Deadpool And Wolverine - Blog Posts

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐝𝐲𝐩𝐨𝐨L 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐢e, p2

Deadpool and Wolverine but your Ladypool and an absolute SLUT for Wolverine.

[this is part two to basically what is just my dream. this goes from the last part to the end of the movie and yes there is the car smut scene in the middle. i am not a good smut writer but this is FLITHY, i had to take a step back. enjoy!]

part one

warnings/disclaimer: not proof-read, femreaderxwolverine, sexual content, smut, penetrative sex, oral (m!reciving), spanking, offensive language, cursing, daddy kink, being a whore for the man

The car ride must have gone on for an uncomfortable ten minutes before you broke it.

'So what's with the suit?'

'Drop it,' he warned.

'It's not that bad. It's sexy, in some parts.'

'Stop talking about it.'

'Did you make it yourself?' you asked. 'Did the X-men make you wear it, those fuckers. Friends don't let friends go out looking like they're a godsdamn Wolverine cosplayer.'

'Shut the fuck up about my suit.'

'Watch those frown lines angel baby, personally I'm into the old ragged, sexy, don't get too close to me you'll get hurt, but some miss the 2000's baby they knew.'

'Talk about something else!'

You rolled your eyes, whistling a tune to yourself. When that got boring, you started to mimic Spider-Man. God, what you would give to meet one of him in the void.

'Stop it,' he growled.

You shook your head and gave one last 'thwip'

Then maybe you let slip that it's not a guarantee for him to get his world fixed. And maybe Logan swerves in anger and puts the car in park,

Then maybe Logan gets angry and has a long rant at you about how nobody wants you or loves you and you have to pine over him because you never had a daddy that loved you (you couldn't tell if you were horny or hurt)

'I'm going to fight you now,' you told him.

He snorted. 'oh, are you?' but he wasn't laughing when you punched him square in the nose and a dribble of blood ran down his lips.

He dug his claws into your thigh and you screamed.

He grabbed your hair and slammed your head down on the radio, flicking through some Hugh Jackman hits before you settled on Casual by Chappel Roan.

Honestly, not what you were expecting.

He reached over and strapped you into your seat with the seatbelt and dug his claws deep into your stomach. He smirked in your face as your heavy eyes looked up to him. 'How'd you like that, Bub?'

You had the feeling this was going to take a very different turn. But not without you giving your own back.

He lunged in again for you but you retracted the seat and lifted a leg to his shoulder, kicking him away from you.

'I have to say, this isn't the way I imagined you in between my legs.' Still, you used the power of your thighs to slam him repeatedly into the door, until he stabbed you again.

You kicked him in the chest, sending him flying out the windshield.

You unbuckled the seat belt and smirked, ushering him back with your fingers.

Smut. Smut. Smut. Honda Odyssey smut. Smut. Smut. Smut. Honda.

When he lunged back in and dug his claws into your ribs, you hadn't expected him to kiss you, forcing his lips to mold into yours. His teeth bit down on your lip, opening up your mouth a moan and diving his tongue in.

He took out his knives and you pulled your head back to yell out in pain, even though they were already healing. And even if the yell of pain was more like a moan. 'Oh, you like that bub?'

You roll your head to look at him. 'Is that a claw in your pants or are you just happy to see me?'

He growls. Fucking growls and wraps a hand around your throat, squeezing until you open your mouth wide enough for him to shove his tongue in again. Your legs wrap around his waist, forcing his hips down to yours until you could feel the outline of his cock against your pussy.

When he pulls away, dragging you bottom lip with him, he spits into your mouth. 'All those filthy things you'd been spitting at me, think you can take it, bub?'

'Ha, let's see if you've got it in you, old man.' With the power of your thighs wrapped around him, you spun until you had him pinned under you.

For good measure, you punched him in the face again, blood coming to stain his perfect lips. Logan only grinned. He grabbed a fist full of your hair and pulled until the expanse of your neck was vulnerable to him. He bit down on your neck like a vampire in need for blood. He drew blood and there was nothing more sinful to you than when he pulled back and revealed a slither of your blood from the corner of his lips.

You licked at his lips, taking your blood.

His hands found your breasts under the suit and squeezed, groaning to himself at the feel of them. 'Why have a mouth, when you have these?'

'I'm sure my mouth can come in handy too, handsome.'

