kiminis - solace.
solace.

18 | multi-stan !

475 posts

Latest Posts by kiminis - Page 9

1 year ago

come on, baby, don't say that JSKAHJDGAKSKSJAKKAKSKSJSK

><﹐ PETNAMES

park sunghoon ㅤx ㅤfemreader ㆍ genre fluff headcanon established rs warnings not proofread synopsis petnames and when he likes to use them ㅤ ─  390

note other members when

><﹐ PETNAMES

though it isn’t a petname, sunghoon calls you by your name the most. it’s not like he doesn’t like petnames, he does, he just prefers calling you by your name. to him it’s way more intimate than anything else he could possibly call you. he loves the way your name sounds coming from him paired with the i love you's only he’s allowed to tell you.

he calls you baby whenever you feel stressed about a project that you have due, sad because of a movie you two watched, or just feel icky in general. he’ll hug you, rubbing your back soothingly while he tells you how good you’re doing and how proud he is, how you’re okay and he’s always there for you, or how pretty you are. he calls you baby so that you know he means it and that he’s there to take care of you.

my girl is for when he’s feeling proud or smug. if he wins a small and petty argument the two of you had and you get all annoyed with him, he’ll laugh and poke at your cheek, “aw, my poor girl.” or say he bought you something really expensive and you ask why on earth he would spend that much on you (he can tell you’re secretly happy), he’ll reply with, “what? i can’t buy my girl pretty things?”

besides your name, he uses is babe the most. is it basic? yes. does he care? not really. he usually only uses it if you’re with your mutual friends or just.. out on errands or whatever else. he does it to subtly let other people know that you’re taken, he cannot stand the thought of anyone attempting to hit on you while he’s with you. he’s not one for pda so he does this to make your relationship known.

finally, he calls you honey when he’s tired or wants something from you. he’ll pull out a whiny “honey”, draping his arms over your shoulders as he asks you for whatever it is that he wants (usually he just wants you to do his chores). if he’s tired then, oh, he is the sweetest he could possibly be. he’ll cuddle with you and place a bunch of kisses all over your face, mumbling against your skin, ”love you so so much, honey.”

><﹐ PETNAMES
1 year ago

i need a jay, man 😞

❅ — ww. day 18: pjs. ✦ ₊˚

❅ — Ww. Day 18: Pjs. ✦ ₊˚

day eighteen: ❝ going shopping with jay cause he loves spoiling ❞

⟢ pairing : jay x reader ➖ genre : fluff ➖ requested : no ➖ warnings : no prns used but it is implied that reader visits sephora

❅ — Ww. Day 18: Pjs. ✦ ₊˚

glancing around the mall, you looked for yet another clothing store. not that you wanted to spend all of your boyfriend’s money, you just needed a new winter coat.

speaking of him, jay had two bags on each arm as he followed close behind. he’d said he would carry your bags and buy everything you got while you were out today. including food.

and it’s not like you willingly took the offer. he insisted on the fact that he’d spoil you today.

“what’re you looking for, love?” he asked, bringing you out of your frantic glances.

“h&m.”

“h&m?”

“uh huh, i need a new coat.” you said, continuing your search.

he hummed, watching you do your thing.

“honey, i think it’s this way.” he said smiling slightly, pointing straight.

and he was right. there was the bright red ‘H&M’ logo.

“ah, you’re a lifesaver.” you turned, placing your hands on the sides of his face to give him a quick peck.

running towards the store with a smile on your face, you went straight for the coat rack and whatever else you liked.

jay eventually caught up, standing a few inches behind you. he still had a smile on his face, seeing you all excited about certain things made him happy. especially if it meant he could get them for you.

you looked in the store for about ten minutes after picking out the cutest coat you could find.

“is there anything else you want, baby? any other store you wanna go to before we leave?”

“umm.. no, but i do wanna check out sephora again.” you bit your lip, thinking of any other stores to visit but only choosing one.

“if that’s okay with you.”

“of course it’s okay, that’s why i asked.”

“jay, i don’t wanna be the reason you go bankrupt, you know i could spend hours in here.”

“i know. and i also don’t care,” he kissed the side of your head. “if i go bankrupt, at least it’s because of you.”

❅ ❅ ❅

milan’s note: short n sweet 😽

PERM. TAGLIST: @haechansbbg @contyynishimura @sasfransisco @kgneptun @m1ko-xu @keiipopped (message or comment to be added)

WW. TAGLIST: @keiipopped @luvjongseong (message or comment to be added)

© KAIROOT 2023 — please do not steal, translate, or repost my work.

winter wonderland masterlist

1 year ago

my man fr

© tu2sunoo do Not Edit/crop Logo
© tu2sunoo do Not Edit/crop Logo
© tu2sunoo do Not Edit/crop Logo
© tu2sunoo do Not Edit/crop Logo

© tu2sunoo do not edit/crop logo

1 year ago

five minutes | l.m.h

Five Minutes | L.m.h
Five Minutes | L.m.h
Five Minutes | L.m.h

pairing... bf!minho x gn!reader tags... established relationship, disgustingly fluffy, excessive references to soondoongdori, minho is a cat personified, soft mimo!

operation put your boyfriend to sleep in five minutes is a go.

wc... 1.4k words a/n... ah, yet another domestic fluff fic featuring softy minho. a star specialty! sorry guys this is kinda my fav thing to write ever r u sick of me 😁 anywayz this was inspired by this soft thought and this tiktok like i saw it and immediately thought : lee minho.

ALSO ALSO! HUGE THANK YOU FOR 1K FOLLOWERS! i never would've thought i'd reach this milestone and words couldnt express how incredibly grateful i am for each and every one of you who read and enjoy my works <3 i love you guys thank you so much!

⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆

Minho turned the doorknob and pushed the front door open, greeting Soonie who stood by the entrance with a tilted head. Shutting the door, he hung his bag on the coat rack and bent down to pet his beloved cat’s chin.

“Hi, baby,” the cat nuzzled his head into Minho’s palm and circled around his arm, “where are your brothers, hm?”

Meow… Soonie walked off to the living room as if to answer Minho’s question. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he followed his cat toward the faint nose of your favorite series playing on the TV.

When he entered the room, Minho saw your figure strewn lazily across the couch. Dori was cuddled up against your chest and Soonie hopped up to join Doongie by your feet. His heart warmed at the sight of his loves all huddled together.

“Honey, I’m home,” Minho grabbed your attention with his gentle, sing-song tone, a cheeky smile plastered on his face.

You switched your attention from the screen in front of you to the man standing in the doorway, returning his smile and giving a small wave. “Hi, my love. How was your day?”

Minho padded over to you, scooped Dori up against his chest, and settled himself where the cat had previously taken solace in your arms.

“It was alright,” he said, scooching backward to press his back firm against your front. “Tiring, as usual, but it's fine.”

Though he couldn't see it, you nodded in acknowledgment and pressed a soft kiss to his head. You brought one hand up behind his ear to scratch at his scalp, something you had found he enjoyed.

“Do you want to go to bed already? It is pretty late.” From its place above the TV, the clock read 10:37 PM. “Maybe we should move our little cuddle session to the bedroom.”

Minho sighed and shook his head. “But, I'm already so comfy here. Plus, you wouldn't dare disturb the cats, would you?”

“Please, remember the last time we slept on the couch the whole night? I don’t think we want that happening again.”

“Y/n,” Minho called your name, dragging out the last syllable. “My back hurts so much! Remind me why we stayed on the couch again.”

“I told you we should have moved to the bed! But you wouldn’t listen to me,” you snickered at your boyfriend from the kitchen while you continued to whisk a couple of eggs for your breakfast.

You set the bowl down on the counter and walked over to Minho who was still lying on the couch. When you came into his sight, he made a show of stretching his arms and legs, akin to a cat, accompanied by a few exaggerated groans.

“I don’t think I can get up at all today. I should just call in sick,” Minho draped an arm over his face, letting the other fall limp over the edge of the cushion.

“Don’t you have an important meeting today? I doubt your boss would appreciate you missing that on account of an 'ouchy' back.”

“Well, maybe if you gave me more cuddles, I’d feel a bit better.” Minho peeked at you from under his arm, proposing this cute, yet slightly impractical, solution. “Unless you want me to miss work and stay at home with you today.”

“Alright, you big baby.” Rolling your eyes, you moved to straddle Minho’s lap, leaning forward to place a gentle kiss on his forehead. Now chest to chest, you wrapped an arm around his shoulders, letting the other one snake up his neck to play with the hairs at his nape.

The time you spent wrapped in each other’s warmth turned from seconds to minutes, the comfortable silence lulling you back to sleep. Minutes turned to hours, leaving Minho’s meeting unattended and the scrambled eggs forgotten on the kitchen counter.

“Ugh, at least give me five more minutes,” Minho offered as he continued to stroke Dori’s back, drawing a vibrating purr from the cat. “I don’t wanna get up yet.”

“Oh, come on, you have to brush your teeth anyways. Now get your lazy bum off the couch so we can cuddle on the bed.” You grabbed the throw pillow from behind your back and swung it at Minho’s side, accidentally startling Dori in the process. The cat jumped out of the man’s arms, causing him to throw a frown over his shoulder.

“Now look what you did! You’re scaring our babies.” Finally, Minho stood up, offering you his hand to pull you up as well. You met his hand with your own and anchored yourself up, giving him a sheepish smile.

“Oops.” You shrugged and skipped off to the bedroom, leaving your boyfriend with your three cats in the living room.

“Unbelievable.” Minho took a few steps towards the bathroom, paused, and turned back to look at his cats. “Well, are you coming with me or not?”

While your boyfriend finished his night routine, you lay on your shared bed and grinned to yourself. Operation Put Your Boyfriend to Sleep in Five Minutes was a go. You knew Minho was tired, and you wanted to send him off into a good night’s sleep in the most loving way you could.

The hallway light switched off as Minho opened the door to your bedroom, sporting a playful frown. It was time for Step One: Put him in a blanket.

“Come here, baby,” you peeled the duvet back and patted the space on the bed right next to you, beckoning your pouty boyfriend over to you. “Let’s get you to sleep, yeah?”

Trudging over to his side of the bed, Minho slid onto the mattress and pulled the heavy duvet over his body. Freshly washed, the warm, lavender-scented blanket immediately soothed his senses.

“You could’ve at least stayed with me while I brushed my teeth,” Minho continued to pout as he turned on his side to face you, “and, I don’t know, given me a back hug or something.”

Though his tone was playful, you recognized the look in Minho’s gaze. He yearned for your comfort, but he didn’t know how to ask for it. Reaching over, you cupped his face, gently caressing his cheek with your thumb. You peppered a few pecks on the corners of his mouth, kissing his pout away. Perfect timing for Step Two: Give reassuring pets.

“I’m here now, it’s okay.” His hair was soft in between your fingers as you threaded them through the fluffy locks. They smelled faintly of his coconut shampoo.

Tired, Minho let out a yawn, nose scrunched and eyelids shut. He leaned into your touch, humming contently.

Faintly, the door creaked open and you could hear light thuds on the carpeted floor, followed by a slightly louder thud on the bed as Doongie entered the bedroom and jumped up to join you. He stepped all over Minho’s body—drawing out a quiet yelp from the man beside you. You giggled as Doongie finally plopped down on Minho’s pillow, snuggling against the top of his head. This brought you to Step Three: Tuck him in.

With your boyfriend lying under the covers, you hooked one leg over him, moving your hand on his head to tuck it into your neck, cradling his body with no intent to stop any time soon.

For a second, the universe felt still. It was as though the ever-rotating hands on the clock had stopped moving, pausing to witness this intimate moment between you and Minho; as if even the angels in the skies above didn’t want this sweet gesture to end.

That was until Minho decided to take matters into his own hands and execute Step Four: Put one arm out for temperature regulation.

“It's too warm!” Minho whined into your neck, breaking the silence, and removed one arm from under the blanket, exposing it to the cold air. “Ah, that's better.”

He turned on his side and wrapped his now free arm around the small of your back, pulling you closer to him, if that were even physically possible.

Seeing your bodies pressed flush against each other, Soonie—who was previously lounging at the foot of the bed—crawled up the sheets and nuzzled into the barely-there gap between you and Minho, with Dori following suit.

Within five minutes of lying down, the night ended with your small family cuddled together on the warm, cozy bed, basking in each other’s comfort.

⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆

taglist: @kflixnet @jinnixxn @elllisaaa @captainchrisstan @laylasbunbunny @starsandrqindrops @kittymaryam-thebrowniefairy @forlix @mires-empire @quesweebs

comments, reblogs, and feedback are appreciated! © like-a-diamondinthesky 2023

1 year ago

sighs and cries in this life

not onlu do i wanna give hyunjin forehead kisses but i wanna run my hands through his hair and relax him into it until he falls asleep and then id draw him

2.51 a.m.

"sleepy?" you ask hyunjin, willing your voice to soften so you wouldn't startle him. he looks incredibly serene— laying his entire body on top of yours, face buried in the crook of your neck. his exhales come out in soft breaths, brushing against your skin like the faint caress of a feather.

"mm. you're comfortable," he says, further sinking his body onto yours, until you are both pressed tightly to one another, like two facets of the same coin. you stay silent, as he adjusts his limbs so his head would fall on top of your chest, right above your heartbeat.

"can i tell you something?" he speaks softly, as you gently thread through his ash blonde locks, twirling some strands of it around.

"anything."

"i listen to music everyday but your heartbeat is still my favorite sound," he confesses, a bit shyly, as he rests his chin atop your chest, peering up at you with eyes that reflect constellations.

"truly?" you grin, a tender smile etching on your lips.

"truly. please don't go where i can't hear it."

"i won't," you promise, and he leans back into your embrace, content with your response. your fingers never cease their soft caress on his scalp, making him sigh in tranquil surrender. you smile in adoration to yourself before pressing a tender skin on his forehead, then another one to his temple, the crown of his hair— anywhere your lips can reach, everywhere he could feel your love in.

1 year ago

What your cameraroll looks like if you're dating Bang Chan

What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
What Your Cameraroll Looks Like If You're Dating Bang Chan
1 year ago

yeah, no, the sunoo one is my last straw goodbye

acts of love

꒰◞ ◟𐙚 ꒱ ・ 엔하이픈 + femreader ? fluff established relationship warning not-proofread skinship & 1500 — #bookshelf

notes. blank

Acts Of Love

heeseung

is willing to listen to you talk for hours and hours of things he doesn't have a clue about— and it's as if he would listen with a single while he just nods, no, he is really invested and wants to know more about it. he'd ask you questions and even participate to the conversation; “woah really? okay so if i understood well.. is that so?” he always exclaims, with his both hands holding his head, a lovesick smile on and his face and eyes sparkling. he really loves to listen to you talk and hates when you think he doesn't care. “i know you don't care but—” his eyes become so wide they almost fall out, “what? who said that? please keep talking.. for my own sanity.”

plays video games with you and let's you win most of the time. to be completely honest, he doesn't even want to win in the first place. he asks you to play with him, claiming that he can ‘beat you at any game, any time’ but, he just wants to sit in your presence and hear your exclamations every time some thing happens on screen. is almost the one who celebrates the most when you finally win, ethereal smile on his face as he watches you doing your ridiculous victory dance. his favorite part of all this is when you kiss him and whisper a cute “thank you for letting me win” because you are not that oblivious.

jeongseong

learns to play your favorite song on the guitar, “just because” he always answers when you ask him why does he want to know your favorite song so bad. takes his time to memorize every single notes and lean to play it properly, just so it can be perfect for you. surprises you, mostly after a date or randomly and you are always so shocked because ‘this is so cute and affectionate???’ and he is so attractive when he plays the guitar, it makes you feel as if you are one of his groupies. the worst about it is that he tries to act like it's a normal thing to do, as if he didn't spend the majority of his time preparing this lovely attention for you “oh, it's really nothing. you deserve it after all”

bakes your favorite pastry with you; it can be a cake, a croissant and pancake, really anything. if he doesn't know how to do it, you learn it together. helps you put your apron on and reassures you when you accidentally let a fragment of eggshell in the pastry. loves to bake with you because he really feels like you both complement each other stupidly well. see, it must seem totally idiotic but the fact you whisk after he puts the eggs and milk in without one of you needing to say anything, really makes him believe you are soulmates.

jaeyun

is always so shocked when you say “i don't have any money on me” when you are out together and he asks you if you want to eat anything. his mouth almost falls to the floor and he gets so offended, it always makes you laugh. he keeps staring at you with his agape mouth and wide eyes for a long time, you apologize is the only way to make him work normally again; “please, i am so sorry i didn't mean it” although he is still a little bit baffled, he closes his mouth, “how do you not know that i would pass away before i let you pay anything..” he says with crossed arms, shaking his head as he scolds you.

walks by the side of the road when you both walk together, not because he heard of the rule or anything but certainly because he feels like it's a normal thing to do. each time he finds you walking next to the road, he holds you by both of your shoulders and carefully makes you exchange place with him. also, likes when you lean your head on his shoulder as you walk, hand in his pocket and giggling at one of his not-so-funny joke.

sunghoon

after you had a rough day, lets you lean your head on his laps and plays with your hair as you complain about how bad your day was. it's similar to the movies, where the client sits on a couch and rambles about how certain bad things decided to happen at the worst time and the therapist listens to them as they hum or even write things on their notebooks. except, he is not a therapist and isn't very good when it comes to giving comforting words— therefore, it's by playing with you hair, the exact way you like, that he shows you his support and gives you comfort.

adores to take pictures of you, especially candid ones. often takes pictures when you are not looking nor paying attention to him— when he thinks you look so beautiful that he might faint, he takes his phone and captures the moment. he has a whole album dedicated to you. he gifted you an advent calendar with all the pictures he took of you for your first christmas together. even bought a polaroid so he could get the pictures instantly and directly put them in his phone case.

seonwoo

if you told him you liked something once, he is definitely the type of boyfriend to buy or take it for you every time he sees it. he buys it for you so much you can most likely make a whole museum with it. for instance; “i love seashells” you told him once and, ever since then, he picks up every seashells he sees when he is at the beach. he makes sure he takes the most— and when he comes back, he gives them all to you. “sunoo, i told you i liked seashells once three years ago..” “so what? you don't like them anymore? tell me what do you like now then”

helps you with your routine every time he can, it can be drying your hair, straightening or curl them— or even help you hairstyling them, he is so happy to do it. definitely helps you put your lipstick or necklace if you ask him to, zip up your dress and never forgets to compliment you about it. also, likes when you help him get ready to; choose what shirt he should wear with that specific jean or help him with his hair too.

jungwon

puts his hand on every pointy corner to avoid you to get hurt by accidentally bumping into it. he does instinctively, it's a reflex to him and, most of the time, he doesn't even think before doing it. that is also why he follows you around the house as if he was your own shadow— you really didn't noticed it at the start, with how fast you did your own thing in the kitchen as he just goes where you go, you didn't see his hand on the pointy corner of the fourniture you were next two seconds ago nor how you bumped into things that didn't felt like an corner at all..

lends you his favorite clothes only because you told him you liked it. he would take it off just to give it you right then and there, but he can't, especially since you often compliments his style when he gets dressed to go out with you. so he finds a way to make you wear it when you are home— to be frank, he doesn't even need to trick you because you just straight up go into his dressing and put it on when you feel like it. then, he acts like it's yours after, “did you put your shirt in the laundry?” “jungwon, i fear it's yours..” “i gave it to you, don't you remember?”

riki

lets you drag him into whatever is your new interest at the moment— whatever you want to do, whatever you want to watch, whatever you want to learn; he does too. he is so cute about it too, for instance; if you are into crocheting lately and you are starting to learn how to do it, he comes up to you and asks “do we know how to do crochet or are we going to learn?” and you poke his cheek with your finger and a fond expression drawn on your face, “you are not obligated to do it if you don't want to” “what? we are a team, we are supposed to things together”

holds all your things for you— from your phone to your four shopping, to your big pink bag, to jacket you took off because you were too hot. he does it mindlessly, he sees something in your hands and instinctively take it in his own, no matter how light it can be fore you, he feels the need to do this for you. sometimes, even forgets to give it back to you when you goes back to your respectives homes or need to separate— so you have to get out and run after him when he starts walking away after you entered your home, because he still has your phone in his hand.

Acts Of Love

taglist open ❕@manooffline @ibsysbsfsunsbs @nwjws @lilriswife4life @alaezasmystery235 @teddywonss @tyussday @cholexxc @flickqr @yuviqik @wvnrqs @strawberrywonz @y-ves @isawritesss @filmofhybe @ikeucakes @gweoriz @hongincha networks @kflixnet @k-films @/k-labels

1 year ago

who eveb am I to get woken up by them 😔

waking you up

꒰◞ ◟𐙚 ꒱ ・ 엔하이픈 + femreader ? fluff established relationship warning not-proofread skinship kissing petnames & 700 — #bookshelf

notes. blank

Waking You Up

heeseung would not be trusted by you, to wake you up or anything that is bed related— you'd not even trust him enough when it comes to get out of bed on his own. and, even when he'd get out of bed alone, without you promising kisses afterwards, he wouldn't be able to wake you up. see, he would start well, shaking you a bit and whispering a “baby, it's time to get up..” you'd whine once and he'd give up immediately. he'd even settle himself under the covers and take your sleepy self in his embrace, “okay, five more..” the ‘minutes’ would go unspoken as he'd immediately fall asleep.

jongseong would be so, so, so tender with it. he'd sit on the edge of the bed, caress your cheek with his knuckles and, bend over to gently tell you that it's time. “princess, it's time to get out of bed.” he'd smile fondly smile when you start to whine and pull the cover over your head, using it as a barrier to block his voice from entering your ears and the sunlight from reaching your closed eyes. he wouldn't give up, he'd softly remove the cover from your face, “come one, i made breakfast for us.” he'd say. he'd help you get out of bed and hold your hand to lead you to the kitchen.

jaeyun would try to be as supportive as possible, also so careful. he'd open the shutter of your room a tad, just so a few rays of sunlight can reach you and prepare you to be woke up by him. he'd sit on the edge of the bed, passing his hand in your hair softly— he'd smile when you hum at his touch. “get out of bed, my love. we have a busy day today.” his hand in your hair added to his voice, would make you open your eyes. his pretty face would be the first thing you'd see. kissing your forehead in the most gentle way possible, he'd greet you.

sunghoon would have an heartache just by the thought of waking you up, he knows you want to sleep and, he'd find you so peaceful and pretty. if you are sleeping in the back, he'd put his hand on your back and start to rub it— with love and affection. “pretty, it's time to wake up.” he'd bend, so he can attain your ear and you'd smile at the warmth of his breath against your skin. he'd keep rubbing your back until you decide to get out of bed, as if it was a massage; he loves to watch your satisfied expression as he keeps going.

seonwoo would wake you up as soon as he gets up, as he loves for the both of you to get ready together. he'd be gentle with the way he does it, taking you in his embrace— mind still clouded by sleep, he'd stay still for a moment, allowing your warmth and his to hug each other. “sweetheart,” he'd whisper, voice deep and hoarse because of his sleepy self. “it's time to wake up..” you'd whine something along the line of ‘ten more minutes’ and, he'd tell you to not be lazy, “we can cuddle on the couch, after getting ready.”

jungwon would wake you up with kisses— sweetly all over you face. to be completely honest, he would most likely get on top of you at the very first. he'd put his whole weight on you, “get off of me, jungwon..” you'd whine, desperately trying to push him off but, the fact that you wouldn't even be fully awake wouldn't help anything. then, he'd start planting kisses all over your face to make your forget the fact he laying on you. it'd work of course, you'd start giggling like an idiot.

riki would be extremely patient and extremely caring when it comes to waking you up— especially if you tend to get grumpy and moody when you get woken up in the wrong way. simply, he wouldn't appreciate the idea of you starting your day the wrong way because of him. he'd kneel infront of the bed, putting one arm on the edge of it while is other arm extend so his arm can reach your hair. he'd smile when you start to move, eyes focused on your pretty face, “babe, come on.. let's eat breakfast together.”

Waking You Up

taglist open ❕ @manooffline @ibsysbsfsunsbs @nwjws @lilriswife4life @alaezasmystery235 @teddywonss @tyussday @cholexxc @flickqr @yuviqik @wvnrqs @strawberrywonz @aleiouvre @y-ves @isawritesss @run2x networks ❔ @kflixnet @k-films @/k-labels

1 year ago

the mole soulmate one always gets me with hyunjin huhuhu

Orange

hyunjin x reader. childhood friends to lovers. implied soulmates. hyune's pov.

this is the prequel & sequel to you're in the wind, i'm in the water. you need to read the prev fic first to understand how hyunjin and mc confessed to one another!!

this is very self indulgent but it's also my bd gift so i get a pass hehe also a tribute to one of my fav love languages which is peeling an orange for someone :')

based on Chemtrails Over the Country Club by Lana Del Rey,, so highly recommend listening to it while reading :)) feedback is appreciated as always <333

Orange
Orange
Orange

i'm on the run with you my sweet love

The beige sand warms the soles of your feet as you and Hyunjin run along the shore. His parents sit by a towel, watching you with idle curiosity as you’re propelled forth by the brisk winds; and a sense of feedom only found in the tender hearts of children.

Hyunjin doesn’t know where you’re taking him. He didn’t question you when you entwined your fingers with his before running away, your footprints etched upon the sandy canvas. His sole attention was on your clammy hand, tightly clasping his.

Hyunjin didn’t yet understand what it meant to crave the hand of someone in yours, for it to feel natural for fingers to hold one another. He was only seven. What does one really know at this age?

But he knew that he was drawn to grand things. The beauty of fireworks as they unfold in the sky, dazzling colors rivaling the hues of sunsets. To the towering sunflowers his mother takes him to see, so tall their petals almost seem to be reaching for the sun’s embrace. To the full moon and the way it hangs close to earth, as if yearning to enter our horizon, to sink into the soil and rest.

But in that moment, as he watched your gleeful smile, the blush tinting your cheeks as you tugged him along, a different amazement grew within his soul. It was quiet, it was soft, it didn't overwhelm his seven-years-old heart. It was enough.

You finally stop by a rock, settling in the sand with your hair fanning around you like a halo. Hyunjin hovers over you, his tentative gaze tracing your features, trying to pinpoint what had made that peculiar feeling pour over his body, like candle wax finally meeting its destined mold.

He doesn't find an answer, only your kind smile as you tap the place near you. You were giddy, as if you had run far when his parents remained mere meters away.

Hyunjin had noticed this urge in you to flee, to wander, always. He didn't know what it means. He thought that perhaps you didn't know either. He wondered if you'd ever run away from him. The question burned the tip of his tongue.

"Will we always run together?" Hyunjin suddenly asks, kneeling to meet your eyes.

"If you want to," you shrug. "Will you run away with me when we're older?"

"Where to?" he asks, a note of apprehension coloring his tone.

"I don't know. We'll know later."

"Okay."

"You pinky promise?"

"I do," Hyunjin entwines his pinky with yours, before leaning down to press a chaste kiss on your thumb pad. He avoids your eyes as a dusty blush cascades on his cheeks, akin to the fading pink of a sunken sunset. You giggle, reciprocating the kiss before pressing your thumbs together.

"Sealed forever," you grin, eyes disappearing into moon crescents. Your contagious happiness mirrors instantly on Hyunjin's face, his nose scrunching up in delight.

He wants to keep this smile on your face, he thinks, this intricate joy that dawns upon your features, brightening up your face, making your pinky in his feel lighter, warmer.

So, he takes out an orange from his pocket.

"Where did you get this?" you chuckle, eyes widening in delight as if presented with the world's most treasured jewel.

"A vendor gave it to me," he shrugs, handing it to you.

Your thumb punctures the tangerine's thick skin, making the fruit’s juice drip down your hands. You attempt to peel it but the skin breaks instantly, falling into the sand.

"Here, let me," Hyunjin offers, taking the orange from your hands, peeling it for you.

A strange warmth slowly spreads through his being, akin to tree roots anchoring onto the soil, to the unfurling of petals on the first day of spring. It feels good, for some reason, to do this mundane task for you.

This newfound feeling only solidifies when you smile brightly at him, breaking the fruit into two halves and handing one part to Hyunjin.

You no longer look like you want to run. You look content here, simply sharing an orange with him.

