What Is This Thing
what is this thing
More Posts from Sans-tact and Others
MONSTA X |「Beautiful (Japanese ver.) 」
Write it shitty, write it scared, write it without a clue but don't you be so spineless and have an AI write fanfic for you.
I don’t ship Drarry but with that being said, I will accept no other Drarry prompt than them stubbornly competing to outdo the other for the sheer drama.
It starts off when they’re still enemies in the Goblet of Fire. Draco makes a taunt about who Harry’s going to ask to the Yule Ball and how they must be from the worst of the worst lot and Harry rolls his eyes and says, “Well, fitting you say that, Malfoy, because I was going to ask you.” A perfect zing, Harry. 10/10.
But now the ball’s in Draco’s court and obviously he’s not going to pass up on the chance to humiliate the scarhead so he takes the most logical route of humiliation and calls out his bluff: “Fine, Potter, I reckon we’re going.”
But do you think Harry James Potter is just going to back down? That stubborn teenager is going to stare Draco down and say, “Reckon we are.”
Ron’s confused and Hermione’s confused and literally the entire castle is confused but Harry’s satisfied because he called out a bluffer’s counterbluff with a bluff of his own. And they just keep it up.
“I suppose you don’t even know how to dance, Potter?”
The furious teenager who spent years having to watch soapbox dramas with Mrs. Figg just glares at him in his stupid dress robes. “I know some things.”
“Prove it.”
“Fine.”
It’s like that for days until Draco makes the ultimate power move by inviting Harry to the Malfoy’s Annual New Years Eve Ball, taking out a Daily Prophet ad no less, because oh, oh, he’s got Potter now. He’ll never accept and he’ll be humiliated in front of the entire wizarding world. And do you think Harry’s just going to go down without a fight? God, no, he’s going to win whatever the hell this is because he’s Harry Potter, Draco better be worried, oh boy.
They’re still going at it six months later.
“Err—Malfoy?” Crabbe says. “Potter just sent you a dozen roses?”
“That son of a bitch! Send a box of chocolates. That’ll show him.”
“Um, Draco—?”
“I WILL NOT BE OUTDONE, PARKINSON!”
Draco: Alright, and what do we do if we see a trouble?
Everyone: We drag Harry in the opposite direction.
Draco: Good.
Harry: Hey!
imagine if they’d developed this spell that told the whole school which corridors to avoid and which to use instead.
and some extra muggleborns would make their own ‘diversions’ sign
Imagine Drarry, but instead their rivalry is more like Sasuke and Naruto. So everytime they see each other they have to angrily yell out the others name in repeat.
Like you’re walking through the halls of Hogwarts and you just randomly hear “POOTTTEEERRR” “MALLFFOOYYY” “POOOOTTTEEERRR” “MAAAAALLLLFFFOOOOYYYY”
Lucius: I don't like that Draco dates a boy
Severus: I just don't want the Potter brat to be happy
Petunia: I want Harry as miserable as possible too
Lucius: Okay, so what can we do to end their relationship?
Narcissa: You three are unbelieveble! And you, Lucius, are the worst! Have you forgotten about your crush on James Potter?
oh im not 100% sure abt the cruiciatus, i just remember he was tortured and assumed it was crucio lol... any fic like that w torture even wo crucio that you know of would be a big help
Hey anon! Off the top of my head, Frayach’s Beyond the Ken of Maps, @firethesound‘s And I Know the Spark, and @thegertie‘s Once Spoken are really good fics that include torture. I think they’re all on AO3, and recommend them!
They're like a cheese grater
Also best not to pet sharks without gloves. Their skin can really tear up ours with lots of petting.
yeah, this is what sharkskin looks like under a microscope:
it’s covered with tiny interlocking teeth that form a one-way-only surface! petting a shark the wrong way will literally make you bleed, which is still never a thing you want to do if you are in the water with a shark.
(yes, those are literally teeth-sharks ended up evolving a skin covering completely separate from the scales that bony fish ran with and they did it by mutating the teeth out of their fucking mouths and over their entire surface area)