He chuckled and lifted your hips enough and then forced you back down on him until you were grinding down on his cock through your suits. His teeth grazed your nipples through the leather, tongue working against it. It was like another layer of skin.

You gripped his hair, moaning as you rocked your hips into him. Slowly, he took the zipper between your breasts and pulled it down until it revealed you in a lacy red bra.

'Of fucking course,' he groaned, lips wrapping around a nipple, teeth pulling on it as his palm reached out to give attention to your other one. All the while your panties (which you couldn't wait for him to see the colour of) grew damper the more you moved against him. Even you could see pre-cum staining his suit.

'Fuck, Wolvie,' you groaned.

'I know, bub. You just needed some attention, ay. Just needed big old me.'

You looked down at him, his saliva running down your breasts. 'Well, is it true? Are you Hugh down under?'

He smirked and pushed you off him just enough so he could un-zip his pants and free his cock. It slapped against the leather of his suit, the tip red and swollen, begging for your attention. 'What do you think?'

'Mama like,' you mumble, falling to your knees in the passenger seat. Yes, the passenger seat.

He wrapped your hair around his hand and pulled until you loomed over his cock. 'Gonna do something useful with that mouth, baby?'

'What? Like recite the opening of deadpool two?'

With enough chatter, Logan forced you down on his cock. He didn't wait for you to adjust and he seemed to not need to as you took control quickly.

He groaned when you swirled your tongue over his tips and then licked up and down like it was a popsicle. When you took him all the way until you were choking around him and hollowing your lips. He was bucking his hips up to you, chuckling and moaning at you.

'Oh, yes, bub, just like that- just like that,' he pulled at your hair as you took all of him in, hands messaging his balls. 'Bet you want me to tell you you've been a good girl, eh? Oh, you'd love that baby, but you haven't. You've- fuck just like that- you're a fucking lair, aren't you. Wanted me so bad you had to use that filthy mouth of yours to lie?'

You moan around him and bobbed the tip in your mouth, using your hands for what you couldn't take.

Logan's head rested back on the car seat as he bucked up into you and into you.

Your thighs squeezed together, your hand itching to help yourself out.

'You touch yourself bub and I'll have to spank you,' he threatened.

You immediately spread your legs and slide your fingers down the band of your panties.

Logan pulled you from his dick and all but forced you back up. The two of you fumbled with the zip of your pants, hitting your head in the process.

He caught sight of your panties once he'd pulled your leather pants down enough. Yellow. 'Oh you're fucking kidding me.'

You laugh. 'Well, when I knew I'd be seeing you I got pretty a little bit.'

His eyes were still trained on the panties that matched his suit. 'A little bit, huh? Shame I'm gonna have to ruin them.'

His claws came out and you shivered as the sharp blade slid down your stomach. 'Does this turn you on, baby? The blade, the pain. Fuck.' He used the tip to slice through your panties. When they fell away, he crumpled them in his palm and brought them to his face, to sniff them.

You moaned, hands on his shoulders. 'Oh you fucking animal.'

'Oh, you don't know the half of it bub.'

He took your hips and slowly- because no matter the heat and sweat between you- you'd need to take him in slowly. Your pussy sunk down on his tip and you both groaned, clutching onto each other. He watched as his tip disappeared into your folds.

'God, we should've done this in the bar,' you groaned. 'Or when I saw you in that patch.'

'What?' he asked.

'Nothing.' You perched yourself on his shoulder and sunk down deeper.

His jaw clenched, trying to keep in his groans as your walls clenched around him. 'Fuck, bub, you're so tight. God, bet that ex back home has never taken you the way you need, huh?'

You pull yourself back up, only to sink back into him. You repeat, until you bottom out on him, thighs to thighs, his balls resting on your ass.

Logan moaned, biting down on your neck as his hands wrapped around and cupped your ass, spreading your ass cheeks to fit in better. Then, he slapped the leather and the sound must have gone through the entire forest. 'This is what you wanted huh?'

You nodded, lifting yourself up and down on his cock, walls fluttering every time. You moan his name.

He slaps your ass one more time. 'Call me Wolverine.'

You moan it out.

'There's my good girl. Count for me, baby.' With each slap he gave your red leather ass, you moaned a number and every time you got it wrong, he slapped you in the face.

You got it wrong many a time.

You rode him like a cowgirl. 'Shit, fuck, Wolvie I'm gonna. I'm gonna.'

