What I've Always Needed: Jungkook's Twerk On Loop XD

Chase: heading out to see Nox Deacon: Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do! Chase: I think I crossed that line when I got a date.

Write it shitty, write it scared, write it without a clue but don't you be so spineless and have an AI write fanfic for you.

I had to lol

Nox: I can't marry you, you're too good for me! Chase: What does that even mean?! Nox: You are too nice to me! Chase: I'll be less nice! Nox: Your gifts are too specific! Chase: I'll get you a gift card! I'm sorry! I never meant to hurt you! Nox: You're too emotionally supportive! Chase: We can work on that in therapy! Nox: It's the money! You make too much money! Chase: I'll do improv! Nox: .... Nox: NO!

Yes, trying to reach a pack of pens on the top shelf - i’m too short

sometimes it’s annoying when your character can’t jump in a video game but how often do you jump in real life?

May 26. May 26. May 26. May 26. May 26.

I did not come to have my heart broken

damn i was on my ride back home from a conference and my mind just went like:

what if draco stayed after his trial and started working in the ministry hoping to redeem himself and gives back to the wizarding community to help them repair homes after the war. although he’s trying his best, some wizards still believe he’s evil and working his way through inside the ministry to bring it down again. the exceptions to this are hermione granger and luna lovegood.

harry doesn’t understand why does his friends can easily forgive malfoy. all of a sudden, harry finds that all of his friends are friends of draco malfoy except him. hermione would say “give him a chance,” but harry was not ready to. the only person he trusts at this point is ron.

draco was later assigned as the department secretary of the aurors. he does all the filing and proof reading of every reports. he’s good at his job, harry reluctantly admits but that doesn’t mean it’s a good reason for him to start being mushy with malfoy.

draco tries to be civil of course, but their long history of fight and bullying at draco’s part makes it hard for harry to do the same. call him petty. he doesn’t care.

it was two years after draco’s stay at the department that harry mellows out. he’d seen malfoy’s changed behaviour and attitude. well, okay. malfoy is fucking rich but works for a bare minimum pay wage and mostly donates it to the charity. it’s a pretty darning evidence. he’d seen him eating lunch with hermione. he’d witnessed malfoy siding with muggleborns who are being discriminated in the streets. and had made a few quite friends from them.

so when draco asks him out for a dinner, it shocked him and said no out of panic. he sees draco’s defeated face and did not stop him when draco turned his back and walk to the lobby to go home.

the incident was on his mind for days. he hasn’t seen nor heard from draco. it’s either he’s good at avoiding harry or he’s just really busy. and harry doesn’t know why it bothers him. a lot.

after a week, his floo in the living room rings up. it was draco’s voice asking to be let in. harry steps aside and draco comes out of the floo.

“you owe me dinner.”

harry stammers, completely thrown back.

“i don’t owe you anything malfoy!”

“contrary on what you believe, you actually do. you owe me an apology.”

“what are you on? is this some kind of joke?”

“no, it’s not. it looks like i’m not getting the dinner and the apology. i’ll just get it in another way.”

“i don’t understand anything from what you’re saying.”

“i forgot gryffindors are a bit daft, aren’t they?”

“did you come here just to insult me?”

“merlin, you haven’t been listening. i told you, you owe me.”

“i’ve heard. what i don’t get it is the apology part.”

“i think your brain will combust if you worked it hard. there’s an easy way out of this. open your arms and close your eyes.”

“i’m not going to open my arms and close my eyes!”

“ah, right. you don’t trust me.”

“it’s not that i don’t trust you but i’m not going to do this until you tell me why i have to.”

“you’re not going to do it even if i tell you.”

“then why—”

“just shut your pretty mouth and let me do the talking. close your eyes. no peeking or i’ll kill you.”

“you’re not exactly convincing me here.”

“harry, please.”

his name coming from draco’s lips does the work.

harry closes his eyes and he feels arms coming around him and a chest closing on his own. draco is so warm and harry can’t help himself but return the hug.

“you’re not allowed to say anything.”

“okay.”

“harry, shut up.”

he feels draco’s head between his neck and he presses his body more to him. there’s a myriad of emotions growing inside of him but most importantly he feels relieved.

they stay hugging for five minutes. it was the calmest five minutes harry had so he whines when draco removes himself from harry.

“remember, no peeking.” draco whispers.

harry hears the floo fires out and he opens his eyes to an empty living room.

harry comes to the work the next day and sees a new person behind draco’s desk and a new plaque. the smile on his face is instantly wiped.

Most popular fics of 2017

✔ subjectively sorted by Hits || alphabetically listed || as of 2018.06 ✔ lists of longest fics in 2017   +   lists of all the fests in 2017 ✔ most popular fics of other years

A ▶ L

100,000 Galleons by @bixgirl1 [28k]

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M ▶ Z

Keep reading

My stomach/appetite, a poem

My stomach/appetite is like...

A blackhole

Nothing fills it

Nothing escapes it

It gets bigger

The end.

Draco, before first year: I can’t just wait for Hogwarts, I’m gonna make lots of friends and join the Quidditch team and also…

*6 horrible years later*

Draco, to Voldemort: Fuck you.

Draco, to Dumbledore: Fuck you.

Draco, to Lucius: Fuck you.

Draco, to Hermione: Fuck you.

Draco, to Ron: Fuck you.

Draco, to Harry: Fuck me.

Draco, giving everyone the middle finger: I hate everyone, life is horrible and this school sucks. Goodnight.

A lot of the substances we think of as protection against the supernatural (e.g. salt, silver, garlic) are actually antibacterial, and would have helped stave off infections and illnesses that people once attributed to supernatural influence.

Based on this, I want to see a story where vampires are repelled by hand sanitizer.