Hyunjin suddenly wants to buy you a whole crate of tangerines. Maybe even a farm of it- just trees upon trees that he can plant for you. He chases the thought away, he's only seven, he doesn't have money, where would he even store the oranges?

Hyunjin didn't have the answer to this question, nor the million ones swirling in his mind. But he knew your smile, the kindness in your eyes, the lingering scent of oranges on his fingers, even after washing his hands. And the word that sat heavy on his soul, from that night forth.

Hyunjin knew he loved you when he was seven years old.

there is nothing wrong contemplating God; under the chemtrails over the country club

"Found you," Hyunjin whispers, reclining on the rooftop near you.

"Wasn't hiding from you," you respond just as softly, your gaze fixed on the turquoise sky overhead. Your words cause Hyunjin's heart to swell within his chest, growing, expanding, pushing against his ribs, yearning to escape and splatter at your feet.

His emotions were always so grand- his happiness consuming his entire being, the sadness, the loneliness rattling his bones with an invincible cold. Then the love for you, not in dependence, the way the planets orbit around the sun. But with choice, because he wants to, craves being near.

"What are you doing?" he asks after a while, his voice slightly hoarse.

"Watching the chemtrails," you point out a tiny plane leaving a white trail in the sky.

"It looks so far away," he whispers in wonder, and you hum with a melancholic expression. Hyunjin curls his hand into a fist, resisting the urge to smooth the delicate frown etched on your brows.

"Didn't you like your birthday celebration?" he finally asks. He knows the answer before you quietly say, 'yes.' You were never one for the chic attire, the fine china and polished silverware reflecting the guests fake smiles. You only ever came to the country club for Hyunjin.

"I just... these people are here for me, supposedly. And yet, I feel so invisible downstairs. I bet no one even noticed my absence."

"I did," he replies instantly, contradicting you vehemently, wanting to dispel the shadows that cloud your mind. "And... I brought you an orange," he adds, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. It grows when you beam at him, the chemtrails momentarily forgotten.

"Did you?"

"Mm, here," he swiftly peels the fruit for you, instinctively breaking it into two halves.

"I'm sixteen and I don't know how to peel a tangerine because of you," you giggle, biting into one part eagerly. Water dribbles down the side of your mouth, and Hyunjin delicately wipes it away, his hand cradling your jaw gently.

His heart beats wildly, drowning out the country club's orchestra. He's never been this close to you, noses nearly bumping into one another.

"Don't learn how to," he whispers, licking his lips nervously. He hopes you can't feel the tremor in his hand as it slides down your cheek.

"Why?"

"Then you won't need me anymore," he says honestly, and your eyes widen at his words. Say it, his heart pleads, I can't contain this love anymore. Hyunjin shakes his head, silencing his own thoughts. He'll make room for it; his heart will expand, even if it means bursting at the seams. He can't face your rejection.

"Can I ask you something?" you say after a while, still as close to him.

"Anything."

"Do you ever feel like you don't belong anywhere? You have friends and family, but you feel like..."

"Nobody's son?" he suggests.

"Yeah, nobody's daughter."

"Maybe we're not meant to belong to anyone else but ourselves."

"Isn't that sad?" you ask, bringing an orange wedge to Hyunjin's mouth. "What if I don't always have myself?"

"Well, you'll always have me."

"Do you promise me?" you ask eagerly, eyes wide, tone almost desperate.

"I promise." The fog dissipates, light spilling over your face once again.

"Even though you're so sought after?" you giggle.

"I'm not!"

"You are! Everybody wanted to talk to you downstairs. You're always the man of the hour," you wink, lying down on the floor once again.

"Really? I didn't notice," he says, settling next to you.

"Mm, you never notice anything," you sigh, resting your cheek atop his shoulder.

It's quiet again, save for the tranquil sound of your breaths. Your eyes are trained on the sky, following the path of each plane.

"They look really tiny."

"Maybe we're the small ones," you muse.

Hyunjin doesn't agree. Not when his love for you feels almost ancient, drawn from the depths of the very first fountain of love. It has stayed with him for nine years, intermingled with the very molecules of his being. You can't be small when what he feels for you is grander than the world.

"Maybe we are," he says as he slides an arm underneath your back, pulling you closer to his chest.

"Hyune," you call out softly.

"Mm?" he hums in reply.

"What do you think you're made for?"

I'm here to love you, he wants to say, achingly, fully, on your grand days and your small ones. To fall apart at the altar of your soul and to rise anew, by you, for you. To be yours.

"I'm here to peel you oranges." He whispers instead, his confession, for now.

"And I'm here to eat them, then."

we laugh about nothing as the summer gets cool; it's beautiful how this deep normality settles down over me

"Did you know you have a straight trail of moles on your back?" Hyunjin whispers, his cool breath akin to a gentle zephyr.

"It starts here," he bestows a tender kiss beneath your shoulder blade, as if marking the start of a constellation. "Then you have another one here," his lips brush against your skin, coaxing forth delicate goosebumps, like ripples on a moonlit pond. "And here," he trails down your spine, his mouth weaving a trail only he can see. "And a final one here," he lingers longer near the last mole, lips meeting your lower back delicately, akin to the tender graze of a feather.

If you had told Hyunjin that he would freely kiss your moles, hands trailing down your skin scented with chlorine and vanilla, he would have thought you were insane. But now he has you, because you want him too, against all odds. Hyunjin wasn't alone in his love; every emotion in your soul mirrored his own. Two sides of the same coin. Two halves of the same tangerine.

"And then... it wraps around your stomach," he flips you around until you face him, giddy giggles escaping your lips. "You see it? It goes right here, another straight line," he whispers in wonder, tracing over the moles on your skin as if in worship. There is so much he longs to articulate, words yearning to spill from his mouth. He realizes he can say them now, drape them over your body like a blanket knitted with love.

"Someone plucked stars and arranged them on your skin. You're a galaxy on your own, you know that right? So beautiful," he whispers, eyes wide in adulation, raking over each feature of yours, so much they're seared behind his eyelids. The only sight he sees when he goes to sleep.

"So are you," you smile, hands gently cradling his cheeks. Hands that held him at age seven, then eight, ten, thirteen, and twenty. Hands that dried his tears, patted his back, and played with his hair. Hands that are much more sacred than his own.

"No, you don't understand," he hovers over you, gently smoothing down your hair. "You're so beautiful, so much it dizzies me, consumes me. You consume me, entirely, and I-" He sucks in a deep breath as you smile lovingly, reassuringly.

"I know," you say. "I feel it too."

"I can't believe this is real," he shakes his head, thumb tracing your lower lip gently. "I didn't even plan on confessing when i brought you to this pool. And yet... it feels natural for us to be this way."

You nod, grinning. "Like we belong to one another."

"I told you I'd stay," his eyes soften, capturing you with the same tenderness as always, savoring every part of you.

"You always keep your promises," you smile, hand sliding down the nape of his neck, smoothing a stubborn tuft of hair.

Normal, that's the elusive term he was looking for. It is normal for him to hold you, to kiss you, to look into your eyes and find love swimming in your irises. It is the way it's supposed to be between you. He couldn't ever think of another outcome.

His eyes trail down to your arm, where two moles match perfectly with his, down to the placement, the space separating them both.

"Is this where we kissed each other the most in our past lives?" he trails off, knuckles brushing against your arm gently. You mirror his touch.

"So you believe we're soulmates?"

"Mm, I've always known."

"And why didn't you tell me?" you grin, tilting your head to the side.

"I peeled you tangerines."

His words seem to ignite something within you, memories of each time he peeled you oranges flooding back. Every birthday, each time you were sad, every time the fruit was near.

You stand up, straddling Hyunjin's lap, and then you kiss his eye mole, then the one on his cheek, trailing down his jaw mole, his neck, his arms.

"What are you doing?" he giggles, warm hands on your lower back.

"Making sure those moles show up in our next life too."

And at your words, Hyunjin swore that the citrusy scent of tangerines suddenly wafted in the air.

washing my hair, doing the laundry, late night TV i want you only

Your legs are comfortably propped on top of Hyunjin's, matching pairs of beige pajamas seamlessly merging into one another. The sweet scent of shampoo lingers in the air—a fragrance Hyunjin carefully massaged into your hair twenty minutes ago, his fingers still as gentle as they grazed your scalp, now at the age of twenty-six.

Nearly two decades later, Hyunjin still knows that he loves you. It is a different one from the love he felt at seven—a metamorphosis akin to the moon's phases, from crescent to full, distinct yet continuous. It clung to his being, melted into the very essence of his soul.

"Just how many white shirts do you own?" you giggle, folding another pair of Hyunjin's clothing, the melody of your laughter still rattling the insides of his heart. He smiles sheepishly, planting a tender kiss on your forehead before responding, "You wear half of them with me."

"Your clothes are mine. You agreed on this when you proposed to me," you state matter-of-factly.

"And what else did I agree on?" he smiles, placing two pairs of matching socks in the basket—yours and his.

"That you'd kiss me instead of doing the laundry," you say mischievously, and he chuckles, tilting his head back. The clothes are momentarily forgotten as he lowers your body onto the couch, one hand cradling your head.

"You know I can't say no to you," he smiles, left dimple appearing as it always does when you're near.

"I know," you grin, pulling him down by the hem of his pajamas, your lips meeting his.

Hyunjin still kisses you with the same quiet passion, slowly, as if rediscovering you all over again. His hand cradles your jaw, thumb caressing your cheek gently, as his lips find yours again and again—rosy, plump, seeking solace in your familiar warmth.

He's always been drawn to mysteries, grand things, and overwhelming emotions that defy comprehension. Things he'd never fully know, things he'd never be bored of. Yet, with you, it's different; he knows you, he's learned you, and he loves you more every day—purposefully, by choice, because he can't fathom a reality where he doesn't.

His lips press upon yours one last time before he pulls you onto his lap, burying his head in the crook of your neck. "You smell nice," he whispers.

"I smell like you."

"I know," he smiles, a gentle breeze escaping his lips and caressing your skin.

He closes his eyes, savoring the quietness, the domesticity of the scene—the folded laundry on the table, the background hum of the TV, the meal you'll cook later, waltzing under the fridge's light. You, the one love of his life—the small love and the grand one, the first love and the last one. The embodiment of it all.

Your arms drape around his shoulders as you relax in his hold, your breaths syncing into a tranquil rhythm. He's built himself a home in the ridges of your collarbones, a place for him to rest in the crook of your shoulder blade. Both of you are okay, both of you are safe.

"Do you remember when we were seven? We traveled together for the first time," you speak after a while, a weighty emotion enveloping your voice.

"I do."

"You promised me we'd run away when we grow older."

"I did."

"I don't want to run anymore. I'm content with you, right here," you whisper, and the words feel like sunflowers blooming in Hyunjin's chest. "I was so scared of growing up, of never feeling like I belong. To myself, to anyone. But I do, with you."

"Always," he pulls away, bringing your hand to his mouth, leaving sweet kisses on your ring finger.

"Thank you, my Hyune," you say, tears gathering in your eyes like morning dewdrops on leaves. "Thank you for peeling my oranges."

Your nose brushes against his, his thumb drawing circles on your palm.

"Thank you for pretending you don't know how to."

1 year ago

jay and the glove compartment is so accurate I am sobbing

ENHYPEN HYUNG LINE: Passenger Princess! ♡

help, the tiktok on what type of boyfriend they'd be once in the car PLSSS im gonna kill myselfffff.

en- hyung line x (implied) afab! reader , lowercase intended.

ENHYPEN HYUNG LINE: Passenger Princess! ♡

☆ ∘⁠˚⁠˳⁠° *⁠. 。 ∘⁠˚⁠˳⁠° *⁠. 。 ∘⁠˚⁠˳⁠° *⁠. 。 ∘⁠˚⁠˳⁠° *⁠. 。

lee heeseung

he'd so+#(#!# he'd so help you put on your seatbelt, when he sees the sun shining a bit too hard, he'd put down the visor for you (lit-ass took that from the tiktok), he'd place your hand on the shift, only for his hand to cover yours. driving with one hand, i also think he'd sometimes teach you how to drive like every once a month, simply because he doesn't want you driving :(, he wants to be the person that takes you anywhere and everywhere<3

park jongseong

HELP, he's so mwamwa, like, the glove compartment?? it would have all the shit you like, would have your snacks in there and would restock it like, everyday since he wouldn't want ants n stuff in there. he DOESN'T let anyone touch the glove compartment. nuh-uh, and once the visor is put down, there'd be some bling bling with your initial on it above the small mirror + a polaroid of the two of you <3.

sim jaeyun

don't even, literally takes glances at you whenever he can, like plsss!!!!!!!! focus on the road! he'd either be holding your hand, or his hands on your thigh. literally so touchy, like it's one of his love languages, he can't help it, he'd find a way to make sure y'all r touching, he'd do the same gear shift thing as hee would, his thumb rubbing against your hand oh pls.

park sunghoon

you're always in charge of the music, and no one is allowed to sit in the passenger seat unless it's his mom, but he doesn't let anyone adjust the seat either, he knows you adjust your seat to your liking, and ever since then, he's only allowed you in the passenger seat. his car is also decorated with little things you bought him, like his girl needs to be appreciated like amen!!! a picture of you would be hanging on the rear view mirror and he'd always be taking you anywhere you want.

1 year ago

giggling and twirling my hair because I know what he smells like after buying his inspired‐cologne¿ on tiktok

cologne

♡ heeseung ﹒ female reader genre fluff & secret relationship (?) word count 0.2k warnings none ( bookshelf )

Cologne

your favorite thing about heeseung had to be the smell of his cologne.

if heeseung had entered the room, you would automatically know it was him from the scent that lingered in the air.

heeseung had known about your discreet obsession over his cologne; purposely spraying 2 to 3 more mists than usual.

despite the relationship being hidden from the others, the subtle acts he did showed that he truly cared.

on colder days, heeseung would always lend you his blazers, draping them over your shoulders to conceal the cold.

“people will notice,” you reminded him. but heeseung wanted nothing more but for you to be warm on days like these. you liked how the blazer still had the faint smell of his cologne, the scent automatically making your head spin.

these awkward moments that were shared between the two of you made the bond stronger, the warm blush dusting your cheeks was never unnoticed by heeseung.

heeseung subconsciously pulled you closer to him, in hopes of providing extra warmth. he steals quick glances at you, admiring the features that were displayed on your face.

“i love you more than you think.”

Cologne

© okwons

note : short drabbles r the cutest

taglist is open @bunreis @hysgf @beomgyu-stan-present

1 year ago

crying in class

Ten Things Lee Felix Says When He Thinks You’re Asleep — Fluff, Established Relationship, A Dash

ten things lee felix says when he thinks you’re asleep — fluff, established relationship, a dash of angst

chan | lee know | changbin | hyunjin | han | FELIX | seungmin | jeongin

Ten Things Lee Felix Says When He Thinks You’re Asleep — Fluff, Established Relationship, A Dash

one. i was too embarrassed to tell you this earlier so i’ll just say it now that you’re asleep. everything reminds me of you… i think it’s my brain finding every excuse to just think about you. but, when i passed by the market earlier, i saw some strawberries and i thought of you when i saw them. i should drop by and buy that shortcake you love so much tomorrow. yeah, i should do that. i can already see your pretty smile.

two. do you dream of me like i dream of you?

three. you know, me and the boys were talking earlier about the future and i think that was the first time i talked about the future with so much hope. i don’t know, i just—i’ve always been afraid of not knowing. the future is just so uncertain so i always hated talking about it. but, how lovely to think of the future when it’s with you.

four. sometimes, when i’m so exhausted, i think, what is the point of all this? but because of you, i have a reason to live. when i look at you, i see how beautiful life is.

five. god, (name), you’re driving me insane. you’ve stolen a piece of me and i’m afraid it’s yours to keep forever.

six. the sun shined bright today. it made me think of you.

seven. i get scared really easily. hyunjin and i were watching a horror movie earlier and i got so scared. he teased me for it, told me i had a long list of things i’m afraid of. he’s right, though. but then, jinnie asked me a hypothetical question .. if i’d ever jump off a boat. i said no obviously, but then he asked me if i’d change my answer if you were drowning. and you know what i said? i said yes without even thinking about it. i get scared really easily, but if it’s for you, i’ll do anything. i love you—i love you even though i’m scared.

eight. i saw you crying earlier. it seemed like you didn’t want to tell me about it but i heard you. it breaks my heart to know you’re hurting. please, please come to me. you know you don’t have to bear that pain alone anymore. i’m here, angel.

nine. in my eyes, you’re already doing well.

ten. i think i was always meant to find you and fall in love with you, and i want you to know i will love you in every lifetime after this one too. please come find me.

1 year ago

only you

Only You
Only You
Only You

mafia-bf jungwon x fem.doctor reader

sypnosis jungwon got hurt and you‘re the only one he wants - genre fluff, angst - warnings blood, needle, stabbing wound, cursing - wc 0,8k

a/n. hey there i posted earlier than i expected wohoo have fun reading <3

knocking onto his door rather harshly, annoyed and concerned written on your face

15 minutes ago you got a call from his personal assistant telling you he got himself injured during a mission and wouldn’t let any doctor help him if it’s not you

and here you are, not so patiently waiting for him to open the god for saken door

„i swear to god Jungwon if you don‘t open the door i will not come again to treat your ass ever again.“

not hearing any response or movements you get anxious he might be actually bad injured and fell unconscious

fishing out the keys you got from him in cases for these from your back pocket, feeling absolutely stressed

as you step slowly into the room you see the light shining through the door from the bathroom

walking to it and knocking on it, not hearing a response once again

„when i step in and i see you not unconscious i will smack you for not answering me even once mark my words“

you turn the knob and the first thing you see is a topless Jungwon right infront of a sink full with tissues tainted with blood

„fucking shit“ you speed walk up to him and take a look at him, seeing him drenched in sweat his bangs sticking onto his skin and his breathing a bit unsteady

„took you long enough“ he says the audacity

„what the fuck happened“ you say full with panic, him taking his hand off from his adomen

„got a bit traced by a knife?“

„traced?! - you mean stabbed“ taking as many tissues as you can and pressing your hand onto the wound trying to stop the bledding as best as you can making him squeeze his eyes shut and lean onto the sink for support

„love, don‘t be so harsh god damn“ glaring at him „you‘re so stupid you are bad injured but you didn’t let your doctors treat you? are you kidding me you could have passed out before i got here and it could have gotten more complicated“

looking up at him you see him smiling at you, „i love to see you care for me“

smacking his arm and pressing onto his wound a bit more had him throw his head back

„fuck okay sorry“

„try to lay down slowly so i can treat your ass“

„always so nice to me“ he says with a pained voice as he try’s to lay down

taking your hands off his wound you take a better look at it seeing that it‘s not that deep so it didn’t damage any organs

opening your bag full of medical stuff preparing to stitch him up, handing him a towel to bite on

„you know the drill i will numb the area but you still gonna feel pain“

you hear him snuck in a breath every time the needle goes through it „just 3 more times okay hang on and don’t close your eyes or i will haunt you“

making him chuckle silently

putting a bandage on it and done.

you take a deep breath brushing your hair back and looking at Jungwon who’s already looking at you with gratitude-

„i will definitely get more wrinkles from all the stress.. - you’re pretty dirty shall i help you wash up?“

nodding at you, and helping him getting freshen up.

you wait outside for him to change into different clothes and prepare the bed

hearing the bathroom door swung open you turn around seeing him in sweatpants and a tanktop

„thank you love“

„no problem just promise me to let your doctors do their thing when its gonna happen again which i hope the fuck not but still..“

„can‘t promise“

„jungwon-

„i wouldn’t trust any other doctor besides my lovely girlfriend who is a doctor herself“

turning back around, a slight pinkish taint on your cheeks feeling a bit flustered „you‘re annoying“ you mutter

you feel arms wrapping around your waist pressing you to his chest his face on your neck tracing it with his nose and leaving butterfly kisses along it, making you melt into his arms

„i’m sorry for making you worry princess, i didn’t thought the mission would escalate like that, and you know you‘re the only person i want to see after such disaster“

„it’s okay and i know, i mean it wasn’t the first time but i for sure hope the last- turning around and giving him a stern look

„-got the person who stabbed you atleast his punishment?“

„the next second after he did that, don’t think about it“

leaning a bit down and tucking your hair behind your ear, whispering against your lips „i love you“ making you peck hip lips muttering a i love you back.

„well can we now got to bed, your assistant woke me up in the middle of a dream“ you turn around ready to jump into the cozy duvet

him smacking your butt „i for sure hope it was about me"

1 year ago

why am i crying i hate y'all

Bad Day - Bang Chan Drabble

Summary: Reader has a terrible day; one of those days where everything goes wrong. Luckily, her boyfriend is there to wipe the stress away with some well deserved hugs.

Word Count: 2.2k

——————————————————

Punch after punch after punch after punch lands on your soul today. Every single time you turned around, another horrible situation would present itself.

You’ve been sick for two and half weeks now. The sore throat would come and go, but you weren’t able to sleep without propping two pillows under your head. This morning when you woke up, your voice was completely gone.

The empty space next to you in bed certainly doesn’t help either. Chan has been gone for a work trip for two weeks now. He wasn’t due home for another two more.

Work has been its own animal to take care of. It was your first job after graduating, so you were at the bottom of the totem pole. Each higher up suddenly felt the need to burden you with any difficult projects they didn’t feel like taking care of themselves.

“I don’t think this is something I was trained on,” you tried to say to one of the more older workers. The huge stack of papers was so heavy in your hands. “These calculations would take me—“

“Just do it, Y/N,” he said before closing the door to the conference room you were standing alone in.

You had just watched that coworker’s boss tell him to do it. But nope, he dumped it on you.

On top of that, you were also tasked with training the new guy even though you’ve only been here for nine months.

And this guy made it his personal mission to make your job even harder. The way he would go from not knowing anything to being a complete know-it-all within two sentences made your blood boil.

But it’s fine. It’s totally fine, you can handle this.

Then, someone ate your lunch out of the fridge even though your name was clearly written on it. Your lunch break was so short that there was no way you could run out to get something else.

It was raining so hard as you jogged to your car through the parking lot. Every spot in the parking garage was taken this morning so you had to use the satellite lot ten minutes away.

Your clothes were drenched by the time you got into your car and slammed the door shut.

Fumbling with the keys, you shoved them into the ignition and started your car. The heat immediately kicked on and you sat there for an extra couple of minutes, warming your frozen fingers in front of the vents.

A book from one of your favorite authors came out today. You were going to pass the store on your way home, why not stop and buy a copy? It certainly would help with the day you were having.

The drive to the store was silent. You didn’t even turn the radio on. If you’re being honest, you didn’t think you could handle sound.

People were everywhere in the bookstore.

You walked in and looked around for the new book. There were signs and posters everywhere that announced the book. Where was it?

“If you’re looking for the new Kingdom book we sold out this morning.” A worker says to you softly.

A small part of you dies.

You politely nod to the worker and leave.

It’s ridiculous how you feel the tears building behind your eyes.

It’s fine. It’s fine. You’re overreacting. It’s totally fine. You’ll just buy a copy on your Kindle. You didn’t even need a physical copy, right?

Your fingers fumble with your keys and you drop onto the ground. They splash right into a puddle.

It’s fine, it’s fine.

Swallowing painfully, you wince at your sore throat and gather your things to get back in the car.

You’ll go home and watch TV.

“It’s Friday,” you whisper to yourself in the car to try and calm down. “It’s treat day, why not stop for a coffee?”

Every Friday you would buy yourself a coffee. ‘Treat Day’ is what you dubbed it as. It slowly became a tradition with you and your friends.

Chan used to always reload your coffee rewards app with his own money without telling you.

A sad smile tugs at your face while you drive to the coffee shop. God, what you wouldn’t give to see him right now.

The tension in your shoulders is so bad you think your shoulders are level with your ears.

After getting your coffee, you drive all the way home to your apartment complex.

Right before you turn into the lot, a car decides to come out of nowhere and cuts you off. You cut the wheel and slam on the brakes to avoid them.

Your coffee launches out of the cup holder and spills all over your lap.

“Fuck!” You curse and try to focus on the road. “Fuck fuck!”

At least it was iced coffee and you’re not burned. Right? Silver lining?

You’re at your limit. Your sanity is teetering.

Parking in your designated spot, you trudge into the large building.

The weight of the day still sits so heavy on your shoulders. Now your lap was soaked with coffee.

A package sits underneath the complex’s mailboxes. It’s ruined and crushed. The ‘FRAGILE’ sticker is gnarled up.

“No,” you sigh and look closer at it.

Yep, it’s yours. The new dishwear set you ordered came in.

When you lift the package you hear all the pieces shift around. It’s just a box of broken ceramic at this point.

Tighter and tighter your throat gets.

Slowly, you trudge up to your floor. Because, of course, the elevator is broken. Of course it is. Why would the elevator work today?

Just as you get your keys out to open your door, your shitty neighbor comes outside.

“Oh god, Y/N, you look horrible.” He says loudly.

You turn and look at him with tears already brimming in your eyes.

No sign of compassion crosses his face, instead, he laughs. He laughs right in your fucking face.

“No wonder I haven’t seen Chan around. He finally came to his senses, eh?”

Your jaw drops open.

“God, pull yourself together.”

Your neighbor picks up his newspaper from the doormat and goes back into his unit without another word.

For a long moment, you just stand there. Your clothes and hair still soaking wet and clinging to your skin, work bag and purse slung over your shoulder, box of broken plates and bowls in your arms.

Inside your body, you felt yourself finally snap. You felt your anger and frustration hit it’s limit.

Your look of surprise quickly morphs into one of seething rage. Lips pulling in a sneer, you rip open your door and stomp inside, slamming it shut behind you.

Dropping everything you own at the door, including the box of glass, you let out a muffled scream.

The box bursts open and glass shards go everywhere. They skitter across the floor and cover the wood in a dangerous mine field.

A moment of silence passes.

You lose it.

You drop to your knees and cradle your face while angry, hot tears stream down your cheeks.

Wails leave your lips as the weight of the day finally takes it’s toll.

On any normal day, you would be able to handle these things individually, but all at once? You just couldn’t deal with it anymore.

“Y/N?!” A voice calls out from the other end of the hallway.

Your head snaps up and you see your boyfriend standing there with a look of horror on his face.

“Chan,” you croak out.

His eyes frantically look around at the scene in front of him. Your disgruntled state surrounded by broken glass.

He’s here? He’s back?

“Y/N, are you okay? What happened? Are you hurt?”

He tries to walk closer but then he realizes he’s also surrounded by broken glass.

“Chan.” Is all your able to say again before the sobs come out even harder. Your entire body wracks with them, chest sputtering as you try to breathe between cries.

His face twists up in anguish.

“S-Stay there! Don’t move, I’m gunna get a dust pan, okay? I’ll be right back, babygirl. Don’t move.”

He continues to say things over and over to you while running to get what he needs.

“I’m here, baby. You’re okay, right? You’re home and safe, Y/N.”

You bury your face in your hands again and continue to cry. His words reach you, but they do nothing to quell the emotions.

Before you could fall further into this headspace, two warm, strong arms wrap around you and pull you into an even warmer body.

“I’m right here, honey, I’m here. You’re okay.” Chan whispers into your hair. He pulls you onto his lap and holds you close.

His comforting scent envelops you everywhere.

Chan rocks back and forth while holding you.

“You’re okay,” he says over and over into your hair. “You’re home now, I’m here, Channie’s here.”

Your face buried into his shoulder, hands gripping his shirt tightly

“What happened, baby?” He asks gently.

You cry harder.

“I’m so sick,” you cry into his shirt. “People keep taking advantage of me at work, I had to park ten minutes away in the rain. Someone ate my lunch. I dropped my keys in a puddle, the new book sold out, I spilled my coffee everywhere. Then fucking 304 across the hall tells me how horrible I look.”

You motion outwards at the glass all over the floor still. “And how do you like our new dishes?”

Even in the middle of a mental breakdown, you still crack a joke.

Saying it all makes you cry even harder. At this point, Chan’s shirt is soaked with your tears.

He continues to hold you as tight as he could. Not once does he tell you to stop crying, instead he carefully scoots and leans against the wall, cradling your body on his lap.

Chan rocks back and forth, pressing kisses into the crown of your hair as you cry your heart out.

His one hand rubs slow circles on your back while the other pets the back of your hair.

Low hums come from his throat. Chan lays his cheek on top of your head and keeps you close to his chest.

