Your Patrick Bateman Post Is So Real, You Have No Idea

Vox/Lucifer/Velvette/whoever you want loll in a “who hurt you?” Situation? 👀 OR reader trying to make them jealous? 😏

a/n — wait i actually don’t know what you fully been by the “who hurt you situation” but that makes me sad because it sounds like something i wanna write so please clarify.

Anyways here’s the reader making them jealous.

Lucifer, as much as he hates to admit it, gets insanely jealous. He doesn’t work hard to hide when he is feeling that way, but he will deny it for the longest time. We see in episode five that he deals with this by trying to upstage the said person, or show you how much better he is. This only works for a little bit before he crumbles. I feel like he would end up getting genuinely sad about it after his cockiness wears off. Like if you’re hoping for a smutty outcome with him, nope. He’s just kinda insecure and will need lots of reassurance.

Vox is kinda harder to place because yes, he gets insanely, maddening, concerningly jealous, but it’s how he shows this that’s complicated. If you’re in public, especially at the voxtech building, I doubt he would make a big display. After all, image is very big for him. But I do think he would be very petty towards you because, what the fuck? He would be furious at your selfish attempt to make him jealous, especially because it would work super fast. He would probably be very bratty about the whole situation, giving you the silent treatment, only replying with short hissy answers, etc. Probably also has trust issues because of valentino so lots of “Oh, now you’re talking to me? Don’t you have that whore to flirt with?” type answers.

Velvette would not hide her jealousy, in fact I think she would flaunt it. Openly insulting whoever the person is, and these cut deep too. She would be petty too, but not in a Vox way, in a ‘oh, im gonna make you even more jealous’ type of way. Like she goes ten times further too. If you were just gently touching someone’s arm, she’s halfway in their lap. Definitely playing with fire, looking over to see your reaction, smiling when she feels like it’s working. Her end goal here is absolutely to get railed by you, just being honest. Wasn’t even gonna be an nsfw post but she is absolutely pissing you off on purpose so you can take it out on her later.

Freaky ass scientist

Original:

I understand bill cipher bc if I fumbled Stanford pines I’d also start the apocalypse

okay so brett hand requests?? oh he’d be so subby in bed… probably would call you mommy… oh what a precious baby angel 🥹🥹

watched inside job, i want him SO BAD.

I Wanna Hold the Hand Inside You —

728 words,, Velvette x reader

a/n — I got this fic out wayyy later than I wanted because I got so side tracked with that OC shit.

summary — Velvette teaches the reader how to dance.

warnings — cursing(???), I guess??, really nothing, just fluff fluff fluff

“Velvette, oh my god. Stop laughing!” You hiss from across the room

Velvette did, in fact, not even stop to take a breath. She simply kept snorting and giggling at you relentlessly.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” she said through snickers, “It’s just that any old buffoon knows how to dance.”

“Well, I’m not any old buffoon,” you cross your arms and roll your eyes.

“Aw, come on!” Velvette teased, crossing towards you, “No need to pout, darling. It’s cute.”

She didn’t hesitate to take your hands in hers and place them on each side of her hips. 

“Here, let me show you,” She said, queuing up music on her phone, “You pick up a thing or two watching Valentino and Vox fuck around with this shit.”

“Velv, I don’t think you know the challenge you’re getting yourself into, right now,” You joke, but really you were completely serious.

“Bullshit,” she said, “I’ll be damned if I don’t turn you into a great dancer by the end of the night.”

You still look hesitant so she adds, “Don’t worry, i’ll tell you what to do.”

She places her hands on your shoulders and starts to move her hips slightly, leading your hands in the same direction. You take the hint and move your feet.

You’re awkward, though, clumsily swaying side to side with little to no rhythm. Your feet try to follow hers, but you end up stepping on her shoes.

She tries to hide her huff, those shoes took forever to finish and now they’re scuffed.

“No, sweetheart. Find the beat, “ She uses her hands on your chest to push you in the right direction. “Here, follow my feet. Right, then back, then left, then forward.”

