Feminst Rant - Blog Posts

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

                  Let me start by saying I grew up on Beetle Bailey. I’m not criticizing the strip in general. The comic above appeared on May 16. It illustrates a long standing discussion that has been going in our house.   On the surface we see a guy surrounded by women who won’t give him the time of day. He goes home depressed. Are we supposed to feel sad for this lonely fellow? What about the girls? They seem to be taking a lot of blame for his woes. “Hey darlin’”, “Honey”, “Sweetie”.  Are they really supposed to respond positively?  

              This strikes a cord with me because I am one of these ladies.  I myself have had words like that thrown at me from car windows, in the aisle t the grocery store, or at work.   I too am going about my day, not looking or wanting attention. Yet just like these women, I am somehow to blame for not responding appropriately. I am told  that this behavior shouldn’t bother me. It’s just harmless flirting. I should be flattered. I am not.

               If it makes someone uncomfortable then its not harmless. I have met very few women who are okay with this kind of treatment. They have learned the best way to deal with it, is to just ignore it. Any kind of positive response encourages them. A negative response can make the man aggressive and may lead to violence. Going through the day with your head down and headphones on is no way to live. We girls have learned from our experiences. Now we just have to teach the men.

               Our hapless friend needs to learn how very wrong his approach is. Clearly, he wants a relationship. A verbal scattershot isn’t working. Nor would the classic construction worker catcall. I believe it will take someone teaching him, and others of his kind, to be respectful and thoughtful. The more we push for change on a societal level, the more it seems there is resistance. Its time to take it to a more individual level.

               Teach him to be nice and kind, he will win the fair maiden’s hand and perhaps he will pass it on to his own sons.