He laughed and left your ass alone and played with your clit, sending you over the edge. 'Fuck!' neither of you had anything left to say as you both came, him shooting his seed inside of you while your juice ran down his cock.

The both of you were a sweaty mess, hair sticking to your foreheads. It took you a while of catching your breath before you carefully moved from his cock, your walls clenching to get the last bits of him inside. He groaned.

You fell back in the seat next to him. 'I take it all back, the Honda Odyssey fucks hard,' you turn your head to consider Logan. 'Shame you don't, old man.'

He growled, turning to you. 'Oh, we're just getting started, bub.'

Smut done. Go seek Jesus. Go drink some holy water. Go cool off.

Back to our regular scheduled programme.

Once the two of you were done Logan had you tied up in seat belts, kinky, but also to keep your hands off him. Neither of you had any idea you'd been moved until you woke in a bed, moaning Logan's name.

Logan was over in the corner drinking, the arms of his suit ripped off from your activities.

'Oh, arms out. What's next, tits?'

Then, walked out the 'others' Johnny. Elektra. Blade. Gambit!

You could've sworn you heard boss music somewhere.

'And who's this succulent man? You should've been in the car earlier,'

'My name is Remmy, but you can call me Gambit.'

'I'm so sorry beautiful, I want this to be gentle but who is your dialect coach, the minions? I feel like we're missing critical exposition here.'

'There's four of us,' Elektra told you.

'Four of you? Who's the fourth? Is it Magneto? Dear please god let it be young Magneto!'

'Magneto's dead.'

'Fuck!'

Then the fourth was revealed. Laura. X-23 'Holy shit, Logan, that's her, that's X-23.'

But the man carried on drinking.

'Even our sweet baby angel Johnny Storm went missing two days ago,' the Gambit told you.

'Oh I am so sorry. Whoever this Johnny is I'm sure he's doing well. And looking even better.'

Together, the five of you worked together to work out what to do, how to take Cassandra down, excited by the idea.

'Let's fucking go!' said Laura.

You cheered. 'Let's fucking go!'

'You're all fucking dead.'

You whip around to him. 'My god, Gorgeous, read the room.'

Later that night, you finally had the season three emotional opening act, Logan opening up to Laura about what really happened to the X-men in his world. It was tragic. Really it was.

As Laura left, you replaced her seat.

He grumbled, taking a swig of the bottle as you pulled off your mask, getting a look at him. 'I'm not in the mood, bub.'

So, unlike you, you didn't make any innuendos. Instead, you slowly wrapped an arm around his shoulder and even slower, he rested a head on your shoulder and you settled for that.

So the six of you- yes, including Wolvie from the boot- made your superhero opening.

You and Wolverine made it to the British villain two, were very quickly, she knocked you out.

'Finally, nice to give someone else a chance to talk,' said Cassandra.

'Not my strong suit,' said Logan, who was just as quickly overpowered. Cassandra thrust his claws into the ground, forcing him on all fours.

You woke up just to take a picture of that.

Cassandra looked into Logan's brain; beyond all that pain, there was something else. 'My, my, what did you get up to in that car?'

But she never got to find out as you- who had woken whilst Logan distracted her- and slammed Juggernot's helmet over her.

'Only I'm allowed to mess with his head, bitch,' you said.

'Damn right,' he grumbled.

You blushed like a schoolgirl. 'Finally!'

In the end, Logan had to be noble and take the helmet from her to save her life, only to be the man Charles wanted,

But god was it a powerful speech that left both of you speechless. In the end, your arms dropped but the two of you still got through the portal in time to get back to your universe.

The two of you crashed down onto a car, the kids gasping that it was Ladypool and Wolverine.

'Fox killed him, Disney brought him back. They're gonna make him do this until he's ninety!'

The two of you ran back to the subway base that was really the TVA, but got gate-crashed by both villains.

'Oh, so this is a foursome thing now?'

Cassandra sent you flying through a shop window for that.

When the two of you got back up, the portal was still open and, to your delight, dogpool ran back out, straight to your arms. You caught her and let her lick all over your mask despite the filthy things Logan did to it.

'There's my girl, we never have to be parted ever again,' you told her.

'Sorry!' Nicepool ran out.

'Fuck off! Cafe gratitude. Right, that's it girl, who's it gonna be, Van Wilder here or sexy hot mama?'

'Ha, that's funny, I can gently tap the fourth wall to,' said Nicepool 'Are you Hugh down under part two.'

