Nikolai Getting Turned Into A Bird And Being A Menace In The Decay. No One Is Safe From Him He’s Either

*Chuuya holding injured Dazai in his arms*

Dazai: How sweet. The princess was saved by a dwarf in a stupid hat.

Chuuya: *Drops Dazai into the harbor* Oh no I dropped the princess.

Kunikida: *looking through Dazai’s phone* You nicknamed everyone on your phone. How the hell do you know who’s who?

Dazai: I sometimes forget names so what?

Kunikida: Who the hell is “Hot blonde in glasses”?

Dazai: DON’T CALL THA-

*Kunikida’s phone rings*

Dazai:

Kunikida:

Dazai: I love you?

Kunikida: Run.

Get out of the Haunted Mansion Fyodor!

Today's Sigma: does NOT like magicians

I'm not being helpful by suggesting cannibalization

This is just the soul that haunts me saying this but... wanna make the bodies into food and serve it to random people?

Noctis: Make the dead bodies into food? I am rather interested in this.

Prompto: I know where you left the more recent ones.

Noctis: Grab em, also grab Baby Flower, I know she’ll be mad if we leave her out of something like this.

Prompto: I’m starting to get excited! What should we make?

Noctis, hums: Meat pies, some shredded meat, curry with meat chunks, tacos, sausages, we have a lot to do and bodies to gather, chop chop!

Prompto: Roger, I wonder how people taste like…

Noctis: We’ll get the temptation to find out when we make the stuff.

-(with Regis)-

Regis, begins to shudder: Ifrit is laughing at me, I can feel it.

Clarus, begins to scowl: That son of yours is up to something isn’t he?

Kuras: why are you covered in bite marks and why is she in a panic?

Leander: So pinning her is fun

Ais: told you

Fyodor: Sigma, you seem happier than usual today, did something good happen?

Sigma: I have obtained a relic that has given me great happiness.

Nikolai: Someone gave him a gun. Fyodor, please take the gun away from him, he’s shot at me twice already…

Mhin: what are you doing?

Mc: enjoying the night sky

Mhin: you fell off the roof

Mc: I fell off the roof send help.

Noctis: You're evil.

Ardyn: Now what makes you think I'm evil?

Noctis: You filled a vegetarian's house with raw butchered meat.

Ardyn: I was showing them what they were missing out on.

Noctis: You told a bunch of children that Santa eats naughty children.

Ardyn: I was told that when I was a child.

Noctis: You sprayed Prompto with a chocobo mating spray.

Ardyn: He is loved by chocobos even more now.

Noctis: You filled Loqi's closet with Aranea's high heels and told her he stole them.

Ardyn: He's short and I wanted to help him and Aranea needs to learn how to share.

Noctis: You super glued Gladio's sword to the ground.

Ardyn: To make him stronger.

Noctis: You somehow managed to get Nyx to warp into a wall. It took hours to get him out.

Ardyn: I have no excuse for that. I just wanted to do it.

Fallen: demons bring nothing but suffering and trouble.

Dante: Nah I also brought booze.