Jirai Danshi - Blog Posts

I noticed to liked my post about hypersexuality and I noticed you like cinnamoroll, so I thought I'd digitally give you a cinnamoroll plush.

You may save them as the background on your phone, computer or laptop, witch ever you have Tumblr on so that when ever you open that device you see them and (hopefully) smile.

this kinda made me tear up. Tysm. I js cms because I was having the most disgusting thoughts about myself and others, and I didn't know how to stop it. idk if It's an episode or not, but his really js fucking made my night ♡♡♡♡♡ I can't thank you enough ♡♡♡

ur amazing and you dont even know it

lol ya I dont🤤🤤🤤🤤

I hate when my mother wants to "experiment" with food

I reeeealllyyy wanna go to a mental hos >_< no responsibility, no expectations just being as unhinged as I want and getting care !?!? Sounds fabulous

idk what happened to my day, but I feel really bad now. I guess that's what I wanted

I js feel very small. Like I want to be. I really want someone to care for me, and like me, and not make me feel bad. I'm very scared right now, I don't have anyone to help me, and its really scary. I know I kinda joke about suicide but I don't tell anyone about how bad it gets. I don't like getting violent thoughts to hurt myself, I just want to be held and taken care of, and understood that I can't be ok

Whatever, mb, my throat really hurts

KK therapy was alright today :3

My therapist convinved my mother to stop pestering with questions about my life, sooo yipiierrss !!!!

But now i feel weird, ebcause i feel happy without feeling manic and hyper...sooo uhhh, i might slit or sum to make myself feel worse again :3

ALTHOUGH I DOOOO WANNA KEEP UP SOME MOTIVATION TO WRITE, SO I MIGHT TRY TO GET SO MANY CHAPTERS OUT :D

idk if im gonna be able to keep myself stable enough to fake being non suicidal in therapy tmrw :P Plus i think my hearts gone again, so if i get hospitalised, uhhhh :(((( I'll cry :(( because i wont be alowed on my phone, and i need to be online otherwise i wont be able to get any attention ╯︿╰

I wanna be independent because that's how I've been taught to be, but whenever someone starts talking about having a partner or a friend group I get so sick with jealousy

Shes found someone else omfg how do I mess all this shit up this bad

( ´△｀)

don’t come into my life just to leave. i will slit my throat.

"I never even liked you"

SDUHXNUWDHXHUSHDX THANK U FOR THE SPAM U SPARKLING NEW MOOT

WAHHH, I WAS LITERALLY GONNA DO THIS AS WELL >//////<

tyssmmm new moot >/////<;

i hate having a dream about the actual perfect man to exist ever, and where i get all taken care of and loved because waking up is even more unbearable :(((

XP dawg I never check my follow count

Thxs for 52 ^^ (I have 71 on my main, WHICH IS CRAZY CAUSE IT WAS AT 50 AS WELL LAST TIME I CHEKCED😭😭😭)

WAHHHH, I HAVE WCHOOL IN TWO DAYS IM GNA KMSSSS

I'm definately over her

*I whisper, stalking her social media and stalking the people that she follows and the things she likes*

FUCK THIS BINGING PERIOD I FEEL LIKE IM GOING TO THROW UP

WAHHHH, I CANT TAKE BEING ALOONEEE, IF I DONT GET A PARTNER BY NEXT YEAR I'LL BE PUTTING MY HEAD INTO THE OVEN

WAHHH TYSM FOR THAT TAG !!!

(I'm gna blur the songs cover because there's like blood and disturbing shit)

(the blue eyes look so unsettling-)

TAGS !!!! (sorry if there unwanted, im also tired so i wont be doing a lot of my moots)

@gutted-pawz @insufferablewhore @2u1c1d4l @noodle-bro @crumbledtoast

i found a cool tag game on twitter and i really wanna import it (o^ ^o)

this picrew + the last song you listened to :]

no pressure tags: @blood-loving-leech @overtaken-boredom @lesbianthatyaps @kameonerd566 @hexedvampire @laczki @anonymous-shxtposter @fleurafae @flovqy + anyone who wants to do it <3

OK I THINK I HAVE ONE EXCEPTION FOR THIS

I'll only let some older man, who doesn't want to do it, bc he doesn't want to hurt me, but does it anyway because he feels bad, but he's flustered and hesitant the whole time, and when he does it, it barely even cuts the skin, but the second time he gets to confident in himself and ends up cutting to baby beans

●\>/////<;/●

(And then he cleans it franticaly and cuddles me and kisses the cuts after)

Idk if it's just me but the thought of having someone cutting me for me sounds so gross.