'Thank you very much, Nicepool,' you said.

'Both of you shut up. I smell a lot of you,' said Logan.

From the portal, walked out a hundred deadpools. Including deadpool prime (whatever that was) kidpool, welshpool, oldpool, greatestshowmanpool.

First, you and Wolvie ran, using Nicepool as a cover, turns out he doesn't regenerate.

Then, you and Wolverine walked out together looking fucking awesome, which only got cooler when Logan pulled up his cowl.

'Woah, wish you'd shown me them in the car. Hey, what's the wind resistance on those blow job handles.'

'Find out later, Bub,'

You were so wet.

When the two of you made it down to the reactor, to stop Cassandra, it was you or him for the final noble sacrifice and to hell if you were gonna let him win.

Before Logan could close the door, you hit him over the head and locked him out.

'No!'

'Sorry babe, I can't hear you over all my noble sacrifice!'

'Why are you fucking doing this?' he yelled.

'Because. I am... Iron man.'

You made some rude gestures to him before you walked away to save the world.

And you were so close, so close to winning it all. You had one reactor, all you needed was the other but you were running out of time.

You would've if it wasn't for Logan grabbing your hand and finishing the chain.

The power ripped his shirts to shred and you stared unashamed of how much you stared.

'Who greased up those delicious hawian rolls?'

'In stopping her, yes, yes I was! But not as much as the man and woman who went down there after her! My man and woman, my friends. I warned them that they'd be obliterated if they went but they went anyway. Like heroes. Because that's who they were, they did what they had to do with no concern for their own safety. The fact we are still standing here is a testament to their bravery. Anyway there's nothing you or I can do to bring them back now,' said Paradox.

'He hath risen, babygirl!'

'Fuck!'

You and Logan walked out. Well, Logan walked out, you were on his back getting a piggy back ride while everyone drooled at the sight of Wolverine,

'And we're doing just fine you piece of shit,' said Logan.

Everyone agreed.

Logan let you down but you dragged your hands dramatically down his abs as he did.

A lady offered him a hoodie but you quickly stole it and cut it up before he had a chance to cover up.

Because of all your good deeds, you were allowed to take Logan home with you, and he was happy to join,

You even got Laura back for him and dogpool so you could all be a family.

You and Logan fucked like rabbits that night.

taglist (thank you!): @allmyn1ghts, @nonamevenus, @pink-jello-fish, @maneskinwh0re, @chaoticcreatorbluebird, @shakysif, @groovycass, @geeksareunique, @gotta-go-now

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐝𝐲𝐩𝐨𝐨L 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐢e

Deadpool and Wolverine but your lady pool and an absolute SLUT for Wolverine.

[this is a complete self insert with just everything I was thinking about during the movie and since then I’ve watched it three times. It gets better every time. Snippets of the movie, will probably do a part two. SPOILERS!]

part two

Warning/disclaimer: femreaderxwolverine, sexual content, sexual language, offensive language, just being a whore the man, cursing, repeat daddy issues, never proof-read.

After digging up Logan and expecting to find a shirtless and oiled-up Hugh Jackman, you were a little more than disappointed to find the bones and metal. 'Damn it! Shit! Fuck! They Les Mis'd him!'

Eventually, you settled down next to the remains, against the same log that had impaled him. 'That was weird,' you chuckled. 'I'm much calmer now. Look, I'm not a woman in stem but you seem incredibly dead to me. Oh, you sexy lump of bones and metal. I would have let you slide them into me any day.'

'But it's good to see you,' you pat his knee. 'I gotta be honest, I've always wanted to ride you, Logan. Oh, whoops, I meant with you. Ha! Who am I kidding, no I didn't. Just you and me, getting into it. And I mean into it. Every style. Doggy. Sixty-nine. On the kitchen counter to the bathroom. Till my back broke. Yea, we'd have been good together.' You ranted, fantasies flying across your mind too quick to focus on one.

With your red-gloved hand, you jerk the chin. 'G'day mate, there's nothing that'll bring me back to life faster than a big bag of Marvel cash. Ha- I hear you, Hugh. But no, no, no, no you had to go and get all noble and die for real. I could really use your help right now. And a massage. Your big manly hands just rubbing all over me-'

Just as you were about to go into further detail about what you want him to do to you, the sound of portals opening and heavy boots stomping closer alerted you.

Quickly, you pulled the skeleton down on top of you.

