Starting To Think A Cooler Headcanon For Clark’s Upbringing Might Just Be That The Entire Town Of Smallville

This is actually what the high guard has been doing for the 50 cycles I know this. And Starscream hates losing, but Soundwave can’t be bothered to do anything about that 😒 he’s like a wine mom rn, the way he’s babysitting the whole high guard too. He doesn't really play it with them cuz . It’ll be too easy with his ability, and he’d have to keep hearing everyone argue about who is what

The office but it's just the Batfamily.

Batman/Bruce, in the middle of a huge argument in the diner room: I have no favorites.

Batman (to the camera): My favorite is Cass. She can neutralize every single one of us.

Camera on cass eating a bagel, while Bruce narrates: And I respect that.

---

Duke: Cass.

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Cass: Duke.

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Steph: Cassie!

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Selina: You know who it is.

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Jason (to the camera): Dick? Oh that's so fucking easy it's the gremilin

Tim (To the camera): It's the gremlin.

Oracle/Babs (To the camera): Damian.

Steph: Evil child.

Damian: Me.

Dick as nightwing in a rooftop walking around with his hands: Oh my god, I can't belive you even asked me this??! We are all a big ass family and- We just keep going, like there's so many people here who I never saw before snd they just *poof* keep spalming and- Like cmon guys get a grip-

Dick (To the camera): *sight*

Dick:... It's Damian.

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Jason (To the camera) without batting an eye: Tim.

Cameraman: I'm sorry- *checks notes* I'm confused... Didn't you to- Tried. to kill Tim Drake once?

Jason:

Jason: So?

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Tim (To the camera): I feel like I should say Bruce....

Tim: I mean it needs to be someone I admire, respect, enjoy and stand up for despite all flaws.

Tim: Like despite every single wrongs right?

Tim:

Tim:

Tim, horrofied: Oh my god it's Jason.

Jason on the other side of the window behind Tim wearing a full Red-Hood atire and holding a cellphone gen 1: HA-HA.

----

Alfred (to the camera): It's not Master Bruce.

Bruce: Alfred? Definitely not me.

Dick: It's Bruce.

Alfred (to the camera): You don't raise as many children as the fate bring to your doorstep by yourself, take care of their wounds, wait for them in a cold night without getting any type of rest until you receive a single sign indicating that they got home safe and then get the luxury to choose.

Alfred (To the camera): I wouldn't even consider the luxury of choosing.

Alfred, serving tea at the dinner table: You all made my hair go gray equally.

----

Babs (To the camera): Me.

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Damian: This is ridiculous, obviously I would pick my father.

Damian to the camera: Nightwing.

---

Harley: I'm not even sure how y'all let me be part of this.

Camera man: We didn't-

---

Commissioner Gordon ( To the camera): If I'm being honest I feel like I resent every single one of them.

Commissioner Gordon: Except of course, my daughter.

Bruce doesn’t often give out hugs because they are the most powerful device in all of the dc universe.

One hug from this mammoth of a man will have you feeling the most comfort you’ve ever felt in your entire life. He’s bigger than most people so it completely engulfs you, it’s warm, and he squeezes everyone the right amount.

He’s got the art of hugging down to a science and he doesn’t even know it. All of his kids are too stubborn to ask for a hug and whenever he gives them out spontaneously they go silent in his hold, making him think that he’s bad at giving them.

It’s truly a powerful weapon.

The batkids also don’t ask for hugs often cause if they did they would always forgive Bruce. They wanna stay angry just a while longer.

Meet the Wayne Family :)

More Meet the Waynes 👇

[tumblr] holy shit it works

[tumblr]

WHO WAS GONNA TELL ME WE COULD DO THAT?????

[tumblr] WHY DO YOU JUST HAVE THIS FEATURE LAYING AROUND

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Dick Grayson's Robin Having No Filter and Giving His Father a Migraine

Robin!Dick: Hi Ivy!

Poison Ivy: Hi... young child. Stand over there, away from the giant rose.

Robin!Dick stepped away from the rose while staring at it mesmerized.

