Did - Blog Posts

not to shit on anyones parade but as both a kinnie/system can i say this?

stop using system terms singlet kinnies!!!!!!!!!! it both a) can really mix up people with systems who don't know it (as me who thought some of my fictives were a kin, yes, it can happen) and not to undermine what a kinnie goes through, it really butchers how people see the both of us. some of these terms are exclusive (and professionally used) terms for systems

DON'T say switching; DO SAY shift

DON'T call your kins a system

DON'T or TRY TO avoid terms like plural or things like that

PLEASE KNOW: you're NOT a fictive if you're a singlet. Fictives are NOT kin terms

Hello, Tumblr!

today, we’re gonna be talking about my head cannons (in my Transformers AU) about BlitzWing! Yay!! [below keep reading, it’s a long one]

Lets get one thing clear…I DO NOT HAVE D.I.D.!! I NEVER HAVE, AND ONLY KNOW ONE PERSON FROM THAT ONE CAMP THAT ONE TIME!! I DO NOT SPEAK FOR, OR REPRESENT ANYONE WHO HAS D.I.D.!! PLEASE DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH AND DO NOT TAKE WHAT I SAY AS FACTUAL ABOUT ALL DID INDIVIDUALS!! Any refrenced information is mainly from [here]

Next, I’m not sure if BlitzWing in TFA is actually stated to have DID, but in my AU, we’re making it some-kind of thing like that, but with alien war robots in space. The TFA BlitzWing (seems to) switch based on emotion, but to make it more accurate, that won’t be how it works in this au.

Finally, to not misrepresent anyone, (As a person with very mild childhood trauma,) We will not go into depths about why BlitzWing has this. The only ‘hint’ I’ll give is it’s one of a bajillion reasons he hates the Quintesson, and the main reason that sends him into a rage.

Lets set some basic information for BlitzWing first

-BlitzWing has three alters, though the alters and BlitzWing doesn’t give them names. Mostly, others will just call all the alters BlitzWing. In addition to this, all Alters have understood they are one body, and know that they are all tied to one form. BUT!! Just to make it easier to understand in this post, we’ll be calling them by their main emotion, Icy refers to the base personality, Anger refers to the more aggressive personality, and Crazy to the…crazy personality. (Though, crazy might be offensive in this way, I hope we’re not becoming Twitter and making everything a big ass deal.)

-They choose to refer to sleeping/recharging as ‘a meeting’ or something similar to that. Because when sleeping/recharging, all the alters meet in the void that is their head and talk until they get back up and one of them fronts for a while.

And…Lets meet the people!

Normal/Base/Regular BlitzWing

Thoughtful, Observant, Straightforward, Calculated, Calm, Stern, Intelligent, Quick-Thinking, Reserved, Creative, Cooperative, Antisocial, Serious, Mature, Reliable, Blunt, Diplomatic.

He’s AroAce, and sees love in any way as a distraction for their important position. However, he does acknowledge his alters do not feel the same way about this, and doesn’t prevent them from seeking it out.

He hates functionalism, and generally wants to free all cybertronians from any kind of oppression, to be free and do as they wish with no judgment. Not only was he oppressed because he couldn’t control his alters (in the past), but he was also oppressed for what he used to do for work [unspecified].

He struggles to remember all of what his alters do, but he can remember snippets of what happened. Not even ShockWave can force him to remember them. Along with that, he also struggles to remember some of the trauma they have, remembering his work and being with the triple changers, but not explicitly what happened. But, he remembers enough to keep it away from Crazy.

As the Decepticon’s tradesman (or tradesperson? Tradesmech? Idfk), he’s gotten good at being straightforward and unmoving. He may not be Swindle levels of bargaining, but he knows a bad trade when he sees one. He knows exactly what anything is worth, and what is best to risk.

Though he keeps a face a seriousness and holds emotions back to keep his profession appearance, there is a part under it all—usually only reserved for his alters and special friends—that wants some kind of relax, to not have to be serious all the time, though his way of being unserious is being boring. (He doesn’t think it is, but it is to others.) He wants to do art just for fun, even if it just doesn’t many any kind of sense. But his other main priorities is keeping his alters safe and content, so he likely won’t get to any time soon.

He’s good friends with SkyWarp, having been for a while, though he doesn’t have anything romantic with them. He knows they identifies as a femme, but in all honestly, he couldn’t care about it. It doesn’t mean anything to him, but it’s not going to affect him.

Anger/Emotional/Persecutor

Strong, Firm, Incisive, Irritable, Emotional, Irrational, Inconsistent, Illiterate, Dauntless, Independent, Protective, Critical thinking, Thorough, Unpopular, Brave, Serious.

He says he knows why they have three personalities, but he absolutely refuses to say why, and ShockWave wasn’t able to find anything while in this alter, as all three of them have the same memories from their past, and it seems to be erased and/or corrupted beyond recognition.

