I have no clue what I'm doing | 20
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Latest Posts by delighfullyamess - Page 9
I want to hate how hard I laughed at this
The Untamed (2019)
Nie Huaisang: I don’t see why it’s so hard to understand, DaGe.
Nie Mingjue: I just don’t see why he would give up his freedom, possibly his LIFE just to protect those Wen-dogs-
Nie Huaisang: DaGe shut up, they’re coming down from the mountain.
Wei Wuxian: *holding little baby A-Yuan, giving him kisses and pretending to eat his little hands*
A-Yuan: *baby squeal* A-Die! No eating, no no!
Wei Wuxian: I think this tiny one will taste especially good! *pretends to eat his pinky*
Nie Huaisang: *looks at NMJ*
Nie Mingjue: *tearing up* Okay I get it.
Nie Huaisang: *big sigh* You aren’t gonna start talking about when I was that small, right-
Nie Mingjue: You were SO tiny, though! Father said you were born early, you nearly fit in my hand! *emotional dumb bitch noises*
“I hadn’t realized I was a villain in your narrative.”
↪ ‘A Court of Wings and Ruin’ by Sarah J Maas
While I love how this fandom has accepted the fact mingjue is a mountain of muscle with big tiddies I feel like in every incarnation au with mingjue he should just become taller he may have been 6'3 when he died but not anymore honey now he's like 6'5 like everything just stays the same expect mingjue is just taller
these and more can be found at the Instagram account teabag.cartoon
There will never be a time where this post is not funny
100.) Happy 100th post, everybody!
Nie Huaisang: Wei Wuxian was the only motherfucker in the whole cultivation world who could Handle me and he's fucking dead
Mo Xuanyu: I wish I were dead
Nie Huaisang: ......maybe I can solve both our problems
things that made me stop wanting to die that require no effort whatsoever
change the color used to highlight text on your laptop
move the pictures on your wall
stack whatever clutter is in your room into piles even if you don’t have time to clean it all
slightly vary your commute, even just by one street
change where you sit and scroll aimlessly on your phone even if it’s only to the chair in your room instead of your bed
drink water or juice out of a wine glass in the morning because nothing is real
shower with the lights off, without music
buy $3 flowers at trader joe’s—they look bad next to the more expensive ones but they look so good in your room
start typing things you don’t post into your notes. your thoughts can be worth documenting even if you don’t deem them worth sharing
wake up super early just once. you don’t have to make it a habit it’s just extra satisfying to go to bed that night
listen to the entirety of your favorite album from 2015
i'm losing my shit at this the delivery is absolutely flawless
so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god
I know we’re all strapped for cash and and there’s a lot of need right now, but maybe y'all can match me here.
I just donated $25 dollars to Brave Space Alliance- a Black and trans led LGBTQ center that supports the community on the South and West Sides. I donate in honor of Tony McDade- a Black transman murdered by the police last week in Florida.
Fellow white LGBTQs, don’t forget that Pride means all of us. Protect and support Black people in our community!
If you can’t donate, please spread!
Yo I think a about this post a lot
One of my favourite Untamed moments of NHS so far is the soft smile of "ah, home sweet home" while everybody else are clearly "is the Unclean Realm a supervillain lair?" So, a prompt: 5 times the Nie sect's perfectly ordinary sect things got everybody else freaked out, much to NHS' puzzlement.
1
Even Nie Huaisang would agree with the general consensus that he’s a useless good-for-nothing, which is why he doesn’t understand everyone’s expressions when he helped out in making dinner when they’re all night-hunting. Scorn he’d be used to, but everyone is just goggling as if he’d suddenly summoned lightning.
“Were you not planning on eating the boar or something?” he asked, looking around in confusion.
“You broke down the entire carcass into edible pieces in less than an incense stick’s worth of time,” Jiang Cheng said, voice a bit strangled. “Not just the meat pieces, but the offal, too.”
Nie Huaisang shrugged. “My clan were originally butchers. It’d be weirder if I didn’t know how to do that.”
“Could you do it to a person?” Wei Wuxian asked, eyes alight with mischief.
Jiang Cheng smacked him.
2
During the preparations for the Phoenix Mountain hunt, Wei Wuxian gets a brilliant idea and starts writing furiously on pieces of paper in one of the Jin sect’s sitting room.
“Can someone get me some blood? Human, ideally, but pig will do,” he asked at one point, having already scabbed up all his fingers in making draft talismans, and when a bowl was put next to him, he doesn’t think too much about it, only happy that it didn’t seem to ever empty.
After a while, he looked up and noticed that Baxia was propped up on the table next to him, dripping blood into his bowl. Definitely human, too. There was no apparent source for it.
He stared for a while, then went to find Nie Mingjue.
“Did you just stab someone?” he demanded, and Nie Mingjue shook his head. “Then does your sword just regularly drip blood?”
Nie Mingjue shrugged. “I’ve stabbed a lot of people. Why wouldn’t it?”
3
“I don’t know what the problem is,” Nie Huaisang protested. “You wanted me to watch him, he was tired, he asked for a bedtime story!”
“You told him the story about people getting made into meat pies!” Jiang Cheng hollered, holding a wailing Jin Ling in his arms. “Right after he’d had meat pies at dinner!”
“It’s tradition to tell that story over meat pies. Don’t you remember the first time I told you that story? You and Wei Wuxian both turned green.”
Jiang Cheng glared at him and comforted Jin Ling to no avail.
Nie Huaisang tapped the child’s shoulder with his fan. “Stop crying. You know what happens to little boys that lose their temper.”
Jin Ling stopped crying at once, his face pale.
