Everything Youve Said Is 100% Objectively Correct And Canon - Blog Posts

cat dad zhonks has been living in my head rent free & i just wanna say the hourlyzhongli twitter acc has validated the idea. miss milky canon confirmed

Please go off about the Zhongli having a cat

OK IM-

Zhongli has never owned any pets in his life. Too busy. Now that he's "mortal" he has more vacation time

He finds a little white cat outside the parlor all dirty and crying. Ofc he can't just leave the poor thing??

He washes her up and talks to it like it's another human. Saying things like "you're quite filthy little one, did you roll in the dirt?"

Afterwards he has some nice fish laid out for the cat, like some high quality fish because such a fine young lady deserves a wonderful meal. The cat sits on the far end of the table with a little tiny fancy bowl to eat out of out. He thinks of her as a special guest, not really expecting to keep her.

It starts pouring and Zhongli feels bad sending her out now so he keeps her overnight. The cat finds it's way into his bed and curls up on his chest. Shes all soft and warm and the purring is so soothing.

The next day he sets up breakfast for her and continues to talk to her, asking her how breakfast is and listing the ingredients and their importance to flavoring the dish. It genuinely feels like he's happy to talk to the little cat.

Long story short, he can't bare to part with her so he ends up keeping her. He spends every waking moment trying to come up with a name. I'd say realistically he'd come up with a special name with a beautiful meaning, but my self indulgence wants to say he named her Miss Milky bc she had a little milk beard once and it made him laugh (I really dont want to go looking for names ok).

Yes, you have to put the "miss" in front of the name bc you have to be respectful to the young lady; it's part of her name.

Miss Milky goes EVERYWHERE with him except outside the city; it's too dangerous for her there. She either follows him or is carried around. He goes to an important meeting and miss milky is in his lap, purring and smiling a cat grin.

Pays way too much mora on her. A single toy costs enough to have several different dishes at the most expensive restaurant. Miss Milky is absolutely spoiled with the best. Plus zhongli has never owned a cat so he wasn't exactly sure what she'd like so he got everything that was recommended to him.

She sleeps with him too. All the time. Usually cradled in his arms, laying on top of his chest, or nestled in the crook of his neck. She does have a nice cat bed but hardly uses it. Zhongli has gotten used to sleeping on his back now.

Literally spends time with her?? Someone invites him to dinner and he denies saying he already has plans and it's just him taking a stroll with miss milky like he promised when he left.

Does she get cute little accessories? Damn right. She has a cute little collar with a bell and a bow he puts in her fur on special occasions. When winter comes she also has a little hand knitted sweater that probably costs more than you could afford..

Do not mess with his cat. You'll die. A dog barking at her? Zhongli does not abuse animals but he can strike fear into it with once glance. You just some bum insulting a man for loving his cat? Calling her a pest? Don't even come back to his parlor or associate yourself with him ever again.

Zhongli is the meme of the samurai holding a sword protecting his cat. That's the dynamic.