Okay Im On Anon But Only Because This Take Is Too Hot But; Ben Is The Most Shippable Loser Because Everyone

when will i find my emotional support white man

alright kids, so i’m just about finished re-reading IT and i would like to share the bichie highlights with you in case anyone who hasn’t read it is interested. buckle up.

Richie is the only one that Bill confides in about his guilt over Georgie and Richie is very sincere (a rarity) when comforting him.  “What Richie had just said had made him feel better about George’s death for the first time in months…”

This is also the point where Bill begins to cry and feels insecure about it and Richie tells him it’s okay to cry and that he would do the same.

Whatever this is: “Bill was here and Bill would take care; Bill would not let things get out of control. He was the tallest of them, and surely the most handsome. Richie only had to look sideways at Bev’s eyes…to know that. Bill was also the strongest of them - and not just physically. There was a good deal more to it than that, but since Richie did not know either the word charisma or the full meaning of the word magnetism, he only felt that Bill’s strength ran deep and might manifest itself in many ways, some of them probably unexpected. And Richie suspected if Beverly fell for him, or “got a crush him”, or whatever they called it, Ben would not be jealous; he would accept it as nothing but natural.” cont.

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Writing a First Draft

I’ve seen a lot of advice posts that encourage writing a “bad” first draft, or saying that the point of the first draft isn’t to be “good” just to be done, but I have yet to see any examples of what that actually means (which is unfortunate because for a lot of first-time writers that may just mean that their best effort on a first draft isn’t “good enough”), so that’s what I’m here for! The ultimate advocate of ugly writing, babey! Let’s write some “bad” first drafts!!

Forewarning that this is going to be difficult for you perfectionists out there (same hat tho!!!), but really, if you’re looking to finish a first draft within a reasonable time frame (and not continue to rewrite the beginning 50 times to get there, only to be disappointed when the next scenes aren’t as “good” as the beginning), then this really is the way to go. Perfectionism comes in super handy in later drafts, but it’s a real burden in the first draft, and I really really relate to that. What I find that helps keep my perfectionism in check while I’m drafting is to keep a separate Word doc open (or a notebook and pen at hand) to jot down new ideas or things that have changed throughout the draft. Putting a page number down next to the notation will save your life as well. Your future self will thank you!

Okay, so let’s get into it! You have an idea, and you need to get that first draft out before you lose motivation or move on to a shiny new WIP idea. What’s that first draft going to look like?

Write the scenes you’re excited about first. If you’re someone who, like myself, needs to write things in chronological order, then write these scenes in chronological order - but! if you have the conclusion figured out, then write it now, yes, even before that one bit in the middle you’re not sure about. Is it likely that some details in these scenes will change as you keep writing different parts of the book? Yes! Do it anyway! Anything you write will be helpful for later drafts, so write those scenes!!! Plus, if you start with what you’re excited about, you’ll want to keep writing even after they’re finished, because your brain will just keep generating other super cool ideas for those in-between scenes. And yeah, there will definitely be filler scenes to write, but you can probably worry about those in the next draft.

If you’re on a roll, don’t worry about punctuation, grammar, or spelling. I mean it! If those red squiggles in Word bother you, turn them off (they’re really only semi-helpful for editing, and we’re not doing that right now). If you write faster and think better using “internet grammar” (minimal/excessive punctuation, no capitalization, weird spelling, etc.), then do that! If it helps you get words on the page, it’s worth doing.

If you’re not on a roll, try putting some space between what you’ve written and what you need to write. For me, that frequently means hitting enter (even mid-sentence if I suddenly get stuck), typing “monkey,” and then hitting enter again, as many times as it takes for my brain to reboot and remember what the hell I was going for. If that means I have a chain of 20 monkeys in the middle of a paragraph, so be it. They get to hang out there until I come back in draft two and delete them. 

I’ve also written “uhhhhhh” and “oh fuck now what” several times in a first draft. It happens. It’s easier to write in a way that mirrors your thought process, so just do what works. Use memes in your prose to keep it moving - it’ll make future you laugh when you go back through on draft two!

