This Is Some Bullshit

yet more amazing work from the woke mob

the woke mob has turned santa clause TRANSGENDER and now he fills your stocking with ARTISANAL PICKLES and CHEESES instead of TOYS. Parents across the GLOBE are actually REALLY STOKED about charcuterie stockings, as the prices of FINE CHEESES and whatnot have SKYROCKETED.

her voice was as silky as silken tofu. but her words were as firm as extra firm tofu

my wife tried to do the thing where you pull a tablecloth really fast and the dishes stay in place but instead of a tablecloth it was a towel and instead of dishes it was our poor long suffering cat that was just trying to sleep on said towel. poor baby got whipped across the room fast enough that its meow got dopplered into meeeeeeOOOWWwwwwww

Yo, correct me if I am wrong please, but didn't Hitler rise to power because he promised to fix the German economy and people really liked that so they looked past everything else he was doing??? Like exactly what's happening in America right now???

So many people said they voted for Trump, put a truly evil person in power, because he said he'd fix the economy, and a little voice in my head is going, "Isn't that what happened with fucking Hitler??"

But I've seen no one point that out so maybe I'm miss remembering???????

people will say "why cant the eldritch gods just be nice to humans :((" and then kill a bug for existing near them