“It’s okay, babygirl,” he coos. “You’re home now. You’re with me now.”

“Thank god you’re home,” you hiccup and clutch his shirt closer to you.

“My spidey-senses were tingling,” he jokes in a hushed tone.

You manage to chuckle through your tears.

“My babygirl needed me.”

You’ve always been so happy go lucky, the glass was always half full with you. You always looked on the bright side of everything. If anything bad happened, it always just rolled off your back.

It was one of the main reasons he fell for you.

Chan has never seen you as bad as you were on your knees in the entryway, it shook him to his core.

Another long kiss is pressed to your head.

Slowly, your sobs calm down. Your throat still hoarse and sore from before has only gotten marginally worse.

Sniffling, you sit up away from Chan.

“‘M sorry I got your shirt all gross.”

Chan laughs in spite of everything. Both of his strong hands cup your cheeks for you to look him in the eye.

His chin dips down to your level so he can stare right at you. Those gorgeous brown eyes sparkle at you.

“I’m not upset about my shirt, Y/N,” he says gently. “I’m only worried about my sunshine. It’s not every day you cry, baby.”

“Everything just happened at once.” Chan’s thumbs wipe away the tears on your cheeks. “I tried to keep it together but our neighbor verbally berating me was the straw that broke the camel’s back.”

Chan tuts and brushes your hair behind your ear.

“Let’s throw eggs at his door,” he jokes.

He pulls a laugh from you.

“There’s my favorite smile.” He coos. It makes your smile even brighter. You sniffle again, and look down sheepishly.

Chan lifts your chin up with his thumb and forefinger. “Hey baby,” he grabs your attention. “How about this: you go shower off the day, I’m going to clean all this up and order our favorite takeout for dinner. I even stopped on my way home and got two pints of ice cream before.”

“Mint chocolate chip?” You ask softly.

“Of course I got your nasty toothpaste ice cream.” He pinches your cheek teasingly.

You giggle and lean away from his hand.

“Come on, babygirl.”

Before he does anything else, Chan leans forward and presses a long, warm kiss to your forehead.

Both of your eyes close at the comforting feeling it brings. After he kisses your forehead, Chan leans down and kisses both of your cheeks.

His warm lips then press to your nose and then finally to your lips.

It’s a long, sensual, loving kiss. Both of your mouths slipping over one another in a dance.

You sigh happily into the kiss. Chan’s mouth smiles against your own. It’s contagious, you can’t help but mirror the grin with our own.

In the end, you both look like smiling fools wrapped up in one another’s presence.

Chan scoops you up carefully and stands up from the floor, making sure to avoid any stray shards of glass.

“I’m going to take good care of you, my honey.” He coos and presses another kiss to your forehead. “Your bad day ends here.”

1 year ago

<33

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

╱ ❛   𝖶𝖧𝖠𝖳 𝖨𝖲 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝖳𝖮 𝖬𝖤? … 𝖳𝖧𝖤 𝖠𝖭𝖲𝖶𝖤𝖱

𝖨𝖲 𝖠𝖫𝖶𝖠𝖸𝖲 𝗢𝗡𝗟𝗬 𝗬𝗢𝗨 ❜ ╲

˚   ★₊˚﹟💐'     ,     .

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

﹙  context. SET DURiNG ‘ORANGE BLOOD’ ERA ; SEE MiLA iN ‘ORANGE BLOOD’ TRAiLER﹚

 ' ˚. ✦ ˑ ִֶ ┆ now playing … ❝ 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 ❞

━━ 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝖺𝗆𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝗎𝗇 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗋𝗂𝗌𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗌𝖾𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝗈𝗈𝗇 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗐𝖺𝗑 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝖾, 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 𝗇𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝖼𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾.

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

𖥔 ݁ ˖ ˚ . ┃ SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGED. Mila would dare say that the boys were one such thing — and so was she. Not in the sense that they were stagnant, but in the sense that their hearts were steady in their passion, their kindness, and their unfaltering love. One year, two years, three years going on to four… And after all this time, they were still them.

So it was no surprise that Mila could accurately predict their reaction to her role in the trailer for their new comeback.

The board meeting for ‘Orange Blood’ was one that Mila looked forward to as much as she did any meeting discussing the future of the group. Though their schedules were busy with their upcoming Fate Tour, there was no denying the anticipation of releasing new songs, and the relief of knowing they were still very much in the race. (She considered herself fortunate that they weren’t one of the mistreated artists she’d often heard of, whose comebacks ranged around once a year — if at all.)

The concept was an unexpectedly bright and hopeful one compared to ‘Dark Blood’. Or perhaps, ‘nostalgic’ was the better word — yes, indeed, nostalgia was a perfect word for the concept. And all members of Enhypen were pleased with the proposed title track, B-sides (including Mila and Kiara’s subunit song, ‘Sweet Juice’), and overall aesthetic of the new album. It seemed as if it would be a carefree and fun era free of the drama of its predecessor.

Except, of course, that wasn’t exactly the case.

When the time came for the discussion of the concept trailer, the air of nostalgia surrounding ‘Orange Blood’ instead became replaced by déjà vu.

“Mila has a special part to play,” the director of the concept trailer said. “If you remember from the ‘Dark Blood’ trailer, she was the only one of you nine who survived everything.”

“Right!” Sunoo exclaimed excitedly. “It was one of the things all the Engenes kept making theories about.”

Mila smiled. Amidst all the drama of her jealousy for Sunghoon, Jay and the boys’ interactions with Park Jiwon, she didn’t give much attention to her own role as she should have. But it was still a very intriguing point in the concept trailer for all who watched it.

The director nodded. “That goes to say that means she won’t be with the rest of you for the majority of the trailer.”

A wave of surprise washed over the Enhypen members. Their eyes widened collectively, giving the impression of nine bewildered children who had just learnt Santa wasn’t real.

“And before you ask— yes, she’s still going to be in the trailer. She’ll just have different scenes from everyone else.” Mila smiled when the tension in the others’ shoulders relaxed. She knew they would be the first to jump to her defence if, for some reason, she was excluded.

“After being separated, their paths are obviously going different ways. While Mila is still unaware, you boys and Kiara will be reincarnated as humans…”

The director began to explain the first part of the trailer, which consisted of the boys being taken out of the ocean by Jiwon, followed by the next couple of scenes. Mila became sceptical at one particular scene involving Sunoo’s neck being bitten, but figured it wouldn’t be anything new — after all, Jay had his neck bitten in the trailer for ‘Dark Blood’. (She didn’t want to admit she was a little bothered by it… though she would ignore that feeling for now.)

Then it came to the part where Mila would make her appearance.

“Now, after all this, we finally see what Mila has been up to this entire time. And since she no longer has her friends with her, she is living a pretty lonely life.”

The others made noises of sympathy.

“…But then she finds a handsome young man who falls in love with her, and they live happily with each other as a seemingly loving couple—”

The sound of Kiara choking on her water echoed through the now silent room.

“What’s wrong?” The director asked cluelessly as he observed the group’s reactions. He blinked when he received no response. “Was it something I said?”

Kiara was alternating between laughing, struggling to swallow her water, and shaking her head in denial. Mila supposed it was good that at least one of them seemed amused by the situation — because the other eight of them were certainly not.

Sunghoon — who had been lost in his own daydream the whole time as he stared at a random spot on the table in front of him — suddenly snapped his head towards the director, eyebrows raised and eyes wide as if he had heard something incredibly offensive.

Sunoo’s jaw dropped in a slacked ‘oh’, while he side-eyed Mila beside him, and then slowly looked back towards the director, looking a lot like he did in his iconic reaction towards Seon in the first episode of I-Land.

Jungwon, whose eyes looked devoid of all life, said, “No… Not at all. Please — do go on.”

If his words could convince anyone that he was fine, they would have to be both blind and deaf— because anyone could hear the soulless conviction he spoke with, or the obviously forced smile on his face. 

Mila glanced at him before smiling at the director and drawing his attention to her. “So, I’m guessing my scenes will be with the actor then?”

The director cleared his throat. “Well, like I was saying — Mila, you’re looking for love to fill the gap left behind by seeing the others die, and you decide to court this young man as a way of moving on. So your scenes together will be pretty romantic.”

Mila blinked. “I see…”

That was probably the last thing the boys wanted to hear. And honestly, she didn’t feel too comfortable with the idea of acting romantically with another male, even if it was for work. It was awkward to try and replicate the chemistry of two lovers with someone that wasn’t the boys — let alone someone she hadn’t met.

Heeseung had visibly tensed, before rolling his shoulders to avoid seeming too affected. However, the way he pursed his lips and sat forward in his seat gave him away.

Jake’s eyebrows raised as he licked the inside of his cheek, fidgeting nervously by cracking his knuckles while he declined back in his chair. He didn’t take his eyes, instead staring at the sheet of paper in front of him.

Jay hadn’t said or done anything of note, but the set in his jaw and the subtle flex of his hand ok the table served as enough of a sign.

At that moment, Mila felt a hand on her knee, and looked beside her to see Riki with a carefully stoic expression. The only sign that he was bothered was the gentle squeeze he gave her.

Mila discretely reached out under the table to squeeze his hand reassuringly.

Looking for a way to comfort them, she asked, “But we won’t be overly touchy, will we? I mean — we won’t be kissing or anything.”

The director laughed, as if Mila had told him a funny joke. “Of course not! We’d never ask you to do such a thing.”

The boys took this as a good sign, and the air around them immediately became more relaxed. Mila smiled. She thought that would be the end of it until the director continued.

“You’ll just be very close to each other, instead — oh, and you might have to bite his neck.”

Mila, the boys, Kiara, and the manager who had just bought in coffee for the nine of them fell quiet. No one said a word as the director beamed innocently. They were too stunned to speak.

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

“I’M SURE IT WON’T BE THAT BAD.”

Mila didn’t know who she was trying to convince, but it didn’t seem like it worked on any of the boys — or herself, for that matter. As soon as they had gotten back to the dorms from the meeting, the boys were spread across the living room with silly expressions. (Kiara had, as usual, disappeared to visit the TXT dorms as soon as she could.)

“It will be just like you and Jiwon in the ‘Dark Blood’ trailer,” Mila said, “It’s all professional.”

“But you still got jealous,” Sunoo pointed out.

Mila scrunched her nose. “You really had to bring that back up…”

Heeseung laughed and pinched her cheek. “Don’t mind us, we’re just jealous that you get to act all romantic with someone else. But at the end of the day, we know it’s part of our job. We’ll be okay.”

Jake laughed. “This kinda feels familiar, doesn’t it?”

There was a silent agreement among everyone. Some things really didn’t change…

“Anyway, it doesn’t really make sense for us to mope about it when nothing has happened yet,” Jungwon claimed. “I don’t know about you, but I just wanna appreciate now first.” With that, the leader stood up and held his arms out towards Mila. “Come here.”

Mila giggled and launched herself into his arms. The younger immediately wrapped his arms around her and rested his cheek against the top of her head, inhaling her scent. He closed his eyes and the other members chuckled around them.

“Hey, don’t forget me!” Jake said, before adding himself to the hug.

The others followed soon after, crowding around together in the middle of the living room. 

“To be honest, I think I’d rather not be there to watch you film,” Jay said quietly. The first day of Mila’s filming happened to be the last day of filming for the boys, so they would all be on set with her when she would be filming with the actor. “I don’t think I’d be able to control my emotions…”

Mila hummed. “I get it. You can’t help it. But at the end of the day, I’m always only yours.” She smiled slyly. “And if you ever feel like reminding, you can always try and sneak a kiss on set.”

“Ayyyyy,” the boys chorused. 

Sunghoon chuckled and patted the top of her head. “That’s my girl.”

“You mean ‘our’ girl, right?” Sunoo asked with a raised eyebrow. Everyone laughed, causing Sunoo to smile. With a smug expression, he said, “Well, just for the record— I’m the only one here who gets to film a scene with Mimi. And we get to hug.”

“That’s not fair!” Riki whined. “Why do you only get to film a scene with her?”

Sunoo shrugged sassily. “I guess we’re just destined to be together.”

“Then what about the rest of us?” Jay asked with a raised eyebrow.

“You tell me,” Sunoo said. “I was her first boyfriend and her first kiss, you know. You guys were just add-ons to our relationship.”

“What are you saying?!” Riki exclaimed. “I was the closest to her during I-Land. All of you tried to vote her out of I-Land in the first elimination.”

“I didn’t!” Sunghoon protested with a raised hand. “I liked her better than all of you.”

“Yeah, well, me and Mila were like—!” (Jake crossed his index and middle finger.) “—THIS!”

Heeseung crossed his arms over his chest. “Well, I was her first love. So technically, I beat all of you.”

“Are you sure you want to bring THAT up, Hyung?” Jungwon asked the older male with a glint in his eyes. “You know how that went down…”

The others gasped in shock at the young leader’s bold attack. Mila laughed, watching the way Sunoo dramatically put both hands over his mouth with wide eyes.

As bickering started to ensue between the members, Mila shook her head in fond exasperation. She didn’t say anything as they made shots at each other, instead choosing to enjoy watching their bonding moment. 

There was something beautiful about these little moments they shared together. The moments that — while fleeting, and easily faded from memory — showed just how well they melded together. How much they belonged.

And she wished more than anything that they would be just as they always had. That this thing they had would never change.

Mila smiled as she rested her chin on her hand. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Later on that night, Kiara — who had been asked for lyrical input for one of the side tracks of the album — had thought to ask Mila for some ideas. She would be one of the few people who knew just how profound the younger female’s thoughts could be, even on the smallest of topics.

“What do you think about the saying, ‘Some things never change?” Kiara had asked.

“I think even though humans change, there are some things they are so connected to that they can’t do things any differently,” Mila said to her.

Ironically enough, Mila’s sentiment was the exact antithesis of the ephemerality romanticised in ‘Orange Blood’. There was no guessing what Mila could be thinking — she always managed to surprise people with her unpredictability. But it was for that reason that Kiara admired her mind so much.

“For example, you and Yeonjunnie-oppa love each other a lot, right? And whether it’s today or tomorrow, if there’s ever a time where you’re not together, you’ll still miss each other. No matter how many times you do it, it doesn’t hurt any less. And as long as you guys love each other, nothing will change, because your reactions and emotions come from the same place each and every time — in this case, your feelings for each other.”

Kiara blinked. She stared for a few seconds before she broke out of her awed state and started nodding.

“Okay… Damn.” She lowered her head as she stared at the paper in front of her, on which she had scribbled notes onto for inspiration. “I like that… I like that a lot.”

Mila beamed. “Is that enough to help you out? Or do you want some more to go off?”

Kiara looked at the younger female with a glint in her eye. Mila tilted her head in confusion, as Kiara smiled — the type one would give their student when they accomplished something significant in their studies.

“How about this?” Kiara asked. “I think you have a better grasp of this than me — so what about you write down lyrics for this that you can pitch to the PD? I don’t think I resonate with this song as much as you do, so it’s for the best. And I feel like you have a lot of good ideas for it.”

Mila furrowed her eyebrows. “But I’ve never written lyrics before… And what if he doesn’t like them?” Mila shook her head. “It would be better if you wrote them.”

Kiara kissed her teeth. “Yah. Aren’t you the one who always says to Engenes that there’s no harm in trying? If you don’t have anything, that’s fine. I’ll just hand in something. But if you do, then why not share it? I’m just saying, it’s not like you to throw away a chance before trying.”

Mila couldn’t deny the logic of Kiara’s words. She would be a hypocrite if she didn’t the didn’t do as she always said — and that wasn’t a standard she wanted to hold herself to. She nodded.

“Fine,” she said with a determined smile. “I’ll give it a try… Just don’t expect too much, okay?“

Kiara laughed. “Okay, okay.”

As she stared at the computer in front of Kiara, where the demo of the track was playing, Mila found her eyes settling on the title, letting it ingrain itself into her brain like a tattoo.

‘Still Monster’, huh?

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

IT WAS LATE IN THE NIGHT.

Mila found herself at the kitchen table, eating a snack as she scribbled mindlessly on the notepad in front of her. She had her AirPods in, repeatedly playing the demo of ‘Still Monster’ as she wrote whatever came to mind. It had been a day since she was given the task of writing some lyrics for ‘Still Monster’, and ideas flooded her brain like a river — the struggle, however, was finding a way to express them all.

“Noona?” Mila looked up from her notepad for the first time in the past few minutes to see Riki standing there, half-asleep as he rubbed at his eyes sleepily. “What are you doing?”

Mila smiled, internally cooing at how adorable he looked. “I’m just writing something…”

Riki tilted his head curiously. He slowly padded his way over to the table and pulled out a seat next to Mila. Mila watched as he rested his head on her shoulder, while groggily reading the contents of Mila’s notepad.

“‘Still Monster’? That’s one of our tracks, isn’t it?” Riki asked.

Mila hummed. She hadn’t told the boys about it yet because she didn’t want to disappoint them if the pitching didn’t go well, so she decided to keep it to herself until she received good feedback.

But Riki had always been someone she let her guard down with. It was one of the reasons she called him her ‘Peter Pan’: if she was Wendy, he was the one around whom she could always be carefree. As much as they bickered, as much as they fought, as long as it was him, she knew she didn’t have to fear being judged.

“I’m writing some lyrics for it.” She sighed. “But as you can see it’s not really going anywhere at the moment.”

There was a few seconds of silence, before Riki suddenly shot up in his seat. “You’re writing a song?!” he asked, his eyes wide with awe. “That’s amazing!”

Mila laughed as she brushed his hair away from his face. “Thank you… But like I said, it’s not really going anywhere at the moment. I have ideas — I just don’t know how to put them into words.”

Riki tilted his head. “Why not? You’re usually good at talking.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Mila narrowed her eyes playfully. “Are you saying I’m too talkative?”

Riki shook his head vigorously. “No, it’s not that… I just mean, you always know what to say.” Riki lowered his head, once again resting it on Mila’s shoulder. The strands of his hair tickled her neck, causing her to giggle when he nuzzled his cheek against her. “Remember during I-Land, when I was feeling down after I kept losing battles?”

Mila hummed and nodded. Those days weren’t ones he often reminisced on, but she knew they stuck with them even today — because how could it not? All of them, in some way, were affected by the wreck that was I-Land. Even if they didn’t show it. And for Mila and Riki — who had left everything behind to move to a foreign country where nothing was guaranteed — that trauma only increased twofold.

When the two of them were in Ground, losing chance after chance to go back into I-Land, they had finally reached their breaking point. And by the time the last test of Part One had begun to air, they had to do everything in their power to make sure they would be debuting.

“Do you remember what you said to me when I told you I didn’t think I was good enough?” Riki let out a small chuckle. His hand made its way to Mila’s, his fingers intertwining with hers like two pieces of a puzzle. “You said that people who always see ways to improve will never stop getting better. So, I was good enough — but part of me knew I was meant to be so much more.”

Mila let a smile break through. “That was such a long time ago… You still remember that?”

Riki nodded. “Of course,” he said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “I was so close to giving up, but as soon as you said that I realised I didn’t want to stop there.” He sighed as he breathed in Mila’s comforting scent. “You always said the right thing to make me feel better when I was sad… It didn’t matter if your Korean was still kinda bad—”

“Yah!” Mila let out a strangled laugh in her surprise, slapping Riki’s shoulder indignantly.

Riki laughed, before catching Mila’s hand in his own and placing a soft kiss on the back of it as an apology. “I’m just saying — it’s the message that I remember the most, not the words.”

Mila blinked. “That… actually makes a lot of sense.” She looked down at Riki with feigned shock. “When did you become so smart?”

Riki scoffed. “You didn’t even know how to order anything other than jjajangmyeon from restaurants until I taught you — and you’ve been living in Korea for longer than I have.”

Mila gasped. But before Mila could say anything, Riki looked up at her through his lashes. His eyes were like pools of pure water, containing nothing but clear international and sincerity. Mila faltered, watching the way his eyes held hers, the space between them both too far and too close for her heart to handle.

“Just write whatever comes to you. If it’s from you, there’s no way it won’t be beautiful.”

Mila smiled. And without another second wasted, she pressed her lips to his.

That night, the lyrics came as effortlessly to her as breathing. And at the centre of it all was them — the ones who, like the stars in the night sky, brought the light into her otherwise pitch black night.

“These lyrics are really good!” The producer praised as he looked over the final draft that Mila presented to them. “We’ll change some of it to fit the vampire concept — but otherwise it’s perfect.” The producer smiled. “I didn’t know you were this good at writing lyrics.”

Mila smiled. “Thank you… But I had help.”

I owe Riki some bunggeoppang.

The producer shook his head with a chuckle. “Regardless, this is a very good result. If you keep up the good work, you could even be doing songwriting on the side. Good work.”

Mila smiled sheepishly at the praise. 

“We’ll make sure to add your name to the credits. After some tweaking, it should be ready for the boys to record the vocals.”

Mila nodded. Since it was a subunit song for the boys — the same way Mila and Kiara had their own subunit — she unfortunately wouldn’t be able to be able to sing it herself. But somehow, Mila didn’t mind it so much. After all, there was something about the boys singing a song that she wrote for them that made her feel giddy inside. The fact that she also asked Riki to keep quiet (in case the feedback wasn’t good) also meant it would be a surprise to them.

She hummed as she left the producer’s office, looking like a giddy high school girl as she walked through the halls, greeting staff with a smile.

Mila couldn’t wait to see the boys’ reaction when they found out. Maybe she would even play a little prank on them, and wait until after everything to reveal the secret…

Mila giggled mischeviously. She was just full of good ideas, wasn’t she?

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

THE FIRST DAY OF MILA’S FILMING FINALLY CAME, and it couldn’t have been any sooner. The past few days, she had to watch the boys leave without her to go filming, and she had become the personification of a drowned puppy as a result.

Enhypen had already finished recording the singles for the album and the choreography, so the next step was to film the concept trailer. Since she was the only one who didn’t have a role in the first few days of filming, she would stay behind for them — something which she obviously didn’t take well to. The whole time while the boys were preparing to leave, she would follow them around the house with a cloud of gloom hovering over her head.

“Has anyone seen my charger?” Jay asked, while searching through his things.

Mila pouted from behind him and raised a finger to point to the door. “It’s in the living room, on the coffee table.”

“Ah— thanks, Angel.” Jay patted her on the head and left the room to find his charger. Mila sighed and trailed behind him, tugging on the ends of her (or rather, Sunghoon’s) shirt. When Jay found his charger, he packed it in his bag and put his hands on his hips. “Okay, that’s all for me. I’m done now.”

“Same here!” Jake replied as he slung his bag over his shoulder and placed a cap on his head.

Mila continued to sulk silently as the boys announced their readiness one by one. And when they got ready to leave the dorm, she stood at the door, giving each of them a hug before they walked out.

“See you later,” she said sadly as she wrapped her arms around Sunoo’s waist. “Love you…”

Sunoo laughed as he returned her hug, the sound like chiming bells with its gentle tone. He gently stroked the back of her head while pressing his lips to her forehead. And with a caress of her cheek, he pulled away while smiling, eyes dripping with honey.

“Love you too, Byeol-ah. Don’t miss us too much, okay? We’ll be back before you know it.”

“That’s right.” Jungwon latched onto Mila’s waist in a side hug. He rested his cheek against her shoulder and closed his eyes as Mila reached up to pay his head. “We’ll bring snacks with us.”

Mila nodded weakly, sparing a small smile. “Okay…”

Heeseung pressed a firm kiss against her cheek, making a slight smacking noise as he parted. “Love you saurrrr much.”

With that, Mila burst out into laughter.

The other boys gave her sweet goodbye kisses as they walked out the door, before eventually Mila was left alone. And the only thing she could say was sigh and trudge her way to her bed, where she would lie down scrolling through social media to see Engenes’ reactions to her new red hair.

And that process continued until today, the final day of the boys’ and Kiara’s filming, before Mila would film her parts, along with her scene with Sunoo. Since they were relatively simple scenes, they would be able to finish in one day. (According to the director, that was.)

They look like they’re having fun…

Mila smiled as she watched Kiara and the boys running through the field of flowers. Since all the scenes with Sooha were already shot, Park Jiwon wasn’t on the set today, so Mila didn’t get the chance to greet her.

Mila wouldn’t admit that she still thought a lot about the potential bite scene between Jiwon and Sunoo after reading over the script so many times. But in the end, the girl had proven to be very hardworking and talented. It was hard not to like her.

That’s too bad, Mila thought. Maybe next time.

With that Mila smiled and continued to get ready with the help of her staff.

Mila had just finished changing into her dress — a long, white number with spaghetti straps — when she ran into the assistant director, who was standing with someone she had never met before. He was tall and handsome, as well as rather young (he didn’t look much older than herself), and was standing before a makeup artist who seemed to be placing finishing touches on his face.

Mila immediately connected the dots and realised that he was, in fact, the actor she would be partnered with for the trailer.

“Ah, Mila!” The assistant director smiled when he took note of Mila standing there. Mila bowed as he ushered her to come closer. “Just the girl I was looking for! Come here for a second!”

Mila hiked up her skirt and made her way over. By now, the actor finished having his makeup done and made eye contact with Mila when he turned around. The two subconsciously bowed their heads in greeting, while the assistant director smiled and nodded in approval.

“You wanted to see me?” Mila asked.

The assistant said, “That’s right. I wanted to introduce you.” He gestured to the younger man beside him. “This is Park Hajoon, he’s been a model and actor under Hybe for the past two years. He’ll be your partner for today. Hajoon, you know Mila already. Greet your senior.”

Hajoon bowed to show respect before smiling widely. “Nice to meet you, Sunbaenim. I’ve been a big fan of yours since I-Land. I’m looking forward to today.”

Mila flashed a friendly smile. “Oh, really? Nice to meet you too; I’m lucky to have such a dedicated fan. Let’s work hard together, okay?”

Hajoon beamed enthusiastically, his eyes lit up in clear admiration. Mila lowered her head, avoiding looking into his eyes. She couldn’t help but feel bashful — every time she met a fan who looked at her with the same respect that Hajoon did, she never really knew how to react.

The assistant director chuckled and pat the younger male on the shoulder. “Well, since you’re familiar now, why don’t you two start discussing your scene together while the others wrap up their final scene?”

Mila nodded. “Okay, sounds good to me.” She turned to Hajoon with a smile and gestured to the tent not far away. “Shall we?”

“Yes, Sunbaenim!” he responded passionately.

Mila laughed. If he kept up the energy for the entirety of the shoot, he would be able to rival Mila for the title of the set moodmaker. And she couldn’t have that, could she?

“Let’s go!” Mila exclaimed equally as enthusiastically.

With that, the two laughed and walked away. They arrived at the tent, where the staff had already set chairs out for Mila and the rest of the group to rest in when the others were done with their shoot. But Mila and Hajoon would be leaving as soon as they were finished to head towards a cottage not far from where they currently had their equipment set up.

“How much experience do you have with acting?” Mila asked as she read through the script.

“I’ve had small roles in web dramas before,” he replied.

Mila ‘ooh’ed. “That’s impressive.” Hajoon lowered his head and sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. “In that case, we should be done in under three takes, right?”

Mila said it as a joke. She definitely wasn’t expecting Hajoon to suddenly get all fired up, eyes burning with determination as he held up a fist. “Respectfully, Sunbaenim — but I believe we can do it one!”

Mila’s eyes widened. He really was a bold one, wasn’t he? But that wasn’t a bad thing — not at all. She admired that sort of confidence more than anything. So, at that moment she knew she had gotten lucky with her partner.

“I like it! Okay, let’s aim for one take then!” she said with a smile. Mila then put the script on the table between them and pointed to an outlined scene, where Hajoon would be standing over Mila as she awoke from a nightmare. “For this scene here, I was thinking….”

And just like that, the two became absorbed in their work.

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

“IS THAT THE GUY?”

The remaining members of Enhypen had just finished filming their final scene together for the trailer and were heading back to the tent while the staff prepared the equipment for moving. They had originally been in high springs, considering they finally finished — but some certain members were immediately cast into a bitter mood as they spotted Mila waiting for them under the tent with an unfamiliar male.

The two of them were peering over paper together, their heads almost touching as they conversed with each other, unaware of the eyes on them.

Sunghoon was the first to propose who the unknown male was. Immediately, the others followed with dejected realisation that he was in fact the man who would be filming very romantic scenes with their girlfriend.

