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GIVEN | Ugetsu Murata Character Deep Dive
Ugetsu Murata is one of my absolute favourite characters out of any anime and manga because as a composer and musician, I can relate to his struggles on a spiritual level. I thought it might be kind of fun to really see how much we can try and understand this beautiful and flawed individual who is still very very deserving of love and a happy ending.
Ugetsu's Personality
Nonchalant and aloof exterior but extremely sensitive interior
Pivots between being a bit needy and dismissive, hot and cold
When it comes to the topic of music, he is extremely honest, sometimes a bit brutally honest.
Finds it hard to verbalise his true needs and wants - constantly self-sabotages.
Basically a walking human contradiction
Ugetsu and music is a matter of SURVIVAL
Let's first talk about Ugetsu's relationship with music. Ugetsu is an exceptional violinist deemed by others as having bestowed with genius talent. Everyone, including Akihiko and later of course Mafuyu when they go and attend one of Ugetsu's concerts are absolutely mesmerised by the way he plays and connects with the music. Everyone is so incredibly moved by the way he plays because
Ugetsu can be his authentic himself when he plays the violin.
For those few minutes on stage, Ugetsu doesn't need to hold back and can show people his emotions, his sensitivity, his overwhelming vulnerability and feelings for the world, he can let it all out because holding it in, would have probably killed him.
When Ugetsu says that he wanted to be with Akihiko but he's in love with music. What he really means is that music is his source of life, without it, he simply can't live. As an artist, I can actually really relate to that. Sometimes the overwhelming feelings of emotions need to be turned into art or music, there needs to be an outlet, it's unhealthy to actually keep it all in. We must understand that for Ugetsu, playing music is a matter of SURVIVAL otherwise his emotions all become a bit too much.
Ugetsu as we have established is an incredibly sensitive person. He knew that the relationship with Akihiko was suffocating the both of them because he realised how much his playing held back Akihiko as a person. Akihiko consciously or subconsciouly began to dedicate himself entirely to Ugetsu's happiness and lost his own drive and passion as a person. Ugetsu picks up on this so he began to also hold back (consciously or subconsciously) on how freely he could express himself with his music, which I believe became terrible for his own mental health. Music for Ugetsu is a form of therapy.
While he continued to provoke Akihiko to take music seriously again, he could tell when Akihiko was not confident in his playing knew he had to put an end to it. He knew it was bad for the both of them.
Ugetsu and the loneliness of the Genius
While music is just naturally a matter of emotional outlet and survival for Ugetsu, other people put him on a pedestal. Overwhelmed by the intensity of his emotions and playing, the audience cannot see him simply as a human being but as a genius. This is why, Ugetsu although admired by all and envied by all, we don't really see him get any sort of emotional satisfaction from winning a competition or playing well at a concert. It's just something he has to do and the consequence is that others idolise him and isolate him from their normal day to day interactions.
Although this is something that was sort of pushed on him, he himself fuels this victim mindset of 'loneliness' as well. @morievna explains it so well in this post about Ugetsu being stuck in the Ni-Ti loop, I'll leave it here.
I find it absolutely brilliant where through watching Mafuyu perform, Ugetsu also identified him as a genius. He not only means that Mafuyu has talent, but music perhaps is a matter of survival for him as well. Mafuyu communicates better through music than any other medium. I think there is so much weight in this line because Ugetsu I think predicts that Mafuyu is dealing with some level of loneliness as well and therefore is able to give such an outstanding performance.
Ugetsu is honest when it comes to music
Ugetsu also is not only incredibly perceptive but incredibly blunt when it comes to music as well. We see that he doesn't hold back on harsh feedback when Mafuyu comes to visit and play for him. He tells it as it is because music is easy for him to understand. Music doesn't lie.
Ugetsu's Love Languages
Ugetsu does sort of follow a bit of the genius stereotype a bit in the sense that outside of his music, he acts like a bit like a foetus. Of course, post-breakup in his New York apartment, we definitely see an improvement on his independence (makes me very happy).