'There are two hundred and six bones in the body. Two hundred and seven if i'm watching Van Helsing.'

Que the fucking montage.

You have a mission. Find a Logan to take back with you. First up you end up in a bar, catching an axe as it was thrown at you. 'Logan! I'm gonna need you to come with me.'

The Logan sitting at the bar slowly turned to you. 'Who's asking? ' He slipped from the bar stool to reveal a 5'3 Logan.

You coo. 'Well, who's this little ankle biter. Did you stick the landing little guy? Yes you did, comic-accurate short king. Such a cute little Wolvie.'

The little guy started stalking toward you.

'Que the fucking montage.'

You found a Wolverine for the seventies, or eighties, something close enough to that, one hand missing. 'Oh yea, sexy, you have anchor being written all over you.'

You found patch Logan. 'Oh hello, Patch. Should've worn my white suit.'

You found another old man Logan, sitting solemnly on his front porch. 'Howdy! Oh, I see, you're the daddy issues one. Good to see god has answered my prayers. So soldier, do I need to be a bad girl so you put me over your knee, daddy?'

Another was tied to a cross with red bloody skulls acting as a floor.

One was dressed in a tight yellow and brown suit, walking through the woods. 'Hubba hubba. Classic! Now, you fought the Hulk in this suit, right?' as he snicked his claws out, the green of the beast reflected from behind you. 'I am Marvel Jesus you dull creature and I will not be-'

One, your favourite, was working on a bike in a tight white vest and dark pants. You drooled. 'That's the whole goddamn package right there. You know from behind you look a bit- holy Shit!' he turned, and everything about him was Wolverine. Except for the fact he was Henry fucking Cavil. 'The Cavalry has arrived. The prophecy has been fulfilled. Can I say, sir, sorry, daddy- on behalf of all of humanity, this just feels right! We will treat you so much better than those shit fucks down the street!'

He took the cigar from his mouth, stalking to you. You had never been so aroused in your life. 'You were just leaving'

Giggling and twirling your hair, you hold a hand out, ghosting over his chest. 'Can I just, one- one touch. Oh my god! You're like Superman or something.'

He punched you right into the Logan you needed. Thank you Cavil.

'You two gonna fuck or fight?' asked the bartender. 'Both if i'm lucky,' you said.'

'Oh look at those sexy little jammies, that only took twenty fucking years!'

The trash heap was the last place you wanted to end up, but when you woke to Logan looming over you, a snarl on his face, you sighed in relief.

'Well, hello sexiest man alive, 2008. Wanna give me a hand? Or head?'

He sniked his claws out.

'Kinky! That's new for Disney!'

He dug his claws into your ribs and dragged you up with them. 'Where the fuck are we?'

'I dunno, but it looks a bit mad maxxy to me. But that would be IP infringement right?'

'Fucking jokes,' Logan uttered. He threw you over his leg, your back breaking.

'Till my back breaks, Wolvie!' you yelled out, quickly rolling yourself back up and shaking it off. 'Look, I think we got off on the wrong foot. I'm a big fan. How about we strip off our suits, take a tumble in the sand, get to know one another you know. Personally, I'm more of a cowgirl fan but I'm willing to do whatever you want baby.'

'You're unbelievable,' he grumbled. It was still sexy. He turned his back to you.

'Oh, I see, is that what you did when your world went to shit!'

He paused, his head slowly turning to you. 'Say again, bub?'

'Oh, I am so horny right now.'

The two of you engaged in a fight, and not the sexy stradling fight that would happen later, but the guns firing, swords slashing kind of fight. that was only interrupted by a familiar voice.

The only other voice that could have you dropping your panties as quick as Wolverine. He was hooded, hidden, but you knew him from your sex dreams.

'Dear god almighty, it's him.'

'Who?' growled Logan.

'Don't be jealous baby, I have two holes for a reason. Don't worry gorgeous, you're gonna encounter some delicate language, a smidge of ass play but we've been prohibited from using cocaine, at least on page.'

He raised a hand. 'They're coming.'

'Who's they?'

The three of you watch cars and trucks drive through the waste, keeping you trapped. There were familiar faces, Pyro, Toad. And Sabertooth.

The mysterious figure jumped down and mastered the superhero landing that had you clapping your hands and jumping up and down.

'Oh my god! Oh my god!' you held onto Logan's shoulder as you jumped while he just glared at you.

