....You Know On One Hand I Didn't Mean To Imply That 'that' Was What Happened But At The Same Time That

I physically need Jason Todd to have several popular accounts as a reviewer of, honestly, anything.

New article in Gotham Gazette? A famous five-star reviewer already wrote a comment on what unethical methods the writer had used, along with debunking the rest of the article. And guess what? It has more likes than the original post.

New restaurant opened? Another famous critique just finished polishing a very detailed post regarding everything inside it — the decor, the cooking techniques, the service (he almost never picks up on waiters, though). It is so on the spot that, honestly, the owners can't even argue with the review.

New movie? Uh-uh, be sure you write your characters properly. New vigilante? Get detailed information on your methods of work and fighting style — and, hey, it might be even useful. New book? Be careful, someone is about to kick your ass on the Internet, unless written worthy.

The funniest part? No one assumes that it is the same person.

And the batfamily? Well, they have no time for this. Expect for... Tim.

Tim, sending a link to Vale's article: Hood. Drag her ass.

Jason: lol

Jason: give me, like, an hour–

Tim: Had I told you you are my favourite?

Jason: i might have an idea, yeah

Tim: Hood. The new restaurant is so ass. They are also homophobic and stared at me and Kon the whole evening like we killed someone. Do something.

Jason: sec

(The restaurant gets closed in, like, two days after that)

Tim: Jason. Bruce pisses me off this week.

Jason: LOL

Jason: wake up, birdie, the new article shitting on Batman's technics just dropped

Tim: YAY

I had an idea the other day of Nightwing and Redhood getting de-aged to their Robin ages (so both robin)& Bruce taking them to the watchtower because he can't leave them at home lmao- not sure what you'd do with that idea but tis simply something I thought about

okay so because I absolutely adore this but also have someplace to be rn, its gonna be a timed write(ugh back to my english class days) and imma write this is eight minutes so no promises actually this might be really bad but here we go

Bruce didn't know exactly how it had happened. He had just... woken up. And boom there were two small, tiny little robins in his bed, curled against his side like back when they were younger. Dick's hair was silky soft as he ran his hand through it, and Jason was so small, his little head pressed against Bruce's chest. Then they woke up.

"Who is that." Dick's voice was flat. Hard. Bruce bit back a sigh. "Dickie, this is Jason. Your brother." "No he's not." Dick wasn't budging. Bruce fought his huff of annoyance. "Chum, you have to accept that he is your brother. I've already explained it to you. Try to be nice. Please?" Dick glowered at Jason, the other boy unaware as he munched his cereal on Bruce's other side, a book in his other hand.

Bruce smiled fondly and ran a hand through Jason's hair, pressing a kiss to his head. Jason smiled automatically at the gesture, though his eyes didn't leave the page. Bruce realized his mistake a second too late and quickly nudged the kitchen knives away before Dick could reach for them. He tugged his oldest son into his lap instead, despite the boys protests, and rained kisses onto him as an apology.

Dick was laughing by the time he finished, and even ate his breakfast quietly, sitting right next to Jason, and didn't try any physical violence. Bruce wasn't close to enough to hear if any emotional violence had been implemented though, having stood to clean the dishes. His phone vibrated, and he sighed as he spotted the call from Hal. League meeting. Right.

Bruce glanced at the two boys sitting at the table. Dick had stolen Jason's book and was in the process of pretending to pour orange juice over it, while Jason screamed, a butter knife in one hand. Yeah... he could not leave them home alone.

"Is that-?" "are those-?" The whispers started the second he breached the Watchtower, and the way they quickly silenced revealed that they had been happening the whole ride up the elevator. "Stay close to me boys." he murmured. Jason immediately latched to his leg, eyeing the heroes they passed warily. Dick, on the other hand, skipped ahead, until he realized that put him at a greater distance away from his dad than the "replacement" as he had called Jason. Then he did two flips and jumped onto Bruce's shoulders.

Bruce sighed. "Chum, play nice." Dick stuck his tongue out as Bruce settled into his chair, pulling Jason up to sit on his lap as Dick remained on his shoulders. The League blinked at him owlishly. Dick hissed. Jason smiled shyly. "They were hit with a de-aging spell." Bruce answered apologetically with a wince. "Sorry, I can't leave them home alone or one of them will kill the other."

Barry chuckled. "Yeah. Don't worry B, we get it. Red Hood is damn scary." "Poor Nightwing." Dinah murmured. Bruce snorted. "Oh, no no no. Night would be the one doing the murdering." He chuckled, pointing to the child sitting on his head. "Its little Hood I'm worried for."

i'm so deep into the brainrot so are they

This is how this would happen, Jason especially

Tim accidently referring to the Joker as Dad but those who know about Joker Jr aren’t present and so everyone is left with the ‘realisation’ that Tim is the son of the biggest nightmare to their family.