Like for starters, what if they get there greasy finger oils on it and my blade rusts😒

And what do I do, just...sit there and watch them do it ? Or do I strike up conversation ?!?!? 🧍‍♂️

I js like doing it alone, cause I know exactly how I want it, and I get to be proud of myself for going deeper and getting more blood >:3

I needdd to take a shooweerrrrrr, wahhhhh I don't wannaaaa.

But my hair is so crunchy, it's been like a week since I've had a shower or brushed my teeth🧍‍♂️

Ugghughhhu this is so annoying, I haven't gotten sick for years but these 2 months I've just STAYED sickkkkkk

I also have had no appetite and it sucks whej my mother makes me over eattttt, it makes me wanna dieeeeee

Ive also had no energy to cvt so I've js been so fucking stressed💔💔 and I can't cut how I want 💔💔

I need someone to stay with me so bad omfg😭

The amount of times I've tried to tell people to not talk to me if they can't handle me bc I know I'm not a great person, but people are always like

'No I don't mind, I can handle it ^^'

LIKE OBVIOUSLY YOU COULDNT BECAUSE YOU LET ME GET ATTACHED THEN LEFT

AGAHAUAHAHAHA IF I GET ONE MORE FP OR FRIENDS AND THEY LEAVE, YALL WILL NEBER SEE ME AGAIN 💀

AHH I LOVE WHEN SHE SENDS PICTURES AND VIDEOS OF HERSELF, SHES SO FUCKING PRETTY IT MAKES ME WANNA KMSSS, AHHHH MWWAHHHH <3333

CAN WE ALL AGREE THAT JIRAIBLR IS BETTER THAN JIRAITWT AND JIRAITT ?!?!?!?!

It just feels so much more inclusive and accepting.

I THINK I FINALLY UNDERSTAND WHY I SWITCH UP ON PEOPLE SO QUICKLY NOW !!!

(this applies more for people I know irl rather than online)

So yk how sometimes you have fake arguments in your head ? I do that but have full conversations. But it can be very specific.

For example, I always think about what will happen in my therapy sessions, and since I hype myself up about what it's going to be like, I get disappointed and upset when my therapist seems to be going off my script

It happened today with my teacher. I built up the courage to go up to him and ask about the test and if I could do it earlier (since I was leaving school, before the time of the test) and the second I asked, he looked uninterested and plainly said I had to do it tmrw. It wasn't the reaction I had thought he would have (nor was it the one I wanted, I think he's a bitch for being uninterested, there was like 4 kids in the class and he was doing nothing, so it's not like I inturputed him or anything)

Anyways, I think that's the best way I can explain this XP

OMGGG MY MOTHER DID THAT, SHE TOOK AWAY ALL THE BANDAIDS AND THE CLEANING SPRAY💀💀💀 Critical thinking just left her i guess :P

I hate when people take away bandaids when they find out about your self harm, like how does that help???? The whole point of trying to get someone to stop self harming is that it isn’t safe, and since taking bandaids away isn’t stopping them that just makes everything even more unsafe. Some ppl are dumb

FINALLY SOME GOOD...sfx...makeup...totally not real blood

I FEEL SO HAPPY AND JITTERY EHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEH YAYAYAYAYAYAYYAYAYAYA

Tw forrrrrrrrr cvtssss (n blood)

Block don't report please this is a coping mechanism :( I'm safe trust, my therapist looks at them often to see if there clean ^^

Cat scratchessss >.<

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Finally got some good bl00d

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:3

I thought I got more pics wth😭😭

Just as i did it

And this was my attempt to clean😭😭

(I did some bandaids cause it wouldn't stop bleeding and I'm not sure when my family's gonna get back :P)

Me bc my childhood actually DID really affect me and how I feel about men, women and people as a whole

As well as how I veiw myself and people close to me

:(

*posts something*

*posted one second ago*

*no notes*

What the fuck ???