1. His top love language is acts of service. Multiple times throughout, we see Ugetsu asking Akihiko for coffee, to be fed breakfast or dinner as a means of getting attention, love and care. In Chapter 21.5, it is revealed that his father was a diplomat and grandfather a politician and he's kind of just thrown into this concrete basement as a young adult. I think he can't help but continuously return to the Tender-Loving-Care that Akihiko provides that he so desperately lacked as a child due to his absent parents.
2. Second love language would be physical touch. I think more so than sex, he just wants to be held sometimes. I literally don't think Ugetsu enjoys sex all that much but more so the feeling of being truly desired by someone. That's why I believe he always has such a hard time saying no to Akihiko's advances even after they broke up. Everytime Ugetsu sleeps with someone else, it's actually a very conscious attempt to break things off with Akihiko.
Quality time just doesn't seem possible with being a renowned violinist and honestly, as a musician, I really relate to that. Dating is hard for artists because schedules and performances are all over the place.
Words of affirmation I don't think is even a thing between Akihiko and Ugetsu. Ugetsu communicates through provoking Akihiko to try and get him to be more confident and serious in his music. But anything outside of music, Ugetsu cannot be honest. Akihiko just doesn't really communicate at all.
Least favourite love language is probably receiving gifts, as shown with Ugetsu slapping away the mug that Akihiko got for him. It seemed like an overly dramatic moment at the time when I first watched the Given Movie but I think in all honesty, I think it was a good representation to show how Ugetsu began to take Akihiko and his TLC for granted after a while and the moment the mug broke, it was a metaphor for him realising how much he was hurting Akihiko and taking advantage of the Akihiko's overwhelming love for him.
Ugetsu has Anxious Avoidant Attachment Style
According to psychologists Nicolas Favez and Herve Tissot, the researchers behind the 2019 study from Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, these are some of the traits of the Anxious Avoidant Partner:
Severe difficulty regulating their emotions in relationships - 100% he is always pivoting between hot and cold
Responding poorly or inappropriately to negative emotions - because Ugetsu is so sensitive, he actually internalises all of Akihiko's insecurity and pain while at the same time hurts Akihiko to break things off, which in turn hurts himself even more, it's a vicious cycle
Negative view of themselves - actually admits that he is the "lowest son of a bitch towards Akihiko"
Perceiving other people and their support negatively - doesn't trust Akihiko's sacrifice of wanting to be with him
Less commitment and satisfaction in romantic relationships - well, this point explains itself.
Higher likelihood of showing violence in their relationships - well, point explains itself.
Having a very high number of sexual partners - point explains itself
More sexual compliance (when asked for sex, you're likely to say yes) - everytime Akihiko makes any advances, Ugetsu accepts.
Elevated anxiety - everytime Akihiko leaves, Ugetsu is just emotionally completely going crazy hoping he would come back. The basement is completely in disarray.
Fear of intimacy or fear of relationships - He loves Akihiko to death. On one hand he's doing it for Aki's mental wellbeing. On another, he's self-sabotaging.
People like that often say:
I want to get emotionally close to my partner, but I worry about them hurting my feelings.
I want to feel close to my partner, but I also don’t trust them to want to be close to me.
I can’t live without my partner, even though being with them isn’t working.
I don't know about you but that sounds very much like Ugetsu. Ugetsu self-sabotages and it's because as a child he's been neglected for so long, he wants to be loved but he also craves to be alone. He is always so anxious whenever he pushes Akihiko away and hopes that he will come back.
So how can Ugetsu heal?
I think Ugetsu is well and truly on the path of healing. A period of independence will actually do him a lot of good in New York. Ugetsu needs to learn how to stand on his own two feet as an adult and practise proper hygiene and self-care without being completely reliant on music as a way of outlet and therapy.
Ugetsu if he is to find the right kind of partner, they need to have a secure attachment style and have lots of patience with him. Someone who initiates conversation and actually asks and says,
"Hey, what's wrong? Why are you doing this? What is the actual meaning behind your actions?"