Jungwon pouted as he continued to walk towards them. “Come on,” he said to the others. “We should greet him.”

Regardless of their own feelings, the man hadn’t done anything wrong, so there was no reason to host any animosity toward him. Not to mention, when the positions were switched during the ‘Dark Blood’ trailer, Mila was also expected to be polite with Jiwon, even knowing that the latter would be biting Jay’s neck and very nearly sharing a kiss with Sunghoon.

“Now I know why Mila was so bitter about the ‘Dark Blood’ trailer,” Jake said as he watched Mila and her partner look at each other.

The latter lifted a hand as if to brush a strand of hair out of his face. Logically, Jake already knew it was to practise a scene in the script. But it still irked him nonetheless when he watched the unnamed actor tenderly stroke Mila’s hair, the way he often did.

Jay clenched his jaw. “He’s barely done anything, and I already feel defensive.”

“Why don’t you guys smile a little?” Kiara said with an amused smile. “You can’t scare the poor boy away.”

“Why not?” Heeseung immediately replied. With his doe eyes, one would think he was genuinely asking — though his co-members knew better.

Kiara rolled her eyes in exasperation. “You guys…”

At that moment, as if sensing them approaching, Mila looked up from the script she was sharing with her partner. The boys could practically picture bunny ears standing to attention on the top of her head. Her eyes brightened in recognition and a wide smile crossed her face as she waved enthusiastically.

The boys immediately fixed smiles on their faces, not wanting to worry Mila with their feelings when she was preparing for work. They joined both her and her partner under the tent, causing them both to stand to their feet.

“Congrats on finishing!” Mila applauded the boys with genuine pride. “I was watching you before — you did good. I think the shots will come out nicely.”

The boys become visibly lightened at the praise. 

Heeseung reached out and patted Mila’s head, smiling softly at her. “Thank you,” he cooed, eyes full of adoration as Mila giggled under his touch.

The mood completely broke when Sunoo looked at the male beside Mila and said, “I don’t think we’ve met properly.”

Taking the cue, the male actor bowed formally towards the members with a smile. As soon as he straightened his back, he introduced himself confidently. “My name is Park Hajoon. I’m a model and actor under Hybe. It’s nice to meet you all.”

Jungwon was the first to greet him back. “Nice to meet you.”

The other followed suit, leaving Mila to smile brightly on the side. So far, she would say they were doing very well in putting aside their personal feelings — it looked like they didn’t have to worry about much at all. She cleared her throat as she gestured to the script.

“We were just practising for our scene together,” she announced. “Hajoon here thinks we can get it done in one take.”

“That’s good,” Sunghoon immediately responded. By his logic, one take meant that they would be done as soon as possible, meaning that he, Mila, and the other members would be free to go back to the dorms sooner. Hopefully he would be able to steal Mila for some cuddles before the others got to her…

“How’s it going so far?” Jay asked. “Anything you’re struggling with?”

Instead of Mila, Hajoon was the one who replied.

“Not at all,” he said happily. “Mila-sunbaenim is really good at acting, so we already have a good idea of what we’re supposed to be doing.” Hajoon held a thumbs up as he smiled at Mila. “She’s really awesome.”

Sunoo eyed Hajoon suspiciously. He could pinpoint admiration when he saw it, and from the way this Hajoon person looked at Mila, the youngest knew for a fact that he held a lot of it for Mila — and dare he say, perhaps a little more than that…

Mila noticed this and explained, “Hajoon here has been a fan of mine since I-Land. Isn’t that great?”

“Ah, really?” Kiara asked with wide eyes. “Wah, how cute! You must be really happy to be working beside someone you’ve been a fan of for so long, right?” Kiara’s eyes had a hint of sly calculation when Hajoon nodded enthusiastically. She then asked, “What do you think? Is she prettier in person?”

Jake and Jay, who were standing next to Kiara, immediately threw a glare towards the older female, who grinned smugly. The others had their attention pointed towards the male in question, who had suddenly turned redder than a tomato under the sudden scrutiny of everyone.

Mila’s eyes widened as Hajoon dropped his head and rubbed the back of his neck. “Eung… She’s really beautiful.”

Kiara laughed light-heartedly and patted the flustered Hajoon on the shoulder. “Well, you’re lucky to be able to act as her boyfriend for one day. Make sure to cherish it while it lasts.”

“Ah— o-okay,” Hajoon stuttered out, turning even redder than before. And this of course, did not go unnoticed.

Kiara hummed, pleased by his reaction. With that, the elder female sauntered off towards her seat, escaping the inevitable fallout that would follow her controversial statement. As soon as she was gone, Hajoon found himself under the scrutiny of seven males who eyed him as if they were predators and he was a rival who appeared randomly in the wilderness.

He supposed he expected this. After all, having followed Mila’s journey for so long, he also got to know her members fairly well. And anyone who knew Enhypen knew that to get to the Princess, they would have to get past her seven knights first.

“So…” Heeseung crossed his arms over his chest. “You must be really happy that you get to act as Mila’s lover, right?”

Before Hajoon could reply, Mila rolled her eyes and gently tugged in Heeseung’s arms to uncross them. “Oppa, stop. You’re intimidating him. People might think you’re having a power-trip over your juniors!”

For good measure, Mila added a pout and used her eyes to plead at him. And just like always, Heeseung’s resolve immediately faltered.

“Okay, okay…” Heeseung turned to Hajoon. The latter immediately noticed that the light in Heeseung’s eyes from when he was looking upon Mila immediately flickered out as soon as they landed on him. Nonetheless, the elder offered a civil smile. “Sorry about that. I’m not trying to scare you.”

“That’s right.” Jungwon immediately followed up the elder’s statement with his own excuses. “The older members just worry a lot — don’t mind them.”

Despite the reassuring words he spoke, the smile on his face didn’t quite reach them.

Hajoon nodded and cleared his throat. “No, it’s okay! I already know that you’re quite protective — but don’t worry, I don’t plan on taking advantage of my role in the trailer today to satisfy my own selfishness. I admire Mila-sunbaenim a lot, but I respect her enough to maintain a professional boundary. I’m here to do my job and nothing more.”

Jay would be the first to admit he was pretty impressed with the actor’s initiative. He was sceptical at first of his obvious infatuation with Mila (call it a man’s intuition), but he did feel a little better seeing his conviction.

The rest of the boys — though some more begrudging than the others — would agree: Even if they were still very much jealous, they could tell the actor was sincere and had a pure soul. There was no reason to dislike him. They slowly started to lose some tension in their bodies.

“Okay, now that we got that cleared up, do you mind giving me and Hajoon some peace and quiet?”

Mila crossed her arms over her chest and raised an eyebrow, challenging the boys to keep them any longer from doing their job. The boys, being wise, immediately heeded the silent warning in her voice, which was perhaps the most polite form of ‘Play nice’ that they would get from her if they didn’t act right away.

“Yes, ma’am!”

Mila sighed as the boys scurried away. Shaking her head, she immediately gestured for Hajoon to take a seat. “Sorry about them, they can be a bit much.”

Hajoon shook his head. “No, it’s fine. If anything, I find it sweet that they openly show how much they care about you.”

Mila failed to hold back a smile as she replayed the boys’ reactions to Hajoon’s admiration for her. Even if she didn’t admit it, she did feel a bit giddy seeing them act so protective of her — even if she had to scold them a bit for being too intimidating.

“You know — you’re not wrong there…”

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

NOT TO BE OVERLY DRAMATIC, but Jungwon felt as if he was kicked in the stomach.

The staff had moved all the equipment to the cottage set for Mila and Hajoon’s scene together, with the cameramen and director being inside to film while the other Enhypen members and staff remained camped outside with monitoring screens. The scene between Mila and Hajoon was only a couple of seconds long, and so wasn’t prolonged agony by any means — but it didn’t make it any less painful to watch.

Jay, Jake and Sunghoon were smart enough not to watch it at all — however the others found themselves huddled around the monitoring screen, eyes fixated on the scene playing out before them.

Jungwon pouted as Hajoon caressed Mila’s face tenderly, the same way he would when they were in the privacy of their homes. (It was at times like this when he wished they didn’t have to hide their relationship from the public eye — so that he could unapologetically show off just how much he loved her.) Mila looked up at Hajoon with glassy eyes, letting him wipe freshly fallen tears from her face with a gentle swipe of his thumb.

At that moment, Heeseung wordlessly turned around and left, leaving the three youngest members alone in front of the scene. Jungwon bit his lip as Hajoon leaned down, his face impossibly close to Mila’s. Riki scoffed, before turning away and following after the eldest of the group. And just like that, only Sunoo and Jungwon remained.

Hajoon’s eyes flickered down to Mila’s lips. Almost reflexively, Jungwon’s hand clenched into a fist. He didn’t even know why he was still standing there — and yet he couldn’t look away, either, even as Mila’s lips slowly drifted towards the crook of Hajoon’s neck.

“CUT!”

The sound of the director’s voice couldn’t have been anything but intervention from the universe — otherwise how could he have known to stop the scene as soon as Jungwon had reached his limit?

“They have pretty good chemistry…”

Jungwon turned to Sunoo in confusion. When he did, he was surprised to see the expression on his face — nothing like the ray of sunshine that fans knew him to be, but one that resembled the sly fox hidden beneath his sweet smiles. Sharp eyes, and a cool expression, complete with a sharp twist of his lips.

Jungwon blinked, but didn’t get to say anything as Sunoo walked away. This hyung…

Jungwon shook his head and turned to the cottage, where he could just make out Mila and Hajoon bowing to the staff through the window. He immediately ran towards the currently empty gazebo, awaiting the moment when Mila would walk out. And as soon as she appeared, he threw himself onto her, pulling her into a hidden corner from prying eyes and clinging onto her like she would disappear if he didn’t.

“Oh— Wonie?” Mila laughed as soon as she realised who had unexpectedly jumped on her, a fond smile breaking out onto her face as she reciprocated the younger male’s hug. “What’s this all of a sudden?”

Jungwon didn’t respond, instead opting to bury his face deeper into her hair. He was too embarrassed to admit he was feeling this jealous over something meaningless, so he could only stay silent and hope Mila didn’t think of him as too clingy when he did.

Mila hummed. “Are you feeling jealous, by any chance?”

Jungwon felt his face heat up at being caught so quickly. But then again, Mila had always been the perceptive type. He gave a nod, causing Mila to giggle softly. Her fingers made their way to the top of Jungwon’s head, threading their way through his soft hair and filling Jungwon’s being with comfort.

“It’s okay to feel that way, Wonie,” she said gently. “When it’s just the two of us, you don’t have to be pressured to feel like a leader, remember? You don’t need to hide how you feel.”

“I know that, but…” Jungwon’s hands travelled down Mila’s sides before they settled around her waist. Jungwon frowned as he pulled away, before eating his forehead against Mila. “Can I have a kiss, please?”

Mila’s eyes widened. “A kiss?”

Jungwon hummed. “You said if I needed reminding that you were still mine, I could steal kisses from you on set… There’s no one here — so it should be fine, right?”

Mila blinked. “It’s fine…”

“Then kiss me,” Jungwon whispered, his eyes glassy and vulnerable as they stared into hers. Mila swallowed nervously as they travelled downwards, landing on her parted lips. Jungwon’s hands tightened their grip on her, his broad shoulders rising and falling with a deep breath. “I think I’ll go crazy if you don’t…” 

Mila didn’t have to be told twice. As if possessed by his command, she pulled him down by the neck, so that his lips would find hers. The moment they met was like the collision of stars, forming something far brighter, far hotter than what they were on their own, consuming all others around them until there was nothing but the two of them left.

Milan’s hands wandered to Jungwon’s shoulders, smoothing down the length of them with trembling touch. She let out a stuttering breath when his lips parted from hers, taking in a gulp of fresh air — only to come crashing back towards hers once more. This time, more fiercely than before. His hands tightened their grip on their waist for a final time, before he parted for the final time, painting softly for air.

Jungwon let the final tendrils of the flame within him simmer down so that only ashes of his bitterness remained, completely doused by the sweetness of Mila’s mouth. Her face was flushed as she gazed up at him, eyes glazed over, as if lost in a trance — and Jungwon didn’t know if that was her own feelings, or if he was just looking at the reflection of his own eyes. For even if he couldn’t see his own face at that moment, he knew he had fallen far deeper than she had.

“‘How dare you, baby? My heart craves you…” Mila’s eyes widened as Jungwon began to softly sing all-too familiar words, his smooth and sultry voice sending a rush of electricity through her veins. “Even though I’m still a monster…”

“That’s…”

Jungwon chuckled softly. “It’s from one of our songs. ‘Still Monster.’ I don’t know why I thought of it all of a sudden… For some reason it just reminded me of you.”

Mila’s inhaled sharply, her heart thumping wildly in her chest. “Sing more for me,” she whispered. “What else about it reminds you of me?”

Jungwon began to smirk, an all-too familiar glint in the depths of his Cheshire eyes. His hand wonders down the beck of her neck, fingers brushing gently against her pulse. And with a voice all too alluring, he began to sing.

“‘The purity of her neck makes me crazy,’” he began, “‘Throws me into a desire I cannot cope with…”

Just like that, Mila’s lips collided with his once more.

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

IT WAS TIME FOR MILA AND SUNOO TO FILM THE FINAL SCENE OF THE CONCEPT TRAILER. The moment which Sunoo had been anxiously anticipating — and admittedly, so was Mila.

She hadn’t gotten to see the others after her small rendezvous with Jungwon, and had to go straight into filming again before the sun went down. By now, she had finished filming the opening part of their scene, where Mila was running towards the remains of the burning house, and was now standing there, awaiting the next scene — where Mila would sense Sunoo standing behind her and run up to him to hug him.

As the two waited for the camera crew to get ready for filming, they stood side by side, chatting carefreely.

“You did a good job filming with Hajoon earlier,” Sunoo suddenly said, with a petty undertone in his voice. “It was reallyyyyy believable.”

Mila scoffed. “Yah, are you being petty right now?”

Sunoo raised his eyebrows. “No. Why would I? It’s not like I had to watch you act so lovingly with some other man and make it look so real. I have no reason to be petty.”

Mila huffed and turned her head away, crossing her arms over her chest in defiance. “I’m not the one who had some woman’s lips on my neck,” she muttered.

She didn’t want to think about it too much, but she knew that the scene between Jiwon and Sunoo would likely bother her when she eventually watched it. But she already had a dash of bitterness about it after hearing Kiara’s account of the scene, which supposedly was very intense. So Mila figured why not get the pettiness out of her before then. After all, Sunoo was the one who started it.

“What was that?” Sunoo asked.

“Nothing,” Mila replied.

Before anyone could say anything, the director suddenly called for everyone to get into positions. Mila turned away and walked to her starting position, leaving Sunoo to narrow his eyes at her from behind.

He had heard exactly what Mila had said — he just didn’t know it was that big of a deal for her. After all, it was nowhere near the level of what Jay and Sunghoon had with Jiwon in the previous concept trailer. But then again, Mila had always been somewhat possessive in her own way — even if she didn’t admit it.

Sunoo let out a small chuckle as he watched her stamp her way to her spot. Even if she was acting a little bratty, he still found her cute. And what sort of boyfriend would he be if he didn’t comfort her?

Better yet: What sort of boyfriend would he be if he didn’t upstage the performance between Mila and Hajoon with his own? After all, he couldn’t have anyone thinking a random male was a better fit for Mila than him, could he? His pride as a man wouldn’t let that happen. He formulated his own plan in his head and gave himself a satisfied smile when he decided what to do. 

Not long after, the director finally signalled for the filming to begin.

Mila turned around to face Sunoo and had a shocked expression on her face. Sunoo internally admired her acting as her shock morphed into unadulterated joy, a wide smile breaking out on her face as he held out a bouquet of flowers. The familiar chime of Mila’s laughter flooded Sunoo’s ears as she ran towards him, before throwing herself into his arms.

The next part came as naturally as it could have. One could say, Mila and Sunoo didn’t need a script for it. Sunoo lowered his head to bury his nose into her hair. His hand with the bouquet wrapped around her waist while the other found its way to the back of her head.

That was supposed to be it. But of course, it wasn’t. Sunoo’s lips brushed against the shell of Mila’s ear, causing the girl’s figure to freeze in his arms.

Wait, Mila thought. This isn’t part of the script.

Mila stood there frozen as she felt Sunoo’s lips travel down to her earlobe, and then further until it found itself on the bare skin of Mila’s neck. She felt her breath hitch in her throat as his plush lips sneakily found the most sensitive part of her neck — a spot he was very familiar with. Her pulse quickened, and her face started to feel when she suddenly felt his lips part, as if ready to kiss the spot then and there. 

The other members, who were watching from the monitor screen a distance away, were immediately taken aback when Sunoo looked at the camera with a sharp glare. He looked like a fox warning anyone who came close to stay away from both him and the woman in his arms — challenging and possessive.

The staff could only watch in awe at the electricity in the air. The tension between the two young people whose seemingly unidentified embrace became something more possessive — more carnal. And at that moment they accepted that, as expected, the chemistry between members of the same group was unmatched…

“AAAAND CUT!” The director yelled.

Mila barely heard his voice, or the following praises that he yelled at Mila and Sunoo, claiming that they were ‘perfect’ together. Instead, she could only shakily part from the hug between her and Sunoo, before searching his face for some sign of what had happened.

“Still jealous of Jiwon?” he asked teasingly.

Mila swallowed and shook her head. Every time she saw Sunoo like this — so assertive and, dare she say, masculine — she was never able to form words. Just his presence alone made her speechless. “N-no…”

After all, Jiwon wasn’t the woman who felt Sunoo’s lips on her neck in front of so many spectators. She would be foolish to still hold any jealousy towards the female after that bold display on Sunoo’s end.

“Man, this is so not fair!” Jake complained as he watched the pair stare into each other’s eyes, unplaced by the amount of people around them.

“I want to film a scene with Mila,” Sunghoon said sulkily.

“Next time we choose a concept we should ask about the concept trailers first,” Riki proposed. “Why does only Sunoo-hyung get to film with her?”

“YAH!” Jay yelled. His voice was loud enough that it carried to where Sunoo and Mila were standing together, causing them to break apart in surprise. “The shoot is over — stop hugging each other already!”

Sunoo and Mila shared a look. Their laughter was so loud the others could hear it perfectly, despite the distance between them.

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

THAT NIGHT, the members of Enhypen congratulated themselves on a job well done.

They still had a few more things to do for their comeback, but at the very least, they had made it through the concept trailer… Even if it was just barely. They (minus Kiara) had gathered in the living room to both enjoy each other’s company and to rid themselves of the bitterness from today’s shoot. Namely, their jealousy towards Mila and Hajoon’s scenes together.

“I’m so glad that’s over with,” Jake said. “I don’t ever want to see that kind of thing again. Never again, man.”

Mila laughed. “It wasn’t THAT bad.”

“‘Wasn’t THAT bad?’” Sunghoon raised his eyebrows. “The two of you looked like you would have kissed if the director didn’t say ‘cut’.”

Mila tilted her head. “I thought you didn’t watch me while filming?”

“He wasn’t,” Heeseung replied. “But later on, he asked the cameraman if he could watch the scene again, because he wanted to see how bad it was. His logic was that if he didn’t see it in real time, he could control his emotions better — but he still got jealous.”

“You’re one to talk, hyung.” Sunoo crossed his legs on the couch. “You’re the one who scared Hajoon the most.”

The other boys immediately nodded in agreement, convicting the eldest member for his actions.

“But you know… I was kind of embarrassed today,” Jay admitted. “Even though I know it doesn’t mean anything, I still get jealous over it.” Jay sighed. “I wish I had better control over my feelings… Then things would be easier for all of us.”

 A thick silence fell over the eight of them. None of them knew what to say, but it was clear that Jay wasn’t alone in his feelings. If Mila was honest, she herself had thought similar things before. And it was because of that she was able to find the words to comfort him.

“Me too,” she said. All eyes turned to her. “We’re only human, so it’s natural that we can’t control how we feel…” She smiled. “That’s why I wrote those lyrics.”

The boys became puzzled. Only Riki — who was there with her though the whole process — knew what she was talking about and smiled conspiratorially. He had been wondering when she was going to tell the others about her contribution. It seemed that she was saving it for this moment.

In truth, Mila had a feeling the boys would react this way. That they would struggle to come to terms with the fact that, for some reason, they were reliving the same memories over and over again. And so, she thought that perhaps this would give them comfort in some way.

“‘It’s as if nothing happened, you look at me with shadowless eyes…’” The boys’ (with the exception of Riki) eyes widened as Mila sang the opening lyrics to ‘Still Monster’. Realisation slowly sank in as she continued to sing, “‘I’m the one who’s been forgive countless times, but I’m still a monster…””

Mila laughed at the shocked expressions on their faces. She shared a smile with Riki before ending her serenade there.

“Obviously the lyrics are a bit more dramatic to suit the concept… but the meaning is practically the same,” she said.

“You wrote that?” Jake asked in awe. “For us?”

“Angel, why didn’t you say anything?” Jay added with a wide smile, amazement and pride all to clear on his features. “That’s amazing!”

Mila smiled sheepishly as the boys began to shower her with praises.

“I didn’t know you could write lyrics… Good job,” Sunghoon said as he patted Mila’s hair. “I’m proud of you.”

Heeseung smiled. “We all are.” He then hummed as he remembers the lyrics to the song, now seeing each line in a new light. “So that’s what they meant… If I knew it then, I probably would have given a better performance.”

Mila laughed. “I doubt you could have done better than you already did. But anyway— those lyrics were basically my feelings about you guys… I mess up a lot, and sometimes I let my emotions get the better of me. But each time you help me become better. And by the end of it, I know that you’re the only ones I’d want to be with.”

“‘What is love to me? Teaching love…’”

Sunoo began part of the chorus, immediately followed by the others who joined in.

“‘In the end, the answer is always, only you.’”

Mila laughed as realisation spread over their faces. “So? What do you think?” she asked. “Do you know what I’m trying to tell you?”

“Awwww, Baby…” Jake sprung into Mila and pulled her into his chest, smothering her with love. “I’m not jealous anymore! I’m just really happy…”

Heeseung giggled like a giddy lovesick teenager. “I’ve never had someone write a song about me.”

“Me too!” Sunoo was beaming so widely, his eyes became descents.

“You did so good, Angel,” Jay praised. “You always know what to say, don’t you?” 

Riki gave Mila a smug look that said, ‘Told you so.’ Mila laughed and shook her head, causing both Riki and Jungwon (who was next to him) to smile at her with all the fondness and adoration that a man could afford their lover.

Sunghoon, who was still in awe, was zoned out, staring blankly at a distant spot in the wall. After a few seconds, Jay lightly nudged his shoulder, completely breaking his trance.

“Yah, are you still there?” Jay asked.

“Huh?” Sunghoon shook his head. “Uh, yeah… I’m just still in shock. It’s hard to believe you wrote it for us… I’m touched. I think I might cry.”

Everyone laughed. Jay roughly pat Sunghoon on the back, and the previous tension in the air became infinitely lightened. After the revelation of Mila’s hidden talents, the boys — curious about hr work — continued to barrage her with questions, while simultaneously praising her to the heavens and back.

But one question in particular had Mila incapable of responding coherently.

“Wait a minute…” Jungwon tilted his head. “Does that mean you also wrote that line?”

Mila hummed. “Which one?”

Jungwon smirked. “You know… The one I sang to you before: ‘The purity of your neck—’”

“Ah!” Mila suddenly shot in from her seat was standing completely still as seven curious eyes turned to her. “No— you see— the thing is… they had to adjust the lyrics a bit to fit the vampire concept! So they… Well… Uh…”

“Ayyyyy,” Sunghoon teased. “Don’t tell me…”

“Wait so you have a thing for our necks?” Jake asked with a tilted head.

“NO!” Mila shouted.

Sunoo raised his eyebrow. “But then what about the lyrics, then?”

“You know, now that I think about it…” Jay pretended to be in deep thought, stroking his chin like a sage would his beard. “She does seem to like neck kisses a lot—“

Mila’s face almost exploded from how hot it was. “SHUT UP AND LET ME EXPLAIN!”

The room was filled with laughter as the busy observed Mila’s flustered state. And really — what else did she expect from them? Of course they had to tease her right after giving her so many compliments….

Indeed, some things never changed.

︲ 还是你 〢 𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔

TAGLiST !

@lanamoonroh @3amstarlight @nikitopia @one16core @onlyuyu @xinikons @clar-iii @shinrjj @nee-issaire @elizalabs3 @lol6sposts @cyberpunksunwoo @woonkies @alaezasmystery235 @haechansbbg @wonsctz @euniceruiz11 @curly-fr13s

DiA READERS

ahhh it’s so good to be back 😭 sorry for the wait guys but finally a full length chapter for you guys after my very long break🤭 (a very long chapter too— almost 10k wowza 🤯) i figured that we had so many hyung like focused fics that the maknae line should have time to shine - which is why this one focused a lot on their interactions with mila 😌 the ending was a bit meh bc i ran out of brain juice so sorry about that — but hopefully you enjoyed it nonetheless!! 🫶🫶🫶

but thank you guys for all your patience though the break and for being sl understanding! love you guys sm you’re the best readers na author could ask for and my break just made me appreciate you all the more MWAH MWAH MWAH 🩷🩷🩷

P.S. obv mila didn’t actually write still monster and credit goes to the actually writer, but let’s pretend 😆 also! for the anonnie who made this request for manly sunoo - hope this satisfied the requirements! 🫶

1 year ago

if the person I'm marrying ain't like this, I don't want themmmmm 👎👎👎😭😭

ceo! husband park jongseong (jay) x stay at home mum! fem reader texts

MDNI !!! 18+ ONLY

content warnings: smut, hurt/comfort, reader has body image issues, hinted eating disorder, the poor baby has colic, breeding, daddy kink, husband jay (needs a warning by itself because husband jay is soooooo >>>>)

a/n: jay’s contact on reader’s phone is seojinnie appa as parents in korea usually call their spouses ____-ie appa/eomma after they have kids and i always thought that was soooo cute so … i gave in to temptation

Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
Ceo! Husband Park Jongseong (jay) X Stay At Home Mum! Fem Reader Texts
1 year ago
Look. All Of Them Were So Adorable And Handsome But Lee Know Was Serving. Lee Know Owns The Mv For ‘There’.
Look. All Of Them Were So Adorable And Handsome But Lee Know Was Serving. Lee Know Owns The Mv For ‘There’.
Look. All Of Them Were So Adorable And Handsome But Lee Know Was Serving. Lee Know Owns The Mv For ‘There’.
Look. All Of Them Were So Adorable And Handsome But Lee Know Was Serving. Lee Know Owns The Mv For ‘There’.
Look. All Of Them Were So Adorable And Handsome But Lee Know Was Serving. Lee Know Owns The Mv For ‘There’.
Look. All Of Them Were So Adorable And Handsome But Lee Know Was Serving. Lee Know Owns The Mv For ‘There’.

look. all of them were so adorable and handsome but lee know was serving. lee know owns the mv for ‘There’.

1 year ago

another night, another fic of hyunjin to cry for

DRUNKEN WITH A SENSE OF LOVE | HWANG HYUNJIN.

genre | romance / drunken confessions / fake dating au

synopsis | you and hyunjin got drunk at different times, and you two took care of each other similarly. 

word count | 7.1k+

warning | mentions of insecurity / brief allusion to sexual themes / alcohol and drunkenness  

note | i changed almost everything about this.

DRUNKEN WITH A SENSE OF LOVE | HWANG HYUNJIN.
DRUNKEN WITH A SENSE OF LOVE | HWANG HYUNJIN.
DRUNKEN WITH A SENSE OF LOVE | HWANG HYUNJIN.
DRUNKEN WITH A SENSE OF LOVE | HWANG HYUNJIN.

Hyunjin has gotten himself etched to the back of your mind, and you genuinely did not like that.

You didn't blame him, though. If anything, you blame yourself for falling so head over heels for him.

For one, Hyunjin couldn’t help who falls in love with him. He couldn’t suppress his overwhelmingly good looks if he tried, which he never did. He enjoyed the positive attention, however shallow they often were. He also couldn’t put a pause on his decent personality, which came as a genuine surprise to you after you got to know him better through this fake dating scheme. You always thought beautiful people harbored the ugliest heart, out of envy and bitterness. Hyunjin wasn’t like that. You didn’t think he was, at least. 