'I've got this,' the man takes down his hood, showing the beautiful, hot, strong, handsome, hubba-hubba worthy, Chris Evans.

'Oh yes, you do sexiest man alive, 2022!' you cheer.

'Stay close,' Chris- or Steve- called back to you.

You stalk over to him. 'Aye aye, Captain.' you wrap your arms around his stomach, fingers trailing over his abs. He removes you and you groan, sulking. You walk back to Wolverine and jump onto the side of his hip.

Instinctively he holds your ass which makes you giddy before he realises his mistake and drops you.

'You're not gonna love what happens next,' shouted the captain.

Your jaw dropped from behind the mask. 'Holy shit, omg! No way, he's gonna say it! He's gonna say it!' you flick one of your swords that was still poking out of Wolverine's chest. 'Avengers-'

'Flame on!' Steve- no, Johnny- yelled and took to the skies in a ball of fire.

It was sort of stupid in hind sight as Pyro lifted a hand and extinguished him, causing him to fall from the skies and go crotch first into a billboard.

'No!' you screamed, rushing to him and rolling onto his back to get a look at him. 'No, no baby, stay with me. Let me take a look!' you tried to pull down his pants but Logan literally pulled you off him.

You were tied up with Wolverine on the front side of you and Johnny on the back. When you woke, you giggled. 'Woah, just like my dreams.'

Johnny woke to, lifting his head from your shoulder. 'How long was I out?'

You smirk under the mask, looking back to him. 'Not all of you was asleep, say Cap, is that a Glock in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

'Is that Chuck? Hey Chuck, over here! Hope it's you young, god, we got James Macovy in this?' you yelled as a wheelchair rolled out as you entered the thing that was apparently large Paul Rudd.

'Cassandra Nova. Charles's twin,' the villain introduced herself.

'Holy shit,' said Logan.

'How was anal birth?' you asked.

Cassandra smirked. 'You two are cute. I have a good feeling about this.'

'Right!' you cheered. 'Just wait till this ends, the smut is off the charts!'

She took the chain from around the two of you but you wrapped yourself around Logan's arm, he only grunted at you. He only pushed you off when you started to go off and off about what Johnny said about Cassandra. 'People think i'm a shit talker but this guy-' you chef's kiss. 'Next level!'

Cassandra, with a flick of her hand, shed the skin from him as he fell in a heap of bones and blood and skin,

You cried out, holding onto Logan for dear life. 'My favourite Chris!'

'You silly little bitch, you just got him fucking killed!' yelled Logan.

'Fine, spank me then! P.S. Do you know what he was doing to the budget!'

You were brought to Ultimatum with Cassadra, Oliath or the other British villain, but all you wanted was to save your world, bang Wolvy and go home.

'I didn't want it to come to this, either you help us or my boyfriend here is gonna perform the whole of Greatest Showman as a one-man show,' you warn.

'I'm not her boyfriend,' Logan grumbled.

Cassandra went on a trauma dump that had you groaning. 'Couldn't you just turn into accomplishment like the rest of us?'

But I'm not like the rest of you, except maybe the Wolverine, now we could be truly terrifying together.'

'Sorry lady, he's taken!'

'Not for long,' Cassandra smirked and as Logan attacked, she sent him in the ground and away from you. You only whined at his disappearance, a whine that turned into a groan when Cassandra's fingers entered you in the worst way possible. Through your head.

'What can I see here?' she asked. Cassandra gasped. 'Oh, you are a whore.'

Oh yes, she saw the million filthy things you wanted to do to Logan.

The two of you made it out and to the diner where Logan was intent on finding food and taking rubbing alcohol shots. When he sat across from you, chucking a tin of spam at you, you pulled of your mask.

Logan stilled, looking at you with finally something a little different than anger.

'What?' you asked.

'I thought you'd be ugly under there.'

'No- no, that's the Deadpool. I'm better, and a self-insert.'

The two of you took to walking through the rather nicer side of the waste. You had his hand in yours, swinging it happily like you were a couple before he threatened to chop your hand off.

'You said Logan was a hero, what happened?' he asked.

'You died. Technically you were chest fucked by a tree, but really you just ran out of batteries trying to save this girl- a kid really. Always wanted a man who's good with kids. The shit heels who grew her in a lab called her x-23, but she was just a kid. A smaller, cute and mean version of you. Yep, you saved her, very hero, very demure.'

