Clint Barton X Ftm Reader - Blog Posts

Well I see a handsome boy (Clint Barton x teen!FTM reader)

Pairings: Clint Barton x teen!FTM reader

Synopsis: During a dysphoria episode, Clint is here to remind you you who you are 

Tw: angst,hurt/comfort,crying, talk about dysphoria, Intusive thought, fluff, please don’t read if it makes you uncomfortable

Note: You are all beautiful/handsome

You were having a really bad day, everythings was awful...First, the pills for your insomnia that Bruce gave you didn’t work so you find yourself with another sleepless night, then, your dysphoria came out...

In your bathroom, just looking at your reflection want to make you puke and you became a crying mess. It was not the first time dealing with it, discovering your transidentity made you aware of those problems and how to understand and calm them. But this time, the accumulation of missions plus the lack of sleep made your crisis much worse.

Now on your bathroom floor, you’re trying to steady your breath with exercices but they are not working as a result of a hard breakdown. Still in your head, you didn’t hear your name called by your fellow team mates: the Avengers who are in the kitchen. It’s always the same buzzing sound that completely cuts you out until you hear or “make out” several knoks. 

Unable to tell the person to leaves you alone and not to open the door, you muffled your cries with your hands and tried to be silent even with your sobs. Suddenly, the door opens with a loud sound making you flinch a little and you were seeing a worried Clint, panting:

Clint: It’s like the fourth time we called y-hey are you okay ?

You can’t help but snort and respond with sarcasm:

Y/N: I’m c-crying on my bath-bathroom floor and you ask me if I-I’m okay ? Do I look like I’m fu-fucking okay to you ? 

Clint face softened when he saw the state you were in and he immediately went by your side with a respectful distance.

Clint: Can I hug you ?

He knows your limites and when you shook your head no, he only puts an open hand on the floor for you to take it. Craving for little human comfort, his hand became the most important thing to you so you squeeze it as if your life depended on it. He squeezes back with the same strenght and he gently moved his thumb in a circular motion over your hand while you are crying. 

A few minutes later, you regain your breath, some sniffles can be heard and during your episode, without noticing, you got closer to Clint needing more comfort; He didn’t say anything but his arms were around you in a tight embrace and you do the same. 

Clint: Do you want to talk about it ? 

Y/N: It was just a bad day, it’ll pass

Clint: Nope, don’t do that, it’s not only a “bad day” so talk to me, I’m here kiddo.

The nickname made your heart soft and new tears appears in your eyes.

Y/N: I feel so awful...Why I can’t control anythings today ? Dysphoria is bitch, I hate it, I hate how I look, I hate my chest, I fucking hate myself ! Why I’m not normal like everyone ? Why I have this body...I’ll never be a boy for them. And I’m so tired. I just want one good night of sleep without nightmares or fucking intrusive thoughts.

Clint was right, venting is making you feel a little bit better but the guilt came rapidly.

Y/N: I’m so sorr-

Clint: Don’t.

Y/N:-y.

Clint: Y/N, you did nothing wrong, you don’t have to apologize for telling me that you’re not okay. Like I said, I’m here for you and if venting make you feel a little better then everything’s fine. You know, I’m so proud of you, and all the team think the same. You are always here to help peoples and always so kind and funny with us. You are strong and you're skills are amazing. And well I only see one handsome boy here and plot twist it's not me.

Y/N: Hey no, you're handsome too !

Clint: Thank you but we are not talking about me. We all saw you as a boy because you are a boy Y/N, nothing will changes that. I know that dysphoria is a demon you have to fight but you don't have to do it alone. I am here, Nat are here too and all the team wants to help you kid. We love you for who you are and not for what your head is telling you.

Unable to speak through your tears, you just squeeze Clint more in your arms and he do the same with you.

Y/N: T-Thank you Clint, I needed it.

Clint: You're welcome kiddo, glad I could help you. Now come on, I think Wanda made your favorite.

The both of you get up. You wipe your face with Clint's help and went to join the others. On the way to the kitchen, you spot Pietro who sent you a wave with a smil. You do the same with a smile on your own and he enters the room.

Clint: You should really ask him out.

Y/N: Don't start...

Clint: What !? It's obvous that you two like each other !

Y/N: Clint stop !

He laughs and you nudge him on the shoulder. Well you are definitely blushing now.

----------------------------------------------------

Thank you so much for reading this !I hope you enjoyed this story !

Sorry for my mistakes, english is not my first language :)