Reporter: We Heard You Had A Soft Spot For Tigers, How Do You Feel About The Fact That They're Going

reporter: we heard you had a soft spot for tigers, how do you feel about the fact that they're going extinct?

marvel: the day all tigers dies is the the day I'm gonna kill myself.

reporter:

marvel:

the JL concern:

Marvel: “What? It’s true.”

Flash: “But why??”

Supes: “Cap, surely you could find another favorite animal…?”

*silence*

Marvel: *disgust*

Supes: *looks ashamed and floats away*

Marvel: “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

Wondy: “Brother, you didn’t answer Flash’s question. Why would you kill yourself over tigers?”

Marvel: “Why wouldn’t I? They’re the bestest animal in the world.” *completely serious*

GL: “Yeah, but does being the bestest animal in the world really warrant that.”

*silence*

Marvel: *disgust again*

GL: *ashamed too*

Marvel: “Anyways… there’s also the fact one of my bestest friends is a tiger too. If they all went extinct, that would include him.”

Reporter: “You have a friend who’s tiger?”

Marvel: “Yes, his name is Tawky Tawny and he’s a gentleman.”

GL and Flash: “Wait, but I thought we were your best friends?”

Marvel: “You guys are. You’re my best human friends. Mary and Junior are my best family friends, and Tawny is my best non-human friend.”

GL and Flash: “Oh. Sweet!” *do little victory dance together*

Marvel: *looks back to the Reporter* “So yeah, if anything were to happen to tigers I would kill myself— actually no I wouldn’t.

Reporter: “Pardon-” *now thinks that everything he said earlier about kms-ing was a joke*

Marvel: “Yeah, no. I would probably die of grief, like an elephant.”

Reporter: “…Oh.”

Marvel: “I would also probably die of grief like an elephant if elephants were to die too. Scratch that, any animal besides wasps.”

Marvel proceeded to yap for like twenty minutes about which animals he’d die of grief over like an elephant for.

More Posts from Toobytoobs and Others

1 week ago

"a girl is damned if she does, damned if she doesn't" - my professor

if this isn't stephanie brown......................


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1 month ago

i hate david cain for doing cassandras hair before he sent her into that room. there are already so few tender moments he shares with her, but i think that one, the one we dont ever see, is the one that makes me hate him the most.

4 months ago

I can’t get over the fact that this IS the most likely ship name for them

doodle of cassie sandsmark and cassandra cain leaning in for a kiss

you guys liked casscass huh


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4 weeks ago

absolute bruce giving birth to tiny titans cass

Absolute Bruce Giving Birth To Tiny Titans Cass

and theres a very good fic based on it!

i drew this before knowing this bruce is a baby faced 24yo, which significantly improves it i think. young dad beam ⚡

3 months ago

Forever a strong believer of short Cassandra Cain and tall Stephanie Brown

Idk man, just let Steph be a tall gal, she deserves it after putting up with all of the Bats’ bullshit.

And obviously Cass is gonna have stunted growth from the malnourishment she probably went through when she was homeless for like 9 years


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6 months ago

The Captain Marvel Dad AU is literally just Billy not wanting to be adopted SO bad that he mentally adopts everyone else.

And that is so Billy-coded

Like, yeah, you just got adopted by this preteen, but that’s only cause you didn’t adopt him first! You snooze you lose


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3 months ago
Cass Has No Limit To Her Menu.
Cass Has No Limit To Her Menu.
Cass Has No Limit To Her Menu.
Cass Has No Limit To Her Menu.
Cass Has No Limit To Her Menu.

Cass has no limit to her menu.

4 months ago

Are fancams/edits of superheroes a thing in Gotham? Can an average Gothamite obtain materials with enough clarity? Wouldn't a Batman fancam be just a bunch of blurry pixels?

Are Fancams/edits Of Superheroes A Thing In Gotham? Can An Average Gothamite Obtain Materials With Enough
2 months ago
Perhaps I Found The Girlfriend I’ve Been Looking For All Along

Perhaps I found the girlfriend I’ve been looking for all along

6 months ago

I need a fic where all the magic users know that the Champion of Magic is a child so they just start unintentionally co-parenting Billy.

Like, John Constantine will take him on outings to hell. Billy will run off and come back with a piece of Constantine’s soul that had been gambled away and Billy will refuse to explain how he got it.

Dr. Fate (against his better judgment) sets up a playdate between Billy and Klarion the Witch Boy where they are just running around causing chaos (nothing harmful thanks to Billy)

Zatanna lets Billy come to her shows where he’s putting every other audience member to shame with how loud he claps and cheers whenever Zatanna does a trick.

Give me a scenario where magic users are regularly teleporting into the watchtower just to give Captain Marvel a packed lunch, and telling him off —in front of the JL— for forgetting it.


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toobytoobs - Toobytoobs
Toobytoobs

She/HerAutistic, queer, and (according to all the unfinished fics in my docs) an aspiring fanfic author!

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