It’s probably Jason and Steph, her there to bother Tim but Jason went to the manor for food and the two naturally started arguing. Maybe Jason tells Tim to stop costing on his case and prove a point be made against blonde, but Tim just offhandedly goes, “Later, I think my dad broke out of Arkham again but the guards aren’t doing anything. Maybe they’re in on it…”

The two present naturally look at each other with confusion and for the first time stop bickering to peak over his shoulder and see what his case is because, holy shit Tim had a villain for a dad and didn’t tell us? Only to see numerous photos of the Joker in his cell and many reports over the last week of how he’s been behaving and Jason…

Steph pushes the man out of the room when she sees his face go from frozen fear to anger, thinking it’s towards Tim and his secrecy and, while she totally gets that, now isn’t the time.

Though when they get into the Jason starts a rant about how Bruce and Dick should have told him that the monster had a child, even if that child wasn’t Tim! Jason protects kids! Did they think he’d hurt him just because of who his father is?

No!

If anything, he’d become the kids full time body guard to stop that mad man from making Tim into another version of himself!

The two naturally go to tell the others, pulling Damian, Cass and Duke into a mostly unused room and telling them what they discovered, all while Tim stays in the library working on his case.

Cass is beyond worried but also confused because he doesn’t seem to have any physical characteristics of the Joker or Harley, but maybe the mother is different? Perhaps it’s still Janet and either she had a fling with the Joker or something far worse, which makes the young girl enraged on the woman’s behalf.

Damian makes a comment about him killing Tim, not in a serious manner but more as an option, but Duke shuts it down, saying that having a villain for a parent doesn’t mean anything about who you will be. He points out those in the family of that nature and other heroes like Superboy.

When asked why they didn’t get Dick or Babs involved, Jason says they defiantly know and lied about it.

It’s only after another three hours of working that Tim catches himself referring to the Joker as dad and shuts his laptop, making his way to Bruce’s room to hide under the older man’s bed like he usually does when that happens, only to overhear what his siblings are saying.

Tim presses his ear against the door to hear better.

“If that maniac had a kid, surely he’d have told everyone he had an heir or something.” That’s Steph’s voice, filled with worry that only he and Cass could detect as she hides it under a whiney tone.

Jason is next to respond, “maybe he doesn’t know? I mean, did Tim ever even interacted with him before he became Robin?”

It doesn’t take much more than that for Tim to realise that he must have been talking aloud again or absently answered someone earlier and misspoke in front of them.

Panic fills him as he avoids telling Bruce when he gets bad, even if it’s just a small thing, because the older man will start of being a concerned parent then go into Batman mode and only just stop himself from putting Tim in the confinement cell. Sure Tim came up with the idea of the cell so he wouldn’t hurt anyone if his conditioning got too bad, but he’s learnt the signs. He’s not a mindless drone, he still knows who he is and doesn’t hear someone talking to him or anything like that.

He just… sometimes forgets the Joker hurt him.

It’s not Tim’s fault that memories of watching TV with him and Harley, tucked between them with a big bowl of ice cream felt better than most memories of his real parents.

But he knows it’s wrong, always comes back to calling the Joker his enemy.

Bruce just doesn’t get that.

Tim hears them talk a bit more, theories about who his mother might be, if Tim is safe at the manor, if Joker knows he has a son…

Opening the door, Tim stands there and stares at them as all eyes snap to him in alarm.

He doesn’t let anybody speak, cutting them all off quickly, “He’s not my dad. Go the cave and search for file number 26557933301-JJ and put in the code AGELAST, all caps.”

With that he turns and leaves, walking at first before running to Bruce’s room to hide.

He goes to family dinner and pretends not to notice the quietness or how Jason is still there, eating his food quietly and waiting for the ball to drop.

Naturally, Damian is the one to say what he wants first, “So why is okay that Tim shot the joker but I got in trouble for stabbing Bane?”

Everyone groans.

Canon. Change my mind

Robin era Jason, who's going after the Riddler with Batman, and one of the Riddles is some kind of literary reference, so Jason solves it easily but when he gets to the location the riddle hinted at, it's wrong????

And it haunts him the whole time until they finally catch the Riddler and Jason gets to ask him about it before he gets locked up again, and turns out the Riddler just confused two diffrent barely similar quotes or something.

And Jason LOSES HIS MIND.

HE LOST SLEEP OVER THIS??! THIS?!?! HE THOUGHT HIS KNOWLEDGE WAS WRONG HE HAD TO REOPEN THE ORIGINAL NOVEL, HE'S BEEN CARRYING ON HIM FOR THE REST OF THE INVESTIGATION JUST IN CASE-

Anyways Batman barely manages to save the Riddler from getting a papercover volume shoved down his throat.

mic check one two one two

my duolingo streak is almost to 365 days who cheered

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Monster High: Phantom Year

Danny Phantom x Monster High

Old wip idea.

The ghost world had been awfully quiet as mysteriously tremors rumbled throughout the monster and normi worlds, all for a week straight. Everyone in Monster High was stressed, especially the ghostly students, as their mysterious new king had gone missing. However, there wasn’t much any of the students could do… Until one night, while having a creepover to calm some nerves Frankie, Clawdeen, Draculaura, Cleo, Ghoulia, and Spectra get a surprise visit from Operetta. Asking them to come to the Catacombs immediately.