Don’t be afraid to change major pieces of plot - but don’t you dare go back and rewrite earlier pieces to match! Let’s say you’re at the end of act one and you revealed some tragic detail about your MC’s backstory, but now you’re in the middle of act two and you’ve realized that it no longer fits your idea of MC and you no longer want it to be true. Simply make a brief note of it and keep writing like that scene in act one never happened. Deleting, rewriting, and repurposing are all for later drafts! The goal on the first draft is literally just to reach the end - and it’s inevitable that you’ll find and change the story along the way.

Forget about foreshadowing. No matter how detailed of an outliner you are, the fact is that in the first draft you really don’t actually know what’s going to happen yet in your book (see point 5). So forget about trying to foreshadow. Spell out what’s happening plain as day - because the first draft is just one long exposition dump to aide you in future drafts. If you get halfway through and a sudden twist or weird piece of backstory jumps out at you, write it in as if you had foreshadowed, even though you haven’t yet. Make a note of it, and maybe even note where you could foreshadow this in the next few drafts, but keep moving forward. 

Changing perspectives is fine even if it goes against how you know you want your final draft to be. If you have a scene in mind that you know you need to include, but you have no idea how MC would react during it, but you know how your side character would react, write the scene from the side character’s perspective. You can think about MC’s POV in that scene later - again, the point is just to get it written, so if switching POVs gets you through the scene, do it.

Ultimately, this is what people mean when they say your first draft is going to be “ugly.” It’s going to be a little (or a lot) messy. But that’s okay. The struggle of the beginning writer is realizing that your first draft is not going to look like anything you’ve read before - because those are final drafts. And to the gifted writers who breezed through school (like I did) by submitting their first draft essays for grading - that’s not going to work here. Every time you rewrite a piece, it gets better. If you try to make your first draft perfect, you will just end up frustrated and disappointed at the time you wasted, because you’ll end up reworking 80% of it or more in the subsequent drafts. Your writing style will change and improve, and your knowledge will grow, and every time you revisit a draft, that will be reflected.

So write that ugly draft. Insert so many author’s notes mid-paragraph that you look like an early 2000s fanfic writer. Contradict previous scenes like you’re constructing the most elaborate Winchester Mystery House -esque draft the world has ever seen, complete with paragraphs that lead to nowhere and mysterious monkey chains cutting sentences in half. 

And then, in the second draft, make it look as though the first draft never happened.

little things i never want to forget about the hargreeves:

all of them used to defy their father, sneak out to griddy’s, and in five’s own words “eat donuts until we puked. simpler times, eh?”

luther wrote poetry while he was on the moon, especially about comets

tom hopper and the UA crew have said that the scratches all over luther’s body were made by him. he couldn’t stand the loneliness, especially during that first year, and would often resort to harming himself as a way to vent his frustration

it’s also pretty likely that he’s had body dysmorphia at one point or another

he also has a habit of stress eating

diego almost became a detective, but he dropped out because he wasn’t good at following orders. he even went to police academy!!!

diego has the cross stitch grace made specifically for him on the wall of his basement apartment, and in a frame no less

he’s also a big-ass momma’s boy

and he’s the only one grace calls “silly” as a term of endearment

and he has a fear of needles due to getting that tattoo when they were kids (y’all know which one i’m talking about)

plus his stutter only comes out when he’s under extreme emotional stress

and a close rewatch of 1X03 shows that his bedroom had an overflowing abundance of books so what if him and ben used to bond over that😭

allison speaks seven languages

she told her daughter about her siblings, and claire obviously knew them well enough that she was calling them "uncle” and “aunty,” and that last one is especially heartwarming because this was around the time that vanya’s book had just come out, and yet, allison–who has the option of never telling claire about her–still does, and even explains why she wasn’t allowed to go on missions

klaus was smoking blunts at fourteen

klaus was clutching dave’s dogtags right before five teleported all of them to the past

and i’ve noticed that he has a habit of doing that in general in season 2, especially when he’s feeling kind-of low, but sometimes it’s also an unconscious habit and that’s cute, too

klaus would write the things the dead would say to him, all over his bedroom wall

klaus has a habit of going barefoot whenever he’s at home

five was the only person vanya felt comfortable enough with to present new violin pieces to

five outright says that everything he’s done so far was to get back to his family and keep them safe