Robin!Dick: Can I-

Batman: I will take you home.

Robin!Dick pouted and walked off grumbling.

Ivy: He's adorable, if I didn't hate people I'd keep him. Okay, so run it back, you want me to stop my mission to protect mother earth and you were like "that's wrong for you to do". Continue with being wrong.

Batman: I should not have to explain to you how your mission to save the earth doesn't benefit people. It's destructive.

Ivy: Why? Because some people might die? A few dead bodies are worth it for saving the planet.

Robin!Dick (shocked): What?! You're killing people to do this?

Ivy: Yes... A few dead bodies are worth- Why is his face sad?

Robin!Dick (trying not cry): That's so mean.

Batman (glaring at Ivy): Now you've upset him.

Ivy (indignant): All right last I checked, the earth is dying, I'm just being honest kid. What do you want me to say? I'm not destroying the Earth, big corporations pumping out microplastics, pouring random crap in the lakes, Nestle... JUST NESTLE! They're screwing this planet like she's a two dollar hooker! I stopped eating their chocolate bars after the founder said water shouldn't be given to everybody!

Robin!Dick (shocked): Did he actually say that?

Ivy (calm): Basically he implied water shouldn't have free access because Nestle is the biggest proprietor of bottled water and no amount of explaining will ever fix the fact he said that! So whatever you're about to say, Batman, I do not want to hear it! They’re destroying ecosystems, hunting endangered species, killing crops and-

Robin!Dick (interrupting): Hold up, that's all she's trying to fix?

Robin!Dick turns to Batman.

Batman: She's not doing it in logical way.

Robin!Dick: She's a green woman who can control plants! Does she look like she wants to use our logic? No offense by the way, Ivy.

Ivy: You're fine, I love my body.

Robin!Dick (confused why they're fighting her): Why don't we help her, Batman? Has she asked for your help?

Batman (sheepish): Um... It's been brought up in the past.

Robin!Dick: Then why haven't you?

Ivy: Yeah, Batman, that so mean.

Batman: Because... She's a criminal and will let people die for the cause.

Robin!Dick: Well I mean if it's that nestle guy I don't... Don't necessarily blame her and I've seen you beat the ever loving shit out a lot of bad guys.

Batman: Language.

Robin!Dick (loud): The context needed the word. I love you Batman, I do, but let's be real you steal police information and beat up thugs. You have not paid the commissioner back for the fire hydrant incident. I'm sorry, but you break a lot of laws. You say you're doing it to save lives, so is she! Most are plant lives, but I get it. We would be arrested too, but we're lucky, she's not... it's not right.

Ivy (sincere): Thanks kid.

Robin!Dick: You're welcome and plus in any other city, we'd be going to prison. You'd be, I'd be tossed into an orphanage and that... That's not fun.

Ivy: A lot of kids in the system have been abused, he's got a point.

Batman (annoyed): Why are you arguing with me, Robin?

Robin!Dick: Because dang it, she might have a point! We can help her to a degree... In fact isn't the building we're in is being sued for what they did to a lake? All those ducks died.

Ivy (adding): Nothing can grow there for decades.

Robin!Dick: Yeah, the ecosystem is destroyed there.

Batman (yelling): Why are you ganging up on me?

Robin and Ivy: Because you know it's wrong!

Robin!Dick: You have told me you became Batman because the system is flawed and sometimes matters need to be taken into your own hands? How is she different?

Ivy: Okay... you're growing on me. Here, take a rose.

Ivy used her powers to hand the young hero a rose.

Robin (smiling and taking the rose): Aww, thank you.

Batman groaned then yanked Robin by the ear.

Batman: Excuse me, I have to talk to him in private!

Ivy: Aww, I'm starting to like the kid, go easy on him. He's smart, he knows what he's talking about.

Robin!Dick (being dragged out): Thank you, Ivy.

Ten minutes after the two argue, Batman comes to a compromise with his son and Ivy because he knows that Dick would absolutely not mind sabotaging factories or causing a fire with a supervillain to protect the planet. All he needs is a good reason.