Someone who holds him accountable whenever he tries to self-sabotage. Ugetsu needs to then step forward and start practising and noticing his new partner's love languages and meet in the middle, rather than have one person in the role of the caretaker and one in the role of the child.
He probably shouldn't date anyone in the music industry is my honest opinion, or date someone that's in a completely different field of music than he is.
HAHAHA the person that actually comes to mind is Iwaizumi from Haikyuu because I can't help but see some similarities between Oikawa and Ugetsu. Iwaizumi definitely seems like that type to be able to call people out on their bullshit while also being able to be a bit goofy and fun as well. Yeah I ship it.
Also, Ugetsu needs to spend more time working on building genuine, strong platonic friendships. I think he is actually doing well in that department, replying to Mafuyu's congratulatory message straight away. Ugetsu needs to take risks and put himself out there a bit more and become less codependent and enmeshed with other people's feelings. Harder done than said but I believe in him :)
Imagine actually taking notes like youre supposed to
Just a doodle dump lol sorry for being dead for so long
Heya, you know that rhythm game Friday Night Funkin?
I was lately thinking about, how cool it would be to sing against all of the sanses...
... yeah, I guess I have a new obsession...
(also lately got a little into drawing models for animation and the process of organized drawing is kind of satisfying)
Killer Sans by @rahafwabas
who of the Beatles are still alive? How many where there even? I bet i could fight them beatles are small
Another entry in Tumblr call-outs.
God I'm a sucker for characters who are so utterly loyal to someone that they're completely unhinged. Characters who have no moral compass except their overwhelming devotion to whoever they've chosen to listen to. That's the good shit
“Oh boys I can’t wait to post my art on tumblr so people can see it” I exclaims with joys
(I then reblogged 58 posts in an hour and drowned out my own art)
https://www.tumblr.com/aroace-get-out-of-my-face/779226406774341632/okay-okay-i-have-tried-somethingpls-pls-gravity
^
Animate you say….
^ the link to the post!! oho it is ON, THE RAP BATTLE'S FINALLY HAPPENING
I'll make these verse by verse then clean them up a bit and put them together when we have them all! (second verse!) (third verse here)
@aroace-get-out-of-my-face you started this!! Ford is getting destroyed by a puppet in front of a live audience and you're laughing!!
also Hm I don't think Dr. Pinius Pine is moving quite like puppet as I'd like him to be (maybe this is a sign I should finally go watch The Muppets 2011...) (for research purposes)
concerts arent really my thing, but its hard not to love moments like these<3
you can never predict the actions of a desperate man (wanted chocolate so bad i ate a 3 month old bounty)
bright colors and insane design choices be upon ye
a guy im probably gonna sell later, theyre based on totk stuff (i just completed all the shrines)
Let my taco bell get cold because I stopped to take pictures
Fucking Easter, my dudes
My dad hid some eggs with money in them along with a ton of empty ones.
Long story short: only 17 had money and I now have 11 dollars.
I had an asthma attack partway through searching, though.
Louis... mon cher... Je sais that la petite mademoiselle Claudia means a lot to you, je veux what's best for her too. Mais, pour être honnête, Je ne think pas she's as happy with us in our home as she would be otherwise. Fortunately, I have found a group of mentors seemingly adequate to her needs. These cinq garçons, musiciens majestueux, one has your namesake, Louis, offer une grand récompense monétaire pour l'adoption d'une fille, and ous can see her when they're on toure. Elles cinq sont called... Une Directioneaux???
Immediate yes!
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Worth It by Levi Robinheart (lyrics)
I’m up ‘cause you’re in my room I’ll keep-a myself from sleepin’ There’s nobody else in you Is it worth it to keep on dreamin’? Is it worth it to close my hair or brush my teeth in the mornin’? Is it worth it to go upstairs? I dunno, but I sure am thirsty
You woke me up inside your mind and said there’s nothin’ here to see I felt your ankles when they sprained but all I understood was grief I came to you in search of Hobbit holes, some earlobes, and a dream But all you said was “here’s a mess, go stuff it up and fix me!”