@me-evil-never​ wrote in the tags: “five has watched his family die/be dead like 3 times if i’m counting correctly (YES YOU ARE AND IT’S A PAINFUL FACT WE MUST ALL LIVE WITH), plus all he has ever done in his life since age 13 was to get back to them so he could spend time safely with them” and YES I AGREE why would you hide such an excellent point in the tags because, sometimes, even i forget that it’s only been two weeks for him, and they’re probably the roughest he’s had since being stuck in the apocalypse as an actual child, and idk about you guys, but i just really want to give five a big hug because lord knows he deserves needs it

allison used to paint klaus’ nails during meals

and was apparently a daddy’s girl, though how one could become a “daddy’s girl” if the father in question was reginald hargreeves is beyond my capacity to understand

ben was reading chekhov as early as 14

ben was a bookworm, both in life and death

vanya had the smallest room

vanya openly called ben the kindest of their siblings in her book, and said that when he died, none of them had any more reason to stay

before he left, diego gave reggie a piece of his mind

all of them know how to dance

they all know how to speak and read greek (ancient fucking greek, as one of you oh-so-eloquently put it)

vanya knows how to speak russian and god knows how many other languages

(by this point i’m really convinced they’re all multilingual and there just hasn’t been an opportunity for them to utilize that yet)

she also has a mr. snuggles teddy bear

according to klaus, vanya used to cry when the others would step on ants as kids

klaus is pansexual

he also dated twins once (though i’m not sure if he dated one then the other or both at the exact same time)

and has mild claustrophobia from being locked up in mausoleums all the time as a child

diego swore a pinky promise with lila and called it “the pinkiest promise” he’d ever make, and even though he’s a hard-ass who won’t hesitate to cut anybody in half, he’s still at his gentlest when he’s around her and he doesn’t even try to hide it

off her meds, vanya got first chair and a solo on her first try (as a violinist in a professional orchestra, lemme tell you that this is no easy feat to do)

she also seemed to have an affinity for bach (again–not easy!!)

even though he was barely out of puberty, ben was smart enough to reprogram allison’s teddy bear to say “luther smells dad’s underwear.”

upon possessing klaus for a few minutes in season 2, ben could be seen clutching various flowers and smelling them repeatedly

klaus can actually levitate in the comics

according to @valkerymillenia, ghost!ben once saved klaus’ life in the comics after he overdosed on heroin yet again

both klaus and diego repeatedly tried to open the lock to vanya’s old anechoic chamber and were absolutely furious when luther wouldn’t let them

diego called elliott “one of ours” despite knowing him for all of a week and a half

he also calls herb “herbie,” calmed him down after accidentally drawing a weapon on him, and created a secret handshake with him, all within two hours tops of meeting him

if one really thinks about it, diego is actually good with people? and that makes sense because he left the academy as early as seventeen, and he would’ve had to talk to a lot of people just to make ends meet that first year alone, and even though reggie tried to squash that part of him down, he’s still a good person at heart, you go prince of pointy things, make us all proud

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a summer day

Richie’s eyes settled on Stan, soft curls, pale features, and the loveliest pink in his cheeks. He was soft-spoken and wise and Richie adored him. Boys weren’t supposed to be pretty but Stanley just was. He was so pretty and so unaware of it, from the tips of his neatly trimmed nails to the top of his mess of sandy-blonde curls. His words were often joking but always had a hint of affection in them. Stanley was rain in june, a bird’s song, the stillness of the ocean early in the morning.

He dragged his eyes over to Beverly, the prettiest girl in the world in his four eyes . She was much more than just a pretty girl though, she was fearless, caring, and so kind it made Richie’s chest ache. Her beauty was not only skin deep, but far deeper. Her firey red hair matched her soul, and the freckles that dotted her face reminded him of the constellations they saw when they star gazed in the fall, her eyes were like diamonds and Richie prayed he’never forget them. Beverly was the warmth of fire, the feeling of the first day of summer, a butterfly in may.