The two of you were interrupted when a bark sounded over the hill and the BEST DOG EVER ran out to you, ears flapping in the wind, tongue out as it always was. The little boots. The collar. It was Dogpool.

You threw off your mask and picked her up, cuddling her close. 'She's coming with us.'

'No she's not!' he argued.

'Yes, she is!'

'No!'

You pulled out your puppy dog eyes and lifted the dog to your face and slowly the resolve in his face slipped.

'Sorry!' another man ran out, chasing after the dog.

'Fucking shit bag!' you cursed.

It was another dead pool, a good-looking one with long hair.

'What's Ryan Reynolds actually doing here, I thought I replaced him?' you said.

'In here everyone calls me Nicepool.'

'Can we have your dog?' you asked immediately.

He laughed. 'over my dead body!'

You nod, thinking about it but Logan holds out his arm before you can even move.

Whatever Nicepool was saying was you didn't care as you cooed and hugged the dog closer and Logan watched.

Fuck, he was paying attention to you.

'Why are you so nice?' you asked eventually.

'It costs nothing to be kind,' he said.

'Shutting the fuck up is also free,' said Logan.

You bite your lip in his direction. 'God I am so attracted to you right now. This is Logan, he's usually shirtless but he's let himself go since the divorce.'

Finally, the Nicepool took you to his ride to get you and Logan and the dog to the borderlands.

It was a honda fucking odyssey.

Logan wasn't willing to listen to your complaints. 'Get in the fucking car.'

'Make me, Daddy,' you said.

He took one step closer to you and you backed away with the dog. 'No, we're running away!'

Logan forced her from your arms and handed him back to the Nicepool.

'The corn was to dense girl!' you called after her, pouting.

Logan shoves you into the passenger seat while he takes the wheel.

You pull of your mask, hair falling around you like you were in an advert. 'So, what shall we do to pass the time...'

Honda Odyssey coming soon, that my friends, is called edging.

URGENT HELP SAVE THE LIFE OF MY CHILD

Dear humanity,

Please Help Me – My Son May Die at Any Moment.

I'm Amal, a mother of three children, living under the weight of the genocide taking place in Gaza. 🍉

Here’s my story, and I’m reaching out with a hopeful heart 💔✨, hoping someone will feel what my family and I are going through.

My son is suffering from a severe and life-threatening injury after being shot by Israeli drones. He urgently needs medical treatment outside Gaza.

Time is running out, and we are facing a critical situation. I am asking for your generosity to help us save him either through a donation or by sharing this urgent plea with others

I beg you, i kiss your feet, to help my son. My son may die at any moment

I lost most of my family. I'm afraid to lose my son too 🥺

Mohammed deserves to live a happy and healthy life, just like every other child on this earth.

So I humbly ask you to donate even a little or at least reblog this appeal.

Please Donate now:👇

https://gofund.me/2f20a398

Ddonate Via Paypal 👇

https://www.paypal.com/donate

PLEASE HELP IF YOU CAN!!!

you know that one team member who takes all the credit but does none of the work

I do draw traditionally (sometimes)

Drawing Scott the way God intended

Have a Gambit

a WIP for your troubles

And have a bonus Gambit

Some of my favorite homosexual's

the gays

Introduction post!

My name is EL and my pronouns are he/him.

My Fandoms;

Batjokes

DC in general tbh

Deadpool and wolverine

Spiderman

Deadplate

Jujutsu kaisen

Sonic

Beastars

Arcane

My Hero Academia

I reblog anything I find funny and cool art I find.

This whole blog is just a mess of my Fandoms and interests so I promise absolutely no consistency ever.

I might post some art eventually :]

Did a silly lil water color unrelated to any movie i may have watched recently

Y/N being obsessed with Wolverine

WARNING: SPOILERS IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE MOVIE SAVE AND READ LATER ;)

Warning: Dirty flirting

Wade and Y/N go way back so when he’s captured by the TVA she ends up with him. 

OK so maybe she’s like his sidekick.

She has the same suit but sexier.

Through all the jumps to different Wolverines Y/N is thrilled by the handsome man. 

Wade has always known that she found him attractive. 

When they get to the “right” one she immediately flirts with him.

“Wow, aren't you like the sexiest man alive?” She flirts.

Deadpool looks at her through his mask like “bitch,really?” 

Logan snorts at her and finishes his drink.

Seeing him in his suit? Oh she’s in love. 

She runs his fingers up his muscles and sighs, “Made in heaven.” 

