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In the past few weeks, turning on the news every day is another sensation of “Yep. Been there, done that. What else is new?”
I’m talking about sexual assault. All the recent publicity and endless accusations from women - what do you think we’ve been putting up with since the beginning of time? I’m grateful for the actual acknowledgement - it’s about time women were heard, and our society started working toward a safer future. But I can’t help feeling bitter that it’s taken this long. No matter where she was, what she did, or what she looked like, every woman from every time period has had to fear the kind of behavior. Maybe there was less risk than in other places, but across centuries and miles and nations, it has been a collective fear. It isn’t our fault, our actions, our clothes, it’s because we live in a society where women have less of a worth. In a society that has made us have less of a worth.
I often wonder what actually goes through the mind of the man assaulting or raping a woman. We say we don’t want it, we tell you no, but still you keep coming. It’s frightening. It’s disturbing. The behavior being broadcasted recently makes us feel unsafe and confused. Why would you do something to someone, when your actions are clearly having a negative impact on the person? Why is it so difficult to grasp the basic human indecency it takes to not heed other’s reactions, and therefore the severity of this problem? You wouldn’t hit a little kid when he clearly didn’t welcome the action. But you would do something much more intimate with a woman?
And that’s just the thing: “with a woman.” Sexual assault and rape everywhere should be a no-no. It shouldn’t just be about women and our rights - but it is, and that makes the battle that much harder, hence my statement from earlier. Women and girls everywhere are told to change their behavior - their own, not that of their attacker! - to avoid being violated in such a way. We are taught that it is our fault - not that of a world where the wrong lessons are taught to children. Such societal messages are exactly why there are ignorant, arrogant men in power, and why they make the mistakes women are blamed for. A cycle that must be broken.
We can blame men all we want - and some definitely deserve it. But what the most recent accusations show, the “newest” revelation is that our society is to blame. Women have less of a say, but men are also held to such low expectations. We must work together - men and women, assaulted and accused - to raise the next generation so that they’ll make the world safer and more equal for all. Let’s teach them to do better than we have.