While in the Catacombs, the ghouls find an injured normi boy.

While on the way to a diplomatic meeting to meet with other monster leaders, Danny got ambushed and gravely injured. He flew into a random portal and landed in a strange, dark, damp, and musty place. Being too weak to move any further he passed out, excepting his fate; only to wake up in some sort of creepy nurses office. He didn’t know what to expect, but finding a monster high school and being asked to attend said school wasn’t it.

With the promise of protection by the school and to help him in his kingly and high school studies, Danny accepts. With only a small handful of monsters who knew of his kingly and hero identities, and location, he must navigate this strange knew environment without revealing who he is for his protection as villains search for him.

Friendships will be made, mysteries will be uncovered, old enemies will resurface, grades will go up, and dreams will be reclaimed.

All that and more in a single Phantom Year.

.

.

.

Dick, to the Titans: OK this is my little brother, everyone has to be so nice to him!

Jason, 6'4, built like a double fridge and holding a gun: Hey.

The Titans:

Years later.

Dick, to the Titans again: OK this is my even littler brother, everyone be super super nice to him!

Duke, 6'2, built like a linebacker and lit up like a glo stick: Yo.

The Titans:

Years after that.

Dick, again, to the Titans: OK this is my littlest baby brother, everyone has to be so sweet to him! He's a baby!

Damian, 18 and 6'0, made of pure muscle and holding a sword: Greetings.

The Titans: ...where are you finding these brothers.

“Daddy, up!”

Clark doesn’t miss a beat. He continues telling Bruce about his investigation into chemical waste shipments out of Metropolis Harbor and a possible connection to LexCorp as he bends down to pick up his toddler.

Bruce smiles as the sixteen-month-old boy waves at him. He waves back and silently wishes he’d seen at least one of his boys this small. This is criminally adorable.

“Daddy,” Jon interrupts again. He pats Clark’s cheek with a tiny hand, trying to get his father to stop talking and look at him. “Daddy, ‘nack?”

Again, Clark doesn’t even pause his story. He reaches into one of the pockets of his jeans and pulls out a pack of animal crackers, then opens it and hands his son a bear-shaped cracker. He hasn’t even broken eye contact with Bruce, who figures out very quickly what “nack” means.

“Da-kit?” Jon’s gnawing on the animal crackers half-heartedly. Bruce guesses that he’s pleased with it, but would prefer something else.

This gets Clark to pause his story. “No, my love, no chocolate crackers today.” Ah, okay—“da-kit.” That’s cute. “We have to get more at the store later. Can you be patient?”

Bruce fully expects the baby to throw a tantrum. He has no firsthand experience with toddlers, but general knowledge of children tells him that “no” isn’t a word they like to hear.

To his amazement, Jon smiles sweetly. “Pay-tay,” he says quietly, still chewing on his cracker. “Tow.”

Clark smiles and pokes Jon’s nose, earning him a little giggle. “That’s right, baby boy. Patient, then we go to the store.”

“You know,” Bruce interjects, “I keep some chocolate in my utility belt. Just in case one of the boys wants a snack.”

Jon wastes no time reaching his chubby arms toward Bruce at the word “chocolate.”

“I could watch him for a bit,” Bruce continues, accepting the baby happily when Clark relinquishes his hold on the squirming boy. “I’m sure grocery shopping is quicker without a baby, right?”

Clark levels a flat, yet amused look at his friend. “Groceries. Right. Totally not your baby fever acting up.”

Jon’s happy as can be in Bruce’s arms. He’s got a snack, the promise of chocolatey snacks, and he’s being held. What more could a baby want?

“Bye bye, Daddy!”

Bruce barely suppresses a grin. “You heard him, Clark. You’re dismissed.”

The batkids do not have a mother to find items for them that they themselves cannot find, so they find the closest replacement at the moment

Bruce:… Tim why is Harley Quinn eating cinnamon rolls in our kitchen Tim: *typing on his phone* oh I couldn’t find my headphones Bruce:… what does that even mean ~ Bruce: *walks into living room*… hello Selina Selina: *watching cartoons with Jason’s head in her lap* oh hey baby! Bruce: w- why are you- not that I’m not happy to see you but why are you here? Selina: kitten needed help finding his helmet.  Jason: *lifts helmet* we found it Bruce:… *walks back out of the living room* ~ Bruce: *staring at Talia* Talia: Hello beloved.  Bruce: … wha- why- how??? Damian: forgive me father but I needed to find my favorite dagger for show and tell tomorrow Bruce:… first of all no- ~ Bruce: *walking into Dicks room* hey Ivy- wait Ivy: oh hey bats! Believe me I don’t want to be here either but baby robin needed help finding his old suit Dick: *lifting his discowing outfit* we found it Bruce:… Ivy I will fund all of your plant experiments if you swear to never find that thing again-