Logan raises his eyebrow at her and turns to Deadpool, “She’s like you but hotter.” 

He called her hot? Oh she gets more handsy. 

Even though she’s Deadpool's sidekick she stays out of the fights between them and is the one that breaks them up.

“You’re supposed to be my sidekick! Just because you want to fuck him doesn’t mean that title goes away.” Wade tells her.

“If he wasn’t here right now I would do the nastiest things to you.” She purrs. 

He looks at her up and down and considers it. 

“I heard that!”

When Deadpool wraps his arms around Johnny, Y/N does the same with Wolverine.

“You’re so buff and muscular. It’s hard to keep my hands off ya.” 

Cassandra gets inside Y/N’s mind and calls her a whore. 

Y/N smirks at Wolverine, “Only for you big boy.”

“Well since you don’t wanna join them in taking her down, Can I suck your dick?” 

Her suit gets nearly shredded and both Deadpool and Wolverine stare at her body, “If you don’t fuck her, I will.” Wade says. 

Wolverine snorts at that.

Seeing Wolverine with his mask nearly made her cum, “And here I was thinking that you couldn’t get hotter. I was wrong.” She sighs, dreamily.  

She cried when she thought she lost both her bestie and her dream man. 

But when he came out shirtless that thought went away. 

“Oh baby you’re gonna have to fuck me soon. I don’t know how long I can take it.” She says.

He chuckles and takes off his mask.

He pulls her into a kiss and she happily accepts.

Deadpool rolls his eyes as the kiss gets deeper, “Okay we get it! You guys wanna fuck. Disney won’t allow that.” 

Y/N breaks the kiss with a love sickening smile.

Wolverine looks down at her with the same look. 

“Ok fuckheads. Let’s get going!” Deadpool says.

Both of them sigh but walk hand in hand.

“You take good care of her and no babies until after marriage.” Logan rolls his eyes. 

“No promises friendo. We are fucking like rabbits tonight.” She smirks at him.

so proud of our boys <3333 they’re on the big screen!!!!!

i didn’t actually hear slash in the movie or the credits though? am i going insane did anyone find where it was/if it was there

marvel fans/stays we were SO CLOSE 😭😭

I’ll admit it the Deadpool and Wolverine movie affected me more than I thought it would

this burger is like a prayer

Yeaaaah.....

The worst story about that : I live in a country where it doesn't usually happen, so that's even worse. I brought ticket to go see Deadpool and wolverine with a (now ex) friend. They were on their phone so much. Like, I bought the tickets, but I didn't force them to go, I asked them several times if they wanted to go see the movie. The LEAST they could do was to NOT be on their phone. What's even worse with that is I have ADHD.... Like, strongly, and ok, when I'm watching a movie at home, I'm always on my phone, but not in the freaking movie theater? Like? It's dark for a reason? What's the reasoning? 'oh yeah I'm probably autistic so I need my phone on all the time' ? Seriously....

ppl are rlly trying to defend being on your phone during a movie in the theater what is going on

forgot to post this yesterday but the thought still counts!! HAPPY MOVIE RELEASE DAYYYYY

Welp this is definitely the beginning of a X-men/hughjackman/wolverine phase. Get ready for this one. It’s only begun

okay who else loves HughJackman/Wolverine, and is excited for the new movie???? Cmon Hugh the legendJackman is back as Wolverine. LETS GO!

Something something, living rent free in my mind and such, anyway I love them.

i’m telling you this shit isn’t even a joke anymore

broke: channing tatum sucks at a french accent

woke: gambit is cajun. cajuns just sound like that man. idk what to tell you. iirc he even got “sha” right (as opposed to the french pronunciation of chère). he doesn’t sound the way his dialogue is portrayed in the comics bc in the comics they just threw in some chère’s and some non’s and called it a day. channing tatum had the accent DOWN PAT

I’m watching the Ryan Reynolds & Hugh Jackman puppy interview and the question “what’s your love language?” comes up… RYAN RESPONDED WITH “unblinking violence on camera” DEADPOOL AND WOLVERINE IS A GAY LOVE STORY BETWEEN WADE AND LOGAN AND NO ONE CAN CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE!!!!!

GUESS WHO'S A SECRET X-MEN FAN

THIS GUYYY!! 😋

Sorry for the lack of posts, just started my intern work at a secondhand store, days are BUSY

Guess what movie I just watched