He can be triggered into coming out by any mention or seeing any figure or picture that looks like or similar to the Quintessons. He is usually sent into a blind rage by it, and if—hypothetically—a human showed him an image of the Quintessons, that human would by nothing more than a puddle on the floor in the next two seconds.

tentacles also make him uncomfortable (especially ones from the Morphobots since they look very similar to Quintesson ones).

On the surface, he’s rude to everyone, especially sparklings. (The living embodiment of the “Yoo Xan Get Your Boy Dawg” meme) He’s upset by nearly everything, and is hardly ever in a good mood. Nobody really tries to talk to him or get in his way, especially because they know how badly he’ll react.

He’s a good solider, being strong enough to overpower most, thorough with his kills, brave enough to dive into any situation, and treating it with seriousness, but he likes to work on his own, and will get more upset with any kind of taunting or teasing. Though no matter his anger, he’ll always be precise.

With battle smarts comes a downside, and his downside is his illiteracy. He does feel embarrassed he’s the only alter who can’t read, but he doesn’t know that a lot of Decepticons share the same problem. (Maybe not ‘i literally can’t read a single thing on this page’, but certianly ‘uhhh…One….Fisuh…Twoh…Fisuh…’)

His only close friend is AstroTrain, as they both fought (Autbots and each other) on Earth, with a lot of time to spare. Though, he only sees him as a friend. He might be willing to give romantics a shot, but he doesn’t know, as nobody would be willing to do that. (More than one reason why)

Crazy/Childish

Kidish, Commanding, Carefree, Creative, Blissful, Uplifting, Annoying, Intolerant, Energetic, Adventurous, Jovial, Effeminate, Irritable, Clingy, Venal, Messy, Innocent, Undisciplined.

Unlike the other personalties, he feels a much larger range of emotions. He can be angry, calm (as much as crazy can be), but he can also be sad, happy, bored, scared, and will love anyone and anything. And since he’s the most emotional, it’s a lot harder for the other alters to take over when he’s fronting, and they have to catch him off guard (crying, sleeping, etc) to get control back, and keep him down for a while.

He was suppressed while in the hold of the Quintessons, both Icy and Anger not wanting him to come out and be ruined by what was happening, and they somehow managed to do that for years.

His friend is BumbleBee, yes the autobot BumbleBee. They met during the earth wars, and ever since, He’s been enamored by him, even bringing him to his base and accidentally making him a prisoner. (He had good intentions)

In human terms, he’s very dog-like. He’s clingy to anybody who’s nice to him, overly happy, energetic, playful, and messy. Looking at their room, it’s clear BlitzWing lets Crazy out the most there, probably because he keeps him cooped up in his head for long periods, and their room is the one place where BlitzWing is fully comfortable letting him go wild in. He’s drawn on the walls, has his things all over the room, but the one place HE KNOWS not to go near, is their shared self, where all three personalities share VERY PERSONAL things to remember.

He isn’t disciplined by the Decepticons, being treated more as a child than an actual member, knowing eventually he’ll switch back to a different, more competent one. He’s easily bribed to doing anything, but doesn’t always get what he’s promised because usually they’ll switch before they have to. (Usually convincing him to do missions and jobs.)

ALSO because he isn’t disciplined, he doesn’t understand what anything he does is wrong, unless the alters go out of their way to tell him. If someone ignores him, refuses to do things with him, or doesn’t let him do things, he’ll get upset. (Though more times than not, he doesn’t get his way anyways.)

He assumes that anyone who’s even slightly nice to him really likes him. To anybody who isn’t firm or stands up to him, he will not shut up, will not let go, and he has no dignity for himself.

so, that’s all we got so far! This post will be updated if new information comes about, and if anyone does have DID and wants to correct me on something, please do so! I don’t want to offend any of you! I strive to be well informed!

Alter Fun Fact #1

Lyrics from "Everybody Likes You" by Lemon Demon

Darnell wears rose tinted glasses!

We think he might have NPD, but it's very strange because no one else in our system acts anything like that. He's also very stereotypical and exaggerated so at first I was hesitant to say he did... but now I'm starting to think that's mainly because he has no social skills whatsoever and has barely talked to anyone outside of our system. If that is the case, it's really interesting how disorders can present differently in systems!

Either way, the tinted glasses represent the unrealistic "lens" through which he sees the world. He automatically assumes he's very important and likeable to everyone, and entitled to their attention. He doesn't seem to understand why this isn't the case and gets frustrated when things don't work out the way he wants them to.

We're starting to understand why he acts like this though and hopefully with some patience we'll work it out ^^

When you struggle with identity loss so you just adopt that as your identity.

Me: Scrolling thru Tumblr

Theo: Fucking fronts specifically to make me go back and like a post I didn't care enough to like myself

And that's how literally every post on our feed was liked.

Do any other systems just... like... look through stuff they made/said before they knew they were a system and cringe so hard?