“I’m no good at this, Velvette.”

“If you keep complaining, of course not,” she snips, glancing up at you with a quiet reassuring smile. 

She wasn’t good at quiet or comfort so it wasn’t entirely convincing, however you trust in her and followed her steps. 

Finally, Velvette sighed in relief. You were starting to get a hang of it. She reaches further up to comfortably rest her hands on your shoulders.

“Good, darling. Just like that,” she says. 

Your eyes are focused on your feet for one last moment, chanting her instructions under your breath.

At last, you look up at her, falling into a secure rhythmic peace. The room is silent for one moment and you just stare at her.

She looked beautiful, to say the least. And the funny thing is, in any other situation, you would have told her that directly. But it felt wrong to break the peace in that moment; soft music coming from Velvette phone speaker, her gazing up at you adoringly. 

She broke eye contact and moved closer, resting her head on your chest as you both danced. 

After a long moment, and an entire song, she pulls away from you and moves one of her hands off your shoulders, taking yours. 

She lifts it up above her, “Look, now you spin me,” she says, doing the motion.

She spins away from you and looks at you expectantly, “Now, pull me closer and i’ll spin back into you, and then you can—“

Her sentence is cut off with a small yelp as you yank her towards you, making her twirl back into your arms, and dipping her.

“Something like that?” You ask with a proud smile,  gazing down at her.

For a moment, she still looks surprised by your quick motion, but then the smile returns, “Yes, yes, you flirt. Exactly like that.” 

She leans up to kiss you, arms wrapping around your neck. You still clutch onto her waist, grinning into the kiss.

“Okay, okay, get off of me, you big idiot,” she says through a smile, “See? I told you I was right.”

“Yeah, yeah. I guess i’m pretty good at dancing now, right?” you lean away from her and laugh.

“Well, don’t get ahead of yourself. You’re no ballerina, that’s for damn sure,” She takes your hand and leads you away, “Alright, dance lesson over. Let’s watch a movie.”

“Whatever you say, teacher,” and you let her lead you to the couch.

She cozies up and rests her head on your chest as you sling an arm around her, pulling her closer. With that, you finally settle down for the night.

a/n — this fic was inspired by fade into you by mazzy star if it wasn’t incredibly obvious BTW!!

My dear!

While yes, deleting your blog was sudden, but what you felt was completely valid! I'm just so honestly glad and relieved that you're okay! And I get it too, it's stressful, there's eyes on you, and it can be pressuring. Plus, having to do content that you're not into anymore? Yeah, I get it.

I'm sorry that you're going through a rough patch at the moment, but know that I'm sending good vibes your way and genuinely hoping that things start to look up.

- 🍆 anon

(and just letting you know, I did start my own blog now! I'm trying to expand on my previous asks + new ideas.)

oh my god, my old friend penis anon 😖🙏 Stop you all have been so nice about this, it’s so sweet.

I’m feeling slightly better lately, and i’m really glad you understand! Also whatttt, new blog? Drop the @ babes 💕

i was born in the right century i love looking at boys kissing on my phone

Lets say for the sake of argument that Bill could get massages. Would he like them? I think we've agreed that he is super touch starved, plus if you've gone long enough without a massage the process of kneading out the knots and kinks can be painful at first, which might be something he'd enjoy, on top of the whole Having Someone Service Him Like That. But on the other hand, getting a massage puts you in an inherently vulnerable position, so would he want to do that?

˖⋆࿐໋

Ooooh, this is an interesting idea. Because like, Bill would love the idea of someone serving him like that, as long as that’s what it is. He would enjoy this if he’s under the impression he still had the power, which unless your a like an intergalactic god, he would. And especially if he’s experimenting with a human body, he’d think the sensations were really funny and even enjoyable. Yes, I think he’d be into it!

rereading american pyscho, oh how i would love to dom patrick bateman.

Imagine getting ma//ting pressed by canon human bill cipher so you’re forced to look at him which he finds absolutely hilarious.

there are lots of other blogs that write for dom male characters, sorry.