Bill, their fearless leader, the boy that Richie pins as his first love. Auburn hair and scrapped knees, sticking up for his best friends to boys much older and far bigger than he. Bill was an enigma to Richie, a beautiful mix of heroic and humble. He was almost as tall as Richie now and filling out with muscle and richie could hardly breathe anymore. He played baseball so effortlessly and was the best brother to Georgie. Bill was the feeling of snow on christmas morning, the smell of freshly cut grass, the laughter between best friends.

His attention drifted to Mike, god how he loved Mikey. The boy who was once unsure of himself and how he fit into their misfit family now smiled the prettiest smiles and laughed the brightest laughter. His skin shone in the summer sun like nothing else, and his eyes were the loveliest shade of honey. His kind soul and tender touch felt like a taste of heaven on earth. Richie was positive if he’d ever met an angel it was in the form of Mike. Mike was the comfort of a hug, the taste of fresh lemonade, the feeling of tenderness.

Then came Ben, or Ben Handsome as he was so affectionately called. Though he wasn’t the pudgy kid he was a few summers ago, his heart was still as full of the same love and loyalty now. Ben had a way with words like no other, the first to help and the last to go home. Richie admired his beautiful feautures, his newly acquired height, toned muscle, and the mess of soft, dark blonde locks that fell in his eyes every once in a while. Ben was the feeling of a first kiss, a bouquet of roses, the calmness of night.

Eddie, the boy richie teased until he cried from the day they met, a mix of tender affection and the short tempered-ness much like that of a child. His long eyelashes cast shadows in the late afternoon sun, and caught rain in the spring. Eddie, though hot headed, was a sweet boy who’d give the world to make any of his friends smile. His delicate feautures, covered in freckles from the years in the sun, reminded him of home. Eddie was the sunshine after a storm, the sparklers on the fourth of july, the sweetest smile.

Richie was in love, so far gone for the six most important people in his life that it was laughable. A puppet to his emotions, Richie hoped that one day he’d finally be able to tell the deepest and darkest secret to them without them running for the hills. But today, he lays back against the grass and dozes off with Stan’s hand resting idly in his hair and Bev’s legs crossed over his.

---

Sometimes I’ll get really into a show or movie or book or whatever and it’ll be the only thing I post about on my tumblr for weeks

Yes, it is 100% happening rn

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Nobody understands the bond between a girl and the mediocre book she read when she was 13 years old.

I love how the Hargreeves don't give a sh*t for who their siblings love, like, "Vanya is in love with a farm woman with a husband and a son? Well good for her, hope she is happy. Klaus loves a soldier he met in Vietnam that doesn't even no him yet? Kinda sad but adorable bro. Diego is in love with the girl who just tried to kill their entire family? Whatever, hope it works out. Luther is in love with his sister? Well jokes will be made, but you do you man. Five is f*cking a mannequin? Literally the healthiest relationship, call us for the wedding."

Literally the only relationship anyone ever judged was Vanya and Leonard, and they were right.

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Some words to use when writing things:

winking

clenching

pulsing

fluttering

contracting

twitching

sucking

quivering

pulsating

throbbing

beating

thumping

thudding

pounding

humming

palpitate

vibrate

grinding

crushing

hammering

lashing

knocking

driving

thrusting

pushing

force

injecting

filling

dilate

stretching

lingering

expanding

bouncing

reaming

elongate

enlarge

unfolding

yielding

sternly

firmly

tightly 

harshly

thoroughly

consistently

precision

accuracy

carefully

demanding

strictly

restriction

meticulously

scrupulously

rigorously

rim

edge

lip

circle

band

encircling

enclosing

surrounding

piercing

curl

lock

twist

coil

spiral

whorl

dip

wet

soak

madly

wildly

noisily

rowdily

rambunctiously

decadent

degenerate

immoral

indulgent

accept

take

invite

nook

indentation

niche

depression

indent

depress

delay

tossing

writhing

flailing

squirming

rolling

wriggling

wiggling

thrashing

struggling

grappling

striving

straining

WAIT. Not to be controversial but. What if I just enjoy life for what it is right now instead of stressing about what I’ve yet to get out of it. What if I choose to enjoy this time……I know that once it goes, I won’t get it back from anywhere