Aziraphale: I don't know how to tell you this, but... I love you.

Crowley: That's great, Aziraphale. Especially considering the fact we've been married for 6000 f***ing years.

*

Aziraphale: Are you sure Crowley's even gay? They barely even looked at me.

*

Crowley, sweating: Aziraphale, there’s something I need to ask you-

Aziraphale: Finally! You’re proposing!

Crowley: How’d you know?

Aziraphale: Crowley, you’ve dropped the ring five times during dinner.

Aziraphale: I even picked it up once.

*

Aziraphale: You have to apologize to them Crowley.

Crowley: Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!

*

Crowley: I am so cool. I am an absolute Chad. I am the epitome of coolness and awesomeness—

Aziraphale: Hi.

Crowley: *melts down in a flustered heap of softness*

*

Aziraphale, to Crowley: We had a date!

Aziraphale: *aggressively points to Hello Kitty Coloring Book*

*

Aziraphale: Are we fighting or flirting?

Crowley: I'm pinning you against a wall with my hand around your neck-

Aziraphale: Your point?

*

Aziraphale: Is something burning?

Crowley, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.

Aziraphale: Crowley, the toaster is literally on fire.

Regeneration and Character Arcs:

It’s a popular fan theory that Ten is a regeneration made for Rose. I have mixed feelings about the idea that he’s ’incomplete’ without her.

There’s also something kind of sweet about Nine wanting to become the pretty boy he thinks she likes or (if allowing himself to be self-loathing) deserves. It’s only sweet because he literally has to change.

The Stone Rose novel confirms that Ten’s accent in-universe specifically came from Rose. It’s a less extreme version of him being made entirely for her. Plus, it’s a cool sci-fi exploration of how humans pick up accents after long, continuous exposure. A very alien way to retain a quirk of human nature.

There’s something nearly Shakespearean and so acutely human about Ten’s arc. He loves, loses, grieves, heals, and makes new connections. He moves from ‘I exist for Rose’ to ‘I miss Rose and wish I could exist with her but I’m also allowing myself to care about these other people.’ Then he loses them. It drives him to unthinkable darkness, and by the time he claws his way into the light, it is time for him to die.

Is that arc any more impactful if he’s literally created for someone?

I don’t know.

Incorrect Shakespeare Quotes: Much Ado About Nothing 2

Benedick: Well, if you're not at least a little bit gay for your friends, then what kind of friend are you?

Benedick: Hey Beatrice, can you give me the opposite of these words?

Benedick: Always, Coming, From, Take, Me, Down.

Beatrice: Never, Going, To, Give, You-

Beatrice: The fucking satisfaction.

Benedick, very tired: Can I sleep in your bed?

Beatrice: *half asleep* Benedick, this is a queen-sized bed. That means it’s for *gestures vaguely to themself* the Queen.

Benedick: *venting endlessly to Beatrice about their week*

Beatrice, every once in a while: *in a monotone* Wow, that is so wild.

Benedick: Beatrice, can I ask you a question?

Beatrice: You just did.

Benedick: Okay, can I ask you two questions?

Beatrice: You just did.

Benedick, frustrated: OKAY, CAN I ASK YOU FOUR QUESTIONS?!

Beatrice: You just did.

Benedick: When?!

Beatrice: Just now.

Beatrice, to Benedick: I'll be under the mistletoe when you start feeling desperate!

Benedick: Valentines Day? I'm ready. *Sprays an entire can of AXE body spray on themselves*

Benedick: Tommorrow's garbage day.

Beatrice: I can't believe they made a whole day dedicated to you.

Beatrice: I love the term 'partners'. Are we dating? Are we robbing a bank? Are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit? Who knows.

Benedick: We have a problem.

Beatrice: No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them.

Benedick: So... what would you do if you were in bed with me?

Beatrice: Depends. Is your bed comfortable?

Benedick: Yes.

Beatrice: I'd sleep.

Benedick: I left instructions for everyone while I'm gone.

Beatrice: Mine just says "Beatrice no."

Benedick: I want you to apply it to every possible situation.

Beatrice: I want to kiss you.

Benedick, not paying attention: What?

Beatrice: I said if you die, I wont miss you.

Beatrice: A fistfight CAN be romantic.

Beatrice: I've met a lot of pricks in my time, but you, Benedick, are a fucking cactus.

Benedick: You know, when I first met you I thought you were a real bitch.

Beatrice: What changed your mind?

Benedick: Oh, I still think you're a bitch. I've just grown to like that about you.

Benedick: I’m in love with you.

Beatrice: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.

Benedick: I know.

Beatrice: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

Benedick: Even Beatrice and I have been getting closer. The other day, they gave me half of their sandwich.

Beatrice: I mistook them for a garbage can.

Leonato/Don Pedro: Woah dude, premarital handholding? That’s just not cool or groovy.

Beatrice : Of course I have a lot of pent-up rage, you fool! I've been the same height since I was twelve!

Beatrice/ Benedick: Not to be nsfw but I want someone to hold me while I sleep.

Beatrice : If karma doesn't hit you, I fucking will.

Don John: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.

Beatrice : I love sarcasm! It’s like punching people in the face, but with words!

Benedick : My heart is guarded but like… very poorly. The kind of guards that would let 3 kids in a trench coat into an R rated movie.

Beatrice : I'm not funny, I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.

Benedick , at Hero’s funeral: I need a moment with them.

Everyone: Of course. *They leave*

Benedick , leaning over Hero′s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead.

Hero : Yeah, no shit.

Beatrice , to Benedick : How do you tell someone politely you want to hit them with a brick?

Beatrice : If I may interject...

Benedick : Oh, awesome, Beatrice was eavesdropping.

Benedick: Can I bother you for a second?

Beatrice: You're always bothering me, but go ahead.

Beatrice: Hey, Benedick? I need advice.

Benedick: I’m pretty useless at giving advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment instead?

Beatrice: My hands are cold.

Benedick: Here, let me hold them.

Beatrice: My lips are cold too.

Benedick: *covers Beatrice's mouth with their hand*

Okay, the next installment of Domestic Burlesque is up. This deals with some heavy elements so mind the tags. Please tell me what you think!

Thoughts on Aziraphale

Spoilers below:

I think its such a big step for Aziraphale to admit out loud that Gabriel (who enforced Heaven’s will) used be awful.

The reason he’s so flirty after the church scene is because he realized he’s in love with Crowley. But once Crowley leaves, and he has time to think over everything…he gets scared.