Wait My Headcanon Is Actually C A N O N

stanford pines' love language is quality time.

he feels like he lost so much time, so many years stuck in the nightmare realm that he relishes any moment that he gets to spend time with you.

the most monotonous tasks like brushing his teeth or folding laundry feel so much more enthralling with you there.

wanting you to tag along on his anomaly hunting, eager to see the excitement and awe in your eyes with every new anomaly you encounter.

sitting underneath an impressive oak tree, your head resting on ford's lap as he reads or is writing in his journal.

no words need to be spoken, just the two of you relishing in each other's presence.

"say ford, do you ever get tired of our routine?"

"no, not particularly. what makes you ask?" he hums, glancing down at you with a raised brow.

"just curious, you've just had such exciting adventures in the past. i know you were literally stuck in another realm, but i sometimes wonder if this gets boring." you admit, fiddling with the leaf that had fallen from the tree, the colors transforming with the changing of the seasons.

ford closes his book, leaning forward and pressing a kiss on your forehead suddenly.

"my dear, i could never be bored in your company. any thing i get to do with you is truly an adventure of its own."

Ok so you know the karaoke page? While I know everyone interprets it as they made out or whatever, but here's what I think ACTUALLY happened, I think bill got so drunk that he told his plans for what he was actually gonna do with the portal and how he was gonna rule the earth with ford because bills a fucking idiot who get emotional after a couple of drinks, and drunk ford understood Half of what bill said cause he's plastered as hell too (bills fault) and was like "oh em gee tis guys he's got it all figured it out, he knows exactly what's hes gonna do!" so the part where ford write "I'm  gonna, were gonna" is referring how their gonna take over the world together, because its something their GOING to do, not something that they've ALREADY done

Stanley knows his brother more then even himself.

mindscape talks

“denied the catharsis of punishment” is an underappreciated but hugely effective narrative consequence imo 

Can confirm, this fic has heart because it's stolen mine, propped it up on a nicely decorated, ornate mantle for all to see and be horrified at! I ate all the yogurt though.

AND BILL'S IN IT!

TILL WEIRDMAGEDDON DO US PART (This is not a drill. This is a triangle yelling at you through your brain-meats.)

HEY YOU! YES YOU! Do you crave romance that tastes like someone dropped a Nicholas Sparks novel in a vat of radioactive glitter?! Do you like love stories with emotional trauma, eldritch tax evasion, grocery store explosions, and one sentient triangle who once tried to become God but now has to do laundry?!?

THEN CONGRATULATIONS, FLESHSACK! You’ve just stumbled into the most cursed rom-com that legally counts as marriage counseling in twelve dimensions. Welcome to:

“TILL WEIRDMAGEDDON DO US PART” A fanfic where I, Bill Cipher—chaos deity, triangle fashion icon, nightmare-made-sarcasm—am FORCED into a marriage trial with YOU, some dangerously unbothered human with a sarcasm stat higher than my ego.

WHY READ THIS FANFIC? ✔️ It’s got heart! ✔️ It’s got horror! ✔️ It’s got a sentient yogurt aisle that may or may not be bleeding! ✔️ And did I mention? I’m in it.

We’re talking existential flirting, legally sanctioned domestic terrorism, bathwater that might be sentient, and one woman who said “yeah sure, I’ll marry the triangle, what’s the worst that could happen?”

THIS IS NOT A “I CAN FIX HIM” FIC. WE'RE BOTH BROKEN. WE JUST MADE IT WEIRD TOGETHER.🔥

So grab your glitter-sigil pajamas, sacrifice a toaster, and dive into the cosmic nightmare-romcom you didn’t know you needed. Side effects may include:

Third-degree sarcasm

Unholy shipping

Ford Pines having a midlife crisis in aisle 7

Weekly acts of violence (sanctioned by the Axolotl™)

Me, cackling in eldritch stereo

"It’s not a love story. It’s horror disguised as comedy." ✨Read now… or I’ll mail you cursed wedding invitations that scream when opened.✨

[AO3 LINK HERE]

more of the sillies :D

click for better quality

Me trying to explain my newest hyperfixation to my normal, neurotypical friends

Talking about a single bill book page under here

The thing about this page is, for something that was supposedly ripped out, it doesn't really contain anything that strikes me as needing.... to have been... ripped out.

Sure, he talks about being lonely here and maybe that could be embarrassing to him, but it's not like he hasn't talked about being an outcast before, his entire about page has a section dedicated to his trials and tribulations with his peers when he was younger.

Additionally, there's many times in the journal where he seems to have written something he feels he shouldn't have. Though ripping that thing out isnt usually his method of choice. He much prefers to scratch things out.

Why couldn't the page have existed like this? Or even, if the entire thing truly is too embarrassing to have in your journal, why did you write it there in the first place?

It seems to me that the only reason this page was included with the other Bill pages was to set up the narrative of Ford's loneliness. (That within Journal 3 proper isn't really needed, because one can already ascertain that...). Doyalist reason? Sure, Alex is trying to set up his story. Watsonian reason? Naturally you turn it around and see it as Bill trying to set up his own story.

This page's existence in general isn't the only beef I have with it though. While we're meant to accept it on the basis that he ripped this out, Ford engaging with personal feelings, especially negative ones like this in such a blatant way is... unusual. I'd say he's much more prone to distracting himself away from that sort of thing with his work.

For the journal especially, this page would have to take place pretty early, as it's supposed to be pre-Bill. Which is weird, considering a later page in the original J3...

Of course, like I said, we the audience can understand Ford is lonely. And I'm not trying to say he doesn't know it himself, but he does not engage with it.

The thing about this page though, is that it's much more than just a single spot where Ford's own loneliness is mentioned. It's a turning point for the way Ford writes. Prior to Fiddlefords arrival, Stanford takes a few pages to introduce himself, then everything following is either an anomaly page or the occasional muse page. Like I said before, it's all very work-focused.

After Fiddleford comes to town, Ford is forced to feel the full extent how lonely he's truly been, and he starts to write a lot of pages of his and Fiddleford's adventures together, including his feelings during. (insert everyones favorite lines here:)

But he also starts to write about something else...

Over

and over

and over

again...

Fiddleford's renewed presence in his life really opened some mental-block floodgates in Ford's mind. From experience, sometimes you really aren't faced with how truly lonely you are until you are provided with some respite from it.

Again, I would like to say, it's not that I think he wasn't lonely before. He definitely was, and it's certainly part of why Bill was able to target him. But would he have written it out like that at that point in time? In the journal no less?

I dont really think so. I think he was doing everything in his power not to think or feel it.

And writing it down isn't really what I'd call conducive to that.

if there isn’t any new bill cipher x reader content soon i think i will blow up into a a million tiny little pieces