Dick, To The Titans: OK This Is My Little Brother, Everyone Has To Be So Nice To Him!

Don’t mind me, just thinking about a young, twenty-something Bruce Wayne guiding Dick’s hand as he learns to write his letters, teaching Jason how to ride a bike, putting Power Ranger stickers on Tim’s knees, leaving Tooth Fairy Money under Stephanie’s pillow, playing hide-and-seek with Cassandra, watching Damian play with dogs at the dog park, and helping Duke with his algebra homework on the kitchen counter. You know, dad stuff.

It's actually funny how humans decided "fuck living in caves with all these creepy crawlies", got out of caves, built houses that have all the nice parts of a cave without any of the yucky parts, and then all the little bugs and spiders and other creepy crawly creatures that used to also live in caves thought "sweet, new and improved caves" and moved right back in with us.

Yea im gonna throw up thought of this scene instantly

Jason as a theatre kid means so much to me, so I am here to share a slightly related concept with you - Jason, who helps a small theatre group in local Crime Alley school.

It is obviously nothing grand. The school itself is quite poor, barely functionating, but it is here somehow nowadays, and a small group of five kids are so enthusiastic about the whole thing! They don't have anything else, though, so when Jason notices them, he decides... to help them out. He is great with sewing and stuff, so at first, he starts helping them with making costumes. Then, slowly, he helps them more with others things - scripts of their staging, lighting, decorating. He suggests different plays, reads it with them to see, who is interested. And soon other kids start to get interested, too! Even the ones that skipped the school, deciding to give up on a very poor education system there. Jason inspires them.

(And Red Hood starts sponsoring a school; some of his goons turn out to have a very old teaching licence that they give up, because being an honest man with a work wasn't much of a choice, but that's beside the point.)

And that's how Alley of Crime gets their own theatre with a bunch of talented kids.

A Robin’s most important weapon is the ability to cry on command -

the second most important weapon is to sic dad on whatever villain made his precious child cry 😢

Imagine for me please Gothamites mocking Batman because sure he’s their ‘savior’ and all, but he’s also one of them and it’s been a few years since he’s become Batman so he’s well known and just- Batman: *growling* go home! Teenager:… gO hOmE~ like what are you? My dad? Batman:… Teenager:… I’m kidding please don’t adopt me - Batman: I am vengeance. I am the night. I am Batman.  Gothamite: ~I aM vEngeAnCE~ like do you practice that in the mirror? Batman:…  - Batman: don’t sell drugs to students Drug dealer: doN’T sElL dRuGs tO stUdeNtS- please as if you didn’t need drugs to live in college  Batman:… Batman:… just… not too much Drug dealer: *scoffs* of course not dude I don’t want them overdosing we need more smart people who don’t want to kill everyone- plus if they die I lose a customer Batman:… good to know

Teenager: *walking home from school, drops books* Batman: *watching from a nearby roof* damn that sucks Teenager:... Batman: Teenager: *grumbles as they bend down to grab stuff* Batman: stay in school! Teenager: *flips him off* ~ Visitor from Metropolis: ugh omggg this city is soooo grosss! its because none of you have superman! all you have is that wannabe furry Batman! Gothamite:... *looks up and spots Batman* yeah you right Batman: fuck you! Gothamite: *grins and flips him off* Batman: *leaves* Gothamite: *beats the shit out of the Metropolian for saying something as blasphemous as that* ~ Gotham citizen: ugh i got my hair all done and no one notice- Batman: *from above* ohhh emmm GGGGG that sucksssss Citizen:.... Batman: :) Gothamite:.. no one asked you you furry black hotpocket Batman: :( ~

*looking at a picture of robin!dick on top of batman crying at a joker who didnt even doing anything yet*

Jason: BAHAHAHA

Dick: WHAT?!?! I was afraid of clowns! Sue me!

Tim: .....you LIVED at the CIRCUS!

On Christmas Eve Cass Steph and Dick all break into Tim’s apartment to bring (kidnap) him to the manor for Christmas and see the usual stuff the ungodly amount of coffee and paper work for WE minimal decorations which they expect what they didn’t expect was the mountain of presents which isn’t a total shock Tim is a rather prominent socialite but at closer inspection half the gifts are from different villains/rouges some of the names include

:Ra’s Al ghul

:Edward nigma

:Harley Quinn

:Lady shiva

And MANY more names for obvious reasons they are concerned and when Tim is opening his front door and Steph starts demanding answers from him and dick starts begging him not to turn into a supervillain (cass is drinking tea on the couch ready to enjoy the show) he is confused and and then the rest of the bats show up and start trying to talk him out of becoming evil (except Jason who thought this was hilarious and just a little terrifying) and now he is just trying to figure out what the fuck is going on until dick let’s it slip and they ask why Tim has presents from supervillains laying around and Tim just doesn’t know how to explain that he and said supervillains have exchanged gifts since his YJ days and pretends he doesn’t know why the gifts were there

So the bats start saying that they are gonna confront the supervillains cause this means that they might know secret identities until Bruce see’s an open card on the kitchen counter from Harley that is actually a invitation to a villain Christmas party which appears to be a few weeks old and a photo with Tim in his Red Robin suit hanging out at the party with all the rouges and Tim has to figure out a way to get out of this but he is Tim fucking drake so he can’t just admit it so somehow now everyone thinks there is a clone of Tim running around with the rouges which is why they send him cards gift etc and Tim goes along with it but so do the rouges (Tim to this day doesn’t know why but just thanks the gods they did) so Batman looks but can’t find any evidence anywhere eventually it goes to the back burner when joker escapes and they didn’t pick it up again and nobody figures out the truth until Harley invited Steph and cass to the same villain party and they see Tim discussing science stuff with ivy and now cass and Steph know but they don’t tell the rest of the bats and this doesn’t come up again until YEARS have passed and Tim is on really strong pain meds and felt so bad he admits it half of the bats think it’s the funniest thing ever the other half are concerned/upset Tim didnt tell them

(Tim still goes to the Christmas party’s ever year without fail)

( i wrote this at one in the morning it might not make any sense so…. Sorry?)

Ok but like- imagine Bruce Wayne deciding to become Batman at like mother fucking 15??? It would be the dumbest fucking thing ever

Imagine, Bruce after returning from patrol:

Alfred: master Bruce…homework

Bruce: I don’t need homework! Im Batman!

Alfred: Even Batman needs to do his homework!

Bruce: Hmp! *locks himself in his room and blasts my chemical romance on his speakers* nobody understands me…