For two, you should have known better than to fall in love with a man leagues above your selection pool. People called it self-degradation, a lack of self-esteem, having no self-worth, and whatnot. You considered it a down-to-earth trait, a reality check, understanding your limits, and whatnot. Hyunjin was a boy you should fall in love with in moderation but never utterly, ardently, absolutely. You were, unfortunately, the latter. 

For three, and this was the stupidest part, you two were temporarily dating. Hyunjin was honest when he approached you and said that his friends, at the ripe age of twenties and pursuing higher education, thought you were good enough to be the butt of a romantic joke. They had challenged him to chase you, get you into a relationship, and break your heart. It was a heinous and, frankly, childish game, but you agreed to it with him for the prize money. 

It was worth it at that time. It was easy money! Who wouldn’t want that? You didn’t feel that way now. Pretending to be in a loving relationship with him has short-term perks but long-term losses. 

Hyunjin was practically in you, etched to the back of your mind, tattooed on the inside of your skin, taken by your bloodied hands to the bottom of your grave. The degree to which your heart dropped for him was unexplainable by yourself. Therefore, having the excuse to go on dates and hold his hands in public, snuggle with him during outings with his friends, and maintain a pleasant friendship with him behind closed doors were great experiences. But when the time comes for separation, you will hurt, not merely over the breakup, but the reminder that he has never felt more for you, that your wonderful experience with him was just an experience.

Clumsy stumbling could be heard outside his apartment, and not a second later came a round of demanding knocks. Hyunjin's head perked up at the noise, his eyes wide in alert at the sudden banging. He looked at the door momentarily before finally looking over to the clock, his brows furrowing slightly at the late time. He waited to check if it could be a drunken stranger approaching the wrong door, but soon enough, another round of aggressive knocks sounded.

Holding the thought that it could just be his roommate, Han Jisung, coming back home late for yet another odd reason, and also praying inwardly that he wouldn't have to spend the night taking care of a loud, obnoxious, and very drunk Jisung, he made his way up and approached the door.

Flinging the door open, Hyunjin did a double-take before his annoyed expression morphed into one of surprise. His arm went slack against the wooden frame of the door, and he took an instinctive step forward when he saw your drunken state—your features were scrunched up in discomfort, your eyes squinted because astigmatism had taken over on your walk to the apartment building, and you were hunched over. You were not at all the way you used to look, not the way he was used to seeing you, which was always so presentable and well put together.

An amused smile appeared on his face as he eyed you up and down, wanting nothing more than to make fun of and tease you even without your ability to form the perfect retorts he has grown to be highly fond of. But you sniffed for a moment and took a step forward. In that exact second, you had Hyunjin doubling over to catch you before you could fall to the floor, concern lining up the crinkles of his eyes as he looked down at you.

"Woah, alright! Let’s stand slowly, okay?" he commanded gently, cooing at your side as if talking to a child. 

His arms curled around your shoulder and waist with a protective grip, and he hoisted your weight by supporting you with his own. Pulling you into the apartment, he shut the door slowly with his feet before returning his attention to you, hoping to bring you to the couch where you could lie down and rest.

“Jeez, babe, how much did you drink?” he laughed, dragging your unresponsive body along with him.

You groaned lowly, trying your best to hold down the acidic taste rushing at the back of your mouth. You wouldn’t know it, but this was not what you had planned for the night. Your friends did their job sending you home safely. Who would have thought you’d leave your apartment shortly after just to stumble to Hyunjin’s home? It was a short distance from your place, but what a miracle you made it without any major accidents! And what a disaster you made it to his home while being high on alcoholic honesty!

You snapped your head up. You were at the perfect angle to stare at his side profile, allowing you the premium shot of his perfect jawline, luscious locks, beautiful lashes, button tip of his nose, and just the most kissable lips you have ever seen. A grimace reached your face. It was an instinctive response. His good looks indeed couldn’t hide even behind the blurriest of eyes. You thought if you lied to your body enough, your mind would follow, so you grimaced whenever you looked at him, hoping to start disliking him. It hasn’t worked. 

"Hwang Hyunjin,” you muttered.

He chuckled. “Yes. That is me."

You gulped, still staring at him. Then, as you lowered your eyes to the floor, you leisurely suggested what’s been on your mind recently, “We should break up."

Of all the things you have done within these few months of him meeting you, including you agreeing to help him lie to his friends about this fake dating challenge to punching someone in the face for shaming his impulsive sex life, which you weren’t surprised he has, this one caught him off guard the most. This one also made him panic. It was fear, like sweaty hands and dry lips, like his mind racing with terrible thoughts, racing with made-up reasons as to why you would want that, racing with every single action he has done that could be counted as a mistake.

"Wh–what? Why do you–why? Why are we breaking up? We are fine. I didn't do anything–did I do something?" Hyunjin stuttered, unconsciously tightening his grip on your body before he let out a gentle but firm whisper, "No."

“I know, I am sorry. I don’t know–I’m just sorry,” you slurred, long stopped looking at him and instead was now leaning your entire weight against him like a wall. Your hands waved about in the air. "You are mad at me, aren't you? Of course–“ you snorted obnoxiously–“it’s a lot of money! I’ll pay you. Break up with me, don’t be mad.”

Hyunjin stared at you as you laughed manically. It sounded choked up, like you’ve got wet coughs prepared in your throat, but he could tell you were far from shedding tears, unlike good ol’ sensitive him, who remained in a state of anxiety and was still trying to process why you brought up separation. It wasn’t time for the fake dating to end. It was nowhere near it! To suggest breaking up so early must mean something was wrong with him, but what was? He couldn’t tell! To think he was just losing his mind over what to do once it was time for this fake relationship to end. 

“Hyunjin,” you called him once when you noticed his silence. Looking up at him, you furrowed your brows and reached up to brush his face clumsily with your hand, pushing your fingertips against his skull. “Hyunjin? Hey. Answer me. Hey. Hello. Hyunjin!”

He leaned away from your aggressive touch, his shoulders relaxing at your playful antics. A smile formed uncontrollably on his lips when you doubled down on smearing your hands all over his face after his dodges. He was left haplessly struggling between missing your direct eyeball pokes and keeping you from falling to the ground. You grinned out loud; he mirrored it, and he didn’t hear the sound of your laughs mixing together because he hears it all the time.

“You are very drunk, [Name],” he managed to comment after grabbing both of your hands and keeping them at his face level. His tight-lipped smile sparkled when you attempted a struggle, like a parent reprimanding their child, then he moved your hands to your face and squeezed your cheeks together. Your lip jutted out in response. He leaned in to kiss your cupid’s bow. “You’re being silly. Let’s get you cleaned up and back to bed.”

The frown on your face made him nervous. His hands slowly slipped from your face, and your hands fell to your sides. You remained silent, and he let the clogs in your brain move. Your thoughts weren’t clear. The only thing you were sure of was that the man standing before you was Hwang Hyunjin, your temporary boyfriend, and you’d spent the whole night trying to drink your feelings for him away. You came to his apartment for a reason—you needed to break up with him for your own good.

“No, I can’t go to bed yet. I have something to do.” You yawned and waved an arm dismissively. You spoke before you finished yawning, leaving your words hanging in the air in slow motion. “I came to tell you something.”

Hyunjin’s hands curled into fists. He let go, tightened them, and let go again to alleviate the sweat gathering at his palms. You were surprisingly hell-bent on the topic, which led him to believe it went beyond a moment of drunkenness. It must have been a conclusion formed long ago, and you have just now mustered the courage to let him know. But why? What did he do? What did he not do? 

He was more than nervous, if there was a word to describe the state of his heart. This was more than a personal problem, which he admittedly still has to work through, but far more significant than himself was you—his feelings for you, his immense affection for you, the fact that he loved you the way you warned yourself not to love him but did anyway. It wasn’t your fault. Your observant eyes, your sincerity, your care for him. It wasn’t your fault. He fell in love with you of his own accord.

If you left him, he would be like a dog without a leash, a dog without an owner. He would wander aimlessly, filled with rage and dread, sniffing every darkened corner for a whiff of your scent. 

“Are you breaking up with me?” he asked meekly. 

You sucked in a deep breath to counter your congested chest, then you shook your head in agreement. “Yes.” 

You were very drunk. He shouldn’t take your words into consideration. “That’s fine,” he said as he stepped toward you, “can we get cleaned up and go to bed anyway? It’s very late.”

“No, I don’t want you touching me anymore.” You stepped back dramatically and hugged yourself into a protective stance. “It’s for the better.” 

He wondered what that meant. Were you repulsed by him? Did you finally realize how disgusting his inability to stay away from sexual and romantic validation was? Were you ashamed to be associated with him because of his impulsive behavior? He was only good for a short time; did you come to that realization? You were too good for him. He always knew that.

Hyunjin retreated his hand from mid-air. His hands met before his abdomen, his fingers immediately picking at each other as he uncomfortably shifted his weight. The corner of his lips arched downward at your rejection, but he tried to keep them neutral so he wouldn’t be influenced into crying. There wasn’t much else he could do with himself if being near you was no longer an option. He looked lost and wronged; he felt so.

“[Name], did I do something?” he asked, rubbing his elbow awkwardly. “Why do you suddenly want to break up with me?”

You blinked at a random space on the wall. Sitting below your sight was a messy square table with unwashed cups, scattered papers, and a closed laptop. Even in a state of haze, you knew they didn’t belong to him. Hyunjin was more organized than that. He told you once it made his school experience much easier to have everything in one place: his computer, which you knew he often kept in his school bag. You sniffed; you knew him like the back of your hand. 

“I can’t tell you,” you replied slowly, not looking at him. “It’s a secret.” 

Hyunjin tilted his head. “I won’t tell anyone, I promise.” 

He sounded convincing, so you gradually moved your eyes to access him. Standing in front of you, timid as a mouse, was Hwang Hyunjin. You knew that, and you knew that your secret was to be kept from him. Yet, somehow, all that did not register once you were engaged in a conversation with him. He was Hyunjin, just a person you were talking to. If he promised not to tell, then it should be fine. 

“You promise?” you asked. 

Hyunjin nodded. “I promise.” 

You pouted with a glare, willing him to waver and show any sign of deception, but he stood his ground and waited for you to expose your deepest and darkest feelings to him. A faint grumble sounded from your mouth. You looked around briefly to check for any eavesdroppers before you walked a few tentative steps toward him, and you confessed, “I’m in love with you.” 

It was like a shot through the heart, and the shot was aimed so successfully that the organ tore off its hinges and fell to his abdomen where his hands fiddled nervously with each other. It may be asking for an exit out of his body, it may be seeking its new owner, or it may come knocking boldly at your mouth and ask to fit inside you. Hyunjin remained perplexed at your confession. The confession had a bitter taste; he wasn’t sure what to make of it or if he deserved it from someone like you. 

“[Name]…” 

“I’m sorry,” you apologized. “I am very in love with you. It’s stupid.” 

He couldn’t tell, but you understood, despite a fogged mind, that letting him know your affection for him was a cause for your demise. Your emotions were in a whirlwind, collecting up the fragments of all the heart pieces you've broken because of Hyunjin and how you had confronted yourself multiple times with your own delusions that this wouldn't be like the movies. He would never fall in love with you just because you two got closer from months of fake dating.

Even then, he was empathetic to your body language, especially how much they mirrored his. His shoulders slumped at how you turned away from him to trail your attention off somewhere safer, where he wasn’t in your sight. Registering his beautiful face was hard for you because you couldn’t have him; processing his existence and your proximity to him was difficult because you could never have him. You turned away from him to further signify to yourself the assumed truth, your trembling fingers pulling at each other to avoid an awkward standstill. 

Hyunjin was etched to the back of your brain. He was overwhelming, and he was far away. Unable to contain the sudden reminder that you were never going to get over him, a rush of tears started to tremble their way up to your eyes. Your face scrunched without remorse, and your head dropped near your shoulders alarmingly quickly that it startled him.

“I love you, I’m so sorry,” you sobbed. It made him panic. “Please break up with me.” 

“Why are we breaking up if you love me, silly?” he forced a laugh once he approached you. 

His lanky arms were clumsy and gentle after he pulled at his sweater sleeves to wipe your tears. They hovered awkwardly over your face, gauging how much strength to use to effectively dry your eyes but not push you any further away from him. He cooed a bunch of nonsense, but they were sweet like sleepy kisses on your hands. Eventually, he cupped your face and wiped your eyes with his thumbs. You let him; he made you laugh when he apologized for using too much force, even though he never did. 

“You don’t love me, Hyunjin,” you muttered. 

“Nonsense,” he retorted within a second, “who said that?”

You didn’t reply, so he stood with his arms raised for a whole minute while you leaned the weight of your head against his palms. He thought it terribly horrific that he ought to remember the shape of your face with his slender fingers because of his inability to sew his skin into yours. If his hands were like superglue, he could be attached to you forever—your face, your features, you, his most favorite thing in the world. His hands would burn, but what of it? Better you scorch him than to never be touched by you at all. 

“Hyunjin,” you called when you were finished zoning out.

“Mhm?” 

“I love you. I’m sorry,” you said. “I’m so ugly.” 

Growing up being valued for his beautiful features taught him to devalue it. He didn’t care for it. He wouldn't cry about it if he were to earn a permanent scar across his face. Yet, even then, if he were to have one, he was sure people would rave about how the scar ruined his face rather than talk about how he obtained it. Except for you. You’d ask about it, like you always asked everything about him. 

The kind of person you were, his most favorite person in the world—you were detailed like that, and you made him feel an essence of humanity others didn’t. With you, he wasn’t ethereal, he wasn’t a God, he wasn’t an angel fallen to Earth. He didn’t have to be because you never put him on some miraculous pedestal. He was just Hwang Hyunjin; his favorite food is his mother’s cooking, he makes clumsy mistakes and looks funny when he does, and he enjoys making art. 

Not a model, not God’s favorite, not pretty. Just a boy, and he’s in love with you.

“Okay,” he said, “I’m ugly too.” 

He didn’t deny your false claims; you were the prettiest he had ever known, but only he needed to know that. When there comes a time for him to praise and worship your physical body, he will. For now, there wasn’t anything much he wanted to say in return. Just that he was the same as you. 

Your souls didn’t collide that way, obviously. You two were completely different people with varying hobbies and friend groups. However, Hyunjin was willing to chase you like Hell to meet where you were. There wasn’t anything he wanted to be if he couldn’t be it with you. Whatever you are, he is.

There was another long pause. Hyunjin patiently waited, tender eyes concentrated on each crevice of your face as he stroked your stained cheeks with his thumb. You didn’t say anything more, only slapping your hands over his and pulling them from your face. He thought you were moving away, but you took a step forward instead and dove into his arms. You hugged him around his neck, hanging off him like a sloth. He chuckled, swaying you side to side. You were tired, he knew. 

“It’s getting late, baby,” he whispered, leaning back to watch your closed eyes and laughing. He ran a hand through your hair multiple times, getting a clearer view of your face. “Let’s clean up and go to bed, okay?”

You groaned and muttered in response. He didn’t hear what you said. He kept sweeping your hair back. Supporting you with his weight, you were heavy, but he didn’t mind. You wouldn’t be able to change your clothes by yourself, so he would help you. It’d be sloppy and slow, and he wouldn’t mind. You would take up most of the bed, sprawled out without a clue that you weren’t sleeping in your apartment. Your body heat would scratch up a fever in him, and he wouldn’t mind. He enjoyed taking care of you. 

Staring at him as he stroked your hair, you pouted before uttering three familiar words, “I love you.” 

Hyunjin smiled. Whatever you are, he is. He kissed your nose and your eyes. He told you he loves you too.

DRUNKEN WITH A SENSE OF LOVE | HWANG HYUNJIN.

It was one of those nights when Hyunjin couldn’t spend time with you, and you were unreasonably disappointed about it.

You slouched atop the couch you got at a flea market, which Hyunjin had to convince you to get after repeatedly reassuring you that there wouldn’t be any actual fleas hiding in the creases. This uncomfortable position resulted from five hours of continuous mumbling about how you should not be upset that Hyunjin didn’t choose to spend the night with you, which he had done the past few weeks. He has been somewhat clingy lately, and you couldn’t imagine why. You thought your act was good. There was no way his friends doubted you. 

This could be the calm before the storm. Even though you two had concocted a detailed timeline for your fake dating, you wouldn’t be surprised if Hyunjin abruptly cut it short. If that was true, his current sweetness was nothing more than a buildup to a dramatic and convincing breakup. 

Pouting in dismay, you rolled up the bag of chips and reached for the tea table beside you, your fingertips wiggling to graze past the black binder clip you used to keep the plastic bag sealed. Amid your frustrated groaning, still refusing to get your ass off the couch even after more than ten seconds of struggling, the doorbell suddenly rang, and coming after that were loud bangs at your door.

A shiver ran down your spine as you snapped your head toward the direction of the noise, your brows rising abruptly at the fearful intrusion. Slowly throwing your chip bag on the table, you stood up and tip-toed your way over to the door where you pressed your hands to the wooden surface and carefully looked through the peephole.

A gasp caught in your throat when you saw Hyunjin’s face standing just a few inches away from the circle as if leaning against the door for support. You immediately moved out and unlocked your door, swinging it open to reveal him fully. Taking a good look at his face before he started to throw his little drunken tantrum—messy hair, concentrated brows, droopy eyelids, and a general look of discomfort—you concluded that he definitely has been downing more shots than he could handle.

“What happened to you?” 

You stepped up to put your hands on either side of his arm, carefully bringing him into your apartment. He stumbled with most of his weight straining on your shoulder. There were so many stutters in his steps that you almost dragged him into a fall with you on your way to the couch. After setting him down, he snorted at the cushy feeling of your couch. It took him a while to process the new environment, and then he arched his neck to find you. 

Hyunjin could barely make out your face. He couldn’t even be sure if he went to your apartment, but subconsciously, he could tell he was at your place. He felt it in your timid touches just now, and whatever scent he whiffed out of the air, it smelt like you. Licking his lower lip as his worries slowly faded away and his attention—as much as he could muster—returned, he mumbled a string of incoherent noises under his breath before he, much to your palpitating heart’s dismay, pulled you onto the couch next to him. 

He got on top of you; his legs had to bend in weird ways to accommodate the small couch, and he placed his palms on either side of your head to trap you under him. You felt heat forming on your cheeks as you shrunk beneath his shadow, your eyes widening at the proximity. Hyunjin has never done this before. The closeness wasn’t new, but the position of it was. Being under him was an unbelievable feeling. He looked beautiful, and his toned muscles became more visible by supporting his own weight. How your thoughts were smeared! You doubted your body would forget how well he could cage you in. 

Hyunjin stared at you with a low, drunken hum. Then, suddenly, he leaned down to meet your face. 

“[Name],” he started, lowering his head tiredly to your shoulder, “you wanted to break up with me?”

You blinked up at the ceiling, confused, but you figured it could be the alcohol talking for him, so you chose to disregard all the questions that popped into your head. Holding out your arms to push against his chest, you attempted to sit up. “I don’t want to break up with you, Hyunjin.”

He seemed to be processing your answer as he allowed you to set him aside and give yourself more space. You sat quietly next to him, letting him have the time to think over what he wanted to say. The thoughtful pout on his face told you it was difficult for him to use his brain, but it looked cute enough that you almost took a picture to tease him about it once he got sober. You wondered if his response would be nonsense as well.

“Why do you want to break up with me?” he whispered, causing you to sigh. He hasn’t heard you, after all. His lips were pursed into a frown, and his eyes were squinted to show that he was very close to leaking a few tears down his cheeks, but you couldn’t read between the lines and realize what his despair meant. Hands fiddling with the hem of his shirt, he abruptly turned to you and sniffed. “You can’t do that to me. I won’t–I won’t let you do that to me.” 

You tilted your head to the side, your brows constantly furrowed. Where was he getting this idea from? You tried to recall any off-handed comments you made. Still, they were primarily directed elsewhere and never at your fake relationship. You’ve never said anything bad about him, not to him, and never behind his back. There wasn’t anything outstandingly mean to say anyway, so what sprung this on? 

Returning to reality, your head faintly shook as you looked up at Hyunjin to ask his drunken state about the reason behind this outburst. Your eyes widened instead when you saw he had taken his shirt off, the lump of fabric discarded on the floor carelessly. Heat blossomed at the base of your neck, and you felt your joints sour in panic; seriously, what sprung this on! This was a much bigger issue than drunkenness! 

When you noticed his hands reaching to the belt of his jeans, you immediately lunged toward him and circled his wrists to stop his movements. Your panic became a surprised concern at his need to strip naked in your apartment. You doubted he wanted to show you his body. Even if he did, this wasn’t how you wanted to do it. 

Moving his hands away, you urged, “No. We’re not doing that.”

“No, I have to! I have to!” 

He snatched his hands away from yours and dove to unbuckle his belt again. His movements grew increasingly frustrated the more you blocked his attempt to remove his pants. You were annoying, but he wasn’t angry at you. He was scared. He wasn’t getting what he wanted, and he thought you might leave him if he didn’t show you what he could offer. It scared him that you didn’t want to see him whole, so eventually, he began to sob. 

“I have to show you, [Name]. Please let me!” Hyunjin whined, hands tugging harshly at each other by his chest.

“You don’t have to show me anything,” you assured as you grabbed a few tissues from the tea table. You dabbled softly at his eyes. “Come on, let’s put your clothes back on.”

Tears rolled down his cheeks like knives against your skin. He felt uncomfortable at this unfamiliar sequence. Things usually go smoothly after he reveals himself. Nobody has ever refused to see him, so why did you? What about himself was so repulsive that you couldn’t take one look at his bare skin? Why didn’t you love him back? 

“No.” he slurred, then paused to catch his breath. 

The moment of calm was gone too soon. His hands reached up to ruffle his hair in a frenzy. His heart hammering against his chest, yet his brain wasn’t sane enough to understand what the sudden panic was about, just that it had something to do with you. That obliviousness, as a result, was making him even more agitated.

“You need to love me again!” he exclaimed, eyes brimming with unknown tears. “People love me when I take my clothes off. You need to love me again!” 

A puff of air slowly made its way out of your half-parted lips. You could feel the stretching of your heartstrings. Hyunjin cried as he shrank into himself, his arms going around his cold body for a sense of comfort, and the sight toyed with your head by sending waves of deep anguish like mere laps of the ocean. The feeling deranged you—to realize Hyunjin experiences such a level of hopelessness and loneliness was heartbreaking. More importantly, you felt ignorant of his problems. You should have been a better friend, perhaps even a better lover.

“Hey,” you called out gently as you scooted toward him. You brought one hand up to his face to direct his eyes to you. You smiled softly when you found that he was opening his squinted eyes to stare back. “I’m going to get something, so wait here for me, okay?”

He sniffed, tasting the tears rolling down his mouth, and nodded. You rubbed his cheek with your thumb, ever so gingerly placing a hand at the small of his back, hoping to calm him down, but it turned out Hyunjin had a thought of his own. After feeling the warmth of your hand, he took it as a sign that you wanted to hug him, so he obliged immediately by wrapping his arms around your torso and putting his head on your shoulder.

You breathed a small chuckle when he made weird noises after finding a space at the crook of your neck. The transition from him throwing a tantrum to having a mini panic attack to being the clingiest person you have ever met was amusing. As was the transition from your mind being filled with annoyance and confusion to having your feelings torn into shreds to breathing out a chuckle. It was entertaining, and the fact that Hyunjin could bring out so many different aspects of your emotions was undeniably endearing.

He was that kind of person. He has always been. More than beautiful, he was expressive, selfless, and tender-minded. Watching him allowed you to live an emotional life vicariously. All the things you ignored in the past because of mental stress were repainted in colors by his hands. The movie you never watched, the ice cream you never tried, the districts you never visited, and the fireworks show you never stayed for—everything meant something to Hyunjin, so everything meant something to you. 

To him, love was a grave of sacrifices. Of his time, his space, his body, and his mind. He was willing to give, and he has given you all except one. You wouldn’t know any of it. 

You moved to the back of the couch, cautiously pressing your back up against the edge. Hyunjin followed you, shifting his position so he lay stuffed against your chest with your arms around his shoulders. His fingers played with each other shyly on top of his bare chest as he looked around your apartment absentmindedly. He couldn’t register anything but the fabric of your clothes and how small you made him feel. 

He finally looked at you after a moment. His cries had long ceased and left only trails of dry tears on his dearest cheeks. With his eyelashes still wet, glittering beautifully in the air, he blinked, his eyes widening after he found out you had been looking down at him. Suddenly, he grinned childishly with a hint of sun hidden in his smile. “What are you looking at?”

You hummed, finding Hyunjin utterly irresistible even with his tear-stained cheeks and slurred laughter. He was all messy and puzzling, but your heart pushed against itself to give him space to stay inside. “I’m looking at you, silly.” 

“Oh, you’re looking at me.” He giggled, covering half his face with his hands and shutting his eyes shyly. He squirmed around in your arms, but not once did he move far enough to not feel you against him. When he was done, he returned back to the original position, and he peeked an eye through the gap between his fingers. He laughed. “ I am looking at you too.”

“I know you are,” you said, fingers threading through his feathery locks with serenity, and a smile so heartwarming that Hyunjin couldn’t help but focus his sight on it.

“Why?” he asked, his eyes shaky.

You pursed your lips together and shrugged. “I can’t tell you. It is a secret.”

Hyunjin’s gaze hardened naively, a gasp ripping through his throat as he leaned back against your hand. “Tell me! I promise I won’t tell anyone else.”

“You promise?” 

“I promise!” he exclaimed, sitting up slightly and bumping his forehead against your chin. He burst into a fit of giggles then, rubbing his forehead for a while before reaching the same hand out to touch your chin sloppily. “I’m sorry, I hit your face.”

“It's okay,” you said, your thumb soothing against the spot he had bumped into you. “But you promise me you can keep a secret? It’s very important!”

He nodded eagerly. “I promise!”

“Okay,” you said as you looked up at the sky, pretending to think. “The reason why I am looking at you is really simple. It is because I love you.”

You glanced back down at him to find him looking at you in astonishment. He licked his lower lip. His mind cleared a little for the first time, and he felt all of the universe that was your body pressed close to him. Beyond that, there were more minor things. Your heart beat faster than his, making him chase after you like a madman; the warmth of your skin equated to the warmth he manually cultivated in his bed by stacking multiple blankets together, an attempt to replicate your presence at night; your soft voice, going through his blurry ears, sounded like the subconscious voice he hears all the time. Maybe his subconscious was all just you.

Those were all fragments of proof of how much he loved you. To think you returned his feelings—he didn’t know what to think. 

“Really?” He sounded so surprised. It was almost heartbreaking.

“Yes,” you nodded, “even when we both have clothes on.” 

He looked down and touched your shirt. “Oh, you are wearing a shirt.”

“Yes, I am.”

He gazed at it briefly before, with an invisible shrug, leaned his cheek against your chest. “You’re warm. I like it.”

You smiled, feeling like your lips were about to extend out of your cheeks to become wider. “You’re cold because you took your shirt off!”

He scoffed and said nothing. Hyunjin was unguarded and half-stripped before you, chastely snuggling up against your chest while slurred words spilled out of his mouth like a mantra. You didn’t try to understand him; he wasn’t looking to have a conversation. You just wanted to lay together without a thought or a worry. Occasionally, he would sit up just to look at your face, then hum and lay back down, continuing to rot. 

It was such a wondrous thing.

“Do you want to wash up and go to bed?” you asked. “Are you tired?” 

“No. I want to stay here. I like it here.” 

Hyunjin let out a dreamy sigh. He threw his head back with a smile, his hair hitting your jaw and sprawled over the crook of your neck. He tilted his head then, letting it fall along your shoulder. His eyes were closed with bliss, and he laughed to himself. When he opened his eyes, there was only the shadow of your side profile, which was good for him. He wanted to kiss the skin, filled with close-up bumps and blemishes. It was a side profile he’ll know for the rest of his life, and he’ll whisper ‘I love you’ to a million times. 

“I have a secret to tell you,” he mentioned.

You raised a brow, intrigued, and urged him to continue, “What is it?”

He bit his lower lip and scurried off your body. You sat up straighter then, watching as he stumbled over to the front door for the bag he discarded on the ground. He crouched to pull a small notebook out easily before returning to you. He stopped by the couch, his eyes concentrated as he stared at the notebook's cover. Then, without another word, he dropped back onto your body and made you wrap your arms around him like before. 