Like. Personally, we made up an entire alternative explanation for what we were to avoid being associated with alters... but uh, funny story, here we are now :]

Bart has DID theory

Aha this is a long one... Adding onto my post a little bit ago cause I was on the train and didn't have enough rant energy-

Bart has eidetic memory, or Hyperthymesia, or photographic memory, whatever works for you. He remembers everything he's ever read, seen, or heard, but in some of the comic strips, it's him being confused about a certain series or event that happened, like he didn't recall it almost, which is almost impossible due to his advanced memory. One of the most common symptoms of Dissociative Identity Disorder is memory gaps when in a different personality. You have no idea how excited I am about this cause I have DID and positive representation, yes please. When I find the comic strips I'm talking about I'll repost and add them in but I'm on a rampage rn. Not even sorry.

Bart is known to have mood swings throughout the entire Impulse series, where he gets grumpy or pouty, things like that, but that childish nature could actually be a personality. He could feel robbed of his childhood since he couldn't "live it" due to his situation growing up, so he creates an entire persona to live like a child in his teenage body. Everyone always brushes it off to him being "a speedster", and the fact that he is ALSO supposed to represent a character with Autism and his ADHD plus ADD, it all kinda adds up, because he switches into this person sometimes that's sarcastic and has a more bleak outlook. He still is always there for his friends, even if they underappreciate the HECK out of him, but it wouldn't make sense in the sense that he's silly only because of his Hyper-changing Autism. AUTISM ISN'T A PERSONALITY PEOPLE. Honestly? The excuse that it's because he's a speedster doesn't add up either. Being a speedster can make him bored easily and he has a hyperglycemia diet where he has to eat full meals every two hours, but it doesn't explain why he so suddenly shifts into entirely new moods. being moody is one thing, but being Bart is a whole new can of worm on strings.

I think one of the biggest things to show this is when Jerico shot his knee using the body of Deathstroke. Before the incident, he never wanted to take up Wally's mantle because he thought it was disrespectful and he didn't deserve it, but after he was shot he took no hesitation in taking up the suit. That entire comic screwed me over because: 1, no one touches my baby Bart. 2, everyone was so rude to him like 24/7?? To BART of all people. 3, that gunshot would've done a LOT more damage then what they diagnosed him. A SHOTGUN was TWO INCHES from his knee and blast him from that space and they gave him a prosthetic kneecap? Excuse me, there'd be nothing LEFT to ATTATCH IT TO, but that's a rant for another time. What I'm getting at here is he wanted to exact his revenge on Jerico, which is typical, I would too if someone capped my knee. But he read the ENTIRE SAN FRANSICO LIBRARY IN ONE SITTING!! Bart, who HATES sitting in one place reading anything that isn't a comic read an entire LIBARAY and not some normal one, this one was MASSIVE. He learned everything about the human nervous system and used it against Slade to his advantage, before it was revealed it was actually Jerico.

SO, he took on the Kid FLash mantle, something he said he wouldn't do. He read an entire library in one sitting, something he wouldn't noramlly do. He became incredibly serious about his mission, something he normally isn't. His kid Flash persona is not him. His trauma from the experience added with his stress must've forced a new one to form, since he already Had his "Impulse" persona it was easy.

Bart Allen has DID and no one can change my mind.

tw! vent below the cut

i just wanna talk to someone.

have a real, honest, personal conversation. not one that only lasts a few seconds.

maybe that's because nobody wants to talk to me.

maybe im too boring, or too much.

maybe im too weird or too dry.

maybe its just all my fault that nobody wants to talk to me.

im sorry that i cant be normal. im sorry im imperfect and just wrong. im sorry im not made up to your expectations

i really want to be "human" what does that even mean?

like everyone else

but i guess i wasnt built for that

fictive introject list

didn't wanna cram them all into my bio so here's who you might see me project as:

Sunny (Omori)

Basil (Omori)

Kel (Omori)

Hero (Omori)

Aubrey (Omori)

Suguru Geto (Jujutsu Kaisen)

Satoru Gojo (Jujutsu Kaisen)

Tsukasa Tenma (Project Sekai)

Hikaru (The Summer Hikaru Died)

So happy for you guys, there’s nothing beautiful than been with someone you love and feeling loved as well❤️🏳️‍🌈

So... We Got Married! 🎀

Soo happy to be finally married to my beautiful wife Zoey 🩷

Sempre Fidelis Mea Mollis Regina Puella

I hate it whenever people say “mental health matters!” Until you have a disorder that their neurotypical brains can’t understand. Because the second you tell them about it and it doesn’t fit their romanticized versions of the disorder, they look at you as if you have three heads.

can anyone else relate to this problem? :(

shoutout people who feel too plural for singlets and too singlet for plurals. it can suck to be out of place, i get it.

shoutout people who use "personalities", "emotions", "identities", "parts", or similar, i do this too. none of us are really sentient enough to use anything else.

shoutout systems and such who are too blurry to tell who they are. this is what we are like. we almost never have a sense of identity, and even when we do, it's extremely vague. we can't notice switches and we don't feel any different from anyone else.

...and more i haven't mentioned.

FELT CUTE, MIGHT DELETE LATER

Okay, we love and hear you out, but, please, we beg of you, not the puns-

Please-

You don’t understand, we have a sans alter-

you’ll give him iDEAS-

aaAA-

when there's fighting in headspace......... call that an altercation