Jiang Cheng looked at him, then back at a smiling Nie Huaisang, then back again. “What did you tell him now?!”
4
“Today’s not a good day for a visit,” Nie Huaisang said apologetically. “We get ghosts today.”
“You’re a cultivation clan and you allow ghosts?” Jiang Cheng scoffed.
“They come here to be purified. Anyway, they’re really cute ghosts.”
“…what?”
“Mostly animals,” Nie Huaisang said. “Side effect of cultivation by butchering – at first it was mostly livestock, but after a while we started getting all sorts. Drowned kittens, run over puppies, that sort of thing.”
“…there are puppies?” Jiang Cheng said blankly. “Ghost puppies?”
“Mm, yes. Do you want to pet some of them before they go? They’re usually not powerful enough to take more than a very small amount of yang energy, and petting them makes the purification process easier.”
“Right. Show me the way.”
5
Nie Mingjue was unconscious, having put himself between his sworn brothers and their enemies as they tried desperately to escape the trap they’d been lured into; he’d been stabbed, cut or whipped a number of times before they finally managed to break their way into the cave and escape. Lan Xichen had put him on his back, while Jin Guangyao carried Baxia, his fingers dipping down to caress the blade every few minutes.
“As much as I appreciate dage’s sacrifice, he’s probably the only one who knows his way around this maze,” Jin Guangyao said after they’d been wandering for nearly a shichen without finding anything but more cave, but he settles down a bit after Lan Xichen gives him a look. “I didn’t mean anything by it, erge, you know that. I just meant that it would be nice if we had a guide – ah!”
“What happened?”
“Dage’s saber – it bit me!”
Lan Xichen blinked. “…I’m sorry?”
“The beast head on the hilt! It bit me!” Jin Guangyao took another step, yelped again, and retreated.
Lan Xichen frowned thoughtfully and looked ahead, then turned to go down another fork. “Anything now?”
“No, it’s quiet. Why do you – no. Erge. We’re not following the directions given by a saber! Who would do that?”
“It’s not a saber, it’s Baxia,” Lan Xichen said calmly. “It’s fine. Nie Mingjue always did say Baxia had a better sense of direction than he did.”
“I thought he just meant that he didn’t have any,” Jin Guangyao said. “I didn’t think he meant…”
He trailed off, a strange look coming into his eyes.
“Do you think Baxia took it personally, back in the Sun Scorching Palace, when I said – ow!”
“Maybe you should consider apologizing,” Lan Xichen suggested, doing his best to hide a smile.
..... You know what your right
Lan Ghost #1: I knnnew it. I KNEW it. That Lan Wangji was a trouble maker from the start!
Madam Lan: Don’t look at me! He gets it from YOUR side of the family!
Lan Ghost #2: He’s just trying to help his friend!
Lan Ghost #1: Pffff “friend”.
Lan Ghost #3: If he tries to protect Wei Wuxian, Gusu Lan will be implicated, dishonour will befall the family, traditional values will disintegrate -
Lan Ghost #4: Not to mention Wei Wuxian apparently already HAS a child.
Lan Ghost #3: My disciples never got into such trouble, they all became wandering healers.
Qingheng-jun: Well, we can’t ALL be wandering healers.
Lan Ghost #1: No, your son just has to fall in love with a NECROMANCER!
Y'all i'm crying I finally read enough porn to run into "their tongues battle for dominance"
Thanks delete this
I. Just realized
Liu Haikuan (Lan Xichens actor) looks like handsome squidward
Riusuke Fukahori creates incredible depth in his artworks by painting a layer at a time onto acrylic resin, until a 3-dimensional image is formed, sort of like how 3D printers work. via awesomer
Click for more photos!
The best post I've seen
I finally watched Fatal Journey and I made a bunch of funny screenshots so enjoy [part 1]
Keep reading
T h i s
advocate for short lwj rights
I didn't ask for pain
WangXian Animal Crossing AU. Wei Ying moved out.
there’s a large grey area between “this creator is a misogynist/homophobe/racist” and “this creator did not fully think through the implications of some of their writing choices” and it would be nice if people would stop to assess where in the scale between those two cases their criticism applies, instead of going for a hard zero on the first option all the time
Awww 🥰 😭😭
F A C T S
After watching Fatal Journey and having Nie brothers feels, I am CONVINCED that the Qinghe Nie Sect disciples absolutely knew that Nie Huaisang was not a good-for-nothing idiot.
He spent…what? 10+ years as sect leader? And he still had disciples following him to Jinlintai and the Burial Mounds. He still had disciples defending him despite his reputation as a poor swordsman.
No, they knew. Those disciples knew their sect leader was not the dumb moron he let everyone believe. They didn’t follow him because he was physically strong and a beast on the battlefield like his brother. They sure as hell didn’t stay out of sheer loyalty to his brother while watching the other sects get stronger and wealthier. They knew Huaisang was just and fair and caring like Nie Mingjue was even if he lacked the physical strength and cultivation power. Huaisang cared about his people, which is very evident when he - in the middle of trying to find a sword spirit bent on killing them - argues with Mingjue about leading disciples into danger like sacrificial lambs. He cares for his disciple brothers and sisters, and they know it.
Oh sure, they didn’t have a clue about his revenge plot because I’m pretty sure Huaisang kept that close to the vest so not a single whisper would leak out to Jin Guangyao. But they sure as hell knew their sect leader was more than competent. They played along and pretended he was weak and a pushover even if they didn’t really know why he wanted to project that image. They knew and they stayed and fought by his side.
And that, dear friends, is why Nie Huaisang is a badass.