“I draw you all the time. In my sketchbook.” 

He grinned out loud in the same way you would grin at him. His fingers played with the blank pages before, finally, he arrived at one filled with traces of his pencil. You gasped. He wasn’t spilling nonsense. The page was filled with beautiful sketches of your face, and so was the next one and the next. He kept flipping his notebook, and everywhere you could find pieces of yourself dotted out sincerely by his hand. 

They didn’t look to come from memories, but they were definitely from moments not even you could remember. But Hyunjin remembered everything because he detailed it all in the lines. His inability to not consume all of you tied his hands together and made you his ultimate muse. Almost unconsciously, for a while, the only thing he knew to draw was you. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t know how else to pour you out of his mind. 

It was overwhelming, and you could see that. He was showing you all his blood work: mornings spent missing you with the tip of a crooked pencil, afternoons spent recalling your features in his head, nights spent tracing your face with his lead-filled fingers under a desk lamp. If he could inhale these sketches of you into his bloodstream and poison himself with those images, leaving an organ tattoo of your presence, he would. 

“I love this one,” he said, pointing at a full-body sketch of you. “I was waiting for you at the coffee shop, and you were walking towards me. I love it. I was so excited to see you. I memorized what you wore.” 

This sketchbook stayed with him all the time; he felt like he was bringing you with him, like a kid refusing to let go of their blanket. You wouldn’t know anything about that. The beautiful boy in your arms admired you constantly, from the farthest corner of his soul to the tip of his button nose, and you wouldn’t know anything about it. 

“I draw you all the time,” he added. “I will never forget what you look like, but I always want to remember.” 

The implications of that didn’t fly over your head. His addition to telling you the truth disabled your ability to attribute the fact that he draws you in his free time to him being artistic. But more than being afraid of rejection, you feared a mutual connection. The only thing worse than you finding Hyunjin loveable was him finding that you were as well. 

“Do you know why?” he asked, looking at you expectantly. 

You wavered. You hadn’t spoken since he showed you his sketches. “Why?”

Hyunjin stared at you. Within the drunken fog of his eyes, there was earnestness. “Because I love you too.”

You didn’t know what to say, and you wouldn’t. There was solace in choosing to believe that he didn’t mean it. When tomorrow arrives, and he returns sober, you wouldn’t speak of this conversation at all. When night comes tomorrow, and he’s had a full day of rest, Hyunjin would vividly recall how you took care of him and told him you loved him, and he would draw you again. 

“Do you like them?”

His question snapped you out of your trance. Your sight blurred through a sudden quake before it focused on his face. Hyunjin pouted, his fingers tapping patiently at his notebook for your response. You softened with love and squeezed him in a hug, a smile blooming on your face. 

“I’ve never liked anything more,” you complimented, “except for you!”

His legs kicked when you nuzzled your face to the back of his neck. His heart filled, like the sun could fill up a piece of land and the moon could fill up a river, and in return for his joy, he let out a boisterous laugh. He didn’t hear how it sounded with yours. Still, it was such a wondrous thing. Your love was such a wondrous thing.

1 year ago

damn, I'm so lonely...

in rose-tinted dreams.

엔하이픈 ・ female reader + word count 400 genre fluff established relationship warnings not proof-read kissing skinship petnames — more

a/n. i’m still so sleepy ㅠㅠ

In Rose-tinted Dreams.

heeseung

would be so comfortable to cuddle; you’d be laying your head on his shoulder, an arm of yours lazily wrapped around his torso. he’d softly hum the melodies of familiar songs, absentmindedly drawing circles and patterns on your bare arm; “goodnight, love”, he’d whisper, holding you close to his body.

jongseong

would notice your gradual sleepiness, pointing out how it’s the third time you’ve slurred on your words, yawning mid-sentence; wordlessly cards his fingers through your hair, lulling you to sleep; would try to turn the lamp on the nightstand off as carefully as possible, not wanting to rouse you from your slumber. “night, babe”, he’d mumble, wrapping his arms around your waist.

jaeyun

would have a pretty delayed reaction to your tiredness; mid-way through his little ramble, he would’ve felt the weight of your head against his shoulder, eyes blinking down to gaze at your serene expression; plants a firm kiss to your forehead, softly giggling when you lightly stir in your sleep, scrunching your nose a little as you shift in your spot; “you’re so cute”, he’d mumble under his breath, breaking into a small smile at the sight.

sunghoon

would be the best cuddle buddy ever; engulfs you in a soft hug, pressing little kisses on your neck, or chin, from time to time, breath lightly fanning against your skin; gently plays with your hair, caressing the soft strands; “getting sleepy, aren’t we?” he’d ask, biting back a little chuckle at the way you snooze against his chest.

seonwoo

would absentmindedly play with your fingers, his own lightly stroking against the back of your palm; would speak in such a soft, tranquil manner, voice barely above a whisper; “baby, you can barely keep your eyes open...”, he’d point out, giggling a little when you lightly shake your head in stubborn resistance, yawning ever so quietly.

jungwon

would melt the moment he catches sight of you all bundled up in his blankets— when you’re curled up under the covers, eyes peeking out from the edges of the fluffy duvet, he can’t quite hold back a small, adoration-laced laugh; “you’re adorable”, he’d mumble, tugging you closer to his chest, his head buried in the crook of your neck.

riki

would cling onto you like a koala, limbs sprawled out over your own, his head resting against your shoulder; absentmindedly plays with your hair, lightly twirling the strands around his finger; “this is like the fifth time you’ve yawned in two minutes”, he’d say, a low giggle falling from his lips; would sneak photos of you, finding the way you’ve dozed peacefully in his arms, bundled up in heaps of blankets, adorable.

In Rose-tinted Dreams.

taglist open! @halcyoni-ki @wondipity @yjjungwon @shysakuno @niktwazny303 @vnsux @minhosify @haechansbbg @yeomha @stepout-09-15 @chansburgah @sona-verse01 @lilly-bubblelops @smouches @mrchweeee @luvistqrzzz @nwjws @ibsysbsfsunsbs @rikisly @amyysfics @mixtape-racha @berry-and-kkami @rikislady @gweoriz @czlluvriki networks! @kflixnet @enhanet @k-labels

1 year ago

⟢ — calm down. | 희승.

⟢ — Calm Down. | 희승.
⟢ — Calm Down. | 희승.
⟢ — Calm Down. | 희승.

genre: fluff

warnings: mentions of stress, kissing

requested: no

pairing: heeseung x fem!reader

milan’s note: kind of inspired by calm down by rema & selena. when i was thinking abt this fic i was thinking abt that song (made this fic for u guys but a lil for me cause im a bit stressed myself)

heeseung always took good care of you. especially the times you were stressed and today just so happened to be one of those times. he knew that everything you had going on was a lot on you even when you tried to hide it or mask your real emotions with a smile and an ‘it’s fine’.

he didn’t need much of an explanation from you in words but could always tell from your body language. how your shoulders were higher and more tense. the way you’d stop eating and/or drinking normally. even how much more you stared off in to space when he was talking.

he knew it all. which is why even after he came home prepared for cuddles and a relaxed night, he decided to take you out.

this landed you at the nearest park by your shared apartment. you both walked side by side up to a steep hill where you could see the sun setting behind the nearly bare trees. his arm was tucked tightly around you, pulling you into him every time you took a step. he pressed kisses on your temple, whispering ‘I love you’s’ and how much he cared about you.

once you got to the edge of the hill, you stood with your hands shoved in the pockets of your coat, looking out at the setting sun. heeseung moved to stand behind you, arms wrapping around your torso as he placed more kisses to your temple and cheek. he nuzzled his reddish nose against the side of your neck.

“you mean the world to me, you know that?” he mumbled close to your ear. you nodded at his comment, knowing he was about to go into one of his mini speeches that he always gave you when you tried to hide your feelings from him.

“i don’t want you to ever feel like you have to hide the fact that you’re simply tired or overwhelmed. i wanna be there to take care of you when you can’t calm down.” he said, the last part referring to when you cried in his arms before you both left for a walk. your eyes still slightly red after the sobbing fest.

you sniffled, nodding once more. he continued to talk to you, making you promise to talk to him more. after the sun had mostly gone down, you turned around with heeseung’s arms still wrapped around your waist. your slightly warm hands came up to his pink cheeks, pulling him down to meet you halfway with a gentle, but deep kiss.

your lips moved in sync for a bit, his grip on you tightening. his eyebrows furrowed as he deepened the kiss, putting all his love for you into one smooch.

you both pulled away slowly, resting your foreheads against each other’s but not before leaving one more peck on his lips.

“i’ll always be here for you, sweet girl.”

⟢ — Calm Down. | 희승.

⟢ milan’s notes: hope u guys enjoyed :)

taglist: @haechansbbg @contyynishimura (message or comment to be added)

© KAIROOT 2023

1 year ago

you were brushing through your freshly washed hair when you heard soft footsteps coming from outside the bathroom. the door opened and minho came inside, immediately latching his half-asleep figure to your body from behind. “what are you doing?” he mumbled quietly in the crook of your neck. “i just got up to wash my hair, i had to finally get rid of this castor oil. but look, aren’t they smoother now?” you touched your damp hair with a smile, but minho only grumbled and you noticed in the mirror that his eyes were completely closed. “why didn’t you tell me you were going to the bathroom?” he asked and it confused you. “why would i tell you? you were sleeping, i wouldn’t want to wake you up anyway,” you said, pouting. was he mad that you got up without him knowing? minho nuzzled his face even more in your neck, breathing your soft scent. “so i could come here with you and hug you like i am now.” you cooed at his response, smiling ever so fondly. minho came up as someone cold and uninterested, but this was only the impression when someone didn’t know him as well as you did. you knew he was clingy and in constant need of attention from you. sometimes you felt like you had a little koala instead of a boyfriend, but you didn’t mind the slightest. “i’m sorry, honey. i’ll make sure to wake you up next time, okay?” you said, your voice barely above the whisper, and minho let out a small “mhm”, placing the tiniest kiss right behind your ear. “i’d like that. but now please hurry up or i’ll die. i’m still really tired,” he whined and you giggled at that. “yes, sir,” you saluted jokingly, grinning. you grabbed your hairbrush, quickly untangling the rest of your hair, and in a short moment you were able to guide your sleepy, koala-like boyfriend back to your bedroom, letting him cling to you and fall asleep, probably to dream of you.

You Were Brushing Through Your Freshly Washed Hair When You Heard Soft Footsteps Coming From Outside

wrote it in one go before my lectures, please bear with me as usual

taglist !

@lynlyndoll @iyenbread @flooo71 @skz-streamer @inniescandy-01 @hannahhbahng @prettymiye0n @ggsez31 @laylasbunbunny @like-a-diamondinthesky @axel-skz @kittymaryam-skz @l3visbby

1 year ago
© 히니피앙★★★★★ | Do Not Edit And/or Crop Logo
© 히니피앙★★★★★ | Do Not Edit And/or Crop Logo
© 히니피앙★★★★★ | Do Not Edit And/or Crop Logo

© 히니피앙★★★★★ | do not edit and/or crop logo

1 year ago
Talk Tomorrow — Lee Heeseung. Best Friends To Lovers. Drunken Confessions. Fluff. (1.1k Words)

talk tomorrow — lee heeseung. best friends to lovers. drunken confessions. fluff. (1.1k words)

Talk Tomorrow — Lee Heeseung. Best Friends To Lovers. Drunken Confessions. Fluff. (1.1k Words)

It takes a single message from Jay reading “Heeseung drunk. Please help” for you to leave the comfort of your bed in favor of picking up your best friend.

He’d told you the night prior that he’d be drinking out with his friends, even asked you to come with him. However, you were a prisoner to your 10-page essay due at midnight so you’d opted out of his invitation – despite his accompanying doe-eyes, pout, and whining. He had taken everything out of his books of “How To Get (Name) To Say Yes” for you to reconsider, but you’d kept a firm stand on wanting to pass your subject.

Though, at 2am, with your essay—not proofread— passed and sent into the void for you to never look at ever again, you had no choice but to get the boy before he makes stupid decisions that’d have him be subject to his friends’ teasing the next day. If Jay’s one text message hadn’t convinced you, Jake’s drunk phone call with Heeseung mumbling your name over and over again would’ve done the trick.

So, clad in pajamas you had every intent on sleeping in, you’re left walking a few minutes away from his destination until you could smell the familiar scent of hard liquor. It doesn’t take a minute of you announcing you’d arrived before Heeseung barges out of the club doors to stumble his way to you and take you in his arms, just like in the movies, back slouched and head draped on your shoulder.

Though, the movies never described how foul alcohol would smell like on a boy’s sweaty body. It made you freak out, along with the thought of the connotations of a drunken boy who could pull whoever he wanted. Had he met a pretty girl?

Had it been Jake, you wouldn’t have minded. You’d even go as far as saying you’d help him, but Heeseung is a different case. Different in that you’re madly in love with him, and you could only ever see Jake as a brother figure.

“(Name)? Is it actually you?” His words come out in a slur, but you don’t miss the tilt of sudden giddiness in the way that he speaks to you.

“He’s been whining about you all night.” Jay’s voice follows from right behind him, peeling the drunk boy away from you who instantly makes grabby hands and lunges right back when Jay lets go. You could hear Heeseung mumbling, “don’t tell her”, against your shoulder.

“Don’t tell me what?” You try to support Heeseung’s wait on you, looking from him to Jay who simply shrugs his shoulders in response. Jake is a compliant drunk at the back with his eyes curtained and hands behind his back so Jay doesn’t scold him.

“That I like you.” He murmurs, low rasp in his voice and arms tightening around you as if to prepare you for the words you had never expected to hear from the boy. You would’ve stumbled in your step had Heeseung not depended most of his weight on you.

Jake’s mouth drops.

“Oh my god. He actually said it.” You could hear Jake’s harsh whispers that Jay desperately tries to shut down, dragging his friend back into the building despite his attempts at trying to see the scene unfold before him.

The door closes, and it’s just you, Heeseung, and the faint music playing from the club.

“Do you actually mean that?” You ask more to yourself, sudden bomb dropped. Apparently, it does not take seconds to comprehend that the boy you’d been in love with since middle school bears the same feelings for you. So, you stand there looking like an idiot with Heeseung stuck to you like his life depends on it.

“Of course I do.” His head perks up, defensive almost, peeling away from you. “Have you not— have you not noticed the way I look at you? How I have all your favorite books memorized, how I know everything about you by heart? I like you so much, (Name). I like you so much that sometimes it feels like I can’t breathe because what is my heart for if not to love you?”

“Hee—”

“How could anyone not love you? You walk into a room, and everyone is captivated by you. Magic is everywhere with you, and I just want to be able to have even just a fraction of who you are. But I could never tell you that. I’m just… I’m just your best friend, right? How could I be anything more?”

His eyes are glossy, and fixated on your lips before he curses himself. “I’m sorry. Are you mad at me?”

“Hee, of course I’m not mad at you. But, can we talk about this tomorrow? I don’t want you to say things you don’t mean.”

“But I do mean everything, baby. And I’ll—” Hiccup. “I’ll say everything again tomorrow, anything you want for you to believe me.”

“Come on, let’s go home. We’ll talk more about this in the morning, okay?”

“Okay.”

“You’re gonna have a really bad headache tomorrow.”

“Hmm… I heard kisses are a good remedy.”

“Really, now?”

“Mhm.”

His hand dives after yours, walking with you to your apartment minutes away. Your heart flutters in the space between your intertwined fingers. He holds onto you like he knows nothing else. It only makes you smile more.

He’ll settle for handholding tonight.

“Did you have fun tonight?”

“Mmm, couldn’t stop thinking about you though. It’s always more fun with you.” Heeseung doesn’t even think of what he’s saying anymore, spewing unfiltered words he’d normally keep hidden until he was sure you felt the same. Maybe it’s because his mind is too busy reeling what it’d be like to be with you, and how your lips could possibly feel like on his.

“Hee.” You warn light-heartedly.

“Okay, tomorrow, tomorrow. We’ll talk about this tomorrow.” He repeats like a mantra before sighing out. “Want time to hurry. Wanna know if you feel the same way.”

Heeseung looks lost in his own body when you arrive back into your apartment, but he still has everything memorized—where to take his shoes off, where to sit as you hand him a glass of water to drink, where his spare clothes are.

Your chest feels warm the whole time you help him wash his face. He simply sits there, compliant and behaved which is not how he’s like on a day to day basis, as you run your hands through his face, even after you dry him off with a towel. Heeseung is only a boy with a mind thinking if his everydays could look like this.

He falls asleep after 15 minutes, but his hand never leaves yours, and there’s a little note on your bedtime with lines you could barely recognize as Heeseung’s handwriting.

I meant everything. Talk tomorrow.

1 year ago

*/punches the wall

⋅ GENRES: Established Relationship; Fluff

⋅ GENRES: established relationship; fluff

⋅ PAIRING: Jaeyun x fem!reader

⋅ WORD COUNT: 0.8K

⋅ WARNINGS: established relationship with Jake? late nights with him? slow dancing with him?! it’s all valid warnings if you ask me, but the real warnings are mentions of alcohol; slightly suggestive content

⋅ GENRES: Established Relationship; Fluff

Jake wasn’t the type of boyfriend to buy expensive bouquets or take you to fancy restaurants.

No — he was the type of boyfriend to pick flowers on the sidewalk for you and order food past midnight. He placed blankets on the hardwood floor of your living room and made picnics on it. The whispered lyrics of a love song and your laughter being the only furor in the middle of the sleeping city. And when the bowls were empty, and the wine sank in, he was the type of boyfriend to ask you to dance with him.

Barefoot and clumsy, Jake loved to dance with you.

⋅ GENRES: Established Relationship; Fluff

The night had fallen into those silent hours when no one could tell if it was really late or really early. The gentle breeze streaming through the open windows of your living room being the only sound resonating with Jake’s chosen playlist — and his laughter.

You weren’t sure if you had intended to be funny. You knew you were talking about something, trailing a long line of thoughts but you stopped at the sound of him, allowing everything to slip and slide away with a single hitch of breath.

You loved the way Jake laughed. You loved the way he always tilted his head back, his nose wrinkling, and his eyes closing. His whole body always poured his emotions because it was the only way Jake knew how to be — too pure and too intense.

The echoes of his laugh were still on his lips as he straightened himself back to look at you, coming to you with a soft smile. Shafts of golden luminescence reached for him, embellishing his face, turning the dark brown of his eyes into a gentle amber. He was all shades of gold, reflections of the city lights and the dim flames of the candles you had lit some moment at the beginning of the night.

Jake took your hand in his, thumb caressing the inside of your wrist before he brought it to his lips and kissed it. The overwhelming affection of the gesture caused your heart to beat a little faster, and although you could see the tip of his ears turning a bit rosy, Jake smirked against your skin.

“Dance with me?” he whispered.

It was a rite, even though you both knew you would never deny him, Jake always waited, and only when you nodded at him, he curled his fingers on yours, bringing you up and closer to him.

One of his hands found the small of your back, and your whole body hummed. It wasn’t anything new. Jake had explored your body far more than anyone ever could, but still, there was something so overwhelming about being touched by him — about being loved by him.

Your bare feet made no sound as he suddenly spun you through the hardwood floor, the button shirt you had stolen from him swirling dangerously around your thighs until he decided to bring you back to him.

You pulled your arms around his shoulders, and Jake laughed once again. It was your favorite standing and he knew it. He embraced your waist with his both arms, lending in just enough for you to hide your face under his chin.

Jake smelled like honeysuckle, like oranges and citrus groves in the sun. He was a piece of summer no other season could ever take away and you longed for his warmth.

“I like this song,” he said. It sounded like a statement to nobody, but then, he placed his lips against your ear, and the lyrics threaded through your hair as if the only thing he ever wanted was for you to know it.

It was nothing extravagant, his voice came a bit low and timid, but it spread a warm feeling through your chest.

“It took your love to make my heart come alive,” Jake sang. “Cause’ I lived my life believing all love is blind.”

“But everything about you is telling me this time it’s forever, this time I know and there’s no doubt in my mind.”

Your fingers curled on the hair at his nape, and Jake shivered beneath your touch, the soft rustle of his breath hitching against your ear before he failed to sing the next lyrics, but he didn’t need to — you already knew them.

You always knew them.

Forever, until my life is through. Girl, I’ll be loving you forever.

The romantic chords kept going, but Jake stopped, drawing back just enough for his eyes to search yours. It was adorable the way he smiled, boyish and eyes glittering in the low light. A mischief that matched the way he kissed you.

Jake wasn’t the type of boyfriend to buy expensive bouquets or take you to fancy restaurants.

No — he was the type of boyfriend to pick flowers on the sidewalk for you and order food past midnight. He danced with you, barefoot and clumsy, in the middle of your living room, and this was how you had found forever.

1 year ago

*/sobs

Recharging Kisses - Lee Minho

Recharging Kisses - Lee Minho
Recharging Kisses - Lee Minho
Recharging Kisses - Lee Minho

Pairing: Lee Minho x gn!reader

Genre: fluffy

Summary: minho needs some extra loving as he has been preparing his comeback

Word Count: 804

Warning: n/a

Recharging Kisses - Lee Minho

Comeback season can be pretty tough for Minho. The constant late night dancing sessions, recording and re-recording schedules, days long music video shooting, and schedules upon schedules upon schedules. There was a routine for these hectic days. Wake up at 7AM, have a busy day, and come back around midnight or 1AM. He wishes this season of time was less busy, but in order for everything to be perfect, it had to go this way.

He can’t help but feel bad for his poor fiance at home who barely sees him. All he hears them say is, “Have a good day at work… Let’s get you to bed… I love you, goodnight bubs.” He felt like such a bad partner who can’t be home for his lover. 

Thankfully, today was finally a day where the only thing they had to do was interviews. However, by the end of the day, Minho is drained. The constant same questions, being in the same room all day, only moving to change seating positions, go to the bathroom, or have a quick bite to eat. With it just being interviews, he is actually able to come home for dinner for once.

Minho enters his shared apartment to smell an amazing home cooked meal. He instantly scans his eyes over to the kitchen to see you jamming out to your music while cooking. A slight smirk creeps on his face. He loves to see you happy. He quietly sets down his backpack and takes off his shoes. With soft steps, he creeps up behind you. He looks over your shoulder to see what you were cooking: spicy chicken with rice and kimchi. A simple yet comforting meal. He then carefully wraps his arms around your waist. This causes you to slightly jump since you didn’t know he was home yet. “You scared me a little,” you chuckle. 

“Sorry,” Minho mutters into your neck. Your heart flutters at the affection you have been missing. 

“Aw, it’s okay,” you smile. You set down the fork and knife that was in your hand to turn around to face your partner. You snake your arms around his shoulders to give him a nice, warm hug. “Welcome home, my love.” 

You play with the ends of his hair. You know how hard he has been working lately. You feel so proud of him, yet you also feel so bad for everything he has to do to prepare for a new comeback. He loves his job, and you know that. But sometimes you can’t help but think every now and then that it’s too much for someone to handle. 

Before wanting to turn back to finish plating his meal, you place a sweet, soft kiss on his cheek. You go to turn around, but the arms around you tighten. You smile at Minho’s clinginess. Your lips meet his cheek again before attempting to continue what you were doing. “One percent,” Mihno sighs.

Giggles escape your throat at Mihno’s words. “What?” 

“I’m at one percent,” he says, taping his cheek. You roll your eyes and peck his cheek a few more times. “Hmm, three percent.” 

“Minho!” you giggle into his neck. 

“What? I had a long day, and I need recharging. Only your kisses can recharge me!” he exclaims. 

You smirk at his explanation. You love this side of him. He rarely admits that he needs some love to feel better. He normally likes to play a guessing game where you have to figure out what he wants because he won’t say it. Since he is so tired, he is vulnerable to saying what he wants. 

“Whatever you say, bubs,” you say before peppering his cheek with more kisses. Your lips move all around his face: his cheeks, forehead, nose, jaw, neck, everywhere but his lips. 

You look at Minho to see  a smile plastered on his face, “Hmm, 75%. I am almost at full battery.” 

“I think I have an idea to get you to 100%,” you say. 

“And how are you going to do that?” 

“Close your eyes and find out.”

He follows your instructions to close his eyes. Once his lids are shut, you delicately place your lips onto his. Your hands cup his cheeks to bring him a little closer as if he wasn’t already close enough. Light kisses like this show the love you have for each other. They are pure. It makes both of your hearts flutter with love. These kisses had all kinds of different meanings. Some kisses were saying ‘I love you’. Some were saying ‘I’m sorry, but I’m here now.’ Some were saying ‘Thank you.’ Words he has a hard time expressing sometimes, but you can feel them in his kisses. 

After several kisses, he pulls away to kiss your cheek. A final ‘Thank you’. 

“100% completed.” 

1 year ago

sigh */punches wall

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀・908 / 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴・hyunjin X Gn!reader / 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲(𝘀)・domestic

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀・908 / 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴・hyunjin x gn!reader / 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲(𝘀)・domestic fluff, established relationship, being hopelessly whipped for one another hehe

𝟭𝟭:𝟯𝟲 𝗣.𝗠. — Hwang Hyunjin is no stranger to compliments.

How couldn’t he be, when his grip on every stadium is one of titanium, when he looks and sounds like a figment of a sweet dream, when he is all that he is? And he loves the flattery. He’ll bow graciously and utter his thanks, his head lowered just far enough to conceal the smirk on his lips that says: oh, I know.

But it’s different with you. Maybe it’s because he’s clung to everything you’ve said to him since the day you met, curating a mental archive of the greatest love he'll ever know. Maybe it’s because he feels the urge to smile just looking at your face. Maybe he's that much of an enamored idiot that your praise makes him feel like he’s touching the sky.

Whatever the reason, your compliments destroy him, and tonight is no exception.

Hyunjin’s head is hovering over the sink, headband holding back his hair, hands slathering cleanser over his skin, when his phone goes off. It’s unusual for him to receive emails so late, and he rinses and dries himself with a touch of irritation. Surely it can wait until tomorrow. But the annoyance subsides when Hyunjin starts to read: photos came out early . . . congratulations again . . . will be in touch with next steps.

Behind him, the bathroom door opens, and in walks a figure with tired eyes and a matching headband over their hairline. Hyunjin feels arms circle around his waist and a familiar warmth press up against his back. “I ran out of face soap,” you mumble.

Without looking up from his screen, Hyunjin picks up his cleanser and holds it by his hip, so that you only need extend your fingers to snatch it away. You place a kiss on his cheek as a quick way of thanks, bringing a small, helpless smile to his face.

The next few minutes are spent in silence, save for the sounds of your washing. It isn’t until you glance in the mirror and see your boyfriend’s fascination with his phone that you notice something’s up.

“What’re you looking at?” You hum, curious.

Hyunjin’s reply is casual. Too casual. “The photos from the Versace shoot came out early.”

At this, you whip around to look at him. Your face is illuminated with a smile that stretches from ear to ear, the fatigue in your eyes replaced with pure anticipation. A mysterious warmth begins to spread through Hyunjin, starting in his chest and traveling as far as his cheeks, dusting them pink with embarrassment. (And so Hyunjin’s destruction begins.)

“Show me,” you demand.

Hyunjin tilts his screen in your direction, finally unable to quell the proud grin that he’s been biting back for so long. You nestle into his side and wrap your hands around his tricep, as if looking to hang onto something for emotional support, but nothing could've prepared you for what you see: silky dark hair pinned back by a pair of white sunglasses, facial features so ethereal that they rival the sculptures of Michelangelo himself, jewelry and suit jacket dull in comparison to his golden complexion, all rearranged into poses and expressions so confident and effortless that one would think he’s been doing this for years.

It is too much for you.

The noise that comes out of your mouth is terrifying—a mixture of a moan and a gasp except you’re being mauled by a mountain lion, or something—and Hyunjin starts to laugh, the forceful, involuntary kind that seizes his entire being.

“Are you kidding me?" You let go of his arm to grab hold of his phone with both hands, bringing it within inches of your face. "Is this real life?”

“What sound did you just make—?" Hyunjin is now sliding down the wall, barely able to get his words out. "Wait, I can’t breathe, stop—”

You ignore him, and Hyunjin genuinely thinks he’s going to dissolve when he sees that you’ve zoomed in far enough for his face, just his face, to take up the entire screen. “This can’t be real,” you mutter. “You can’t be real.”

