No Guys Wait U Dont Understand She Really Doesnt Care About Him At All She Swears

Bruce shares custody of Tim with Harley Quinn

Yeah, you read that right. Gotham’s broodiest billionaire vigilante and the queen of chaotic energy are co-parenting Tim Drake. And, somehow, that’s not even the weirdest thing that's happened to the bats this year.

Why? Two words: Joker Junior.

The details are locked down tighter than the Batcave, but here’s what everyone knows (or guesses): Joker broke Tim in ways none of them can fathom. He didn’t just try to kill him—he tried to make Tim like him. And while Tim clawed his way back from the brink, he didn’t do it alone. Harley was there.

She was part of the nightmare. And then, unexpectedly, she was part of the healing. She stepped in, helped Tim survive when Joker was doing his worst. When it was all over, when Joker was (temporarily) gone, she didn’t vanish into Gotham’s chaos. She stayed.

And somehow, somewhere along the way, Tim started calling her “Mom.”

And Bruce didn’t stop him.

Cue the Batfamily losing their collective minds.

Dick is pacing the Batcave, gesturing wildly. “Bruce, this is Harley Quinn we’re talking about! You don’t just co-parent with a rogue! There are laws against this! Or, like, there should be!”

Jason is sitting on the Batmobile, arms crossed, voice dripping with disbelief. “She’s literally a former rogue. She tried to kill you! Like, more than once. This is insane, even for you.”

Steph is perched on the edge of a desk, trying (and failing) not to laugh. “Okay, but, like, can you blame Tim? Harley does make amazing pancakes. Better than Alfred’s, honestly—”

A scandalized gasp echoes from the other side of the room.

Cass just watches quietly, her head tilted, but there’s a small, knowing smile on her face. She gets it. She’s seen the way Tim softens around Harley, how he relaxes in a way he doesn’t around anyone else.

Damian glares at Bruce like he’s lost his last shred of common sense. “Father, you have truly surpassed yourself. Allowing that woman into the sanctity of our home—”

Duke raises a hand cautiously. “Okay, but can we at least talk about how Tim basically has diplomatic immunity now? No rogue in Gotham is gonna mess with him. He’s Harley’s kid!”

And it’s true. Between Harley’s reputation and Poison Ivy stepping in as Tim’s unofficial stepmom (because of course she and Harley got back together), the rogues have adopted a weird kind of reverence for him. Tim’s no longer just a bat to them—he’s Harley’s kid.

Picture this: Tim’s out on patrol, and Riddler has the gall to interrupt with a riddle—only to end it with, “You’re sharper than I thought, kid. Guess Harley taught you well, huh?” before disappearing into the night.

Harley’s brand of parenting is chaotic but deeply personal. She knows Tim’s tells, the way his hands shake when he’s overwhelmed or the too-quiet moments when he’s retreating into himself. She’s the one who sits cross-legged on the floor with him, working on puzzles and cracking jokes until the tension lifts.

She carries extra band-aids in her purse because “Ya never know when a fight with some thug is gonna leave ya with a paper cut!” She also leaves sticky notes on his projects with scribbled messages like “You’re a genius, baby boy!” or “Don’t forget snacks!” They’re goofy, sure, but they make Tim smile when he needs it most. She keeps a stash of snacks in the Manor because Tim forgets to eat when he’s working. She shows up with pancakes at 3 a.m., douses everything in syrup, and calls him “baby boy” in that soft tone that makes Tim feel… safe.

Even Harley’s chaos has an odd kind of comfort to it. She’ll burst into the Manor unannounced, dragging Tim into impromptu “self-care parties” with face masks, bad rom-coms, and every flavor of ice cream imaginable. Somehow, it works.

Ivy, on the other hand, balances Harley’s energy with her own structured nurturing. She insists on “proper nutrition” and occasionally sends Tim home with meal prep containers filled with organic, eco-friendly food labeled things like “Stress-Busting Smoothie” or “Brain-Boosting Soup.” If Bruce raises an eyebrow at it, Ivy simply reminds him that “The human body can only fight crime properly with the right fuel, Bats.”

One time, she cornered Bruce in the greenhouse, pointing an accusatory finger. “If you send Tim out on patrol without a proper meal or at least six hours of sleep, I swear, Bruce, your rose garden is compost.”

And while Harley is the queen of hugs and chaos, Ivy is the one who sits with Tim on the porch at night, talking softly about resilience and regrowth, using plant metaphors Tim pretends not to understand but secretly finds comforting. Once, after a particularly bad night, she gifted him a small cactus with a note: “Even when it feels like the world is trying to tear you apart, you’re stronger than you think. Also, low maintenance, like you.”

Bruce knows the family doesn’t fully understand. But as he watches Harley teaching Tim how to make lasagna one night, the two of them laughing as the kitchen turns into a war zone of flour and tomato sauce, he doesn’t regret it.

Sometimes family doesn’t look like you think it will. Sometimes it’s stitched together from the most unexpected pieces.

And sometimes, it’s an ex-rogue, a traumatized teen, and a brooding billionaire all trying to figure out how to keep the lasagna from burning.

Welcome to Gotham.

Awesome dragons

Soo, some dragons I had on my pocket a time ago :p

Yes yes, I like think they are some kind of gargantua in their maturity 👍

I love em btw ❤️💙

Jason, tapping his chin in thought: Right, so, Plasmius, super rich guy who wants to adopt you.

Danny: No, no, he also wants to fuck my mom. That's…EUGH DUDE. Like- that's my mom. No I don't care about how he wanted her since college that's still super gross.

Jason: How has he not moved on? Your mom has a whole kid.

Danny: A whole two kids. And a husband of over ten years.

Jason: Oh yikes. 

Danny, nodding emphatically: Big Yikes. And he has this whole one sided beef with my dad cause he has everything Plasmius has ever wanted and like honestly I dont give a fuck because in the timeline he does get with my mom - which Ew - he's a lying bastard and my ma isn't completely happy with him. 

Jason:...Other timeline?

Danny, waving his hand in a nonchalant manner: Vlad - who's Plasmius by the way - gave my friends fatal ecto-acne because he was having a ghostly acne flare up and basically said ‘find a cure or they'll die too’ and so I went back in time to figure some shit out and I kinda shifted things to the left and in the lab accident that gave Vlad ecto-acne it gave my dad ecto-acne instead of Vlad and then my dads life went to ruin but I fixed it by fixing the timeline so I mean everythings fine. Mostly.

Jason: what, and I cannot stress this enough, the fuck.

Storyboard Toothless is the best thing I've seen today...! LOOK AT 'IM!!!!

As Told By The Gotham Citizens

Very seriously doubt I will actually make a fic out of this but the DP x DC stuff has been rotating in my brain and I had to write this specific interaction down

wave with his critters

jason, watching tim cook: okay so he got the cookies

jason: grinding them okay, so like, cookie dough - oh adding milk, flour- okay, okay

jason: pancakes. cool, cookie panc- why are you baking them,

jason: WHY IS HE GRINDNING THEM UP AGAI- milk, flour- WHAT

jason: bro? whyd you

jason: whyd you do that??? why did you. make a pancake and made a pancake from a pan- waht??

jason: why did you square root a pancake???

Local baby bat upset that he cant simple punch his way out of every situation ends up making some new friends

I just wanted to draw baby Diana and baby Clark so heres baby Bruce from that role swap au making some friends by getting beat up (full au guide here)

Toothless hyytd

Toothless, you'll always be my best boy