Reblog If You’ve Read Fanfictions That Are More Professional, Better Written Than Some Actual Novels.

Why do witches like always wanna fatten kids up before they eat them?? fat is like the grossest part of meat

At the gate for my flight home from visiting friends and there's a woman here with a service Shiba Inu. No pics because he has a Do Not Disturb vest and taking pics of strangers is illegal but I need to stress how ON DUTY this animal is. Ears up. Eyes doing Lazer scans of everything. Examining everyone who passes within 10ft like a security guard. Ass planted on her feet. I have never seen a dog with such intense chivalric guardian energy before. He has tiny eyebrows and they are FURROWED with concentration.

Girls will be boys

Boys will be girls

Fascists will 💖 be shot💖

There really is no feeling quite like discovering a new song that fits your blorbo to a T. Best I can do to convey it is something like

No I’m not attracted to you. Quit your evil putting your finger under my chin to make me look up at you. I know I’m your nemesis and all but we really need to set some boundaries when you’ve got me tied up like this.

your heart is a muscle the size of a rat

A comic (?) about my love of weird little bats for this halloween