“Shut up, you idiot—”

Hyunjin suddenly feels a pair of hands on his cheeks, and you start littering kisses all over his face, first on his forehead, then his temple, then his nose, his jaw, weaving words in between to form a sentence: you are the most beautiful man in the whole world, Hwang Hyunjin. He disappears into a new fit of laughter, his cheeks sore from how hard he’s beaming, his ears burning crimson. He feels like he might burst, he’s so happy, so in love.

You then pull away for a breather, and whatever plea for mercy Hyunjin has prepared goes forgotten when it occurs to him how close the two of you are, with you basically straddling him and wisps of your hair tickling his face. And you look stunning right now, barefaced and blushing and radiant. His laughter dissipates at last, leaving behind only a helplessly fond smile that turns his eyes to crescents.

“My prince,” you whisper, bumping your nose lightly against his. “Mine.”

He physically cannot go a second longer without kissing you, leaning in and sealing his grin against yours with the intensity of an oath. Yours. Forever.

“Thank you, baby."

(The truth is that Hyunjin destroys you first. It is only natural that you return the favor.)

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀・908 / 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴・hyunjin X Gn!reader / 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲(𝘀)・domestic

𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸? please consider reblogging, commenting, or sending me an ask to let me know; or, read my other writing here. thanks so much for the support ♡

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀・908 / 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴・hyunjin X Gn!reader / 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲(𝘀)・domestic

© 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗹𝗶𝘅 (est. 090323) · all works are pieces of original writing and all characters and relationships are purely fictional. please do not repost or reuse for any reason.

1 year ago

sigh */cries myself to sleep

someday

Someday
Someday
Someday

pairings: teacher!jake x single mom!reader

summary: Being a single mom to a 6 year old daughter isn’t always easy, and it doesn’t help that her class teacher awakens feelings inside of you, you haven’t felt in a long time. Will the love between you blossom, or will your complicated life drive you apart?

words: 11.6k

story colour: green

warnings: one heavy (?) make out session and a lot of tension

masterlist of ‘enhypen as jobs’

Life can change.

From one second to another, everything can change. Everything you have once known to be normal, everything you were used to. It all can get ripped away from you in the matter of a few seconds.

From one second to another a seventeen-year-old girl finds out she got pregnant from a boy that wasn’t ready to commit to a life like that yet and parents that felt nothing but disappointment towards their teenage daughter.

From one second to another this girl had to move away, raise a child on her own and build a life save for them to live in. She had to find a job with a steady income, find people who could help her and put all her needs aside for the small bundle of life she brought into the world.

Not only did she have to change her life, but she also had to rebuild it. She had to create a new, healthier and secure one. Suddenly it wasn’t about what outfit to wear to school, how to sneak out to go to a party or new drama that happened at school. It was about changing diapers, sleepless nights caused by a toothing child and soothing countless emotional outbreaks. It was about raising her child, teaching kindness and blaming every bad thing on herself.

But at the end of the day, it was being grateful, loving the child unconditionally and not being able to imagine her life any different. It was feeling purpose, feeling needed and feeling loved. It was showing exactly that love to her child and never letting her forget that.

♡❀˖⁺. ༶ ⋆˙⊹❀♡

Listening to the waves crashing against the shore, you soak in the last moments of this morning, the soft rays of sun on your face, the slight breeze making your cheeks rosy and the faint sound of birds chirping somewhere close by. You soak in this moment, because moments like this are rare in the life you’re living, quiet and undisturbed, protected from all the daily stress and complications.

You breathe in the air one last time, before you see someone approaching you out of the corner of your eye.

“Look mommy, I found a pretty shell.”, your 6-year-old daughter Nuri says as she holds her hand out for you to see. You show her a bright smile, admiring the pretty shell in her hands. Your daughter has always been a collector, shells, flowers, rocks, even leaves, nothing is safe from her. And it’s something you love about her. How she sees the beauty in the small things, always so eager to show you the new things she discovered, with her big bright eyes.

“It’s so pretty, Nuri. How about you put it into your bag and later we will get the other shells you collected and make a pretty necklace out of them?” You watch as the little girl enthusiastically nods, putting the shell carefully into her bag, before sitting down beside you on the blanket you laid over the sand.

“Are you excited about starting school today?”, you ask your daughter, as you gently pull her onto your lap, stroking her hair with one of your hands. Whenever you look at her, you get stunned by how much you see your younger self in her. The more she grows, the more the resemblance grows. But you also realize how awfully fast time passes, and how much has changed since the day you held your little baby in your arms for the first time.

“I am.”, Nuri says, her big eyes almost disappearing as she grins widely at you, showing off her missing front tooth. “But I will also miss kindergarten a lot. And I will miss you too, mommy.”

In an instant, tears fill up your eyes and it takes you a moment to swallow them down, not wanting Nuri to see you like that. You could cry after you dropped her off at school, but for now, those tears will have to stay hidden. “I will miss you too, sweet girl. But it is just a few hours that we don’t see each other. Every day after school I will pick you up and we can do whatever we want to do, okay?”

Nuri nods her head again, before wrapping her arms around you, pulling you into a tight hug. “Do you think I will make any friends?”

“Of course, you will.”, you tell her, truthfully. Your daughter, in contrary to you, never had problems talking to others. She is a social butterfly, making friends wherever she goes. You admire her for that, wanting to have the same trait. Because while she plays with all the kids in the playground, you can only watch the other mothers sit together, talking about everything and nothing. Part of you wants to just go up to them, ask them if you could join them, but the other part of you feels anxious, scared of getting judged, the way you always do. Being a mom so young has only brought you trouble, wherever you go. And while Nuri is the best thing that has happened to you, others seem to not support that opinion.

If you got a dollar for every time someone told you that you would destroy your kids future, or that you are way too young to have this kind of responsibility, you would be rich by now. Everywhere you go, if it’s grocery shopping, getting gas, at restaurants, people try to give you advice or comment on the things that apparently went wrong with your life, without even knowing you or your story. You heard everything, from your parents not raising you right or having daddy issues because your dad left you when you were young, to being whore that slept around until she eventually got pregnant.

But they don’t know that it was just a simple accident. That it was two teenagers having their first times together, being nervous and not really knowing what to do. It was two teenagers who didn’t think and had to deal with the consequences of their moment together. Well, at least one did. It wasn’t your parents’ fault; it wasn’t you sleeping around. It was just something that happened, unplanned but not unwanted.

And they don’t know that ever since Nuri came into your life, everything felt like it had a purpose. You felt like you had a purpose. Being a mother has made you find out who you truly are, and what you truly want. It made you more aware of the process of growing up, and made you realize all the stupid things you did as a teenager. It helped you through the hardest times and gave you something to hold on to, a reason to fight. Nuri is the reason you wake up every day, the reason you can get out of bed and the reason you finally have a routine in your life.

And you truly believe that it was meant to happen. You were meant to get pregnant with her and build up a life for the both of you.

“If someone will make a lot of friends, it’s you. I just know that everyone will love you, just how I know that I love you, so so much.”

-

It’s a weird feeling, picking your daughter up from her first day of school. You watch all the kids run up to their parents, excited little faces, already going on and on about everything that happened while they spend a few hours apart.

And while you’re waiting for your daughter to exit the school, you realize you can’t wait to be with her again, to hear her tell all the stories about her experiences on her first day, to get ice cream with her and make necklaces and bracelets. You realize that this must be harder for you than for her. She doesn’t realize the quickness in which she grows up, but you do.

It feels like yesterday when she was still in your belly. It feels like yesterday when she took her first steps, falling face first to the ground. It feels like yesterday when she said her first words, going up to every stranger in the grocery store and proudly repeating that word to them. It feels like yesterday when she lost her favorite toy and cried for two days straight. When you threw a little goodbye party for that toy with her and explained to her that maybe another child found her toy and gave it a new home, only to find the toy four days later under your bed. And it feels like yesterday when she came into your room, telling you she had a nightmare. She crawled into your bed and shortly before sleep took over, she whispered that you are the best mommy in the whole world.

All these memories start crashing over you, one by one. Tears fill your eyes yet again, and it takes everything in you to blink them away, not wanting to break down in front of all these strangers.

“Mommy.”, you hear her voice before you see her. Turning in the direction of the voice, you see your daughter running up to you, her arms wide open. You kneel down, opening your arms yourself and a bright smile lighting up all your features.

“Hey, my sweet girl.”, you say as you wrap her tightly into your arms. All the sadness you felt a moment ago washes away the moment you relish in the feeling of having the most important person in your life in your arms. “How was your first day?”

“It was so amazing, mommy. We learned a new song and ate a lot of fruits together. I made a lot of friends, and all my teachers are so nice.” You can’t help but smile brightly at the excitement of your daughter. “Do we have some time before we go home? I want you to meet my teacher. He is still in the classroom, so we have to hurry.”

Before you can answer, Nuri already takes off with your hand in hers, leading you inside the school and to her classroom. You marvel at all the colorful decoration, the helpful quotes and the artistic pictures. “Hello, Mr. Sim.”, your daughter says, excitedly waving at her teacher.

You take another step into the classroom, looking for the man that is busy packing his bag. But when he turns around and shows your daughter a bright smile, it almost takes your breath away. You never expected a teacher to look this… gorgeous. Mr. Sim looks young, your age probably, his skin is soft and glowing, his eyes a deep shade of brown and his black hair framing his perfect face. He has full, pink lips and a smile so bright, it resembles a puppy.

“Hey, Nuri. What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be on your way home?” Even his voice sounds like it was dipped into honey and laced with cream and sprinkles. It does something to you, you haven’t felt in a really long time.

“I wanted you to meet my mommy.”, she says, pointing over at you. And the moment Mr. Sim’s eyes meet you, you can feel something in the air change. A uncuttable tension fills the room, and you can’t stop staring at him. You can’t stop looking at his perfect face and his perfect eyes and his perfect lips. You feel ashamed for feeling this way, for thinking about your daughter’s teacher that way, but you can’t help yourself. “Mr. Sim this is my mommy.”

“Hi.”, he says, his voice breaking with this simple word. “I’m Mr. Sim, but you can call me Jake.” Jake wipes his hand on his pants before reaching it out for you to take, which you do. Gently you place your hand in his, giving it a soft shake, almost sighing at the feeling of this small contact. Jake has big hands, long fingers and veins traveling up his arms, but his skin is so soft and smooth it almost doesn’t seem fair.

“I’m Y/N, Nuri’s mom.” You almost punch yourself for sounding so weak and pathetic. The last thing you want is for Nuri’s teacher to know what an effect his mere presence has on you. “Are you Nuri’s class teacher?”

“For now, yeah. I’m a substitute teacher since their actual teacher got into an accident and has to rest for probably a few months. I was meant to start at another school but got transferred here last minute.” You could listen to him speak for hours. “But you probably don’t care about that.” He chuckles softly, letting a hand nervously glide through his silky hair. “What you probably do care about is that we have a parents’ conference next week. I wanted to send an e-mail to every parent, but you know, seeing as you are here, I just wanted to let you know beforehand.”

You nod at him, showing him a small appreciative smile. “Thank you, Jake. I will see what I can do to come. Maybe someone will have the time to look after Nuri for a few hours.”

Jake nods one time, then another, before letting his hand fall to his side. “It’s a pretty important conference, seeing that this has a lot of information about the first school year. Maybe her father can look after her, so you can come.” You can hear the lingering note in his sentence, subconsciously knowing that he’s testing the waters.

“Nuri’s father is not in her life.”, you say, looking down at your daughter who only smiles up at you. “It’s just us, right, sweet pee?”

“Yep.”, she says, nodding her head a few times. “Our house is a girls’ only zone.” Jake chuckles at the words of the little girl in front of him. He reaches into the pocket of his jeans and takes out his phone to hand it to you.

“You can see if you find someone to look after her for a few hours and if not, you can just text me and we will find a solution. Is that okay with you?” Stunned, you take his phone, seeing his contact list already open.

“Yeah, yeah of course. Thank you so much, Mr. Sim.”

“Jake.”, he tells you again, a gentle smile resting on his lips. “You can just call me Jake, okay?”

-

“God, it was so embarrassing.”, Jake says as he drinks a sip from his coke. “I kept on rambling and stuttering. Like my hands got all sweaty and I couldn’t even really look her in the eyes.”

He hears his friends laughing at him to which he just frowns. Jake knows the way he acted around you, his student’s mom, wasn’t appropriate, but it was like the moment he saw you his brain stopped working. All the blood rushed out of it, leaving him stupid and unable to form thought through sentences. It was like he was sixteen all over again. A teenager nervous around pretty girls, unable to talk to them without making a foul out of himself.

“Dude, you seem down bad for her.”, Jay, his friend, says, not being able to hide the amusement in his voice. It’s been a while since the boys heard any stories about women in Jake’s life. Jake always tried to keep in love life as clear as possible, only looking for something serious and whenever he noticed the other person wasn’t reciprocating the same feeling, he ended whatever it was between him and the other person. Ever since Jake was young, he had one wish and that was to be in love. To love unconditionally, find someone who feels the same way and spend the rest of his life with them. To marry, have kids and grow old together. That’s what Jake always wanted, and still does to this day. But finding someone with the same wish turned out to be harder than he thought it would.

“But doesn’t she have a kid? Doesn’t that mean she has a husband, or boyfriend?”, Sunghoon asks, joining in on the conversation.

Jake just shakes his head, sighing as he lets his free hand nervously glide through his hair. “No, I already asked her. It’s apparently just her and her daughter. But I don’t know where the father is, didn’t think it would be appropriate to ask her that.”

“Wait. You asked her about a man in her life?”, Heesungs’ eyes are wide, and he has to swallow the laugh that threatens to leave his lips. “Bro, there is no way, you had the balls to do that. She definitely knows that you are interested in her.”

“What?”, Jake exclaims, bewilderedly looking at his friends. “What do you mean she knows I am interested in her?”

“Bro, you asked if she has a boyfriend or not, that’s the first sign of testing the waters, checking if she’s single. Everyone knows that and I bet she does too.”

Jake lets his head fall into his hands, a frustrated sigh leaving his lips. “She probably thinks I am a weirdo. God, what if she doesn’t want her child to be in a class with a teacher that was shamelessly hitting on her? What if she tells the other parents and I’m going to get kicked out of that school?”

“Jake.”, Sunghoon puts a comforting hand on his friend’s shoulder. “I doubt she would do that. And come on, maybe she is interested in you as well. Look at you, you are an attractive man. Don’t overthink this whole thing, okay?”

-

“And they lived happier ever after. The end.”, you finish reading the bedtime story for Nuri, closing the book and putting it on her nightstand.

“Mommy?”, you hear her quiet voice asking for you. Immediately, you take her hand, showing her a soft smile. She looks so small with her eyes just half open, tiredness written all over her face.

“Yes, sweety?”

“Do you like Mr. Sim?” The question surprises you, makes you take a few deep breaths before feeling ready to answer.

“I think he is a lovely person. He seems very sweet to you. Why do you ask that?”

Nuri adjusts her position, trying to open her eyes more to look at you clearly. “I think you are in love with him. Mrs. Kim said that when someone is in love with another person, they get very nervous and start stuttering in their sentences. She told me that you can’t stop looking at the person and that you seem kind of starstruck. Just like the way I look at ice cream.” She hugs her little teddy bear closer to her chest before continuing. “That’s how you looked today when you looked at Mr. Sim.”

You can’t help but shake your head as you hear the words your elderly neighbor has told your daughter. But it shouldn’t surprise you. Mrs. Kim has always been a hopeless romantic, going on and on about how you will find the right guy for you, that you just have to be patient. She has been watching over Nuri ever since she was a little baby, and it was bound to happen that at some point she would fill your daughter’s head with this nonsense.

“I am not in love with Mr. Sim, baby. I don’t even know him.”

“But you could get to know him. And then you will fall in love with him and live happily ever after with him, just like in the stories you read me every night.” You can hear something underlying in your daughter’s voice. Something she hides as she speaks those words.

“Nuri, why do you want me to fall in love with Mr. Sim?”, you ask her, squeezing her hand softly. You can see the sadness forming on her little face and it breaks your heart seeing her like this. Whatever it is that she was thinking at that moment, must have been on her mind for a long time.

“Ever since last year the kids in kindergarten asked me why I don’t have a dad. Every kid there has a dad, just not me. I want to have a dad, too, just like all the other children do.” Small tears start dripping down her cheeks, and you can’t hide the ones threatening to leave your eyes too.

“Oh, my sweet girl. Come here.” You gently pull her into a hug, cradling her head in your hands. “Why didn’t you tell me about it?”

“I didn’t want to make you sad. I know that talking about my dad makes you very sad, and I don’t want you to be sad, mommy.” Twice, you felt your heart break within a few minutes. You hadn’t realized the effect this theme has on you, the sadness that still lingers whenever you think about her father. You hadn’t realized that your daughter noticed that. Your empathetic six-year-old daughter. A part of you feels proud of her for being such a sweet considerate little girl, but the other part is scared of how much other stuff she has noticed.

“Nuri, I am so sorry for not talking a lot about your father with you. I promise I will answer you every question about him in the future. And I am not sad when you mention him, okay? It is so important for you to communicate your feelings with me. When something worries you, you can always come to me and tell me about it, no matter what, okay?” You can feel her nod against your chest, her little hands wiping away the tears on her face. “Good. Now try to sleep, sweety. You need to have a lot of energy for school tomorrow. I love you, Nuri.”

“I love you too, mommy.”

-

You feel nervous as you park at the school building. There are several cars there already, all parents who will also be at the conference. Anxiety builds up in your belly, the fears of judgement towards you rising inside of you. This happened a lot at parent conferences when Nuri was still in kindergarten. The parents would be delighted to see you at first, asking if you are her sister but when they find out you are her mom, all you got was weird looks and whispers from other parents. It made you almost skip every conference after that, but you had to go, for Nuri’s sake. So, it’s understandable why your hands are shaking as you enter the school.

You dropped Nuri off at Mrs. Kim’s appartement, not before telling her to stop bringing Nuri’s hope of you getting a boyfriend up. A part of you knows that Mrs. Kim didn’t mean it with any bad intention, but you still don’t want Nuri to think that she will get a dad. Her real father is still uninterested to be in her life, and you don’t think that will change any time soon, and bringing a new father figure into her life is something you are still afraid of. People these days are not looking for serious commitment, they get scared when they hear about the child in your life, and they leave before anything serious can even start to develop. And the last thing you want is to introduce someone to Nuri’s life, just to have them leave a few weeks later. You don’t want to do that to her.

“Y/N.”, you hear someone call out for you and when you turn around you are greeted with the bright smile of no other than Sim Jake. “You made it. I am so happy to see you.”

“Yeah, sorry for not texting you. I kind of forgot about it with the whole stress I was having the best few days.” Jake seems to only smile brighter at your words, one of his hands nervously scratching the back of his neck. It gives you a moment to take him in. He is wearing a baggy pair of blue jeans with a black button up shirt, the arms of his shirt rolled up, exposing his arms. You can’t help but to let your eyes trail to his hands, his beautiful hands, but before you let yourself trail off too long, you let your eyes wander back to his, only to be met by a smirking Jake. Jake noticed your wandering gaze, the way your eyes shamelessly roamed his body. And he can’t say he isn’t flattered.

“Don’t worry, Y/n. I’m just glad to see you again. I hope you are, too.” You can hear the shift in his voice, the confidence and pride in it. And it makes a shiver run down your spine. “But we should go inside the classroom, before the parents get worried where I am.”

For the whole conference, you try to stay focused, to take notes and remember everything Jake was telling the parents, but your mind always drifted off. You got lost staring at the way he was talking so animatedly with his hands, biting his lip, and licking it with his tongue after every sentence, and how he brushes his hair out of his eyes every few seconds. And looking around, you notice that you don’t seem to be the only one staring at Jake. Some other mothers in the room developed a certain fascination with the young teacher, tugging their hair behind their ears and looking at him with a starstruck gaze. Watching them, you notice that you must look the same way when you look at Jake, just how Nuri told you. And it makes an embarrassed flush appear on your cheeks. You should really get yourself together. This is the teacher of your daughter, you shouldn’t be thinking about him in that way, shouldn’t be staring at him with such hungry eyes.

So, when you Jake announces the end of the conference, you can’t help but to hastily back your things into your back and make your way to head out of the classroom. “Y/N.” But Jake’s voice stops you from that. “Can you stay back a bit? I want to talk to you.” You turn around and give him a quick and shy nod, before sitting down on one of the chairs again and waiting for all the other parents to leave. Which turns out to take longer than you thought it would, almost all of the moms line up in front of him, asking him questions and wanting his attention.

Every now and then you see the look on Jake’s face, the tight-lipped smile and the alarming eyes, seeming almost uncomfortable. But you could be wrong about that impression.

Finally, the last one left, leaving only you and Jake in the classroom. He turns to you, a soft and honest looking smile on his lips. “Thank you for waiting, Y/N. I really appreciate that.” You smile back at him, standing up so you can walk over to him.

“Why did you want me to stay back?”, you ask him as you stop in front of him, looking up at him with your wide eyes. Jake seems to be losing the ability to talk again, your eyes driving him crazy. You give him the type of look that makes him want to press you against the next wall and kiss you until your lungs give out.

“I wanted to ask you how you liked the conference.” His voice is low and coarse, and he has to clear his throat a few times to get rid of the lump in it.

“You wanted me to stay back just so you could ask me how I liked the parents conference?”, you ask him, eyebrows raised in a question.

“Yes?”, he answers, his yes almost sounding like a question itself. He scratches the back of his neck again, feeling suddenly so self-conscious. “I mean it was my first time doing something like this and I guess I just wanted to know how I was. You know, if I came across as nervous or insecure.”

You shake your head at him, a constant smile on your lips. “Jake, you did so well. Everyone in this room liked you, and you seemed so confident when you talked about everything. Believe me, no one could have done it better than you.”

Jake feels his heart swell at your words, not having thought you would say something like that to him. It has been a long time since Jake has gotten praised in such a way, and it does something to him, something he can’t admit to himself.

“Thank you.”, he mumbles, a faint bit of blush on his cheeks. “Hearing that means a lot to me.”

You gently squeeze his arm, showing him another bright smile. “No need to thank me. I am just telling you the truth.” You take a step back again, hand sinking back to your side. “But I sadly have to go now. I have to pick up Nari since it’s a school night and I don’t want her to stay awake for too long.”

“Yeah, sure, of course.”, Jake quickly says, walking to his bag and starting to pack in his things. “Give me a second, I will walk you to your car.”

-

This has been the third time in four months that you were too late to pick up Nuri from school. With the newfound time, your boss thought it was a good idea to give you more work, and normally you would decline this amount of work, since it gives you less time that you can spend with Nuri. But more work also means more money, and you need it more desperately than ever lately. The rent in your apartment got raised, fuel got more expensive and all the school stuff that you had to buy also didn’t make your bank account look good.

With your head lowered and guilt tripping down every part of your body, you walk into Nuri’s school. As you step into her classroom, your eyes widen. Jake is sitting beside Nuri on a desk, drawing inside a book with her, while talking to her with a soft smile on his face.

“There you are Ms. Park.”, you can hear the voice of Nuri’s other teacher Mrs. Song.  “We waited for you for 30 minutes now. This is the third time this has happened, and I cannot tell you how disappointed I am with your punctuality. I get that you are young, but that doesn’t give you the right to abandon your own child for whatever party activity you have to do.”

Almost immediately you feel the guilt replace itself with anger. You know that picking up your child too late is irresponsible, but claiming you abandon your child and go partying is reaching too high. You feel like you’re seventeen-year-old you all over again, when everyone told you that you won’t be able to raise a child, that your child will grow up traumatized, wishing they had all the things other kids her age have. They told you to give Nuri up for adoption, that it would be the best possibility at your age.

“I am so sorry I was late picking up Nuri, again. But your accusations are what are disappointing here. As a teacher you shouldn’t have such prejudices against parents. Yes, I am young, but that doesn’t mean I am not able to love and provide for my daughter. Live on day in my shoes and see how well you can manage it.”

A short beat of silence fills the room, and before Mrs. Song can open her mouth to say another word, Jake speaks up first. “Mrs. Song, how about you take Nuri to one of the vending machines and get her a snack, while I talk to Ms. Park.”

With a heavy sigh, Mrs. Song nods, taking Nuri’s hand and walking out of the room with her, leaving you and Jake alone. “Y/n.” He gently says as he walks over to you. And there is something about his voice, so gentle and caring and something about his presence so comfortable and safe, that makes the tears in your eyes break their way free to roll over your cheeks. “Oh, come here.”

Jake gently pulls you into his arms, one hand on your back, comfortingly stroking it, and the other on your head. You wrap your own arms tightly around him and allow yourself for the first time in months to let it all out, the stress, the hurt, the pain, the longing, everything. A sob wracks through your whole body, and it breaks Jake’s heart. He doesn’t know how to help you, what to do to take all this pain away from you. So, all he does is pull you closer – if that’s even possible – and whisper encouraging words into your ear.

“Do you want to talk about it?”, Jake gently asks as he pulls away from the hug, taking your face in his hands and wiping the tears on your face away with his thumbs.

You close your eyes for a few seconds, trying to calm down from your little breakdown, before starting to talk to him. “Everything has just been so hard lately. I can barely pay rent, I have to work longer and harder to earn all the money I need, and Nuri hasn’t stopped talking and asking questions about her dad. I try to act unbothered by it, but if your daughter talks about the boy that has not only broken your heart but left you alone when you most needed him, it makes you relive it all over again. And I just feel like the worst mom on earth for not being able to give Nuri the live she deserves. Everyone is telling me that over and over again, what if they are right?”

“No.”, Jake says shaking his head. He cups your cheek with one hand, the other one taking its place on your waist. “Listen to me. You are an amazing mom, Y/n. God, half of the people that say those mean things want to be just like you. You sacrificed so much to provide for your daughter and that is more than just admirable. You should be proud of yourself, not doubt yourself. Nuri loves you. In fact, you are all she ever talks about. She admires you so much, Y/n, and she loves you with all her heart. That’s what matters the most.”

More tears start to stream down your cheeks, and you whisper a quiet ‘thank you’ to Jake, before pulling him back into your arms. He holds you close, leaving a gentle kiss at your temple every now and then. “How about we get Nuri and then we go out for ice cream? I don’t want to leave you alone right now.”

You nod against his chest, not ready to let go of him yet. “Thank you, Jake. For everything.”

-

Something changed between you and Jake after that day. It started with texts, him checking up on you every now and then, seeing if you need help. Then it developed to calls, once a week, talking about your feelings and worries, but those calls quickly got more frequent and happened every night after you put Nuri down to sleep. And you don’t know how it happened or when it happened, but now you find yourself getting ready to meet him for the first time in another place other than Nuri’s school.

“I think the purple top looks prettier on you, mommy.” Nuri says from where she sits on your bed. You have been changing outfits for an hour now, never finding the right thing to wear.

“You think so?”, you ask as you put it over put it on yet again. “I think you are right. This should be good enough.” You turn around to face Nuri, just to see her snuggled up with her teddy bear, big eyes watching you attentively. “You ready to spend some time with Mrs. Kim, sweety?”

You are answered with a wild nod and a bright smile. You know you could just take her with you, Jake wouldn’t mind that at all, but there is a part of you that really wants to spend some time with him alone. Just you and him.

You shouldn’t feel selfish about it, but you do. You feel like you put your own needs before your daughters’ ones. You know it’s far reached since this is the first time in a while that Mrs. Kim has to look after Nuri, but you hate depending on people. You hate having to drop Nuri off somewhere when you have plans. You hate that you can’t do this alone.

“Hey, pretty girl.”, Jake says as he sits down beside you on the picknick blanket you pulled out for the two of you, a bright smile is on his beautiful lips. “Can I ask you why exactly you wanted to meet here?”

You look at the ocean in front of you, at the soft waves crashing against the shore, glowing under the soft light of the sun peeking through the clouds. There is something magical about this place, something you can’t describe in words.

“I used to come here all the time when I was pregnant with Nuri. It was the only place that seemed to calm me down. I guess I just wanted to share that with you. You have become a very comforting part of my life, and I just thought you would like this place as much as I do.”

