You’ve Got To Embrace Being Weird Or Else You’re Going To Die Both Spiritually And For Real Life

My pet bacteria just walked into a puddle of hand sanitizer and died

one direction is like the pyramids. they existed but you’re not sure how

maybe you nerds should try a real “goblet of fire” and light up a bowl

id blow up hogwarts with a rocket launcher

i still call her marina and the diamonds i don’t give a fuck

the ICU nurses when i tell them i tripped ass first onto the bakugou figurine

I never understood why "Sucks dick" means "Thing nobody likes" should be the polar opposite "This meal is so good, it sucks dick!" You know? OH SHIT

this is a strong contender for the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever seen