My sparrows told me there would come a day you’d paint yourself in blue Don’t disrespect the way you talk to me the way I talk to you I hear MacBeth within your eyes I read MacDuff around my feet I guess we all prefer our lies so I say damn the whole thing!
I don’t wanna sleep with you I’m not gonna take your reasons I wish I could keep my cool I guess we could call it even
[CHORUS:
I’m gonna be big someday I don’t know what’s so important I cry ‘cause I want my way I jump ‘cause I can’t ignore it I wanna be everything I’m not gonna live forever I can’t hope to live with me If I’m just gonna give you everything ]
I stopped sweating through my pores because the Sun just doesn’t give The man I use to start a war is not the man I use to live Twenty miles an hour and silent as the kingdoms in the Alps We’re just the corpses of the future kin we used to care about
The nights I stare myself to death The hours spent murdering my nose The mi’r exposes me yet it’s the mi’r of that I hate the most Oh, how we’re stranded in the Mississippi kickin’ at a can I may be toothless but I just don’t see the gun in your hand
I just came to walk away It don’t matter if you want me Go on then and stuff your face I’d rather be dry and starving
[CHORUS]
I want to tear my face apart I want to squeeze you into space I want to step on all the stars and make this medicine my grave I want to set this house on fire and swallow dollar bills and change But most of all I want to kill your thoughts and prove I’m not a waste
I want to sail across the sea and drown in paper cuts and lime I want to scrub out all my teeth and make ‘em sharper than the sky I want to knock out all my friends I want my friends to poison me But I’m still yellin’ in my room so I say fuck this whole thing
I’m gonna be big someday I don’t know what’s so important I cry ‘cause I want my way I jump ‘cause I can’t ignore it I wanna be everything I’m not gonna let me fear you I can’t hope to live with me Please repeat yourself, I can’t hear you!
[CHORUS]
[miscellaneous cheering and whooping]
Is it worth it to save a life? Is it worth it if it’s my own? Is it worth it to feel alright if it means I can find my home? I just wanna leave something and everything hurts like hell If nothing is anything then anything could be anything
confession time: I would sacrifice every movie harry was ever in if it meant he would keep his long hair
Screencap redraw from RudyTime's animatic 'Brainstorm's lament' which can be found here!
I didn’t get to grow up with my birth parents in my life, because of them I have lived through thirty one years of my life with abandonment issues. Searching for love and acceptance, settling for just anything that felt like love.. I look back on all of the relationships that I have been in and I feel so embarrassed to have allowed such toxicity in my life. I long for someone to come and save me, only to realize that I don’t need to be doing that anymore, I have myself to be proud of, I need to pour LOVE into this beautiful human being who is ENOUGH. I am WORTHY!!!!!!
Anyone who is struggling with the fact that you don’t feel important enough to be loved and appreciated, I’m here to tell you that you are!!!!!!
I love my friends. I love them all so much. They make me so happy, and they make life seem like a wonder. I spent time with them yesterday and it really made me feel so much better about myself, and we got to talk and laugh and hug. I just really love my friends. I never thought this would be possible. Five years ago I thought I would be dead before I ever got to college and yet here I am, living and loving. It’s all for them. It’s all because of them 💜
Got stuff!
ordered these from @orxinus 's preorders a bit ago! Quality is amazing, so glad I bought :))
Worth every cent
["guy who's building a machine made out of people & noticed you don't fit into their machine" voice] something's wrong with you
I would rather choose To love and lose - Than to never have loved you.
me
I wrote this a long time ago, but I went to see How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World today, and this suddenly seemed very appropriate.
Love - real love, the kind that lights your chest up and rushes in your throat and is selfless - is always worth it. We lose everything in the end. Some things we lose sooner than others, and some losses are more painful than others. But the choice to love is always worth it, even when it hurts.