There is something in Jake eyes that changes the moment you speak those words. They seem to go lighter, wider, like a little puppy. It makes all the blood in your body rush right up in your cheeks and lets goosebumps rise over your skin. It makes you think about things you aren’t supposed to think, feel things that definitely aren’t appropriate to be thought in public.

Jake takes one of your hands, giving it a tight squeeze before sighing gently and looking out into the sea. You follow his gaze, admiring the sand glittering in the sunlight and listening to the sounds of the seals far off on the water. Both of you relish in the tranquility of the moment, no words needed.

“It’s my birthday next week,” Jake says after a few minutes. “I am throwing a small party. Just me and my three friends and I wanted to know if you want to come as well.”

You look at him only to be met with his hopeful, big eyes. He shows you an encouraging smile, and for a moment you unlearn the ability to speak. “Uhm, yeah, sure. Is it okay if I bring Nuri with me? I hate having to leave her at Mrs. Kims place all the time.”

“Of course, I was assuming she was going to come as well.” Your heart swells at his words, appreciating his attentive soul. You know how much Jake grew fond of Nuri. He talks about her approvements in school all the time, telling you about funny jokes she makes or impressive questions she asks. Jake tells you how smart and polite she is, and how she always tries to include everyone into the little friend group she built. He also tells you how well you raised her, and how proud he is of you for that, but that’s not something you want to focus on, because it makes you think about inappropriate things.

“Then we will definitely be there.” Jake shows you another one of his bright smiles, white teeth on his display. Sometimes when you look at him, through the phone or in real life, you wonder what it is the two of you have. You wonder if it is just a friendship the two of you are building up, or if it is more than that. There are moments- you don’t know if you are imagining them or if they are real- where the tension between you heightens, so much it could be cut with a knife. There are moments in which it feels like if one of you makes a move something is going to happen, something big and heavy. There are moments in which you think that this could be it. This could be yours forever. It sounds crazy, farfetched, but Jake is the type of person you always wanted to spend the rest of your life with. He is the kind of person, you know would treat you right, the kind of person that would have a good influence on Nuri. You know you two haven’t fully gotten to know each other. Jake may be in a completely different chapter of his life. He may not want to commit to something so serious, especially since he is only at the start of his teaching job, or because he is too young to think about having a family. You don’t know what this is between you guys and while you desperately want an answer to that question, you don’t want to risk losing whatever it is the two of your built up in the past weeks.

But when you look at Jake again you can feel the same tension, heavy and thick. You notice his eyes darkening, the way he licks his lips more often and glances down at your own every few seconds. One move, it will just take one move, and one of you is going to break the distance between the two of you.

Jake gently places one hand on your thigh, and you can feel his warmth burning through the material of your jeans and right onto your skin. You have to swallow the gasp that threatens to leave your lips, shocked at what such a little touch from him does to you. His hand travels further up and it almost feels impossible for you to think clearly. Every last piece of sanity left your body the moment Jake touched you and all you can focus on is him. Him and his plump lips, him and his big hands that are touching you in the most alluring way. And him and his big brown eyes, pulling you in and hypnotizing you.

“Y/n.”, he whispers, voice hoarse and rough. Suddenly, his face is closer, lips almost touching yours. You just have to lean forward a little more, but you are frozen, lost in his scent. You want him, you need him. Everything inside of you screams for him, in a way you have never experienced. Your body is pulled towards him like a magnet, and you need him to take you home to him right now. 

But before any of you can suggest that a voice calls out for Jake in the background. Almost immediately the two of you pull away from each other, awkwardly looking around. “Hey Jake. I knew that was your big head.” A man, around your age, approaches the two of you. He is tall, with black hair and a few prominent moles on his face. His smile reveals two little fangs which you find quite adorable.

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t see you have any company.” The man awkwardly glances at the two of you, noticing that he just interrupted something between the two of you.

“All good, bro.”, Jake says, not being able to hide the disappointment in his voice. “Y/n, this is Sunghoon. One of my friends I told you about.” You show Sunghoon a polite smile, reaching one hand out to for him to take.

“It’s nice to meet you, Sunghoon.” Sunghoon can’t hide the surprised look on his face as he takes your hand and gives it a quick shake.

“Hold on, you are Y/n?” You nod your head at him, confused as to why he was reacting like that towards you. “Wow, I heard a lot about you.” From the corner of your eyes, you can see Jakes head falling into his hands, as he lets out a frustrated grunt. A smug grin appears on your lips as you cock your head at the boy in front of you.

“I hope you only heard good stuff.”

“You best believe it was only good stuff. Jake won’t stop talking about you. All day long he goes on about ‘Y/n is so-“ But before he can continue his sentence, Jake slaps one of his hands on the mouth of his friend, shutting him up indefinitely.

“That’s enough from you, Sunghoon. Man, you never know when to shut up.” Jake mumbles that last part, but you hear it anyway. All the doubt you had in your mind earlier leaves your head. Maybe Jake does want you the way you want him. Maybe he really is different than all the other man you met.

“Well as much as I wanted to hear whatever your friend had to say, I have to go now. It was nice meeting you, Sunghoon. And we will call later, right?” As you ask the last question, you look at Jake, eyebrows raised, waiting for his answer.

“Yes, of course. I will call you.”

“Okay, then see you later.” You give Jake a quick kiss on the cheek and show Sunghoon a last goodbye smile, before grabbing your things and walking to your car, leaving an embarrassed Jake and a widely grinning Sunghoon behind.

“So, this is Y/n, huh? Man, now I get why you won’t stop talking about her. She is hot.”

“Hey, come on. Don’t talk about her like that.” Jake shakes his head, blowing out some air from his lungs and closing his eyes for a moment to clear his still foggy mind. He still hasn’t recovered from the moment you two had just a few minutes ago. Jake was so close to kissing you, so close to asking you to go somewhere private, because he knows you felt it too. He knows you could feel the tension in the air, the arousal dripping from your body. He knows it, and he could feel it by the way your body was reacting to him. “She is so much more than just hot.”

“I’m just saying.” Sunghoon shrugs his shoulders, reaching one hand out to help Jake stand back up. “I’m glad you finally found someone, Jake. Happiness looks good on you.”

-

Nuri and you spent three hours baking and decorating the cupcakes for Jakes’ birthday party, and judging by the way Jakes friends stuff them into their mouths, it was worth the effort.

At first you were worries bringing Nuri to a birthday party with three strange men she doesn’t know but watching her giggle at the cream smeared faces of Jakes’ friends, all the worry flew right of the window. From the moment you entered the apartment the boys made it their life mission to entertain Nuri. They went from playing tea party, to performing dance routines, to laying on the ground and acting like they are mermaids. There was not one single wish Nuri expressed, that they didn’t grant in a heartbeat. She wants them to put on lipstick and towels as dresses to make a fashion show. Done. She wants them to act like knights and protect the princess- her- from a dangerous attack. Done. She wants them to carry her around, spin her in circles and throw her high up in the air every five minutes. Done.

And you can see that Nuri enjoys all the attention she is getting. She thrives in it, and it gives you a sense of relief.

“They are so good with children.”, you tell Jake who is sitting beside you, watching as Nuri counts down from ten to search for Sunghoon, Jay and Heeseung in a game of hide and seek.

“They are.”, Jake says, resting his head on your shoulder. “They all want children someday. We had that conversation before, so I knew that they would also love it when Nuri comes over.”

“And you?”, you ask Jake, looking down at him. “Do you want children?”

You can feel him smile from where he has his face buried in your neck. He leaves a gentle kiss at the space between your shoulder and your neck, before lifting his head to look into your eyes. “Yes.” There is no sign of hesitation in his voice, his eyes reflecting his sincerity. “Yes, I really want kids.”

“Now, or in a few years?”

“I don’t care.”, he says, grabbing one of your hands, and playing with your fingers just for a few seconds, before intertwining your fingers. “If now or in five years, I’m ready to have kids. I’ve always wanted them. Why would you think I work at an elementary school?” You can feel the weight lifting from your shoulders. This question has been bothering you for some time now, and now that it’s finally out and is answer is so fitting, you can’t fight the smile lighting up your face.

“Hey, you two love birds. I hate to interrupt your little moment, but I just wanted to ask you if it’s okay that we take Nuri to the playground a street down from here?”, Heeseung asks, looking straight at you. “Ever since we told her about the playground, she has been begging us to take her there. I swear we won’t be long, and we will take good care of her. I swear, I will never leave her out of my sight and stay by her side the whole time.”

This isn’t something you would normally do. You wouldn’t trust someone you barely know to take your child somewhere, but it’s something about the way they took care of her today that makes you trust them. And you trust Jake. You trust him to know what kind of people to introduce to your daughter. “Of course, yes.”, you tell Heseeung, smiling as you see the excitement on his face. “Just make sure to be back by dinner and to not let her on the swing for too long. She always gets sick when she’s on it for a longer time.” With one last nod and a ‘We promise to take the best care in the world about her’, they are out of the door.

It takes a few seconds for you to realize that you and Jake are alone. And it takes another few seconds for you to face the man sitting beside you. There it again, the look in his eyes, making you weak in his knees.

1, 2, 3 seconds pass and Jake can’t handle this silence anymore. He can’t handle the way you look at him and what it does to him. With one tug, Jake pulls you closer and it doesn’t take him long before he presses his lips against yours.

This is different than any kiss you have ever experienced. Jake kisses with a passion, with a longing, you have never felt before. His hands are on your body, in your hair, holding your cheeks. He pulls you onto his lap, never once stopping the heated kiss. You have your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to you, needing to feel him everywhere.

There is an urgency in the kiss, a need to big it’s going to explode. Every pent of thought or longing the both of you have kept to yourself over the past week flows right into the kiss. It’s wild, passionate and so indescribable good. You can feel it tingling all over your body, waking up needs you didn’t know you have, thoughts you always tried to repress. Jakes hands wander over your body again, your thighs, your hips, your waist, your back. And it makes you moan softly into the kiss, breaking free just to take a deep breath which gives Jake enough time to explore the soft skin of your neck. He trails down kisses, stopping at the point where he feels your pulse and licking the sensitive skin.

Another soft moan slips out of your lips, and it drives Jake crazy. It makes his head spin and takes his breath away. There is no clear thought in his head anymore, everything is clouded by the pleasure of this moment. His hands pull you closer to him, eyes closing at the feeling of you, and you have to take another deep breath before whispering your next words.

“Take me to your room, Sim Jake.”

-

“You’re so beautiful.”, Jake whispers as he raises his hand to softly stroke your hair out of your face.

“Good morning to you too.” You have been waking up to the sight of Jake for the past few months now, and no matter how many times you see him like this, you never get used to the sight. His hair messy from the night’s sleep, his naked chest shining in the morning sun and his puffy pink lips puffy from the night before. He is gorgeous, ethereal even. No word describes the beauty he is carrying.

Jake pulls you into his arms so that your head lays on his chest and his arms are tightly around you. “I will never get used to this.”, he whispers. “This is a dream come true.”

“What is a dream come true?”

“You. This. Waking up next to you, getting to spend every day with you and Nuri. This, this is perfect.” You close your eyes, letting this moment sink in for a while. You capture it, take a mental photo and put it in a special box somewhere in your brain, so when things get hard again, this moment will remind you how easy life can be.

“I love you.”, you whisper softly, kissing his chest a few times before laying your head back down on it.

“I love you too, Y/n.” His voice is louder, clearer, like he never wants to hide those words from you, ever. “And I want this, forever. I know I have to move away soon for my job at another school, but we will make this work. I want to make this work. It’s just a two-hour drive, that’s practically nothing.”

You lift your head to look at Jake, admiring the soft glow of his skin. There is an ounce of doubt lingering in the air. You know that his move will complicate things for you. Visiting will be hard with Nuri having to go to school and you having to work every day, but there are always weekends. And if Jake believes that the two of you can make it work, then you will.

So, you nod your head, scooting up to leave a few kisses on his plump, puffy lips. “We can make this work. We will have to.”

-

The sun is shining brightly as you pull up to the school to pick Nuri up. Normally you would wait in the car until she walks out of the school, but since Nuri had an ‘end of the school’ project today, she wanted you to come in and take a look at what she made.

Life has been good, better than good, actually. Everything has been perfect. Jake had become a constant part of your lives, visiting a few times a week and taking the two of you out on trips. Nuri and Jake’s friends- well your friends as well now- have grown incredibly close. She doesn’t talk about anything else other than the boys and how fun it is to spend time with them. They have grown closer to you too, finding a weird kind of solace whenever you are around them.

Everything is the way you always wanted it to be. And sometimes you catch yourself thinking that everything is too perfect, that something is bound to happen any time soon to destroy the little perfect life you build yourself. But you never thought it would happen this soon.

As you walk inside the school, you search for the classroom where they exhibited the projects, stopping when you hear some voices not far from you. You know it’s rude to eavesdrop but when you hear your name in the conversation, you can’t help but to stop and listen.

“Yeah, apparently she and Jake are in a relationship.”

“What? Really? She is really trying to fuck herself to the top, isn’t she?”

“I mean we could have seen it coming, right? The way she always looked at him, like she wanted to eat him alive. It was concerning. It’s a real wonder he didn’t run away when he still could, but now she got him all under her claws.”

“I have known her since our daughters were in kindergarten, and she has always been like this. Whoring around and not caring about her daughter.”

“I mean I knew she was still young and immature, but that is shocking. First, she carelessly gets knocked up at seventeen and then instead of maturing she stays a naïve little girl who fucks her daughter’s teacher. If I were here, I would be embarrassed.”

“It’s no wonder she has no support from her parents anymore. I wouldn’t support my daughter if she were a disgrace to the family like she is.”

“I mean all that aside, I think she should take the time to mature first. She is still so young, not fit to be a mother. Maybe all she needs is a clear mind before she faces the hardships of life. Maybe no one taught her how to be an adult yet.”

“Are you defending her?”

“No, of course I am not. I’m just saying she needs a wake-up call. Something that will help her get all the horniness out of her mind and get her to take better care of her daughter.”

The world has stopped. You could feel it. The air feels heavier, time doesn’t go on anymore and all sounds went quiet. Everything has stopped, except for the thoughts in your head. A dark heavy cloud forms over your head, raining down on you with an intensity, you didn’t feel in a very long time.

Maybe you jinxed it. Maybe your constant worry of something ruining your perfect little life was the one thing that ruined it all together. You should have known it.

The worst thing is knowing that they are right, not with everything of course. You aren’t ready yet. There is so much you still need to learn, so many lessons you haven’t faced yet. You aren’t ready yet. You need to mature; become a proper adult and you really aren’t ready.

You noticed it a while ago, the lingering feeling in your chest whenever Jake was around, the nagging question in the back of your head. You noticed that there was a part of you- a part that grew stronger and stronger with time- that simply wasn’t ready for a relationship yet. And while whatever the women were saying was rude and uncalled for, they are right. They spoke out what you were too scared of admitting. They spoke out what you were too scared was going to ruin all the things you built up.

You can feel it now too, the pain consuming your heart, filling your lungs, and coursing through your veins. The tears filling your eyes, the stop stuck in your throat. But you can’t let it out, not here, not now. First, you have to be a mother. First, you have to look at Nuri’s project, tell her how proud you are of her and take her home to be the mother she deserves. Later, when she’s in bed, that’s when you can let it all out.

“Excuse me.”, you say, your voice surprisingly stable and strong. All four women turn around in a second, looking at you with wide eyes and open mouths. “I was searching for the classroom where they exhibit the school projects. Would you mind telling me where it is? I don’t want to get caught, what did you call it? Ah, yes, whoring around.”

A loud gasp leaves one of the mothers’ mouths and it takes all the strength in your body not to laugh out loud at their faces. One of the other women points in the direction of the classroom for you, gulping almost visibly as you show her a bright smile.

“Thank you so much.”, you say. As you walk past them, you stop, something nagging in the back of your head. “And don’t be jealous that my needs get satisfied every night, I bet your husbands will keep up eventually.”

-

You know that ignoring Jake’s calls wouldn’t be a good idea, but you didn’t think that he would turn up at your doorstep at 10 pm shortly before you were heading to bed.

You spent the past days thinking about your situation, about your relationship with Jake and your and Nuri’s future. Over and over again did you go through all the solutions in your head, trying to figure out what’s right for you, what you want. Because for once, just one time in your life, you have to think about yourself, what you need.

You thought that it wouldn’t take long for Jake to turn up at your doorstep, but seeing him standing in front of you, hair messy, cheeks tinted in a soft red and a worried look on his face, makes you want to change your mind all over again.

“Hey.”, he says, showing you a forced smile. “Are you okay? I was worried. You’ve been ignoring my calls. Did I do something wrong? Did I say something that hurt you? Because if I did then please tell me so I can make it up to you again. I swear the last thing I want is to lose you, but I can’t make it up to you if you don’t talk to me, if you don’t tell me what I did to make you shut me out.” There is an urgency in his voice, pain lingering in his words. You haven’t thought about what the past few days must have felt like for Jake, too caught up in your own head. He tried to call you multiple times and got disappointed every time you didn’t pick up yet again. It must have been torture for him not knowing if he did something wrong, not knowing the reason behind your sudden radio silence.

Looking at him like this, worried and distressed, tears fall down your face almost immediately. “Oh, baby.”, Jake softly coos. Carefully he takes a step towards you and as he notices that you make no move away from him, he pulls you into his arms, holding you tightly against his chest. “Please talk to me, Y/n. Please tell me what’s going on.”

You clear your throat, shakily wiping away the tears on your face. “I don’t want to hurt you, Jake. Please, you have to believe me that that is the last thing I ever want to do. I love you, so much. Sometimes it scares me just how much I do, but lately I’ve been realizing that I am not ready. I am not ready for this, not ready for a relationship. There is so much in my life that I need to fix, so much about myself that I need to fix. I still haven’t lived, you know? I don’t know what it is to actually live, to find myself, to know what I want and what I need. I have so much to learn. And I know that you would be by my side through whatever I am going through, supporting me and lending me a helping hand. But I realized that I need to do this alone. I need to fight through this on my own and grow from it. We are still so young, Jake, so much in our life can still happen and I don’t want you to get caught up in all of this. Especially since you’re moving away and starting a whole new chapter in your life.”

There is a beat of silence, a few seconds where everything is quiet. You only hear your own heart beating out of your chest. Jake wipes at his eyes, one, two times before he nods, slow and steady. “Okay.”, he whispers. Silence again. It’s like Jake is fighting with himself, having an inner conflict, he doesn’t want to share with you. He blows out a long breath, rubbing a hand over his face before looking back at you. His eyes red from the unshed tears.

“Okay, Y/n.”, he repeats again, blinking a few times. “Everything inside of myself is screaming for me to fight for you right now, to tell you that we can work this out and fix those things together. But I know you, and I know that once you made up your mind about something, no one can change that again.” He sighs another time, long and hard. “So, I will let you go. For now, at least. As you said, we are still young. This may be our end now, Y/n, but it won’t be our end forever. I will never give up on you. Someday, I will find you again. Someday, I will make you mine again.” Jake cups one of your cheeks in his hands, gently letting his thumb caress your soft skin. One small tear drops down his face, that is the only one he allows to escape, before he softly places a kiss on your lips. It is not a long kiss, not the type of kiss that leaves you breathless, yearning for more. It’s the type of kiss that is so soft, you wonder if it even happened after it’s over. It’s the type of kiss that rips you open from the inside, tears your heart out and leaves you bleeding out. It’s the type of kiss that makes you want to turn back time and fix all the mistakes you made in your life.

It's the type of kiss that makes you hope for a tomorrow, for a forever.

-

There is nothing you love more than a warm autumn day, watching the leaves fall down the trees, coloring the ground in bright orange and brown shades, or feeling the cold breeze in your hair. You love listening to the rustle of the trees, watching squirrels searching for nuts on the ground and tasting the fresh air on your tongue.

But what you love the most is sitting on a park bench, not one person in sight, with a book in your hand. It has become your favorite activity over the past few years. You read books like it is your job, finally having the time with Nuri almost being eleven years old. It became your little break from reality, something to look forward to on stressful days, something that would ease your mind.

Looking at the watch on your wrist, you realize that it’s almost time to pick Nuri up from her friends’ place, since you promised her to go visit uncle Sunghoon who lives a few streets from you. You put your book back into your bag, swinging it over your shoulder and standing up from where you were sitting to head to your car. But before you could even take one step, you stop in your tracks.

It's been years, you realize. Years since you’ve seen that familiar face. Years since you last hugged him, touched him, kissed him. Years since you heard his voice, seen his face. You almost can’t believe your eyes, thinking that your mind is playing a trick on you. But when you hear him speak for the first time, in what felt like forever, you know that this is real.

“Sunghoon told me I would find you hear.” He steps forward, not stopping until he is right in front of you. His wide, puppy like eyes, look down at you, lips pulled into a wide grin, as he takes the shock on your face. “Hey, Y/n.”

And that’s when it hits you. All the promises he made about not letting you go about making you his again. Now, years later, with everything different, he still intended on making all his promises come true. And you realize that it’s perfect. Right now, it’s perfect. Right now, you can start your forever.

“Hey, Jake.”

Bonus scene

You lean back in the chair on the front porch of the summer house you rented for you and the boys and watch the way Nuri teaches the other kids how to draw a butterfly with chalk. It’s a strange sight to see, Nuri all grown up, taking care of all the small little children. It makes a deep feeling of pride blossom in your chest, admiring just how far you have come.

“It’s crazy, isn’t it?”, Jake speaks up from the seat beside you. “Just how fast the time passes.”

You let your gaze wander to him, to his perfect face with his perfect eyes and perfect lips. He looks older now, more mature. But it is a good look on him. It suits you perfectly.

“It is.”, you say, letting out a soft side before leaning your back against Jakes chest, enjoying the feeling of being in his arms. “But I am so grateful for this. I am so grateful we get to watch the boys’ kids grow up. I am so grateful I get see Nuri so happy and content. And I am so happy I can be with you, Jake.”

“Forever?”, he asks, eyes looking deeply into yours and a soft smile, that is only dedicated to you.

“Forever.”, you answer his question, and you have never been more honest in your whole life.

1 year ago

you reached me all right. while I reached mY LAST STRAW */sobs

i hope i reached you

엔하이픈 박종성 + femreader ? fluff && est. r.s w ﹒ no proofread, kissing && skin ship word count ✢ 651 ⠀⠀ ੭୧ ⠀⠀ ( bookshelf ) !

notes. because i have been obsessed with this man lately!! ₍˄·͈༝·͈˄₎

I Hope I Reached You

hugs you from behind and let you both fall on the bed. his strong arms holding you close you himself as you continue to watch whatever you we watching on your phone. you don't yelp in surprise anymore, as it's not the first time he does it and certainly not the last. he puts his chin on your shoulder and watches your phone.

stalks you pinterest boards. begged you to give you your pinterest "just because", then weirdly he started to buy you everything that was on your wishlist. you complain everytime that it's an unrealistic wishlist for a reason and that a girl must dream to keep living ─ he doesn't care, he loves seeing you happy.

while teaching you the guitar, he would often be closer to you than necessary. his hands moving smoothly to your arm to your hands, caressing your fingers to "help you have the better position"

buys a matching ring set for he both of you when he asks you to be ─ officially ─ his girlfriend. he would be super nervous that day even though he organized everything. he even made your favorite dish for the diner. the look on his face made you think he was planning on telling you he was dying or something.

he put the ring around your finger so softly it made you heart swell. the music in the background made the scene feel as if it was a wedding, the fact he put it on your ring finger didn't help. he buys a new one every year on your anniversary. it's important to him, to let everyone know silently that he someone already owns his heart.

has that habit of constantly having his hand on your lower back. it can be at the restaurant, while eating dinner with your friend and your chairs are beside each other or when you are walking on the streets.

is really serious about the going in dates thing. needs to have a date with you at least every month, every week if you don't have tight schedules. dramatically puts a hand over is heart every time he sees you in your date outfit for the first time.

likes to give you pecks while he talks. first, he will tuck your hair behind your ear while he talks to you, holding eye contact. then starts pecking your lips between every two words. does this mainly when he wants to reassure you.

loves to go shopping with you and choosing items that goes with together for the both of you. it doesn't have to be necessarily the same color but the same vibe, something that just complets each other. for instance, sage green and brown.

leaves notes on your nightstand when he has to leave early. it isn't related to your day or the day before, it's just to remind you that he loves you ─ since he isn't here to do it :

"everything is so much softer and so much sweeter with you."

leaves soft kisses on your forehead while you are falling asleep. you know. when your head is on his chest, listening to his heartbeat. he removes some hair from your forehead and gives tender pecks on it.

jay has that comforting aura when he hugs you. it's reassuring and nostalgic. it feels as if you are a kind again, in you bed sheets, feeling safe as you are surrounded by you favorite plushies. soft and warm.

"you deserve all the love i have inside of me." he whispers in your ear ─ you can only hum at his sweet words, your nose is in the crook of his neck. jay rubs your back gently, until you let yourself fall asleep.

I Hope I Reached You

taglist open ❕ @manooffline @ibsysbsfsunsbs @j1nniee @lilriswife4life network @kflixnet @k-films @/k-labels

1 year ago

*/sobs I kent

˚⁠˳⁠° *⁠ .⁠ ♫ — love playlist

masterlist ; warnings none genre fluff comfort

“in which your boyfriend, sunghoon, overreacted to your text when you were on your period.”

˚⁠˳⁠° *⁠ .⁠ ♫ — Love Playlist
˚⁠˳⁠° *⁠ .⁠ ♫ — Love Playlist
˚⁠˳⁠° *⁠ .⁠ ♫ — Love Playlist

“girl, just tell me what i have to do. i'll do anything for you.”

all you did was send him a text. you were asking him to buy some painkillers on the way home. but now sunghoon is standing by the door frame, panting and sweating. he looked like he just ran for a few blocks.

“are you okay?” he asked still huffing and puffing. his hair was messy all over the place. you could see his jaw dripping with sweat.

“i think i should've been the one asking,” you looked at him full of concern, “gosh, are you okay?” you were going to stand to get him water but the stomach cramps were holding you back.

sunghoon noticed your pained motion. he walked to get closer. his hand busy searching for something in his filled-up plastic bag, “it's your period pain, is it?” he asked with his focus still on the plastic bag.

you nodded quietly. it's that time of the month when every part of your body is in pain. you've been curling on the sofa watching your favorite tv shows in an attempt to distract yourself from the pain. but it comes to nothing. so you asked your boyfriend to get some ibuprofen on his way home. you didn't expect him to dash all the way home.

“here,” sunghoon handed you a bottle of pills. he put the plastic bag on the coffee table and went to the kitchen. you watched him walk back with a glass of water.

you smiled as he passed the glass to you, “thank you for running all the way home for this,” you took the painkiller while sunghoon was busy going through his groceries.

“do you want a hot chocolate or a tea?” he asked weighing an instant hot chocolate and bags of tea. you grinned graciously. he continued, “it's your favorite jasmine tea.”

you shook your head and reached for his hands, “thank you so much, babe. really,” you pulled him closer for a hug.

sunghoon softly chuckled, “i'm kind of sweaty, though,” he said, glancing at you to make sure you were okay.

you hummed in comfort, “i don't mind,” you said muffled in his hug. his hands move in a slow motion on your back. hoping it would ease your pain.

sunghoon put a long kiss on your shoulder, “just tell me when it gets too painful, okay?” you nodded in respond while his hands still gently rubbing your back, “i'll do anything to make you feel better.”

1 year ago

1:43 am and touch starved

[02:08 PM] jake sim — 심재윤

“hey, you okay?” jake asked when he saw your empty eyes. he shifted his attention from the group's conversation to your tired face.

you blinked, “huh? uh, yeah,” you tried to smile assuring him. but his eyebrow frowned, he started to caress your hand.

“do you feel sick?” his fingers found their way to hold your hand, “is the headache coming back?” now his soft hand is on your forehead, trying to check your temperature.

“no, i'm just a little tired,” you said with another smile, “thank you for worrying me, jake.”

“are you sure?” he scanned your eyes as he caress your hair, “you do feel a little too warm.”

“jake, i'm fine,” you look at him right in the eyes, “i might be in need of a kiss, though.”

jake snickered as his cheeks turned slightly red. but then he proceed to give you a peck on your lips.

“eww get a room please, both of you,” jay snapped in the sight of you two kissed. you both laughed.

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