I See You In My Dreams.

dostoyevsky kinda ate with “your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing.”

it’s a weird feeling having to deconstruct the walls I’ve piled so high to protect myself. there’s so little people in this world who know me truly and wholly, and part of that is my own doing, though a decision I’ve been making unconsciously without realising it till my teens.

sometimes I wonder if anyone will ever know the true me, maybe I don’t even know her yet.

one day I’ll learn to live with my grief, for now I just let it consume me. It’s love morphed into misconstrued anger that has nowhere to go

Grief is an amputation, but hope is incurable haemophilia: you bleed and bleed and bleed.

David Mitchell

buddie canon s8 i need it

both teams winning today, I know that’s fucking right!!!! LETS GO BLUES, UP THE CHELS!!! 💙💙

Behind every gay person there is a gayer more evil gay person. Sometimes even two.

I’ve known death since the minute I was born, and though the fact is somewhat dark; I think of death as an old friend. He provides a comfort to those I have loved so dearly that living could no longer give them. I choose to think of death as a positive thing, rather than something to be feared. It is inevitable, and one day I will meet him too.

In September, I’ll be the first person in my family to ever go to university.

It comes with expectations, ones that will weigh me down at times, I have no doubt about it. It’s weird knowing there’s no one I can turn to, to ask what it’s like. I’ll be the first to do it, to experience it.

I have to remind myself to be proud. It’s an achievement I never thought I’d reach. 2 years ago I never thought I’d be alive, let alone about to go to university.

It’s weird and strange, and a whole hoard of emotions I’m sure I won’t work through for a while. But for now, I have to remind myself to breathe, and that I’ll be okay. And most importantly, I did something I never thought I’d do. I’ve reached a point I never thought I’d get to, that at least is something to be proud of.

my dreams are a scary place to be because they always mean something

far too many of my Spotify playlists are about her. And yet I feel like they all still don’t convey how I feel 😔