Undertale Everything’s The Same But Sans’s Lines Are Voiced By Ryan Reynolds

I wish to be perceived as “that thing over there”

Infatuated with weird gender vibes. Reblog if you have weird gender vibes, want weird gender vibes, are also infatuated with weird gender vibes, or would like to have your brain surgically wired to a biohorror mecha.

me: my soul is dark and black nothing brings me joy

*five asks klaus to do the duet with him*

me: THEIR JUST SO CUTE OK

scout, pauling here. the administrator wants me to tell you to stop sending death threats to spy on animal jam. of course she knows. scout these are company computers. no i, no. i don't care if sniper was doing it too. she wants you to stop. look i don't care who started it but she needs you for this job and you have to stop. no, scout. no I don't know how the filters work. just stop talking and listen to me scout. stop it.

joking that an adult character who acts childish doesnt know what sex is will never be as funny as saying the same thing about a big tough murderman videogame protag

isabelle i literally have no idea what you’re talking about

WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT

You know how like squidward hates spongebob right? or acts like it at least

And how in that one spongebob episode when the dude yelled at Spongbob for delivering the pizza late and Squidward basically beat his ass?

hear me out hear me out

The tf2 mercs but with eachother. Theyll yell at eachother and fight and what not but as soon as someone else tries doing that? You better run for the hills

I went on an adventure today to return a pillow to IKEA with my coworker Astrid.

We were having a nice day and got stuck in traffic coming home. On the way her phone rang and she was driving so she declined the call with a sigh. “I feel so bad for him,” she said.

“You know that number?”

She did. It turns out her phone number had previously belonged to a woman named Serena. The man calling was her dad. He had Alzheimer’s and didn’t remember his daughter was dead, so he just called the number he knew was hers.

I was stricken to hear this. “Do you talk to him?”

“Yeah. Sometimes he thinks I’m her and we talk. I have a notebook with facts I’ve learned about her so I can connect with him better. Sometimes he knows I’m not her and I say I’m her friend.”

I struggled with the beauty and humanity of this for a moment. “What’s his name?”

“I don’t know; I just call him Dad.”

We sat in silence and I was overwhelmed with feelings. That she was so kind and thoughtful about this random connection. A man who called and spoke to her with love for the daughter he missed.

"One time," she added, "he called me just after I had a difficult day with my mom. I knew Serena and her mom had a rocky relationship so I talked to him about my frustrations with my own mother and he gave the following advice: ‘Everyone fails sometimes, even parents; what's important is to communicate with our loved ones, even when it's difficult.’

“I have never forgotten that advice and it healed a portion of my heart."