Batman (driving them home in the batmobile): Could you not defend the actions of the bad guy in front of me next time?

Robin!Dick (eating McDonald's fries): Don't take me to one who has a point.

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Batman searched for Robin after taking down Joker.

Batman: Robin? Where did he go?

Joker (laying on the ground as Batman presses his shoe on his back): One of my goons went after him.

Meanwhile Robin does flips, tricks and runs around the room while giggling as the goon chases after him.

Goon: Little boy, little boy stop running!

Robin ran, but when the goon tried to grab him, the young hero grabbed his hand and clamped down with his teeth making contact with the mans hand. The goon screamed in pain.

Batman: He's down the hall.

Joker: There's no... Guarantee he'll win.

Robin kicked the goon in the crotch and ran off.

Goon (weakly): Right in the kiwis.

Robin!Dick: Batman, I got the last one!

Batman: Good job, Robin.

Joker: I hate your child soldier.

Batman: Thank you, I raised him well.

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Talia Al Ghul (to Batman): You-

Robin!Dick: You're out of his league.

Talia: What?

Robin!Dick: I'm just saying, it's obvious you have this stalker obsession with him, 'love' you like to call it, but Batman could do way better than you.

Batman chuckled covering his mouth.

Talia: Okay, I was telling him to stop his 'no-kill' rule and join the league, but also he wants me and some snot nosed brat won't have a say in any possible relationship!

Robin!Dick: Well, I'm 13 now and even I can see you shouldn't be together. Not even on a league level, but like come on, why would you get with a guy who doesn't want you or to be on your team? That's sad.

Talia (irate): You think I won't smack a teenager? I don't give a fuck!

Batman (disturbingly calm): Touch him and you'll wake up in the hospital.

Inspired by this post

Part 23

imagine Batman had to take care of the rest of the Justice League members after a magic user turned them into toddlers/ kids

Bruce: *warms Clark's bottle*

Bruce: *sets Diana in a playpen*

Bruce: *burps Hal*

Bruce: *changes Ollie's diaper*

Bruce: *puts Barry on a child leash*

Bruce: *gives Arthur a bath*

Bruce: *puts J'onn in a Martian onesie*

Bruce: *gives Vic a green teddy bear*

Bruce: *sings Dinah a lullaby*

Bruce: *plays peek-a-boo with Zatanna*

Bruce: *holds a baby photoshoot for Carter and Shayera*

Bruce: *downloads Little Einstein for Ray*

Bruce: *puts an iPad in front of Ted*

Bruce: *starts training Billy to be Robin*

[later, back to normal]

Ollie: We're gonna pretend we don't remember all that?

Everyone: Yep.

Justice League Origin-Swap AU

Roleswap AU, where their powers are the same, but it’s their origin stories that get swapped.

Clark Kent really should have known better than to break into a sketchy biochemistry lab during a thunderstorm, especially with the amount of flagrant OSHA violations.

On war-torn Arcera, Clan Allehnz hires a smuggler to take their youngest chicks to safety, days before the final nuclear exchange.

Sister Diana of the Order of Themyscira is chosen to take on the mantle of a fallen Lady of Justice, and with it, the duty to spread truth and justice to the galaxy.

Hal Jordan, crown prince of the lost city of Oa, falls through the Veil protecting them from outsiders after a dare gone wrong.

Bruce Wayne only discovers that he’s the heir to the Night Court, largest of Gotham’s Fae Courts, after his parents are assassinated by a rival for the Shadowed Throne.

Arthur Curry, only son of a wealthy shipping magnate, uses his inherited wealth, relics and magic to stop evildoers by night and protect the sea and its inhabitants by day.

I love Toothless so much as a disabled dragon. Literally some of the coolest dragon rep in any media ever and he's canonically disabled from almost the first moment we see him on screen. And he's a badass. And it's part of him (they don't ignore it! It's a big deal if his prosthetics aren't working properly!) and it just makes him cooler. Don't even get me started about Hiccup's prosthetics literally interlocking with Toothless's--